Alf's Imperial Army
Encyclopedia
Alf's Imperial Army, founded in 1972 , by Ian Brackenbury Channell (who was later appointed Wizard of New Zealand) is New Zealand
New Zealand
New Zealand is an island country in the south-western Pacific Ocean comprising two main landmasses and numerous smaller islands. The country is situated some east of Australia across the Tasman Sea, and roughly south of the Pacific island nations of New Caledonia, Fiji, and Tonga...

's longest-running and largest pacifist warfare organisation. Organised loosely along military lines, it has Regiments in several New Zealand towns and cities. As a self declared "army" it exists to do "battle" using strictly non-harmful weapons, following the rules and conventions of the pastime known as "pacifist warfare". Alf's have held many highly publicised battles against a wide range of New Zealand organisations and community groups.

Mythos and Uniform

The mythos and uniform of Alf's Imperial Army is that of 19th century Victorian
Victorian era
The Victorian era of British history was the period of Queen Victoria's reign from 20 June 1837 until her death on 22 January 1901. It was a long period of peace, prosperity, refined sensibilities and national self-confidence...

 British soldiers . The Army therefore is strongly monarchist  and does battle in the name of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II of New Zealand
Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom
Elizabeth II is the constitutional monarch of 16 sovereign states known as the Commonwealth realms: the United Kingdom, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Jamaica, Barbados, the Bahamas, Grenada, Papua New Guinea, the Solomon Islands, Tuvalu, Saint Lucia, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, Belize,...

. Accordingly, their costumes closely resemble the uniforms of the British Army, in particular the redcoats
Red coat (British army)
Red coat or Redcoat is a historical term used to refer to soldiers of the British Army because of the red uniforms formerly worn by the majority of regiments. From the late 17th century to the early 20th century, the uniform of most British soldiers, , included a madder red coat or coatee...

 circa 1881.

Pacifist Warfare

Alf's Imperial Army is a proponent of "pacifist warfare" and fights its battles using strictly non-harmful weapons, such as newspaper swords and cardboard shields for personal duelling. 'Mass effect' weapons such as water bombs, flour bombs, porridge bombs, funnelators (huge slingshots), and meths mortars armed with soft or rotten fruit are also used (though water or flour bombs are the most common). 'Psychological Weapons' such as the dreaded Can-Can charge, heavy duty assault poetry, mass singing and vicious taunting are also permissible.

Aside from being a soldier, participants in a pacifist battle (usually organized into "armies") may have roles such as scout, magician, witch, official scribe, photographer, or whatever other roles may be called for by the mythos of a particular group or particular battle. The most indispensable role however is that of nurses/medics/surgeons who bring the "dead" back to life by dispensing "medicine" (often candy) or "elixirs" (usually port wine
Port wine
Port wine is a Portuguese fortified wine produced exclusively in the Douro Valley in the northern provinces of Portugal. It is typically a sweet, red wine, often served as a dessert wine, and comes in dry, semi-dry, and white varieties...

, but may be simply water).

Battles usually take place in public places and are intended as a kind of theatrical event that is fun for the participants and exciting and funny for the audience. As such, there is no fixed way of determining who won a pacifist battle, and often two sides may agree to disagree so as to have an excuse to have another battle. Often who "won" may depend upon who tells the best story afterward, who writes the best history afterward, who the audience best remembers afterward, or sometimes the entire story and organization of the battle may have been pre-scripted beforehand.
Pacifist Warfare is not a form of historical re-enactment. The armies' uniforms and weapons are not historically accurate, nor are battles any attempt to re-enact any past event.

Pacifist Warfare originated before Live Roleplaying. Participants in a pacifist battle are not playing a particular character, rather they are playing a role in a performance. They also do not have hit-points.

Enemies

Being monarchist, Alf's Imperial Army often battles groups of self-proclaimed Republicans. One example is The Battle for Oamaru that took place in October 2000, when the Army fought against a motley but determined band of about 40 New Zealand Green Party members calling themselves "Green Republicans" who assembled in Oamaru
Oamaru
Oamaru , the largest town in North Otago, in the South Island of New Zealand, is the main town in the Waitaki District. It is 80 kilometres south of Timaru and 120 kilometres north of Dunedin, on the Pacific coast, and State Highway 1 and the railway Main South Line connects it to both...

 under Field Marshal Keith Locke
Keith Locke
Keith James Locke is a current New Zealand MP representing the Green Party who was first elected to parliament in 1999. he is the Green Party spokesperson on Foreign Affairs, Defence, Ethnic Affairs, Pacific Affairs, Human Rights, Immigration, Police and Auckland Transport...

, their Commander in Chief. According to the Greens all those on the Alf side committed suicide (sic).

Alf's Imperial Army has battled against many different groups , including political parties , the NZ Police , student clubs and student hostels , The Outward Bound
Outward Bound
Outward Bound is an international, non-profit, independent, outdoor educationorganization with approximately 40 schools around the world and 200,000 participants per year...

 organisation , community organisations , Sea Cadets , schools , TV stations, nudists , and of course other pacifist warfare groups . One of their major rivals was the McGillicuddy Highland Army
McGillicuddy Highland Army
The McGillicuddy Highland Army is the fighting wing of New Zealand's Clan McGillicuddy and does battle with enemies of the Clan in accordance with the rules of the pastime of pacifist warfare. Battles have taken place at wide range of locations and events around the country...

 , and as such Alf's also performed the vital role of preventing the Jacobite McGillicuddy Serious Party
McGillicuddy Serious Party
The McGillicuddy Serious Party operated as a satirical political party in New Zealand politics during the late 20th century. Between 1984 and 1999, McGillicuddy Serious provided "colour" to New Zealand politics to ensure that citizens not take the political process too seriously...

 from gaining power.

Since the inception of Alf's Imperial Army, other similar pacifist warfare groups — many of them unaffiliated to Alf's — have sprung up around New Zealand. Notable among them are the McGillicuddy Highland Army
McGillicuddy Highland Army
The McGillicuddy Highland Army is the fighting wing of New Zealand's Clan McGillicuddy and does battle with enemies of the Clan in accordance with the rules of the pastime of pacifist warfare. Battles have taken place at wide range of locations and events around the country...

, the Waitati Militia, and the Czarist Russia
Russia
Russia or , officially known as both Russia and the Russian Federation , is a country in northern Eurasia. It is a federal semi-presidential republic, comprising 83 federal subjects...

n influenced First Lindskii Regiment.

Brief history

Alf's Imperial Army, along with the concept of pacifist warfare, was created by The Wizard of New Zealand
The Wizard of New Zealand
The Wizard of New Zealand, QSM is an English-born New Zealand educator, comedian, magician and politician, who has become something of a national icon of New Zealand.-Life and career:...

 in 1972 at the University of Melbourne
University of Melbourne
The University of Melbourne is a public university located in Melbourne, Victoria. Founded in 1853, it is the second oldest university in Australia and the oldest in Victoria...

 in Australia
Australia
Australia , officially the Commonwealth of Australia, is a country in the Southern Hemisphere comprising the mainland of the Australian continent, the island of Tasmania, and numerous smaller islands in the Indian and Pacific Oceans. It is the world's sixth-largest country by total area...

 . Pacifist warfare was brought to New Zealand in 1973 when Colonel Catford, a follower of the Wizard, moved to New Zealand and founded The 1st Canterbury Crusaders Regiment (later renamed the 1st Canterbury Light Infantry) in Christchurch and organised the first pacifist battle at the city's University of Canterbury
University of Canterbury
The University of Canterbury , New Zealand's second-oldest university, operates its main campus in the suburb of Ilam in the city of Christchurch, New Zealand...

. Below is a list of Alf's Imperial Army regiments; those still active are bolded.
Regiment City Year Founded Notes
0th Melbourne Regt Melbourne, Australia  1972 The 0th number was given later.
1st Canterbury Light Infantry Christchurch
Christchurch
Christchurch is the largest city in the South Island of New Zealand, and the country's second-largest urban area after Auckland. It lies one third of the way down the South Island's east coast, just north of Banks Peninsula which itself, since 2006, lies within the formal limits of...

 *
1973 Rarely active
2nd Duke of Wellington's Own (Boots) Regt Wellington
Wellington City
Wellington City Council is a territorial authority in the Wellington region of New Zealand. Wellington city extends as far north as Linden, and includes the rural areas of Makara and Ohariu. It is New Zealand's third-largest city, behind Auckland and Christchurch.Wellington attained city status in...

 
1975 Disbanded in 1999
3rd New Edinburgh Highland Regt Dunedin
Dunedin
Dunedin is the second-largest city in the South Island of New Zealand, and the principal city of the Otago Region. It is considered to be one of the four main urban centres of New Zealand for historic, cultural, and geographic reasons. Dunedin was the largest city by territorial land area until...

 
1977 no longer active
The Auckland Regiment Auckland
Auckland
The Auckland metropolitan area , in the North Island of New Zealand, is the largest and most populous urban area in the country with residents, percent of the country's population. Auckland also has the largest Polynesian population of any city in the world...

 
1979 Never formally numbered, disbanded.
The Hawke's Bay Militia Hawke's Bay
Hawke's Bay
Hawke's Bay is a region of New Zealand. Hawke's Bay is recognised on the world stage for its award-winning wines. The regional council sits in both the cities of Napier and Hastings.-Geography:...

 
1979 Never formally numbered, no longer active
4th Lady Massey's Volunteers Palmerston North
Palmerston North
Palmerston North is the main city of the Manawatu-Wanganui region of the North Island of New Zealand. It is an inland city with a population of and is the country's seventh largest city and eighth largest urban area. Palmerston North is located in the eastern Manawatu Plains near the north bank...

 
1980 no longer active
5th Waikato Cavalry Hamilton
Hamilton, New Zealand
Hamilton is the centre of New Zealand's fourth largest urban area, and Hamilton City is the country's fourth largest territorial authority. Hamilton is in the Waikato Region of the North Island, approximately south of Auckland...

 
1980 Disbanded 1982
5th Waikato Dragoons Hamilton
Hamilton, New Zealand
Hamilton is the centre of New Zealand's fourth largest urban area, and Hamilton City is the country's fourth largest territorial authority. Hamilton is in the Waikato Region of the North Island, approximately south of Auckland...

 
1985 -
6th Irish Light Infantry Gisborne
Gisborne, New Zealand
-Economy:The harbour was host to many ships in the past and had developed as a river port to provide a more secure location for shipping compared with the open roadstead of Poverty Bay which can be exposed to southerly swells. A meat works was sited beside the harbour and meat and wool was shipped...

 
1986 no longer active
7th Cargill Dragoons Invercargill
Invercargill
Invercargill is the southernmost and westernmost city in New Zealand, and one of the southernmost cities in the world. It is the commercial centre of the Southland region. It lies in the heart of the wide expanse of the Southland Plains on the Oreti or New River some 18 km north of Bluff,...

 
1987 Left Alf's Army
7th Whitestone Grenadiers Oamaru
Oamaru
Oamaru , the largest town in North Otago, in the South Island of New Zealand, is the main town in the Waitaki District. It is 80 kilometres south of Timaru and 120 kilometres north of Dunedin, on the Pacific coast, and State Highway 1 and the railway Main South Line connects it to both...

 
1988 Inactive for a time. Re-established as 8th Rgt.
8th Bombay Grenadiers Auckland
Auckland
The Auckland metropolitan area , in the North Island of New Zealand, is the largest and most populous urban area in the country with residents, percent of the country's population. Auckland also has the largest Polynesian population of any city in the world...

 
1988 no longer active
10th Auckland Grenadiers Auckland
Auckland
The Auckland metropolitan area , in the North Island of New Zealand, is the largest and most populous urban area in the country with residents, percent of the country's population. Auckland also has the largest Polynesian population of any city in the world...

 
1989 Merged with 8th Bombay Grenadiers
10th Podian Phoenix Regt London
London
London is the capital city of :England and the :United Kingdom, the largest metropolitan area in the United Kingdom, and the largest urban zone in the European Union by most measures. Located on the River Thames, London has been a major settlement for two millennia, its history going back to its...

, United Kingdom
United Kingdom
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern IrelandIn the United Kingdom and Dependencies, other languages have been officially recognised as legitimate autochthonous languages under the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages...

 
1990 no longer active
12th New Plymouth Regt of Foot New Plymouth
New Plymouth
New Plymouth is the major city of the Taranaki Region on the west coast of the North Island of New Zealand. It is named after Plymouth, Devon, England, from where the first English settlers migrated....

 
1991 no longer active
16th Wellington Wegiment Wellington
Wellington City
Wellington City Council is a territorial authority in the Wellington region of New Zealand. Wellington city extends as far north as Linden, and includes the rural areas of Makara and Ohariu. It is New Zealand's third-largest city, behind Auckland and Christchurch.Wellington attained city status in...

 
2004 -
KNUTS Artillery Regiment Christchurch
Christchurch
Christchurch is the largest city in the South Island of New Zealand, and the country's second-largest urban area after Auckland. It lies one third of the way down the South Island's east coast, just north of Banks Peninsula which itself, since 2006, lies within the formal limits of...

 
2008 -
17th Cotswold Volunteers Auckland
Auckland
The Auckland metropolitan area , in the North Island of New Zealand, is the largest and most populous urban area in the country with residents, percent of the country's population. Auckland also has the largest Polynesian population of any city in the world...

 
2011 -

  • The 1st Canterbury Light Infantry Regt has a 'B Company' in Takaka.


As of late 2011 the Army continues in a reduced and somewhat less public manner and is now largely based off-campuses. Active regiments are still fighting the good fight in Auckland, Christchurch, Hamilton, Oamaru and Wellington, with detachments in Dunedin and Takaka.
The Wizard of New Zealand still performs the role of Generalissimo of Alf's Imperial Army, and is its Supreme Commander.

On December 31, 2007 Alf's Imperial Army won a victory in a battle in Oamaru against the Clan McGillicuddy and their "Martian" allies thus saving the world from conquest. There is a video clip of this battle on youtube.

Related links

The Generalissimo (and Founder) of Alf's Imperial Army

Alf's Imperial Army Regimental Websites

Rivals
  • First Lindskii Regiment
  • KAOS, Killing As Organised Sport
  • McGillicuddy Highland Army
    McGillicuddy Highland Army
    The McGillicuddy Highland Army is the fighting wing of New Zealand's Clan McGillicuddy and does battle with enemies of the Clan in accordance with the rules of the pastime of pacifist warfare. Battles have taken place at wide range of locations and events around the country...



Videos on the Web
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