Michael McDonald

• "The smooth grooves of this song will make it to at least Number 2."

• "You wanna come over? James Ingram and I are getting wasted and writing smooth music."

• "What did you say? Yah mo' be there?"

Kenny Loggins

• "You're drowning in the past, Mike. But I've got your life vest right here: it's called the 80's, and it's gonna be around forever!"

• "Fuck you! You're not Koko. Koko's dead as shit."

Hollywood Steve

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You caught me relaxing in my music nook."

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You caught me basting some lamb shanks."

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You caught me taking a shit."

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You caught me attending the funeral of a loved one."

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You've caught me murdering a homeless woman."

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You've caught me making love."

• "Hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. I'm ready for you this time."

• "Oh, hi, I'm Hollywood Steve. You've caught me becoming estranged from my spouse."

Gino Balzarelli

• "So what'll it be, Mikey? Are you gonna take it up the ass? Or take it to the streets!"

John Oates

• "Fuck you, Loggins! Hall and I will not stand idly by while you California vagina sailors stab the American airwaves in the balls with your shit ... music!"

• "Fame... Fortune... Fagina."

• "Get your dick out of your heart! Do you even know what the kids on the street are listening to? Disco, motherfucker!"

Steve Porcaro

• "Alright Toto, I've done some research, and I've found out that the root chakra is my taint. That means she really wants to fuck me."

Dr. Dre

• "Come on Amnesia Jack, you're a Doobie Brother... Michael McDonald, one smooth motherfucker!"

• "This is gonna be some good-ass banana bread."