Directed by Jan de Bont. Written by Michael Crichton and Anne-Marie Martin.

Dialogue

[Melissa is giving therapy to a patient over the phone.]

Melissa: She did not marry your penis. Ok, she didn't only marry your penis.

Dusty: Bill, she just missed the truck!

Rabbit: Y'know, in a severe lightning storm, you want to grab your ankles and stick your butt in the air.

Haynes: He's right. If you're gonna get hit it's the safest orifice.

Joey: Yeah, I'd like to get hit by lightning once, y'know, see what it's like.

Rabbit:God Meg you got alot of beef.Where'd you get all this beef?

Aunt Meg: Did you see my cows out front?

Rabbit: No.

Aunt Meg: Op...aaah!

[laughter from everyone]

Rabbit: Oh.

Dusty: You slaughter your own cows! Meg, nice!

Dusty: So we get this one near Daleton right?

Rabbit: Oh, god.

Dusty: And we are way to close. And Jo's got the vid on it right, she's filming it. And all of the sudden outta nowhere, this shitty lookin' green Valiant comes pulling up right in the way.

Beltzer: [points to Bill] And this loser stumbles out of the car, he's got like a bottle of Jack Daniel's in his hand...

Dusty: He is naked!

Rabbit: He is buck naked.

Beltzer: Naked!

Bill: NOT naked!

[laughter]

Bill: I was not naked!

Beltzer: [whispering into Melissa's ear] He was without apparel.

Bill: Half naked.

Dusty: Naked. Ok, so Jo's yelling at him to get out of the way, right?

[laughter]

Dusty: And he just strolls up to the twister, says 'have a drink', and he chucks the bottle into the twister, and it NEVER hits the ground. The twister caught it, and sucked it right up!

Bill: Honey, this is a tissue full of lies. See, there was another Bill, an evil Bill, and I killed him.

Joey: No, that was a good size twister. What was it, an F-3?

Bill: Solid F-2.

Milissa: See, now you've lost me again.

Bill: It's the Fujita Scale. It measures a tornado's intensity by how much it eats.

Melissa: Eats?

Bill: Destroys.

Lawrence: The one we last encountered was a strong F-2, possibly an F-3.

Beltzer: Maybe we'll see some F-4's.

Haynes: That would be sweet!

Bill: 4 is good. 4 will relocate your house fairly efficiently.

Melissa: Is there an F-5? [silence falls over the group] What would that be like?

Preacher: ...The finger of God.

[A combine has just been dropped from a tornado.]

Jo: Debris!Dusty we have Debris!

Bill: DEBRIS?

Jo: Right! Left!

Bill: Which way now?

Jo: I have no idea.

[Bill, driving a truck, has been dodging multiple combines and gone through a house.]

Bill: Maybe we should get off of this road.

Jo: :[during an argument] Can I drive?

Bill: No!

Jo: Then will you? :[the truck is about to hit a tractor]

Bill: DAMN!

Jo: Where's my truck?

[Jo's truck falls from the sky in the way of Melissa]

There it is.

Rabbit: Uh... yeah, trust me. Rabbit is good, Rabbit is wise.

Jo: :[cow flies by in the storm] Cow.

[cow flies by in the storm]

Jo: 'Nother cow.

Bill: Actually I think that was the same one.

Melissa: I gotta go Julia, we got cows.

[Aunt Meg is being loaded into an ambulance]

Jo: Is she OK?

Paramedic: We'll probably keep her overnight just to be safe.

Aunt Meg: Overnight, forget it, I'm all right.

Jo: You're going to the hospital.

Aunt Meg: OK, I'll go, but I'm gonna drive myself.

Rabbit: Honey, your car is in a tree around the corner.

Aunt Meg: OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Jo: Guys, we are NOT invading my aunt!

Taglines

• There is a Mystery.
• Adhusive.
• Unpredictable.
• Violent.
• It terrifies most Scientists.
• But for a new Greed.
• The challenge is saving lives.
• The Research is deadly.
• And the Labratory is nature itself.
• The Dark Side of Nature.
• Don't Breathe.
• Don't Look Back.
• Go for a ride & you'll never forget!
• Rabbit is good, Rabbit is wise.
• If you can hear it, it's already too late!

Cast

• Helen Hunt — Dr. Jo Harding
• Bill Paxton — Bill Harding
• Cary Elwes — Dr. Jonas Miller
• Jami Gertz — Dr. Melissa Reeves
• Philip Seymour Hoffman — Dustin 'Dusty' Davis
• Lois Smith — Meg Greene
• Alan Ruck — Robert 'Rabbit' Nurick
• Sean Whalen — Allan Sanders
• Scott Thomson — Jason 'Preacher' Rowe
• Todd Field — Tim 'Beltzer' Lewis