Poolside Chats
Encyclopedia
Poolside Chats with Neil Hamburger
Neil Hamburger
Neil Hamburger is a standup comedian character played by comedian and musician Gregg Turkington.-Style:Hamburger's live act, which is quite different from his many albums, features a barrage of question/answer jokes aimed often at celebrity targets, including Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, The Red...

 is a live webcast
Webcast
A webcast is a media presentation distributed over the Internet using streaming media technology to distribute a single content source to many simultaneous listeners/viewers. A webcast may either be distributed live or on demand...

 that airs on comedian Tom Green
Tom Green
Michael Thomas "Tom" Green is a Canadian actor, rapper, writer, comedian, talk show host and media personality. Best known for his shock humour brand of comedy, Green found mainstream prominence via his MTV television show The Tom Green Show...

's website.

Description

Poolside Chats airs live following Tom Green's House Tonight. The star of the show is self-described "America's Funnyman", Neil Hamburger
Neil Hamburger
Neil Hamburger is a standup comedian character played by comedian and musician Gregg Turkington.-Style:Hamburger's live act, which is quite different from his many albums, features a barrage of question/answer jokes aimed often at celebrity targets, including Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, The Red...

. Neil takes calls in which he usually trades insults with the callers. He has referred to some of his guests as "diseased degenerate rock and rollers." There is no schedule for the show; it airs randomly when there are suitable gaps in Hamburger's touring schedule. The most recent episode aired in January 2007.

List of shows

Date Special guest(s)
31 August 2006 Buzz Osborne
Buzz Osborne
Roger "Buzz" Osborne , also known as King Buzzo, is the guitarist/vocalist/songwriter and technically the only remaining founding member of the Melvins...

 (Watch)
5 September 2006 Pleaseeasaur
Pleaseeasaur
Pleaseeasaur is a comedic musical act made of JP Hasson . The music is high energy camp style humor. The live performance usually includes JP Hasson in many costumes, each of which coincides with the song, along with multi-media animations of related images on a large screen...

 (Main guest), Pool Guy Don (Watch)
27 September 2006 Jack Grisham
Jack Grisham
Jack Grisham is an American rock musician, raconteur and political activist. He is the vocalist for the punk band T.S.O.L. , which emerged from the 1980s Los Angeles punk rock scene, along with Black Flag, Circle Jerks and Social Distortion. Grisham has also fronted the bands The Joykiller, Tender...

 (Main guest), Jack's hairstylist (Watch)
24 October 2006 Bonnie "Prince" Billy
Will Oldham
Will Oldham , better known by the stage name Bonnie 'Prince' Billy, is an American singer-songwriter and actor. From 1993 to 1997, he performed and recorded under variations of the Palace name, including the Palace Brothers, Palace Songs, and Palace Music...

 (Main guest), Andy Dick
Andy Dick
Andrew R. "Andy" Dick is an American comedian, actor, musician and television/film producer. His first regular television role was on the short-lived but highly influential Ben Stiller Show. In the mid-1990s, he had a long-running stint on NBC's NewsRadio...

, Pool Guy Don (Watch)
8 November 2006 Kyle Gass
Kyle Gass
Kyle Richard Gass , also known as KG or Kage, is an American rock musician, singer-songwriter and actor. He is a member of the bands Tenacious D and Trainwreck. In Tenacious D , Gass plays lead guitar and sings backup vocals, and also plays the role of Black's comic foil in most of their comedy...

 (Main guest), Steve O, Pool Guy Don (Watch)
15 January 2007 Tim Heidecker
Tim Heidecker
Tim Heidecker is an American actor, comedian, musician, writer and director. He is one half of the comedy team of Tim and Eric...

, Eric Wareheim
Eric Wareheim
Eric Wareheim is an American actor, comedian, writer and director. He is one half of the comedy team of Tim and Eric. Wareheim, along with Tim Heidecker, created the television shows Tom Goes to the Mayor, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! and Check It Out! with Dr...

 (Watch)

The format

Poolside Chats has a simple format. Filmed outside of Tom Green's house in the evenings, positioned by Green's outdoor pool, hence 'Poolside'. There is a small table where a telephone is positioned, from which Hamburger takes calls for his guest(s). Hamburger is seated to the right of the table, and his guest(s) to the left.

Hamburger takes a mix of questions he has thought of himself and questions from callers. The show operates without (or with very ineffectual) call screening
Call screening
Call screening is the process of evaluating the characteristics of a telephone call before deciding how or whether to answer it.Some methods may include:* listening to the message being recorded on an answering machine or voice mail...

, meaning anyone can call in and ask anything, serious or otherwise.

The show's affiliation with Tom Green (a notoriously confrontational prankster), coupled with its internet-only fanbase leads to the majority of the calls being pranks
Prank call
A prank call is a form of practical joke committed over the telephone. Prank phone calls began to gain an America-wide following over a period of many years, as they gradually became a staple of the obscure and amusing cassette tapes traded amongst musicians, sound engineers, and media traders...

, insulting Hamburger or his guest(s), shouting racial slurs, or quoting internet memes. This led to Hamburger himself lashing out angrily against the callers (often without even being provoked), and hanging up or berating callers if they either did not respond quickly enough or gave signs they appeared to be setting up for a prank.

This haphazard format leads to few actual questions of worth being asked, and relies on a torrent of genuine insults exchanged between callers and Hamburger for its comedic value.

Mania TV and Episode 1

In the episode of Tom Green Live before Poolside Chats, Tom Green (out of frustration with a repeatedly failing phone system) smashed the thousand-dollar Pepper Pad
Pepper Pad
The Pepper Pad is a Linux-based mobile computer with Internet capability and doubles as a handheld game console. It also serves as a portable multimedia device...

 portable computer supplied by Mania TV. In response, Mania TV cut off the live feed, changing it to Mania TV's feed so viewers saw its programming instead of Poolside Chats.

Poolside Chats carried on unknowingly, until callers informed Hamburger that the feed had been changed (the first few minutes of the show aired before the feed was changed). This led to angry callers demanding the feed to be fixed, Hamburger greeting callers with 'You're not on the air!' and 'Poolside SHIT with Neil Hamburger' (phrases that would be used again in future episodes), and bemused conversations between Hamburger, guest King Buzzo and Tom Green.

With one angry caller, Hamburger claimed that Bob Dole
Bob Dole
Robert Joseph "Bob" Dole is an American attorney and politician. Dole represented Kansas in the United States Senate from 1969 to 1996, was Gerald Ford's Vice Presidential running mate in the 1976 presidential election, and was Senate Majority Leader from 1985 to 1987 and in 1995 and 1996...

 had censored the show, to which the caller replied 'Yeah, fuck Bob Dole!'. Hamburger then suggested the caller 'go down to the local wall' and spray paint 'Fuck Bob Dole' on it, to which the caller replied 'I'll spray paint everything'. This has become a joke with fans of Poolside Chats, who bring up their dislike for Dole because of his censorship.

Eventually Hamburger began breaking character
Breaking character
Breaking character, "to break character", is a theatrical term used to describe when an actor, while actively performing in character, slips out of character and behaves as his or her actual self...

 - his voice changed from the Hamburger voice to his real voice, he repeatedly laughed and spoke 'un-Hamburger-like'. This increased when Hamburger was informed as to why Mania TV changed the feed - completely breaking character and actually looking shocked. This eventually led to everyone involved (Hamburger, Buzzo & Tom Green) ending the show early and abruptly, realizing that there really was no show.

The episode was briefly available to view on the On Demand section of the site, before being taken down. There has been some speculation as to why this was. Some have claimed that it is because the audio quality of the episode wasn't up to the standards of future shows. It is more likely that the reason was due to both Hamburger's breaking of character during the episode, and the general chaos the show had fallen into.

Other problems with episodes

Episode 2 was filmed 'live-to-tape' as technical difficulties meant the first few minutes of the show were not broadcast live, but the feed returned after, leading to humorous conversations between Hamburger, Pleaseeasaur and callers who did not know the feed was back up.

An episode of Poolside Chats was planned on February 12, 2007 with special guests King Buzzo and 'Quacker', but was pushed back to February 14, 2007, and then canceled altogether. This was mostly likely due to traveling issues as Hamburger was touring with Tenacious D
Tenacious D
Tenacious D is an American rock band that was formed in Los Angeles, California in 1994. Composed of lead vocalist and guitarist Jack Black and lead guitarist and vocalist Kyle Gass, the band has released two albums – Tenacious D and The Pick of Destiny...

 as their opening act.

As of March 14, 2007, only Episodes 4 and 5 were available to view in the On Demand section of TomGreen.com. When the On Demand section was 'taken down' because 'the system couldn't handle it' (as reported by Tom Green himself) it was said all the previous content would be available from before. No further episodes of Poolside Chats, or major-length content from TomGreen.com had been put back up until all the episodes were removed.

Removal from TomGreen.com

As of the April 4, 2007, all previously hosted episodes of Poolside Chats were removed from the On Demand section of TomGreen.com, as well as the section dedicated to the show. No reason has been given for this, and around the same time the official forum for TomGreen.com also was removed, which featured a section dedicated to discussion for the show. Only via Hamburger's official website and the Poolside Chats fansite are the episodes currently available.

The future of Poolside Chats

Hamburger had originally stated on the official forum for TomGreen.com that he would be available for a new episode to be filmed on either March 26 and/or 27, 2007. Instead of this, Hamburger appeared on the March 26 episode of Tom Green Live as a guest along with Steve-O and 'Quacker', who was to be a guest on Poolside Chats previously. During this show Hamburger walked off set. This combined with the removal of old episodes from the "On Demand" section of TomGreen.com, which targeted the 'silliness' and comedy Green has been previously associated with, made it uncertain if Hamburger and Poolside Chats would be returning for future episodes.

The Poolside Chats section returned to the "On Demand" section of the TomGreen.com website on May 19, 2007, containing only an 'archive' clip of Hamburger performing as the opening comedy act for an Alien Ant Farm
Alien Ant Farm
Alien Ant Farm is an American alternative rock band that formed in Riverside, California, in 1995. Their name comes from an idea original guitarist Terry Corso had about aliens and the earth: "I was daydreaming at my dull desk job with my feet up, and I thought to myself, 'Wouldn't it be cool if...

 performance, along with some previously removed episodes of Tom Green Live (including the above mentioned episode with Steve-O). These were only available to view for a few months before again being removed.

On the June 19, 2007 episode of Tom Green Live, which featured Hamburger as the guest, Tom Green stated that Poolside Chats was not canceled, and apologized to Hamburger for both his and Steve-O's behavior on the show. In typical Hamburger style this was blown off as Steve-O being 'on drugs' and that he 'needed help'.

Currently, there has not been a new episode of Poolside Chats for over two years, although Hamburger still appears as a guest on Tom Green's House Tonight (formerly Tom Green Live). There is yet to be official confirmation from either Green or Hamburger as to whether Poolside Chats will make a return.

On July 23, 2011 Hamburger responded to a fan on Twitter asking if there would ever be new Poolside Chats episodes by saying "50/50!".

External links

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