Bestsellers Guaranteed was a collection of short fiction by Joe R. Lansdale

Joe R. Lansdale

Joe R. Lansdale is an American author and martial-arts expert. He has written novels and stories in many genres, including Western, horror, science fiction, mystery, and suspense...

, published in May 1993.

It contains:

• "Bestsellers Guaranteed" (originally published in Espionage Magazine, May 1985)
• "Bob the Dinosaur Goes to Disneyland" (originally published in Midnight Graffiti, Fall 1989)
• "By the Hair of the Head" (originally published in Shadows #6, ed. Charles L. Grant
  Charles L. Grant
  Charles Lewis Grant was a novelist and short story writer specializing in what he called "dark fantasy" and "quiet horror." He also wrote under the pseudonyms of Geoffrey Marsh, Lionel Fenn, Simon Lake, Felicia Andrews, and Deborah Lewis.Grant won a World Fantasy Award for his novella collection...
  
   (1983))
• "Chompers" (originally published in Twilight Zone
  Twilight zone
  -Television series and spinoffs:*The Twilight Zone, the anthology television series and its franchise:**The Twilight Zone , the 1959–1964 original television series***Twilight Zone: The Movie, a 1983 film based on the original series...
  
   Magazine, July 1982)
• "Dog, Cat, and Baby" (originally published in Masques #2, ed. J. N. Williamson
  J. N. Williamson
  Gerald Neal Williamson wrote and edited horror stories under the name J. N. Williamson.Born in Indianapolis, IN he graduated from Shortridge High School. He studied journalism at Butler University. He published his first novel in 1979 and went on to publish more than 40 novels and 150 short...
  
   (1987))
• "The Dump" (originally published in Twilight Zone
  Twilight zone
  -Television series and spinoffs:*The Twilight Zone, the anthology television series and its franchise:**The Twilight Zone , the 1959–1964 original television series***Twilight Zone: The Movie, a 1983 film based on the original series...
  
   Magazine, July 1981)
• "The Events Concerning a Nude Fold-Out Found in a Harlequin Romance" (winner of Bram Stoker Award
  Bram Stoker Award
  The Bram Stoker Award is a recognition presented by the Horror Writers Association for "superior achievement" in horror writing. The awards have been presented annually since 1987, and the winners are selected by ballot of the Active members of the HWA...
  
  ) (originally published in Dark at Heart, ed. Joe & Karen Lansdale
  Joe R. Lansdale
  Joe R. Lansdale is an American author and martial-arts expert. He has written novels and stories in many genres, including Western, horror, science fiction, mystery, and suspense...
  
   (1992))
• "The Fat Man" (originally published in The Horror Show, Jan 1987)
• "God of the Razor" (heavily reworked excerpt of The Nightrunners) (originally published in Grue #5, 1987)
• "The Job" (originally published in Razored Saddles, ed. Joe R. Lansdale
  Joe R. Lansdale
  Joe R. Lansdale is an American author and martial-arts expert. He has written novels and stories in many genres, including Western, horror, science fiction, mystery, and suspense...
  
   & Pat LoBrutto
  Pat LoBrutto
  Patrick LoBrutto is an editor, author, anthologist and a past recipient of the World Fantasy Award for editing in 1986. He has worked for Ace Books, Bantam Books, Doubleday, M. Evans, Stealth Press and Kensington among other publishing houses...
  
   (1989))
• "My Dead Dog Bobby" (originally published in The Horror Show, Summer 1987)
• "Not From Detroit" (originally published in Midnight Graffiti, Fall 1988)
• "On a Dark October" (originally published in The Horror Show, Spring 1984)
• "Pentecostal Punk Rock" (originally published in Deathrealm, Summer 1989)
• "The Shaggy House" (originally published in The Horror Show, Fall 1986)
• "The White Rabbit" (originally published in The Arbor House Necropolis, ed. Bill Pronzini
  Bill Pronzini
  Bill Pronzini is an American writer of detective fiction. He is also an active anthologist, having compiled more than 100 collections, most of which focus on mystery, western, and science fiction short stories....
  
   (1981))

All of the stories (except for "Events Concerning ...") in this collection were printed the previous year in Stories by Mama Lansdale's Youngest Boy

Stories by Mama Lansdale's Youngest Boy

Stories by Mama Lansdale's Youngest Boy is an early compilation of short work by Joe R. Lansdale, published in 1991. It was initially published as issue number 18 of Author's Choice Monthly.It contains:...

, but this collection had a larger print run. These collections are the only collections which include "Pentecostal Punk Rock", and "The White Rabbit" has only subsequently been printed in the extremely limited edition A Little Green Book of Monster Stories

A Little Green Book of Monster Stories

A Little Green Book of Monster Stories was a collection of short stories written by Joe R. Lansdale, published by Borderlands Press as part of their "Little Book" series...

.