Kettu Kalyanam
Encyclopedia
Kettu Kalyanam, also known as Thali Kettu was the name of an elaborate marriage ceremony of the Malayala Kshatriyas
Malayala Kshatriyas
The term Malayala Kshatriya is used to denote a number of warrior and aristocratic clans belonging to the Nair caste claiming the mythical Chandravanshi and Nagavanshi Kshatriya descent in Kerala, South India...

, Samanthan
Samanthan
Samantan Nair or more commonly Samantan was a generic term applied to dignify a collection of Kshatriya sub-clans among the ruling elite and feudal estate owners of Kerala belonging to the Nayar race.-Historical background:Kerala was under the second Chera Empire approximately during 800...

s, Nair
Nair
Nair , also known as Nayar , refers to "not a unitary group but a named category of castes", which historically embody several castes and many subdivisions, not all of whom bore the Nair title. These people historically live in the present-day Indian state of Kerala...

s, Maaran
Maaran
Maaran is the name given to the temple musicians of Travancore, Cochin and Malabar in the state of Kerala, India whose primary duty was to provide the traditional temple Sopanam music. Their position in the caste system varies from place to place in Kerala...

, and Ambalavasi
Ambalavasi
Ambalavasi is a generic name for a collection of castes among Hindus in Kerala who render temple services.-Etymology:The term Ambalavasi is derived from two Malayalam words, being Ambalam and Vasi...

s communities of the Indian state of Kerala
Kerala
or Keralam is an Indian state located on the Malabar coast of south-west India. It was created on 1 November 1956 by the States Reorganisation Act by combining various Malayalam speaking regions....

. The customs varied from region to region and caste
Caste
Caste is an elaborate and complex social system that combines elements of endogamy, occupation, culture, social class, tribal affiliation and political power. It should not be confused with race or social class, e.g. members of different castes in one society may belong to the same race, as in India...

 to caste and below is the general practices involved.

Age

The age for Kettu Kalyanam is generally taken to be eleven years old though it may be conducted anytime before also. As the ceremony is greatly expensive advantage is taken of a single occasion and all the pre pubescent girls in the family, irrespective of age are married off, including infants sometimes.

Thali and selection of grooms

The Thali is the major part of the ceremony and is the wedding locket, also known as Mangalsutram. The bridegroom who ties the Thali, in the domains of Travancore
Travancore
Kingdom of Travancore was a former Hindu feudal kingdom and Indian Princely State with its capital at Padmanabhapuram or Trivandrum ruled by the Travancore Royal Family. The Kingdom of Travancore comprised most of modern day southern Kerala, Kanyakumari district, and the southernmost parts of...

 in Kerala
Kerala
or Keralam is an Indian state located on the Malabar coast of south-west India. It was created on 1 November 1956 by the States Reorganisation Act by combining various Malayalam speaking regions....

 can be selected only from certain families, appointed for the very purpose by the Kings of the land, known as Machampikar. Every village usually has three of four such families which rank among the most respectable families therein. In northern Travancore
Travancore
Kingdom of Travancore was a former Hindu feudal kingdom and Indian Princely State with its capital at Padmanabhapuram or Trivandrum ruled by the Travancore Royal Family. The Kingdom of Travancore comprised most of modern day southern Kerala, Kanyakumari district, and the southernmost parts of...

 and the remaining regions of Kerala
Kerala
or Keralam is an Indian state located on the Malabar coast of south-west India. It was created on 1 November 1956 by the States Reorganisation Act by combining various Malayalam speaking regions....

 the Machampi institution is absent and anybody of suitable caste such as the King himself, Thampan
Thampan
-Etymology:The word Thampan is a contraction of the term Thampuran which is a corrupt version of the Sanskrit term Samrat and stands for Your Lordship. The title of Varma is some times affixed to the name of a Thampan...

s, Thirumulpads, Aryapattars etc may tie the Thali. The only difference is that while the Machampi men can tie the Thali only for one girl and take her as his 'wife', the other tiers, mentioned above, may tie the Thali for all the girls.

Preliminaries

A day is fixed for the preliminaries of the wedding when all the relations and members of the families involved are invited as also the astrologer who belongs to the Kaniyan caste. He checks the suitable dates and also whether the horoscope of the bride and groom match and accordingly writes down the date and time for the ceremony on the charthu and hands it over to the senior most male member of the Tharavad. The Kaniyan is then dismissed with gifts and presents. The Kaniyan also fixes a suitable day for fixing the main pillar of the marriage hall, known as the pandal.

A few days before the commencement of the construction of the pandal, invitations are sent out and in response to this the invitees come and render substantial aid in building the pandal. The main pillar of the Pandal is made of the Jack Tree (Alstonia Scholaris) which is cut for the same purpose that very day and raised at the south-west corner of the pandal, which itself is built on the eastern side of the house. The pandal is generally square or rectangular in shape.

If the family be of rank and influence a Kathiru Mandapam is built inside the pandal i.e. a raised floor with a groined roof, beautifully decorated with pictures, mirrors and glass globes. It is here that the actual marriage ceremony takes place and the guests are seated around this Kathiru Mandapam.

First day

The first item in the celebrations is known as the Ayani Oonu which is a sumptuous banquet given by the bride's people to the family of the groom, known as the Manavalan. On the first day, in the morning, the girl (or girls), well dressed and adorned with ornaments holding in her left hand a tray containing her wearing apparel after bath, a mirror and other toilette articles and a metal lamp called Changalavatta in her right, is taken to the bathing tank in a procession headed by a lady of a Machampi family with great amount of music and celebration.

After bath the girl is taken back to the house and seated in a separate room and another feast is given to the assembled guests. Then comes the rite called the Kaapu Kettu or Pratisara Bandham, a piece of string symbolical of a solemn resolve to do a particular act) round the wrist of the girl. This is done by the Maaran
Maaran
Maaran is the name given to the temple musicians of Travancore, Cochin and Malabar in the state of Kerala, India whose primary duty was to provide the traditional temple Sopanam music. Their position in the caste system varies from place to place in Kerala...

 in Travancore
Travancore
Kingdom of Travancore was a former Hindu feudal kingdom and Indian Princely State with its capital at Padmanabhapuram or Trivandrum ruled by the Travancore Royal Family. The Kingdom of Travancore comprised most of modern day southern Kerala, Kanyakumari district, and the southernmost parts of...

 and in other parts of Kerala
Kerala
or Keralam is an Indian state located on the Malabar coast of south-west India. It was created on 1 November 1956 by the States Reorganisation Act by combining various Malayalam speaking regions....

 the Marar or the brother of the girl.This is accompanied by a song known as Subhadra Veli, the account of the marriage of Subhadra
Subhadra
Image:Jagannath, Baladev and Subadra in Radhadesh.jpg|thumb|right|250px|alt=|Subhadra, flanked by her brothers Balarama and Jagannatha . Deities of the Radhadesh temple in Belgium...

 with Arjuna
Arjuna
Arjuna in Indian mythology is the greatest warrior on earth and is one of the Pandavas, the heroes of the Hindu epic Mahābhārata. Arjuna, whose name means 'bright', 'shining', 'white' or 'silver' Arjuna (Devanagari: अर्जुन, Thai: อรชุน, Orachun, Tamil: Arjunan, Indonesian and Javanese: Harjuna,...

, by the Brahmanis, a class of female Ambalavasi
Ambalavasi
Ambalavasi is a generic name for a collection of castes among Hindus in Kerala who render temple services.-Etymology:The term Ambalavasi is derived from two Malayalam words, being Ambalam and Vasi...

s who are accommodated for the musical purposes inside the house throughout the four days of the wedding.

Following this the bride's mother goes to the house of the Manavalan personally and placing a garland around his neck formally invites him to start for the marriage pandal. At an auspicious hour, prescribed by the Kaniyan, the grooms party start from their house, the Manavalan himself mounted on an elephant or on foot. Among the Nair
Nair
Nair , also known as Nayar , refers to "not a unitary group but a named category of castes", which historically embody several castes and many subdivisions, not all of whom bore the Nair title. These people historically live in the present-day Indian state of Kerala...

s he holds in his hand a sword, symbolic of his position as a warrior.

The groom is received at the gates of the pandal by a few select female members of the girl, headed by her senior aunt by marriage, carrying a tray called the Asthamangalyam, consisting of eight articles symbolic of Mangalyam or Vedic marriage. He is then conducted to his seat in the Kathiru Mandapam wherein his feet are washed by the girl's uncle or brother.

The girl is then brought into the pandal, carried by her brothers and uncles, completely veiled like Namboodiri ladies, holding in her hand an arrow and a looking glass. She is then made to sit on the left side of the groom or in front with her back to him, each facing the east.

At the auspicious hour the groom receives the Thali or wedding locket from the Illayatu priest (in the other parts of Kerala
Kerala
or Keralam is an Indian state located on the Malabar coast of south-west India. It was created on 1 November 1956 by the States Reorganisation Act by combining various Malayalam speaking regions....

). He places it around the neck of the bride and ties a single knot while his sister ties the two other knots, in the total number of three knots. All this is done amidst music and hurraying of men and women. A song called the Amachan Pattu or the song of the maternal uncle is sung and the bride and groom are taken out of the Pandal. With reference to this, Edgar Thurston in his "Castes and Tribes of Southern India" says,
A Machampi man, generally brother to the groom, bears the newly wed bride into the Manavara, a decorated marriage chamber in the inner part of the house wherein both the bride and groom are required to stay for the next three days under religious pollution. The master of the house then distributes pan supari to the guests and for the next three days of the wedding every guest is treated to a rich feast. Then follows a massive banquet in which women are served first.

Second day

During the four days of the marriage various sports and amusements are arranged for the delectation of the guests. On the second day no great banquet is thrown, just a small feast for relatives and friends.

Third day

On the third day a feast is given to all caste members of the village who do the cooking themselves, the master of the house having to supply only the required materials. This is a gigantic business of feeding, as even the slaves, artisans and all inferior castes and poors of all religions are fed on this day. After this meal all those present gift presents to the Karnavan of the family according to his means.

On the night of this third day, the bride groom and all his friends and relations make a procession from the girl's house to that of a near friends where they are treated to a feast known as Avalteetu, consisting of beaten rice, sugar etc. The procession is accompanied by music and a vast display of fireworks and swordplay.

When the bride groom, the Manavalan returns after the function, the bride shuts herself in the Manavara and songs of entreaty known as Vathil Thura Pattus (literally open the door songs) are sung by the groom and his men to open the door. Reply songs are sung from inside by the bride and her young cousins stating that the bride suspects her husband's returning home so late. This completes the ceremonies of the third day.

Fourth day

On the fourth day a procession known as Mannu Neeru Vari Kondu Varuka (bringing of water from a neighbouring tank) is formed by the females related to the bride and groom and with great pomp and show it is conducted. On this night the female members of the bride's house make sweetmeat presents for the family of the groom. The same night the Maaran
Maaran
Maaran is the name given to the temple musicians of Travancore, Cochin and Malabar in the state of Kerala, India whose primary duty was to provide the traditional temple Sopanam music. Their position in the caste system varies from place to place in Kerala...

 removes the string tied on the wrist of the girl and groom and performs all the required purification rites, making them eligible once more to enter temples etc. The water used for this rite is the same brought during the above mentioned ceremony of bringing water from a tank.The couple then go together to the tank and bathe. Then the bride groom is dismissed with presents of money, gold ornaments, rings, earrings etc and this concludes the marriage ceremony.

Status of Kettu Kalyanam

The Kettu Kalyanam ceremony is mostly meaningless as after all these highly expensive ceremonies and rituals the bride groom returns to his house, never to meet the bride again, who, for all religious and ritual purposes, is his wife, and he her husband. Both of them later enter into actual marriage with other individuals through the simple ceremony known as Sambandham
Sambandham
Sambandham was a form of marital system primarily followed by the Nairs in what is the present-day Indian state of Kerala. This system of marriage was followed by the matriarchal castes of Kerala, though today the custom has ceased to exist...

. In some parts of Malabar immediately after the ceremony a formal divorce is constituted whereas in some other areas the groom enters into Sambandham with the girl and becomes her husband in practice, if the girl be of marriageable age. Otherwise the ceremony has no practical meaning and is strictly ritualistic. Only among the Maaran
Maaran
Maaran is the name given to the temple musicians of Travancore, Cochin and Malabar in the state of Kerala, India whose primary duty was to provide the traditional temple Sopanam music. Their position in the caste system varies from place to place in Kerala...

s there is a class called Orunul who allow their women only to marry their ritual husbands through Sambandham or else only a Brahmin
Brahmin
Brahmin Brahman, Brahma and Brahmin.Brahman, Brahmin and Brahma have different meanings. Brahman refers to the Supreme Self...

.

Anyhow the Kettu Kalyanam ceremony, in spite of its wealthy elaboration has no meaning excepting that on the death of the groom, his ritual wife must maintain the widows pollution for the required number of days and her children must mourn although they be children of another man who married their mother through Sambandham. Thus the status of 'husband' is for the man who ties the Thali to the woman through the above mentioned ceremony, though the actual husband, known as Sambandhakaran is the man who consorts with the woman through Sambandham. However no woman may have a Sambandham until she has a Thali around her neck.

Alternatives

There is no real alternative for the Kettu Kalyanam ceremony though its elaborations can be cut down for economic reasons. If the girl is from a poor family she may have her ceremony done in the house of a well to do neighbour. If even that is not possible her own mother may tie the Thali around her neck, placing a sword as substitute to the groom, in a temple.

Current status

The Kettu Kalyanam ceremony is no longer practised and has been non existent for the last hundred years or so. This is because social reformers such as Narayana Guru
Narayana Guru
Sri Nārāyana Guru , also known as Sree Nārāyana Guru Swami, was a Hindu saint, sadhuand social reformer of India. The Guru was born into an Ezhava family, in an era when people from backward communities like the Ezhavas faced much social injustices in the caste-ridden Kerala society...

, realising the meaninglessness of this economically ruinous ceremonial, strived towards doing away with it. The modern marriages of the castes practising the Kettu Kalyanam however do include some of its aspects in it.

See also

  • Nair
    Nair
    Nair , also known as Nayar , refers to "not a unitary group but a named category of castes", which historically embody several castes and many subdivisions, not all of whom bore the Nair title. These people historically live in the present-day Indian state of Kerala...

  • Kshatriya
    Kshatriya
    *For the Bollywood film of the same name see Kshatriya Kshatriya or Kashtriya, meaning warrior, is one of the four varnas in Hinduism...

  • Ezhava
    Ezhava
    The Ezhavas are a community with origins in the region presently known as Kerala. They are also known as Ilhava, Irava, Izhava and Erava in the south of the region; as Chovas, Chokons and Chogons in Central Travancore; and as Tiyyas, Thiyas and Theeyas in Malabar...

  • Maaran
    Maaran
    Maaran is the name given to the temple musicians of Travancore, Cochin and Malabar in the state of Kerala, India whose primary duty was to provide the traditional temple Sopanam music. Their position in the caste system varies from place to place in Kerala...

  • Sambandam
  • Tharavadu
    Tharavadu
    Tharavad is a system of joint family practised by people in Kerala, especially Nairs. Tharavadu was a legal entity like a Hindu Undivided Family as per Indian Income Tax laws, and was entitled to own properties. The others, like Namboothriris, Ezhavas, Christians and Muslims also now refer to...

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