Directed by Norman Jewison. Written by Valerie Curtin and Barry Levinson.

Arthur Kirkland

• At this point, I would just like to say that what this committee is doing in theory is highly commendable. However, in practice, it sucks... and I'm not going to answer any more questions.

• [about Judge Rayford] This is a man bent on killing himself, it's not secret, a guard found him in his chambers once trying to hang himself! This is a man who's making valid decisions on people's lives!

• The one thing that bothered me, the one thing that stayed in my mind and I couldn't get rid of it, that haunted me, was why. Why would she lie? What was her motive for lying? If my client is innocent, she's lying. Why? Was it blackmail? No. Was it jealousy? No! Yesterday, I found out why. She doesn't have a motive. You know why? Because... she's not lying. And ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the prosecution is not going to get that man today...! no. Because I'm gonna get him! My client, the Honorable Henry T. Fleming, should go right to fucking jail! The son of a bitch is guilty!

Judge Rayford

• Sixteen years of marriage and my wife still won't eat Chinese food. It's crazy, especially since we met in a Chinese restaurant.

• [After he fires a gun in his courtroom, to stop an argument] Gentlemen, do you realize you're in a court of law? [long pause] Now, let's proceed in an orderly fashion.

Others

• Jeff McCullaugh: If everybody agrees I'm innocent, how come I'm going BACK to jail?

• Carl Travers: I haven't left the scene of the accident, I'm in it!

Dialogue

Carl Travers: I was your first, you know that, Arthur? I was your first client, you broke cherry on me.

Arthur: Now is not the time to go down memory lane, Carl.

Elderly Man: [about Arthur's grandfather] He keeps telling us you're going to make a great lawyer.

Arthur: I wish he could remember that I AM a lawyer.

Elderly Man: Sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn't, what's it matter? He's still proud of you.

Arthur: You keep talking like that and you're not going to get me in bed.

Gail: [pause] Oh yes I am. I've tackled tougher clients than you.

Arthur: Oh yeah? So that's why you went out with me, huh?

Arthur: [Arthur is visiting his client Jeff McCullaugh in jail, and sees that he has been assaulted] Jeff, what happened?

Jeff McCullaugh: Some... somebody beat me up...

Arthur: Why?

Jeff McCullaugh: I dunno, I didn't ask.

Judge Rayford: Did you ever skydive? ... Skydive? Did you ever skydive?

Arthur: No, why?

Judge Rayford: You ought to try it. You might learn something. You know, I was skydiving once and my main chute didn't open. I pulled my reserve which didn't open either. There I was, plunging to the Earth. Just as I hit the tree tops, I discovered the meaning of life.

Arthur: Which is?

Judge Rayford: It sucks, Arthur! It really sucks!

Officer Leary: I told him to move on, but he continued to use profanity and he refused to leave the premises.

Judge Rayford: What sort of profanity?

Officer Leary: You know, the normal kind.

Judge Rayford: Officer Leary, we've all heard these words before, now for the record what did he say?

Officer Leary: [uncomfortably] He used..."fuck" a lot.

[quiet laughter from the gallery]

Officer Leary: ..."piss on you"...

[more laughter]

Officer Leary: ...then said he was gonna..."bung-hole the short order chef"..."cream on the waitress"...

[more laughter]

Officer Leary: ...stuff like that, Your Honor.

Dapper Defendant: There's a very good reason for all of that, Your Honor.

Judge Rayford: Oh? What is that?

Dapper Defendant: I'm a diabetic.

[loud laughter from the gallery]

Judge Rayford: I fail to see the connection. I've never heard of diabetes causing foul language!

Dapper Defendant: That's because you're a douchebag.

[entire courtroom erupts into laughter, including Officer Leary before he catches himself and forces a poker face]

Arnie: [In Arthur's place Arnie let slip corrections required in Ralph Agee's case, resulting in his arrest when he was supposed to get probation] If he's not in jail this week, he'll be there next week! Appeal it!

Arthur: [crying] I CAN'T APPEAL IT, HE'S DEAD! HE'S DEAD! HALF HOUR AFTER THEY PUT HIM IN THE LOCKUP, HE HANGED HIMSELF!

Elderly Man: Whoa! Where's your teeth?

Arthur: What'd you do with your teeth, Grandpa?

Sam Kirkland: Did I have teeth the last time you visited me?

Elderly Man: Of course you had teeth, you had teeth this morning!

Arthur: [trying to get out of an invitation by the Judge to fly with him] Why don't you take your wife?

Judge Rayford: Ha! The last thing we did together was get married!

Arthur: [in the judge's helicopter] Where are we going?

Judge Rayford: You wanna go someplace in particular?

Arthur: No. Down, I would prefer to go down...

Arthur: That man is guilty! that man, there, that man is a slime! he is a slime! If he's supposed to go free, then something really wrong is goin' on here!

Judge Fleming: Mr. Kirkland you are out of order!

Arthur: You're out of order! You're out of order! The whole trial is out of order! They're out of order! That man, that sick, crazy, depraved man, raped and beat that woman there, and he'd like to do it again, he told me so! It's just a show! It's a show! It's "Let's Make A Deal"! "Let's Make A Deal"! Hey Frank, you wanna "Make A Deal"? I got an insane judge who likes to beat the shit out of women! Whaddya wanna gimme Frank, 3 weeks probation?

Frank Bowers: DAMMIT!

Arthur: [to Judge Fleming] You, you sonofabitch, you! You're supposed to STAND for somethin'! You're supposed to protect people! But instead you fucking murder them!

[dragged out of court by bailiffs]

Arthur: You killed McCullough! You killed him! Hold it! Hold it! I just completed my opening statement!

Cast

• Al Pacino - Arthur Kirkland
• Jack Warden - Judge Francis Rayford
• John Forsythe - Judge Henry T. Fleming
• Lee Strasberg - Sam Kirkland
• Jeffrey Tambor - Jay Porter
• Christine Lahti - Gail Packer
• Sam Levene - Arnie
• Robert Christian - Ralph Agee
• Thomas Waites - Jeff McCullaugh
• Larry Bryggman - Warren Fresnell
• Dominic Chianese - Carl Travers
• Craig T. Nelson - Frank Bowers