Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets Quotations

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets is the second book in the Harry Potter series, written by J.K. Rowling. It was first published in 1998.

Chapter 1: The Worst Birthday

'Jiggery Pokery!' said Harry in a fierce voice, ' Hocus Pocus-Squiggly Wiggly! 'MUUUUUUM!' howled Dudley, 'MUUUUM! He's doing you know what!
- p. 9

Chapter 2: Dobby's Warning

Bad Dobby! Bad Dobby!
- p. 14
Just our nephew-very disturbed-meeting strangers upsets him, so we kept him upstairs...
- p. 20

Chapter 3: The Burrow

Beds empty! No note! Car gone-could have crashed-out of my mind with worry-did you care?-never, as long as I've lived-you wait until your father gets home, we never had trouble like this from Bill or Charlie or Percy-
- p. 33
YOU COULD DO WITH TAKING A LEAF OUT OF PERCY'S BOOK!
- p. 33
'Your sons flew that car to Harry's house and back last night!' shouted Mrs Weasley. 'What have you got to say about that, eh?'
'Did you really?' said Mr Weasley eagerly. 'Did it go all right? I—I mean,' he faltered, 'that—that was very wrong, boys – very wrong indeed …'
- p. 39
This is the best house I've ever been in.
- p. 41

Chapter 4: At Flourish and Blotts

D-Dia-gon Alley
- p. 48
Nice big smile, Harry. Together, you and I are worth the front page.
- p. 60

Chapter 5: The Whomping Willow

'Maybe he's ill!' said Ron hopefully.
'Maybe he's left,' said Harry, 'because he missed out on the Defence Against the Dark Arts job again!'
'Or he might have been sacked!' said Ron enthusiastically. 'I mean, everyone hates him –"
'Or maybe,' said a very cold voice right behind them, 'he's waiting to hear why you two didn't arrive on the school train.'
- pp. 77-78
- Harry and Ron's interrupted discussion on the absence of Snape at the Welcoming Feast

'Most unfortunately, you are not in my house and the decision to expel you does not rest with me. I shall go and fetch the people who do have that happy power. You will wait here.'
- p. 79
- Severus Snape speaking to Ron Weasley and Harry Potter

Chapter 6: Gilderoy Lockhart

-"You'd better hope Creevy doesn't meet Ginny, or they'll be starting a Harry Potter fan club.'

'Shut up,' snapped Harry. The last thing he needed was for Lockhart to hear the phrase 'Harry Potter fan club.'"
- "'Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most-Charming-Smile Award -- but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!'"

- Page 99, American edition
"'I must ask you not to scream,' said Lockhart in a low voice. 'It might provoke them.'

As the whole class held its breath, Lockhart whipped off the cover.

'Yes,' he said dramatically. Freshly caught Cornish pixies."

-Page 101, American edition

Chapter 7: Mudbloods and Murmurs

'At least no one on Gryffindor team had to buy their way in,' said Hermione sharply. 'They got in on pure talent.'
The smug look on Malfoy's face flickered.
'No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudblood,' he spat.
- p. 112

Chapter 8: The Deathday Party

"D'you think I don't know what people call me behind my back? Fat Myrtle! Ugly Myrtle! Miserable, moaning, moping Myrtle!'

'You've forgotten pimply,' Peeves hissed in her ear.

... Pimply! Pimply!"

- Page 135, American edition

Chapter 9: The Writing on the Wall

'I'll make it,' Lockhart butted in. 'I must have done it a hundred times, I could whip up a Mandrake Restorative Draught in my sleep –'
'Excuse me,' said Snape icily, 'but I believe I am the Potions master at this school.'
- p. 144

'Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world.'
- p. 145

Chapter 10: The Rogue Bludger

'Lockhart'll sign anything if it stands still long enough.'
- p. 164

Chapter 11: The Dueling Club

"That was a Disarming Charm -- as you see, I've lost my wand -- ah, thank you, Miss Brown -- yes, an excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don't mind my saying so, it was very obvious what you were about to do. If I had wanted to stop you, it would have been only too easy -- however, I felt it would be instructive to let them see...'

Snape was looking murderous."

-Page 191, American edition
"Lockhart cuffed Harry merrily on the shoulder.

'Just do what I did, Harry!'

'What, drop my wand?'"

-Page 194, American edition

Chapter 12: The Polyjuice Potion

'Azkaban – the wizard prison, Goyle,' said Malfoy, looking at him in disbelief. 'Honestly, if you were any slower, you'd be going backwards.'
- p. 224

Chapter 13: The Very Secret Diary

His eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad,
His hair is as dark as a blackboard.
I wish he was mine, he's really divine,
The hero who conquered the Dark Lord.
- p. 238
- The singing Valentine Harry receives.

Chapter 14: Cornelius Fudge

"But that's very important!' said Hermione, shocked. [about Defense Against the Dark Arts]

'Not the way Lockhart teaches it,' said Ron. 'I haven't learned anything from him except not to set pixies loose.'"

-page 251, American edition
"'That'd be a cheerful visit,' said Ron. 'Hello, Hagrid. Tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?'"

-Page 250, American edition

Chapter 15: Aragog

'I will only truly have left this school when none here are loyal to me … Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.'
- p. 266
- Dumbledore's final words to the school, as remembered by Harry

Chapter 16: The Chamber of Secrets

Ron looked as though he'd just been told he had to go and live in the Forbidden Forest.
- p. 284
- On being told he will have to take exams with a broken wand

'The first words out of those poor Petrified people's mouths will be, "It was Hagrid." Frankly, I'm astounded Professor McGonagall thinks all these security measures are necessary.'
- p.287
- Spoken by Gilderoy Lockhart

'It’s not all book signings and publicity photos, you know. You want fame, you have to be prepared for a long hard slog.'
- p. 298

Chapter 17: The Heir of Slytherin

'Haven't I already told you,' said Riddle, 'that killing Mudbloods doesn't matter to me any more? For many months now, my new target has been—you.'
- p. 312
- Tom Riddle speaking to Harry Potter

'Voldemort,' said Riddle softly, 'is my past, present, and future.…'
- p. 313

Chapter 18: Dobby's Reward

'Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain.'
- p. 329

'I seem to remember telling you both that I would have to expel you if you broke any more school rules,' said Dumbledore.
Ron opened his mouth wide in horror.
'Which only goes to show that the best of us must sometimes eat our words,' Dumbledore went on, smiling.
- p. 330-1

'Exactly,' said Dumbledore, beaming once more. 'Which makes you very different from Tom Riddle. It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.'
- p. 333

Harry Potter

She's bored. She's used to flying around outside. If I could let her out at night-.
- p. 1
You've forgotten the magic word.
- p. 2
I meant 'please'! I didn't mean-
- p. 2
But I-
- p. 2
I just-
- p. 2
All right, all right...
- p. 3
I'll be in my bedroom, making no noise and pretending I'm not there.
- p. 6

Ron Weasley

"Hello, Hagrid. Tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?"
- p. 250

Hermione Granger

"At least no one on Gryffindor team had to buy their way in. (...) They got in on pure talent."
- To Draco Malfoy, upon finding out he had joined the Slytherin Quidditch team.
- p. 112

Molly Weasley

Beds empty! No note! Car gone-could have crashed-out of my mind with worry-did you care?-never, as long as I've lived-you wait until your father gets home, we never had trouble like this from Bill or Charlie or Percy-

The Dursleys

Third time this week! If you can't control that owl, it'll have to go!
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 1
Do I look stupid? I know what'll happen if that owl's let out.
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 1
I want more bacon.
- Spoken by Dudley Dursley
- p. 2
There’s more in the frying pan, sweetums. We must build you up while we’ve got the chance….I don’t like the sound of that school food….
- Spoken by Petunia Dursley
- p. 2
Nonsense, Petunia, I never went hungry when I was at Smeltings. Dudley gets enough, don't you, son?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 2
Pass the frying pan.
- Spoken by Dudley Dursley
- p. 2
WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT SAYING THE 'M' WORD IN OUR HOUSE?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 2
HOW DARE YOU THREATEN DUDLEY!
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 2
I WARNED YOU! I WILL NOT TOLERATE MENTION OF YOUR ABNORMALITY UNDER THIS ROOF!
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 2
Now, as we all know, today is a very important day.
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 5
This could well be the day I make the biggest deal of my career.
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 5
I think we should run through the schedule one more time. We should all be in position at eight o'clock. Petunia, you will be-
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 5
In the lounge, waiting to welcome them graciously to our home.
- Spoken by Petunia Dursley
- p. 5
Good, good. And Dudley?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 5
I'll be waiting to open the door. May I take your coats, Mr. and Mrs. Mason?
- Spoken by Dudley Dusrley
- p. 5
They'll love him.
- Spoken by Petunia Dursley
- p. 5
Excellent, Dudley. And you?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 6
Exactly. I will lead them into the lounge, introduce you, Petunia, and pour them drinks. At eight-fifteen-
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 6
I'll announce dinner.
- Spoken by Petunia Dursley
- p. 6
And Dudley, you'll say-
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 6
May I take you through to the dining room, Mrs. Mason?
- Spoken by Dudley Dursley
- p. 6
My perfect little gentleman!
- Spoken by Petunia Dursley
- p. 6
And you?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 6
Precisely. Now, we should aim to get in a few good compliments at dinner. Petunia, any ideas?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 6
Vernon tells me you're a wonderful golfer, Mr. Mason....Do tell me where you got your dress, Mrs. Mason...
- Spoken by Petunia Dursley
- p. 6
Perfect...Dudley?
- Spoken by Vernon Dursley
- p. 6
How about-'We had to write an essay about our hero at school, Mr. Mason, and I wrote about you.

Albus Dumbledore

'I will only truly have left this school when none here are loyal to me … Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.'
- p. 266
"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."
- p. 333

Draco Malfoy

"Azkaban – the wizard prison, Goyle," said Malfoy. (...) "Honestly, if you were any slower, you'd be going backwards."
- p. 224

Tom Riddle

"Haven't I already told you," said Riddle, "that killing Mudbloods doesn't matter to me any more? For many months now, my new target has been—you."
- said to Harry Potter
- p. 312
"Voldemort," said Riddle softly, "is my past, present, and future.…"
- p. 313

Moaning Myrtle

"D'you think I don't know what people call me behind my back? Fat Myrtle! Ugly Myrtle! Miserable, moaning, moping Myrtle!'
- p. 135