Kremmen: The Movie
Encyclopedia
Kremmen: The Movie was a science fiction
comedy
film written and produced in Great Britain
, starring comedian Kenny Everett
. The film itself is centred around Everett's sci-fi character, Captain Kremmen
, a pastiche of Dan Dare
.
Award, and is presented with an enormous, fully automated spaceship shaped like a Brain
. While Dr. Gitfinger examines the controls, Carla persuades Kremmen to have casual sex
with her in their private quarters.
On Earth, the United Nations
, along with David Frost
, hold a secret meeting concerning an unknown matter and decide to alert Kremmen, who is now watching a documentary-film about trawler fishing in the North Sea
with Carla. They return to Earth
and go to meet the homosexual Head of Universal Security, simply named "Q", who informs Kremmen that planets are disappearing.
Along with their new robot Benny, Kremmen and the crew follow what appears to be a giant space-monster (who is apparently eating the planets) into the Snoop Galaxy, where the ship is swallowed whole by the monster. By pumping the Oxygen
reserves into the monster's stomach, the ship is vomited out of the stomach and the crew are saved.
, few fans warmed up to the crude animation (provided by Norwood Studios in Leeds
), and the continuous references to its thin plotline became monotonous after a while. The film was a straight-to-video release, accompanied by 30 minutes of dance routines by Hot Gossip
. Like Everett's other film, Bloodbath at the House of Death
, it is unavailable in the United States
.
:
The above three are the only characters to have appeared in the TV series who appear in the film. Below are characters completely new to the Kremmen series:
Science fiction
Science fiction is a genre of fiction dealing with imaginary but more or less plausible content such as future settings, futuristic science and technology, space travel, aliens, and paranormal abilities...
comedy
Comedy
Comedy , as a popular meaning, is any humorous discourse or work generally intended to amuse by creating laughter, especially in television, film, and stand-up comedy. This must be carefully distinguished from its academic definition, namely the comic theatre, whose Western origins are found in...
film written and produced in Great Britain
Great Britain
Great Britain or Britain is an island situated to the northwest of Continental Europe. It is the ninth largest island in the world, and the largest European island, as well as the largest of the British Isles...
, starring comedian Kenny Everett
Kenny Everett
Kenny Everett was an English comedian, radio DJ and television entertainer. Born Maurice James Christopher Cole, Everett is best known for his career as a radio DJ and for the Kenny Everett television shows.-Early life:...
. The film itself is centred around Everett's sci-fi character, Captain Kremmen
Captain Kremmen
Captain Kremmen was a science fiction radio serial set in the early 21st Century. It was written and performed for Capital Radio by the DJ Kenny Everett, and was also broadcast on Liverpool's Radio City and Nottingham's Radio Trent. It featured the eponymous vain and dimwitted spaceship captain...
, a pastiche of Dan Dare
Dan Dare
Dan Dare is a British science fiction comic hero, created by illustrator Frank Hampson who also wrote the first stories, that is, the Venus and Red Moon stories, and a complete storyline for Operation Saturn...
.
Plot
After a whole eon, Kremmen has been awarded The Most Fabulous Man in the World Apart from GodGod
God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism....
Award, and is presented with an enormous, fully automated spaceship shaped like a Brain
Brain
The brain is the center of the nervous system in all vertebrate and most invertebrate animals—only a few primitive invertebrates such as sponges, jellyfish, sea squirts and starfishes do not have one. It is located in the head, usually close to primary sensory apparatus such as vision, hearing,...
. While Dr. Gitfinger examines the controls, Carla persuades Kremmen to have casual sex
Casual sex
Casual sex or hooking up refers to certain types of human sexual activity outside the context of a romantic relationship. The term is not always used consistently: some use it to refer to any extramarital sex, some use it to refer to sex in a casual relationship, whereas others reserve its use for...
with her in their private quarters.
On Earth, the United Nations
United Nations
The United Nations is an international organization whose stated aims are facilitating cooperation in international law, international security, economic development, social progress, human rights, and achievement of world peace...
, along with David Frost
David Frost
Sir David Frost is a British broadcaster.David Frost may also refer to:*David Frost , South African golfer*David Frost , classical record producer*David Frost *Dave Frost, baseball pitcher...
, hold a secret meeting concerning an unknown matter and decide to alert Kremmen, who is now watching a documentary-film about trawler fishing in the North Sea
North Sea
In the southwest, beyond the Straits of Dover, the North Sea becomes the English Channel connecting to the Atlantic Ocean. In the east, it connects to the Baltic Sea via the Skagerrak and Kattegat, narrow straits that separate Denmark from Norway and Sweden respectively...
with Carla. They return to Earth
Earth
Earth is the third planet from the Sun, and the densest and fifth-largest of the eight planets in the Solar System. It is also the largest of the Solar System's four terrestrial planets...
and go to meet the homosexual Head of Universal Security, simply named "Q", who informs Kremmen that planets are disappearing.
Along with their new robot Benny, Kremmen and the crew follow what appears to be a giant space-monster (who is apparently eating the planets) into the Snoop Galaxy, where the ship is swallowed whole by the monster. By pumping the Oxygen
Oxygen
Oxygen is the element with atomic number 8 and represented by the symbol O. Its name derives from the Greek roots ὀξύς and -γενής , because at the time of naming, it was mistakenly thought that all acids required oxygen in their composition...
reserves into the monster's stomach, the ship is vomited out of the stomach and the crew are saved.
Errors
- Throughout Everett's previous history with the Kremmen series, Gitfinger was named fully as Dr. Heinrich von Gitfinger. In this, he is named Wolfgang Amaedus Gitfinger (as a play on Wolfgang Amadeus MozartWolfgang Amadeus MozartWolfgang Amadeus Mozart , baptismal name Johannes Chrysostomus Wolfgangus Theophilus Mozart , was a prolific and influential composer of the Classical era. He composed over 600 works, many acknowledged as pinnacles of symphonic, concertante, chamber, piano, operatic, and choral music...
)
- The ship's voice changes halfway through the film for an unknown reason
- The monster is never actually defeated, and the fate of the already-consumed planets is not revealed
- The colour of Q's dress suddenly changes from red to yellow to green throughout his monologue.
Reaction
Having been used to the animation of Cosgrove Hall FilmsCosgrove Hall Films
Cosgrove Hall Films was a British animation studio based in Chorlton-cum-Hardy, Manchester, that once was a major producer of children's television programmes. Cosgrove Hall's programmes are still seen in over eighty countries...
, few fans warmed up to the crude animation (provided by Norwood Studios in Leeds
Leeds
Leeds is a city and metropolitan borough in West Yorkshire, England. In 2001 Leeds' main urban subdivision had a population of 443,247, while the entire city has a population of 798,800 , making it the 30th-most populous city in the European Union.Leeds is the cultural, financial and commercial...
), and the continuous references to its thin plotline became monotonous after a while. The film was a straight-to-video release, accompanied by 30 minutes of dance routines by Hot Gossip
Hot Gossip
-Formation:Arlene Phillips came to London to learn and teach developing American Jazz dance routines. Employed as a dance teacher, she taught at locations including the Pineapple Dance Studios and the Italia Conti Stage School. In 1974, Phillips started forming the core of a troupe; Italia Conti...
. Like Everett's other film, Bloodbath at the House of Death
Bloodbath at the House of Death
Bloodbath at the House of Death is a 1983 comedy horror film starring the British comedian Kenny Everett and featuring Vincent Price. It is an over-the-top spoof loosely inspired by The Amityville Horror and other horror films from the same period....
, it is unavailable in the United States
United States
The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...
.
Characters
All characters depicted are played by Kenny EverettKenny Everett
Kenny Everett was an English comedian, radio DJ and television entertainer. Born Maurice James Christopher Cole, Everett is best known for his career as a radio DJ and for the Kenny Everett television shows.-Early life:...
:
- Captain KremmenCaptain KremmenCaptain Kremmen was a science fiction radio serial set in the early 21st Century. It was written and performed for Capital Radio by the DJ Kenny Everett, and was also broadcast on Liverpool's Radio City and Nottingham's Radio Trent. It featured the eponymous vain and dimwitted spaceship captain...
- Carla
- Dr. Gitfinger
The above three are the only characters to have appeared in the TV series who appear in the film. Below are characters completely new to the Kremmen series:
- Sam the Stoolie (A sentient stoolChairA chair is a stable, raised surface used to sit on, commonly for use by one person. Chairs are most often supported by four legs and have a back; however, a chair can have three legs or could have a different shape depending on the criteria of the chair specifications. A chair without a back or...
in a bar, Kremmen's undercover contact) - Benny the Hunchbacked Robot
- Ship (The personality of Kremmen's new ship)
- Q (The homosexual Head of Universal Security)
- Arnie "I once played a club on The MoonMoonThe Moon is Earth's only known natural satellite,There are a number of near-Earth asteroids including 3753 Cruithne that are co-orbital with Earth: their orbits bring them close to Earth for periods of time but then alter in the long term . These are quasi-satellites and not true moons. For more...
but there was no AtmosphereAtmosphereAn atmosphere is a layer of gases that may surround a material body of sufficient mass, and that is held in place by the gravity of the body. An atmosphere may be retained for a longer duration, if the gravity is high and the atmosphere's temperature is low...
" Schwarz (A robotic TV presenter)
See also
- Captain KremmenCaptain KremmenCaptain Kremmen was a science fiction radio serial set in the early 21st Century. It was written and performed for Capital Radio by the DJ Kenny Everett, and was also broadcast on Liverpool's Radio City and Nottingham's Radio Trent. It featured the eponymous vain and dimwitted spaceship captain...
- The eponymous hero of the film
- Kenny EverettKenny EverettKenny Everett was an English comedian, radio DJ and television entertainer. Born Maurice James Christopher Cole, Everett is best known for his career as a radio DJ and for the Kenny Everett television shows.-Early life:...
- The creator of the former