The term
covert incest (also known as
emotional incest or
psychic incest) is used by some
mental healthMental health is a term used to describe either a level of cognitive or emotional well-being or an absence of a mental disorder. From perspectives of the discipline of positive psychology or holism mental health may include an individual's ability to enjoy life and procure a balance between life...
professionals to describe a relationship between parents and children that is sexualized and expects a child to fulfill adult emotional roles, though without actual
incestIncest is any sexual activity between close relatives irrespective of the ages of the participants and irrespective of their consent, that is illegal or socially taboo. The type of sexual activity and the nature of the relationship between persons that constitutes a breach of law or social taboo...
. Proponents of the concept describe the relationships as harmful and one-sided, and similar to a relationship between adult
sexual partnerA sexual partner is a person with whom one engages in sex acts. Note that it is possible to have a sexual partner without having an intimate relationship or even an acquaintanceship with that person; viz., casual sex or sex with a prostitute....
s but without the type of physical contact that would be considered as
child sexual abuseChild sexual abuse is a form of child abuse in which an adult or older adolescent abuses a child for sexual stimulation. Forms of CSA include asking or pressuring a child to engage in sexual activities , indecent exposure of the genitals to a child, displaying pornography to a child, actual sexual...
, and describe its effects as similar to, though less severe, than that of actual incest.
The term
covert incest (also known as
emotional incest or
psychic incest) is used by some
mental healthMental health is a term used to describe either a level of cognitive or emotional well-being or an absence of a mental disorder. From perspectives of the discipline of positive psychology or holism mental health may include an individual's ability to enjoy life and procure a balance between life...
professionals to describe a relationship between parents and children that is sexualized and expects a child to fulfill adult emotional roles, though without actual
incestIncest is any sexual activity between close relatives irrespective of the ages of the participants and irrespective of their consent, that is illegal or socially taboo. The type of sexual activity and the nature of the relationship between persons that constitutes a breach of law or social taboo...
. Proponents of the concept describe the relationships as harmful and one-sided, and similar to a relationship between adult
sexual partnerA sexual partner is a person with whom one engages in sex acts. Note that it is possible to have a sexual partner without having an intimate relationship or even an acquaintanceship with that person; viz., casual sex or sex with a prostitute....
s but without the type of physical contact that would be considered as
child sexual abuseChild sexual abuse is a form of child abuse in which an adult or older adolescent abuses a child for sexual stimulation. Forms of CSA include asking or pressuring a child to engage in sexual activities , indecent exposure of the genitals to a child, displaying pornography to a child, actual sexual...
, and describe its effects as similar to, though less severe, than that of actual incest. The concept has been criticized as an overly broad set of criteria that excessively expands the definition of child sexual abuse. Aspects of the concept have also been criticized for contradicting
experimental dataData produced by an experimental or quasi-experimental design. In clinical researchany data produced as a result of clinical trial.Experimental data may be qualitative or quantitative, each being appropriate for different investigations....
.
Description
Covert incest refers to a form of
emotional abusePsychological abuse, also referred to as emotional abuse, is a form of abuse characterized by a person subjecting or exposing another to behavior that is psychologically harmful...
in which the relationship between a parent and a child is inappropriately sexualized without actual
sexual contactIncest is any sexual activity between close relatives irrespective of the ages of the participants and irrespective of their consent, that is illegal or socially taboo. The type of sexual activity and the nature of the relationship between persons that constitutes a breach of law or social taboo...
.
Substance abuseAlthough the term substance can refer to any physical matter, substance abuse has come to refer to the overindulgence in and dependence of a drug or other chemical leading to effects that are detrimental to the individual's physical and mental health, or the welfare of others.]The disorder is...
is thought to be associated with covert incest. The effects of covert incest are thought to mimic actual incest though to a lesser degree, and Kenneth Adams, who originated the concept, describes the victims having anger or guilt towards parents and issues with
self-esteemSelf-esteem is a term used in psychology to reflect a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth.Self-esteem encompasses beliefs and emotions...
, addiction and sexual and emotional intimacy.
Covert incest was defined in the 1980s as an
emotionally abusivePsychological abuse, also referred to as emotional abuse, is a form of abuse characterized by a person subjecting or exposing another to behavior that is psychologically harmful...
relationship between a parent (or step-parent) and child that does not involve
incestIncest is any sexual activity between close relatives irrespective of the ages of the participants and irrespective of their consent, that is illegal or socially taboo. The type of sexual activity and the nature of the relationship between persons that constitutes a breach of law or social taboo...
or
sexual intercourseSexual intercourse, also known as copulation or coitus, commonly refers to the act in which the male reproductive organ enters the female reproductive tract. The two entities may be of opposite sexes or not, or they may be hermaphroditic, as is the case with snails...
, though it involves similar interpersonal dynamics as a relationship between
sexual partnerA sexual partner is a person with whom one engages in sex acts. Note that it is possible to have a sexual partner without having an intimate relationship or even an acquaintanceship with that person; viz., casual sex or sex with a prostitute....
s; it has also been described as a parent responding to a child's love with adult sexuality. Problems between parents often facilitate covert incest; as the parents distance themselves from each other both physically and emotionally, one parent may begin focusing on his/her child. The child becomes the surrogate partner and source of emotional support for the parent. The abusing parent may also be afraid or unable to meet their needs through a relationship with another adult. Alcoholism and other substance addictions are also associated with the occurrence of covert incest.
Covert incest occurs when a parent is unable or unwilling to maintain a relationship with another adult and forces the emotional role of a
spouseMarriage is a social union or legal contract between individuals that creates kinship. It is an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged by a variety of ways, depending on the culture or demographic...
onto their child instead. The child's needs are ignored and instead the relationship exists solely to meet the needs of the parent and the adult may not be aware of the issues created by their actions.
Jungian analystAnalytical psychology is the school of psychology originating from the ideas of Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung, and then advanced by his students and other thinkers who followed in his tradition. It is distinct from Freudian psychoanalysis but also has a number of similarities...
and author
Marion WoodmanMarion Woodman, born August 15, 1928, is a Canadian mythopoetic author and women's movement figure. She is a Jungian analyst trained at the Jung Institute in Zürich, Switzerland...
describes psychic incest as "unboundaried bonding" in which the parent or parents use the child to as a mirror to support their needs, rather than mirroring the child in support of the child's emotional development. Woodman considers psychic incest to damage the internal experience of the "parental
complexesIn psychology a complex is a group of mental factors that are unconsciously associated by the individual with a particular subject or connected by a recognizable theme and influence the individual's attitude and behavior. Their existence is widely agreed upon in the area of depth psychology at...
," described in Jungian analysis as a combination of actual interaction with the parents and the innate mother and father archetypes; according to Woodman, when these are damaged due to covert incest, an affected individual can experience distress in their personal relationships and sexual relationships in particular.
Criticisms
Critics of covert incest have claimed that the concept dramatically loosens the definition of incest, making
child abuseChild abuse is the physical and/or psychological/emotional mistreatment of children. In the United States, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention define child maltreatment as any act or series of acts or commission or omission by a parent or other caregiver that results in harm, potential...
seem more prevalent than it actually is. An aspect of covert incest tested empirically (the exposure of children to parental nudity and sexuality) contradicted the idea that there was any physical or psychological damage or increase in criminality.