Memorable Quotes from Cabaret the Broadway musical

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[singing]

'When I had a man, my figure was dumpy and fat...So what?' -- Fraulein Schneider

This is a censored lyric used on the original cast album. The correct completed lyric is:

When I had a man, my figure was boyish and flat, so what?

Through all of our years he was so disappointed in that, so what?

Now I have what he missed and my bosom is full,

But he lies in a churchyard plot.

If it wasn't to be that he ever would see the abundance of me,

So what? http://www.libretto.musicals.ru/text.php?textid=529&language=1

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[singing]

'You can tell my papa, that's alright, cause he comes in here every night, but don't tell Mama what you saw!' -- Sally Bowles

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'I used to pretend I was someone quite mysterious and fascinating. Then I grew up and realized I was mysterious and fascinating' --Sally Bowles

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[on Rosie]
'Rosie is so called because of the color of her cheeks!' [slaps Rosie's bottom] --Emcee

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[on Lulu]
'Oh, you like Lulu, huh? Yeah? Well too bad! So does Rosie!' --Emcee

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[on Frenchie]
'You know, I like to order Frenchie on her side. On your side, FRENCHIE! [Frenchie lays down on her side and pats her private parts]...Just kidding.' --Emcee

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[on Texas]
'Yes, Texas is from AMERICA! Mmmhmm. But she's a very cunning linguist!' --Emcee

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[on Fritzie]
[Fritzie is humping a pole] 'Oh, Fritzie! Would you stop that? Already this week we have lost two waiters, a table, and three bottles of champagne up there like this!' --Emcee

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[on Helga]
'Helga is the baby. I am like a father to her! So when she's bad... I spank her. And she's very very very very very very bad!' [spanks her on each 'very'] --Emcee

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[singing]
'Beedle dee dee dee! Two Ladies!' -- Emcee, Lulu, Bobby

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'At last, someone who cares if I am foolish!' -- Herr Schultz

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[singing]
'Oh Fatherland, Fatherland, show us the sign. Your children have waited to see! The morning will come when the world is mine! Tomorrow belongs to ME!' -- Fraulein Kost, Herr Ludwig, the Company

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[Fraulein Kost has been caught sneaking sailors out of her room]
'All day, sailors in, out, in, out. God only knows what the neighbors think I run--a BATTLESHIP?' --Fraulein Schneider

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[Herr Schultz has been caught coming out of Schneider's room]
'Good evening, Fraulein Schneider. I see we have been busy today, ja?' --Fraulein Kost

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[on Schultz]
'He is NOT a German!' --Herr Ludwig