Dysfunctional family

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Dysfunctional family

A dysfunctional family is a family

Family

Family denotes a group of people affiliated by a common ancestry, affinity or co-residence. Although the concept of consanguinity originally referred to relations by "blood," some cultural anthropology have argued that one must understand the idea of "blood" metaphorically, and that many societies understand 'family' through other concepts r...
in which conflict

Conflict

Conflict is a part of discord caused by the actual or perceived opposition of needs, Value s and interests. A conflict can be internal or external ....
, misbehavior and even abuse

Abuse

Abuse refers to the use or treatment of something that is harmful. It can be classed by the target of abuse or the type of abuse....
on the part of individual members of the family occur continually and regularly, leading other members to accommodate such actions. Children sometimes grow up in such families with the understanding that such an arrangement is normal. Dysfunctional families are most often a result of the alcoholism

Alcoholism

Alcoholism is a term with multiple and sometimes conflicting definitions to describe the detrimental effects of alcohol intake.In common and historic usage, alcoholism refers to any condition that results in the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages despite health problems and negative social consequences....
, substance abuse, or other addiction

Addiction

The term "addiction" is used in many contexts to describe an obsession, compulsion, or excessive physical dependence or psychological dependence, such as: drug addiction, video game addiction, crime, alcoholism, compulsive overeating, problem gambling, computer addiction, pornography addiction, etc....
s of parents, parents' untreated mental illnesses/defects

Mental illness

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Examples of a dysfunctional family

Symptoms of family dysfunction	Dr. Dan Neuharth - 8 signs of unhealthy parenting	Dr. Dan Neuharth - 8 parenting styles which cause family dysfunction
Inconsistency and Unpredictability	"Dogmatic or chaotic parenting" (harsh and inflexible discipline Discipline In its most general sense, discipline refers to systematic instruction given to a disciple. This sense also preserves the origin of the word, which is Latin disciplina "instruction", from the root discere "to learn," and from which discipulus "disciple, pupil" also derives.... )	Chaotic (unstable parents who behave in a wildly inconsistent manner with their children)
Role reversals ("parentifying" children)		Childlike (parents who "parentify" their children. They tend to be needy and incompetent. Usually allow the other parent to abuse children.)
	Conditional love Love Love is any of a number of emotions and experiences related to a sense of strong affection and attachment . The word wikt:en:love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure to intense interpersonal attraction....	Depriving (parents who control by withholding love, money, praise Praise In its common usage, praise is the act of making positive statements about a person, object or idea, either in public or privately. Praise is typically, but not exclusively, earned relative to achievement and accomplishment.... , attention, or anything else their child needs or wants.)
"Closed family system" (a socially isolated family that discourages relationships with outsiders)	Social dysfunction or isolation Isolation The term Isolation may refer to:isolation: the act of being alone; separation.* Solitude, a social state* Solitary confinement* Isolation , measures taken to prevent the spread of communicable disease in a patient....
	Stifled speech (children not allowed to dissent or question authority Authority In government, authority is often used interchangeably with the term "power ". However, their meanings differ: while "power" refers to the ability to achieve certain ends, "authority" refers to a claim of legitimacy , the justification and right to exercise that power.... )	Cult Cult This article does not discuss "cult" in the original sense of "veneration" or "religious practice"; for that usage see Cult . See Cult for more meanings of the term "cult".... like (parents who feel uncertain and "raise their children according to rigid rules and roles".)
	"Denial of an Inner Life" (children are not allowed to develop their own value system Value system A value system is a set of consistent ethic values and measures used for the purpose of ethical or ideological integrity. A well defined value system is a moral code.... )	Smothering (parents do not allow their children to maintain a separate identity Identity Identity may refer to:... )
Steven Farmer also lists these symptoms: Denial (i.e. a refusal to acknowledge the alcoholism of a parent or child/teenager; ignoring complaints of sexual abuse Sexual abuse Sexual abuse, also referred to as molestation, is the forcing of undesired sexual acts by one person upon another. The offender is referred to as a molester/molestor/ abuser/sexual abuser.... ) Lack of empathy Empathy Empathy is the capacity to share and understand another's emotion and feelings. It is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes", or in some way experience what the other person is feeling.... toward family members Lack of clear boundaries (i.e. throwing away personal possessions that belong to others, inappropriate touching Haptics Haptics refers to the sense of touch . It may refer to:* Haptic technology, technology that interfaces with the user through the sense of touch... , etc.) Mixed Messages Extremes in conflict Conflict Conflict is a part of discord caused by the actual or perceived opposition of needs, Value s and interests. A conflict can be internal or external .... (either too much or too little fighting between family members)	Neuharth also includes these signs of unhealthy parenting: Disrespect Respect Respect is esteem for, or a sense of the worth or excellence of, a person, a personal quality, ability, or a manifestation of a personal quality or ability.... Emotion Emotion An emotion is a mental and physiological state associated with a wide variety of feelings, thoughts, and behavior.Emotions are subjective experiences, or experienced from an individual point of view.... al intolerance (family members not allowed to express the "wrong" emotions) Ridicule	Neuharth also includes these dysfunctional parenting styles: Using (destructively narcissistic parents) Abusing (parents who use physical, verbal, or sexual violence Violence Violence is the expression of physical force against self or other, compelling action against one's will on pain of being hurt. Variant uses of the term refer to the destruction of non-living objects .... to dominate their children) Perfectionist (parents who "fixate on order, prestige, power, and/or perfect appearances".)

Steven Farmer is the author of Adult Children of Abusive Parents, .

Dr. Dan Neuharth is the author of and uses the terms "controlling parents", "unhealthy control" and "over control" throughout his book.

Effects on children

Children growing up in a dysfunctional family have been known to adopt one or more of six basic roles:

"The Good Child" – a child who assumes the parental role.
"The Problem Child" – the child who is blamed for most problems, in spite of often being the only emotionally stable one in the family.
"The Caretaker" – the one who takes responsibility for the emotional well-being of the family.
"The Lost Child" – the inconspicuous, quiet one, whose needs are often ignored or hidden.
"The Mascot" – uses comedy
Comedy

Comedy as a popular meaning, is any humorous discourse generally intended to amuse, especially in television, film, and stand-up comedy. This must be carefully distinguished from its academic definition, namely the comic theatre, whose Western culture origins are found in Ancient Greece....
to divert attention away from the increasingly dysfunctional family system.
"The Mastermind" – the opportunist who capitalizes on the other family members' faults in order to get whatever he/she wants.

They may also:

think only of themselves to make up the difference of their childhoods. They're still learning the balance of self-love
distrust others
have difficulty expressing emotions
have low self-esteem
Self-esteem

In psychology, self-esteem reflects a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth.Self-esteem encompasses beliefs and emotions ....
or have a poor self image
Self image

A person's self image is the mind picture, generally of a kind that is quite resistant to change, that depicts not only details that are potentially available to objective investigation by others , but also items that have been learned by that person about himself or herself, either from personal experiences or by internalizing the judgments...
have difficulty forming healthy relationship
Interpersonal relationship

An interpersonal relationship is a relatively long-term association between two or more people. This association may be based on emotions like love and Liking#As_a_verb, regular business interactions, or some other type of social commitment....
s with others
feel angry
Anger

Anger is an emotional state that may range from minor irritation to intense rage. The physical effects of anger include increased heart rate, blood pressure,and levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline....
, anxious
Anxiety

Anxiety is a psychological and physiological state characterized by cognitive, somatic, emotional, and behavioral components. These components combine to create an unpleasant feeling that is typically associated with uneasiness, fear, or worry....
, depressed
Depression (mood)

In the fields of psychology and psychiatry, the terms depression or depressed refer to sadness and other related emotions and behaviours. It can be thought of as either a disease or a syndrome....
, isolated from others, or unlovable
perpetuate dysfunctional behaviors in their other relationships (especially their children)
lack the ability to be playful, or childlike, and may "grow up too fast"
may be unpatriotic to their hometown, state, province, or country, and often learn to live far away from their families.

Dysfunctional family

Examples of a dysfunctional family

Effects on children

See also