Pilot [1.1]

Zack: Well, this sure is a week of firsts. My first week of college, first Saturday night alone, first time I didn’t get the girl. Well, since there’s nothing else to do, may as well add one more first to the list. First weekend night I’m ever...going to study. [starts to read] Naah, I don’t think so! [throws the book over his shoulder]

Danielle: Hey Screech, we should go, the movie starts in ten minutes.

Alex: Yeah, and we have to get there early because I can’t see in the first ten rows, and I really can’t hear in the last ten rows, you know where’s good? The middle is good, on that right side, you just...

Danielle: Alex! By the time you stop talking the movie will be in video stores!

Zack: How much does this job pay again?

Slater: Four-fifty an hour.

Zack: Ah, great. At this rate, I’ll have it paid off by spring break...of my junior year.

Screech: Nothing. He made me promise I wouldn’t tell you. Go ahead, torture me, I wouldn’t tell you even if you poured molten lava down my pants!

Zack: Screech, you’re about two seconds away from a noogie.

Screech: Okay, okay, I give!

Zack: When can I buy you dinner?

Leslie: Right now! [she hands him the check] Thanks! I had a great time. [she leaves]

Screech: So, you’re kind of like our mom!

Mike: Your mom? Did your mom play linebacker for the 49ers?

Screech: Well she tried to, but she was cut.

Mike: Hi, I’m Mr. Rogers.

Screech: Oh, I watch you every morning. You’re a lot bigger in person.

Screech: I know, I know, I was supposed to be in 318, but I pulled some strings. Aren’t you proud of me, Zack?

Zack: Uh-huh.

Screech: The three musketeers, back together again!

Slater: Well, at least we’ll never run out of nasal spray.

Leslie: What are you doing on my bed?

Zack: Your bed? Oh, this is one lucky piece of furniture.