'Toupee' is a song written by Colin Lane

Colin Lane

Colin Stuart Lane is a comedian and actor, best known for being one-half of former comedy duo, Lano and Woodley.-Lano and Woodley:...

 and Frank Woodley

Frank Woodley

Frank Woodley is an Australian comedian who is best known for his work alongside Colin Lane as part of the comedic duo, Lano and Woodley. The two performed together for almost 20 years in live shows, a television series and an album of comedic songs, before deciding to pursue individual careers...

 of the successful Australia

Australia

Australia , officially the Commonwealth of Australia, is a country in the Southern Hemisphere comprising the mainland of the Australian continent, the island of Tasmania, and numerous smaller islands in the Indian and Pacific Oceans. It is the world's sixth-largest country by total area...

n comedy

Comedy

Comedy , as a popular meaning, is any humorous discourse or work generally intended to amuse by creating laughter, especially in television, film, and stand-up comedy. This must be carefully distinguished from its academic definition, namely the comic theatre, whose Western origins are found in...

 duo Lano and Woodley

Lano and Woodley

Lano and Woodley were one of Australia's most successful Australian comedy duos of the 1990s and 2000s. They are perhaps most famous for their stand-up comedy and slapstick theatre, as well as their television show The Adventures of Lano and Woodley, which aired on the ABC network in 1997 and...

. The song is about a man who owns a toupee

Toupee

A toupée is a hairpiece or partial wig of natural or synthetic hair worn to cover partial baldness or for theatrical purposes. While toupées and hairpieces are typically associated with male wearers, some women also use hairpieces to lengthen existing hair, or cover partially exposed scalp...

, and who is describing all the things he is able to use it for. Some of the uses include a pot scourer, a fake beard, as an oven mit and for storing pyjamas. The song was released on their live 2005 album, Lano & Woodley Sing Songs

Lano & Woodley Sing Songs

Lano & Woodley Sing Songs is the live 2005 album by the Australian comedy duo, Lano & Woodley.The album was recorded at a show the pair did in August 2005 at the HIFI Bar in Melbourne, and features many visual jokes that the listener is unable to identify, which was joked at several times during...

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