The Rehearsal (play)
Encyclopedia
The Rehearsal was a satirical
play aimed specifically at John Dryden
and generally at the sententious and overly ambitious theatre of the Restoration tragedy
. The play was staged in 1671
and published anonymously in 1672
, but it is certainly by George Villiers, 2nd Duke of Buckingham
and others. Several people have been suggested as collaborators, including Samuel Butler of Hudibras
fame, Martin Clifford
, and Thomas Sprat
, a Royal Society
founder and later Bishop of Rochester
.
The play concerns a playwright
named Bayes attempting to stage a play. The play he is going to put on is made up almost entirely of excerpts of existing heroic drama
s. The name "Bayes" indicates the poet laureate
. The previous poet laureate had been William Davenant
, and Davenant did stage spectacles and plays with exceptionally bombastic speeches from the heroes (e.g. The Siege of Rhodes). However, the poet laureate at the time of the play was Dryden, and most of the excerpts in the play-within-a-play are liftings from Dryden. In particular, Dryden's The Conquest of Granada
, which had been his most popular play (and the one whose preface had defined "heroic drama"), is the play Buckingham parodies. Dryden had written other heroic drama aside from The Conquest of Granada. In fact, he had been so prolific in that vein that Martin Clifford accused him of "stealing from himself." The reason that The Conquest of Granada was such a target, however, is the Preface to the printed version of The Conquest of Granada. There, Dryden scolds his fellow dramatists for having immoral heroes and low sentiments, and he proposes a new type of theater, the heroic drama
. Buckingham's play is, in a sense, the old theater biting him back. In The Rehearsal, a director/author attempts to put on a new play, and he lectures his actors and critics with impossible and absurd instructions on the importance of what they are doing.
The Rehearsal infuriated Dryden, and it is not possible to see the satire without some political cause or effect. (Dryden would not forget the satire, and he made Buckingham into the figure of Zimri
in his Absalom and Achitophel
.) However, for readers and viewers what was most delightful was the way that Buckingham effectively punctures the puffed up bombast of Dryden's plays. By taking Dryden's own words out of context and pasting them together, Buckingham disrupts whatever emotions that might have gone with them originally and exposes their inherent absurdity.
The play is credited with putting an end to heroic drama, but, in the long run, it did not. If "heroic drama" is understood only as the writings of Dryden in an heroic vein, then perhaps The Rehearsal was a success. Dryden was unable or unwilling to pursue heroic drama for long after The Rehearsal came out. Whether The Rehearsal or the she-tragedy
made popular by the acting of Elizabeth Barry
did it, there was a turn away from the Classical heroes of Dryden's heroic drama. However, new plays with exaggerated heroes who mouth impossibly high-sounding moral sentiments and accomplish impossibly extravagant actions continued to be written through to the 1740s (see, for example, Henry Carey
's Chrononhotonthologos
). In fact, the trend toward absurdly lofty bombast and sentiment was so strong that Richard Brinsley Sheridan
reworked The Rehearsal for his play, The Critic
(1779
), where the target was the inflated importance and prose of theater criticism. To some degree, the parodic
form of a play-within-a-play goes back to Shakespeare's
satire of pantomime plays in A Midsummer Night's Dream
and forward to the contemporary Mel Brooks
play, The Producers.
Eighteenth-century editions of The Rehearsal contained a Key that identified the Restoration plays to which Buckingham and his collaborators allude in their work. The Key was originally attributed to Buckingham himself, but is actually the work of Morphew Briscoe. Briscoe's Key contains some accurate information, but also has deficiencies. Later commentators have worked to improve upon it.
MEN
Bayes
Johnson
Smith
Two Kings of Brentford
Prince Pretty-man
Prince Volscius
Gentleman Usher
Physician
Drawcansir
General
Lieutenant General
Cordelio
Tom Thimble
Fisherman
Sun
Thunder
Players
Soldiers
Two Heralds
Four Cardinals
Mayor
Judges
Sergeants at Arms
WOMEN
Amaryllis
Cloris
Parthenope
Pallas
Lightning
Moon
Earth
Attendants of Men and Women.
When the three men arrive at the rehearsal stage, the actors are seen struggling to understand how they should portray their roles. Bayes continually intervenes to explain what’s going on in the play to Smith and Johnson and also to direct the players.
Because it goes in many directions, Smith constantly asks Bayes about the plot of the play, in particular the interchangeable prologue and epilogue. However, Bayes retorts by saying Smith doesn’t understand because he’s been in the country for too long. Johnson spurs Bayes on, because he wants to see the foolishness of the play and to aggravate his close friend Smith.
The prologue and epilogue of Bayes’ play begins with the characters Thunder and Lightning. The prologue is gibberish and Smith once again questions Bayes about what’s happening. Bayes defends himself and the play by stating that it is a “new way of writing.” Because he doesn’t understand that Smith is criticizing, rather than complimenting, Bayes just answers all the questions as if they were purely academic queries and not patronizing questions.
Smith wonders aloud how these men so quickly did this. Bayes responds saying they’ve had this plan for a while, and that’s why they were whispering.
Scene 2
Bayes, Smith, and Johnson are watching and critiquing Bayes' play while all the other characters are acting it out.
Scene 2 of the play includes 3 major plot developments: the mysterious death, the fisherman/prince conundrum, and the boots/love affair.
The scene begins with the revelation that someone has die; however, exactly who has died is a rather obscure matter. Bayes and Smith are discussing the actual details of the scene in the midst of the scene occurring, with rebuttals and interjections between lines. Cordelio enters with a message that is difficult to grasp because all the audience can understand is that someone has died based on one person’s words from one kingdom through another’s words, incomprehensible. Smith questions Bayes on the identity of who has died, and Bayes still refuses to reveal the character, even suggesting that “she” may still not be dead. Yet, he directs to bring in the killer, leading into the Fisherman-Prince ordeal.
The Fisherman/ Prince scene does not help to develop the plot. Bayes expects his audience to already know that the Prince was found and raised as a son by the fisherman at a very young age, information that was not given during the earlier acts of the play. The prince then finds out that he is not actually the fisherman’s son. He is disturbed by this because he would rather be the son of a fisherman than a bastard. This section of the play circles around to where the plot started; without Bayes explanations it changes nothing of substance to the story.
Volscius falls in love. He is putting on his boots while talking about his love and how he feels love sick and in way over his head. He is giving the boot-putting-on process a second meaning. Boot-putting-on process = indecision. Bayes, Johnson, and Smith talk about how this dilemma is a real struggle, and that it is well portrayed through the boots.
The scene concludes with a dance to top off the act – Bayes's signature.
Act IV, Scene I
Bayes is constructing a brand new scene in his play even though it is the very last rehearsal. His new scene is centered around a funeral. The funeral is for a new made-up character, Lardella, who drowns at sea, even though she does not relate to the previous act at all. Bayes creates her brother as well, Drawcansir, a backwards hero in the play. He is named a “Hero” but he “frights his mistress, snubs up kings, baffles Armies, and does what he will, without regard to good manners, justice or numbers.” (4.1)
Act IV Scene I begins with Bayes’ reading of a letter that he wrote from Lardella as her final words, to be written to her cousin, the King. This final note is a ridiculous metaphor comparing herself to a “humble bee” forever to buzz around in the after-life, essentially remaining in the King’s shadow the rest of his life. She goes on to beckon the King to join her in the after-life, compelling him to draw his sword in compliance with Lardella’s request. However, Pallas intervenes and informs the King that Lardella is actually alive and they should have a banquet in place of the funeral. To add to the ridiculous scene, Pallas presents a lance full of wine. This “nuptial banquet” is then interrupted by Drawcansir’s arrival. He continues on to threaten the guests with death if they drink the wine, contrasting is supposed heroic stereotype, “Who e'er to gulp one drop of this dares think I'l stare away his very pow'r to drink.
I drink, I huff, I strut, look big and stare, And all this I can do, because I dare.” (4.1) Smith and Johnson question Bayes’ choice of hero, extolling Drawcansir sarcastically.
The very beginning of Act V Bayes introduces a scene with many characters including the two usurper kings, four cardinals, and two princes. Two cardinals are dressed differently from the others but Bayes won’t tell them why this is important. The scene doesn’t introduce anything new to the plot or help to advance the story. Although Bayes proclaims it is developing the plot. The two princes are being indecisive about explaining the situation to the usurpers and neither of them wants to talk first. Then the scene changes with Bayes bragging about Amaryllis speaking very well about the situation. Amaryllis speaks two words and if then cut off by music. The usurpers that are the throne randomly decide to leave. Then the rightful kings descend on clouds, trying to symbolize their divine right to rule. However they aren’t dead and this another example of Bayes’ confusing his audience. Bayes tries to emphasize the kings’ importance by having them speak in rhyme. However the kings’ speech makes doesn’t make any sense. At the end of the speech, fiddlers come out and the kings say they are going to play a certain song. However the fiddlers play a totally different song which Bayes thinks doesn’t matter. Smith points out that theis scene doesn’t make sense and that the way the kings are speaking is just confusing. Bayes defends himself by explaining they need to speak in rhyme because they came down from the clouds. The kings then begin to dance before they discuss “serious counsel”. The kings’ army then arrives in disguise because Bayes says they don’t want the usurpers to see the army. The kings pay them, and while Amaryllis is trying to speak again a fight breaks out. The Kings flee and Johns complains that Amaryllis hasn’t spoken yet. Bayes says she would have if she hadn’t been interrupted but again this doesn’t make any sense since he wrote it that way.
At this point Bayes is trying to defend his play from Johnson and Smith. This happens in an interim in acts between the play. They talk about having a fight scene, and Bayes says that there is one; this leads into the next Act. The fight scene is a mockery of fighting because they don’t pay attention to any actual forms of fighting, and the way it should be. One of the actors actually has a lute in one of his hands instead of a buckler. He even has the battle being stopped by an eclipse. Also during the battle, the General and the lieutenant General are talking in poetic and overly done form. Johnson says a sarcastic comment about how “This is an admirable representation of a Battel, as ever I saw.”
Bayes says that he wants to bring in an eclipse. He took the idea from a different play and he tells Johnson and smith about it. He describes what an eclipse is. He wants to have a dance that resembles the eclipse. Bayes will make a joke out of it- the moon sells the earth a bargain. Luna and Earth then enter without being introduced. Luna is concealed by her veil, like an eclipse. The sun soon joins them. The earth appears to be luna’s love. The sun is angry about the eclipse, but they acknowledge that it will soon be over. Bayes calls an end to the eclipse and another battle ensues. Bayes calls out commands for the fight and one man, drawcansir, comes in to fight them all. Drawcansir then has a mini monologue about how good of a fighter he is. He has apparently killed thousands of people and he thinks he stronger than gods. He exits. Bayes thinks this character is very brave, however this character’s idea is stolen from another play. Johnson and Smith suggest that the dead characters be carried off stage. Bayes finds this ridiculous because they are not actually dead, so he thinks that the actors should just walk off stage because the audiences knows that they are not actually dead. He commands them to leave the stage, and then he leaves as well. Johnson and smith leave. Bayes and the players are on stage again and Bayes wonders where the men went and goes to find them. One of the actors reads a paper that Bayes left behind that is another bit of “plot”. This actor exits. Bayes enters again; he couldn’t find the gentlemen. He then insults them for leaving his play early. New players enter, and one says that all of the other players have left. Bayes is insulted and starts ranting about how horrible the players are. He says he wants to sell the play to another play, but he doesn’t because a player says that the town wants to see the play tonight. He leaves. The leftover players decide to practice another play. Then they all go to dinner.
The epilogue says that there has been no plot to this play. There is also no wit. Hopefully this type of writing will die out. They hope that one will want more out of a play than pretty words. This is a bad writing style and it needs to change.
Satire
Satire is primarily a literary genre or form, although in practice it can also be found in the graphic and performing arts. In satire, vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, ideally with the intent of shaming individuals, and society itself, into improvement...
play aimed specifically at John Dryden
John Dryden
John Dryden was an influential English poet, literary critic, translator, and playwright who dominated the literary life of Restoration England to such a point that the period came to be known in literary circles as the Age of Dryden.Walter Scott called him "Glorious John." He was made Poet...
and generally at the sententious and overly ambitious theatre of the Restoration tragedy
English Restoration
The Restoration of the English monarchy began in 1660 when the English, Scottish and Irish monarchies were all restored under Charles II after the Interregnum that followed the Wars of the Three Kingdoms...
. The play was staged in 1671
1671 in literature
The year 1671 in literature involved some significant events.-Events:*Nell Gwyn retires from the stage.*On November 9, the Duke's Company open their new venue, the Dorset Garden Theatre.-New books:...
and published anonymously in 1672
1672 in literature
The year 1672 in literature involved some significant events.-Events:* In London, the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane is destroyed by fire. The King's Company moves into the theatre at Lincoln's Inn Fields, which their rivals the Duke's Company left the previous year.* During the 1672–73 theatre...
, but it is certainly by George Villiers, 2nd Duke of Buckingham
George Villiers, 2nd Duke of Buckingham
George Villiers, 2nd Duke of Buckingham, 20th Baron de Ros of Helmsley, KG, PC, FRS was an English statesman and poet.- Upbringing and education :...
and others. Several people have been suggested as collaborators, including Samuel Butler of Hudibras
Hudibras
Hudibras is an English mock heroic narrative poem from the 17th century written by Samuel Butler.-Purpose:The work is a satirical polemic upon Roundheads, Puritans, Presbyterians and many of the other factions involved in the English Civil War...
fame, Martin Clifford
Martin Clifford (writer)
Martin Clifford was an English writer and wit, who became headmaster of Charterhouse School.-Life:He was educated at Westminster School, and in 1640 went to Trinity College, Cambridge, taking his bachelor's degree three years later . After the Restoration of 1660 he was a man about town, with...
, and Thomas Sprat
Thomas Sprat
Thomas Sprat , English divine, was born at Beaminster, Dorset, and educated at Wadham College, Oxford, where he held a fellowship from 1657 to 1670.Having taken orders he became a prebendary of Lincoln Cathedral in 1660...
, a Royal Society
Royal Society
The Royal Society of London for Improving Natural Knowledge, known simply as the Royal Society, is a learned society for science, and is possibly the oldest such society in existence. Founded in November 1660, it was granted a Royal Charter by King Charles II as the "Royal Society of London"...
founder and later Bishop of Rochester
Bishop of Rochester
The Bishop of Rochester is the ordinary of the Church of England Diocese of Rochester in the Province of Canterbury.The diocese covers the west of the county of Kent and is centred in the city of Rochester where the bishop's seat is located at the Cathedral Church of Christ and the Blessed Virgin...
.
The play concerns a playwright
Playwright
A playwright, also called a dramatist, is a person who writes plays.The term is not a variant spelling of "playwrite", but something quite distinct: the word wright is an archaic English term for a craftsman or builder...
named Bayes attempting to stage a play. The play he is going to put on is made up almost entirely of excerpts of existing heroic drama
Heroic drama
Heroic drama is a type of play popular during the Restoration era in England, distinguished by both its verse structure and its subject matter. The sub-genre of heroic drama evolved through several works of the middle to later 1660s; John Dryden's The Indian Emperour and Roger Boyle's The Black...
s. The name "Bayes" indicates the poet laureate
Poet Laureate
A poet laureate is a poet officially appointed by a government and is often expected to compose poems for state occasions and other government events...
. The previous poet laureate had been William Davenant
William Davenant
Sir William Davenant , also spelled D'Avenant, was an English poet and playwright. Along with Thomas Killigrew, Davenant was one of the rare figures in English Renaissance theatre whose career spanned both the Caroline and Restoration eras and who was active both before and after the English Civil...
, and Davenant did stage spectacles and plays with exceptionally bombastic speeches from the heroes (e.g. The Siege of Rhodes). However, the poet laureate at the time of the play was Dryden, and most of the excerpts in the play-within-a-play are liftings from Dryden. In particular, Dryden's The Conquest of Granada
The Conquest of Granada
The Conquest of Granada is a Restoration era stage play, a two-part tragedy written by John Dryden that was first acted in 1670 and 1671 and published in 1672...
, which had been his most popular play (and the one whose preface had defined "heroic drama"), is the play Buckingham parodies. Dryden had written other heroic drama aside from The Conquest of Granada. In fact, he had been so prolific in that vein that Martin Clifford accused him of "stealing from himself." The reason that The Conquest of Granada was such a target, however, is the Preface to the printed version of The Conquest of Granada. There, Dryden scolds his fellow dramatists for having immoral heroes and low sentiments, and he proposes a new type of theater, the heroic drama
Heroic drama
Heroic drama is a type of play popular during the Restoration era in England, distinguished by both its verse structure and its subject matter. The sub-genre of heroic drama evolved through several works of the middle to later 1660s; John Dryden's The Indian Emperour and Roger Boyle's The Black...
. Buckingham's play is, in a sense, the old theater biting him back. In The Rehearsal, a director/author attempts to put on a new play, and he lectures his actors and critics with impossible and absurd instructions on the importance of what they are doing.
The Rehearsal infuriated Dryden, and it is not possible to see the satire without some political cause or effect. (Dryden would not forget the satire, and he made Buckingham into the figure of Zimri
Zimri (king)
Zimri or Zambri was a king of Israel for seven days. William F. Albright has dated his reign to 876 BCE, while E. R. Thiele offers the date 885 BCE. His story is told in 1 Kings, Chapter 16....
in his Absalom and Achitophel
Absalom and Achitophel
Absalom and Achitophel is a landmark poetic political satire by John Dryden. The poem exists in two parts. The first part, of 1681, is undoubtedly by Dryden...
.) However, for readers and viewers what was most delightful was the way that Buckingham effectively punctures the puffed up bombast of Dryden's plays. By taking Dryden's own words out of context and pasting them together, Buckingham disrupts whatever emotions that might have gone with them originally and exposes their inherent absurdity.
The play is credited with putting an end to heroic drama, but, in the long run, it did not. If "heroic drama" is understood only as the writings of Dryden in an heroic vein, then perhaps The Rehearsal was a success. Dryden was unable or unwilling to pursue heroic drama for long after The Rehearsal came out. Whether The Rehearsal or the she-tragedy
She-tragedy
The term she-tragedy refers to a vogue in the late 17th and early 18th centuries for tragic plays focused on the sufferings of an innocent and virtuous woman...
made popular by the acting of Elizabeth Barry
Elizabeth Barry
Elizabeth Barry was an English actress of the Restoration period.She worked in big, prestigious London theatre companies throughout her successful career: from 1675 in the Duke's Company, 1682 – 1695 in the monopoly United Company, and from 1695 onwards as a member of the actors' cooperative...
did it, there was a turn away from the Classical heroes of Dryden's heroic drama. However, new plays with exaggerated heroes who mouth impossibly high-sounding moral sentiments and accomplish impossibly extravagant actions continued to be written through to the 1740s (see, for example, Henry Carey
Henry Carey (writer)
Henry Carey was an English poet, dramatist and song-writer. He is remembered as an anti-Walpolean satirist and also as a patriot. Several of his melodies continue to be sung today, and he was widely praised in the generation after his death...
's Chrononhotonthologos
Chrononhotonthologos
Chrononhotonthologos is a satirical play by the English poet and songwriter Henry Carey from 1734. Although the play has been seen as nonsense verse, it was also seen and celebrated at the time as a satire on Robert Walpole and Queen Caroline, wife of George II.The play is relatively short on the...
). In fact, the trend toward absurdly lofty bombast and sentiment was so strong that Richard Brinsley Sheridan
Richard Brinsley Sheridan
Richard Brinsley Butler Sheridan was an Irish-born playwright and poet and long-term owner of the London Theatre Royal, Drury Lane. For thirty-two years he was also a Whig Member of the British House of Commons for Stafford , Westminster and Ilchester...
reworked The Rehearsal for his play, The Critic
The Critic (play)
The Critic: or, a Tragedy Rehearsed is a satire by Richard Brinsley Sheridan. It was first staged at Drury Lane Theatre in 1779. It is a burlesque on stage acting and play production conventions, and Sheridan considered the first act to be his finest piece of writing...
(1779
1779 in literature
-Events:* William Blake enrols at the Royal Academy*April 6 - Premiėre of Iphigenie auf Tauris by Johann Wolfgang Goethe.-New books:* Richard Graves - Columella* Friedrich Heinrich Jacobi - Woldemar...
), where the target was the inflated importance and prose of theater criticism. To some degree, the parodic
Parody
A parody , in current usage, is an imitative work created to mock, comment on, or trivialise an original work, its subject, author, style, or some other target, by means of humorous, satiric or ironic imitation...
form of a play-within-a-play goes back to Shakespeare's
William Shakespeare
William Shakespeare was an English poet and playwright, widely regarded as the greatest writer in the English language and the world's pre-eminent dramatist. He is often called England's national poet and the "Bard of Avon"...
satire of pantomime plays in A Midsummer Night's Dream
A Midsummer Night's Dream
A Midsummer Night's Dream is a play that was written by William Shakespeare. It is believed to have been written between 1590 and 1596. It portrays the events surrounding the marriage of the Duke of Athens, Theseus, and the Queen of the Amazons, Hippolyta...
and forward to the contemporary Mel Brooks
Mel Brooks
Mel Brooks is an American film director, screenwriter, composer, lyricist, comedian, actor and producer. He is best known as a creator of broad film farces and comic parodies. He began his career as a stand-up comic and as a writer for the early TV variety show Your Show of Shows...
play, The Producers.
Eighteenth-century editions of The Rehearsal contained a Key that identified the Restoration plays to which Buckingham and his collaborators allude in their work. The Key was originally attributed to Buckingham himself, but is actually the work of Morphew Briscoe. Briscoe's Key contains some accurate information, but also has deficiencies. Later commentators have worked to improve upon it.
Character list
Reproduced from the first edition, but adjusted to modern spelling.MEN
Bayes
Johnson
Smith
Two Kings of Brentford
Prince Pretty-man
Prince Volscius
Gentleman Usher
Physician
Drawcansir
General
Lieutenant General
Cordelio
Tom Thimble
Fisherman
Sun
Thunder
Players
Soldiers
Two Heralds
Four Cardinals
Mayor
Judges
Sergeants at Arms
WOMEN
Amaryllis
Cloris
Parthenope
Pallas
Lightning
Moon
Earth
Attendants of Men and Women.
Act I, Scene I
Johnson and Smith, (they are lovers) who has just come to the city, from the country, meet and begin talking about the new plays that are currently being shown. The author and director of a new play, Bayes appears and introduces his production to the two men, boasting about the greatness of his work. Lacking inspiration for original material, Bayes steals all of his ideas from different epics and plays of the time. He fails to consider his audience, and expects them to understand the play as he does. Wanting to show off his play, he offers to bring Johnson and Smith to a rehearsal.When the three men arrive at the rehearsal stage, the actors are seen struggling to understand how they should portray their roles. Bayes continually intervenes to explain what’s going on in the play to Smith and Johnson and also to direct the players.
Because it goes in many directions, Smith constantly asks Bayes about the plot of the play, in particular the interchangeable prologue and epilogue. However, Bayes retorts by saying Smith doesn’t understand because he’s been in the country for too long. Johnson spurs Bayes on, because he wants to see the foolishness of the play and to aggravate his close friend Smith.
The prologue and epilogue of Bayes’ play begins with the characters Thunder and Lightning. The prologue is gibberish and Smith once again questions Bayes about what’s happening. Bayes defends himself and the play by stating that it is a “new way of writing.” Because he doesn’t understand that Smith is criticizing, rather than complimenting, Bayes just answers all the questions as if they were purely academic queries and not patronizing questions.
Act II, Scene I
Bayes introduces his play, and claims that it will begin with two men whispering to one another. Smith questions Bayes’ methods, but the egotistical playwright justifies the whispering on the grounds that they’re politicians and not supposed to talk about matters of state. We later discover the two men are plotting against the king, and Bayes wants to foreshadow the future overthrowing of the king. Johnson predicts that despite what Bayes says, this play is never going to be understood. Smith and Johnson ridicule the whispering, calling it a “new foppery.”Act II, Scene II
Two kings enter the stage, hand in hand. They begin speaking of the whispering between the usher and the physician which Smith once again questions, as the kings were not present in the previous scene. Bayes faults the actors by saying they should have entered earlier.Act II, Scene III
Yet another new actor comes out as Prince Pretty-man and immediately declares he needs to sleep (which is part of the play). A woman actress enters, supposedly Prince Pretty-man’s love interest, but he describes her as a blazing comet. Bayes takes pride in this line because it reflects his “new” use of the simile. Prince Pretty-man falls asleep and suddenly awakes, declaring “it” is resolved. No one is sure, other than Bayes, what “it” is. When questioned, Bayes declares that this is the new style of writing, where one doesn’t need to explain oneself.Act II, Scene IV
The whispering actors return, confused as to whether or not their whispers, from the opening scene, were overheard. This scene, according to Bayes, is meant to show the audience how businessmen ought to discuss business. It has nothing to do with the plot that has yet to be uncovered. The two actors pull out their swords and sit; somehow this indicates that a secret plot has been revealed and these two men have overthrown the kings and are now the new kings.Smith wonders aloud how these men so quickly did this. Bayes responds saying they’ve had this plan for a while, and that’s why they were whispering.
Act II, Scene V
Four actor-soldiers enter and kill one another. Despite their deaths, they are able to stand up and perform a lengthy dance. Bayes offers constructive criticism on their dancing. The actors complain that they are unable to dance to this music, since it begins fast and ends slow. Bayes attempts to show them how it’s done, but falls on his face, breaking his nose.Act III, Scene I
Act III begins after Bayes’s injury from his previous fall, whereupon he tells Johnson and Smith he plans to end every Act with a dance (an idea that is not well-received by either man). Bayes then continues to describe his style of writing, adding that some scenes of his play might be entirely unnecessary to the plot, but are full of “Wit” and are very popular in the “new style” of writing. At this point, the plot spirals into nonsensical ranting, and Johnson and Smith comment that the play is meaningless, use of rhetorical strategies is wanton or unnecessary, and the “Wit” Bayes so proudly highlights is non-existent. In fact, the further the play continues, the less sense it makes, and the more Bayes defends it. Eventually the three men discuss the art if writing and its disadvantages, namely the audiences’ lack of appreciation for the style of the play. Johnson and Smith use this as a subtle suggestion to Bayes that perhaps writing is not his forte; Bayes, however, takes it as an opportunity to gain pity from Johnson and Smith, describing the “bane of [Writers]” and asserting that he will continue writing no matter what since he “know[s] [his] things to be good”. Discussion continues to include commenting on Bayes frequent use of “Songs, Ghosts, and Idols,” and other frivolous inclusions (i.e. dancing) for the sake of supposed artistic ‘merit.’ Finally, Bayes calls his play a “Touch-stone,” and says he will be able to judge the character of any man by observing his reaction to the play.Scene 2
Bayes, Smith, and Johnson are watching and critiquing Bayes' play while all the other characters are acting it out.
Scene 2 of the play includes 3 major plot developments: the mysterious death, the fisherman/prince conundrum, and the boots/love affair.
The scene begins with the revelation that someone has die; however, exactly who has died is a rather obscure matter. Bayes and Smith are discussing the actual details of the scene in the midst of the scene occurring, with rebuttals and interjections between lines. Cordelio enters with a message that is difficult to grasp because all the audience can understand is that someone has died based on one person’s words from one kingdom through another’s words, incomprehensible. Smith questions Bayes on the identity of who has died, and Bayes still refuses to reveal the character, even suggesting that “she” may still not be dead. Yet, he directs to bring in the killer, leading into the Fisherman-Prince ordeal.
The Fisherman/ Prince scene does not help to develop the plot. Bayes expects his audience to already know that the Prince was found and raised as a son by the fisherman at a very young age, information that was not given during the earlier acts of the play. The prince then finds out that he is not actually the fisherman’s son. He is disturbed by this because he would rather be the son of a fisherman than a bastard. This section of the play circles around to where the plot started; without Bayes explanations it changes nothing of substance to the story.
Volscius falls in love. He is putting on his boots while talking about his love and how he feels love sick and in way over his head. He is giving the boot-putting-on process a second meaning. Boot-putting-on process = indecision. Bayes, Johnson, and Smith talk about how this dilemma is a real struggle, and that it is well portrayed through the boots.
The scene concludes with a dance to top off the act – Bayes's signature.
Act IV, Scene I
Bayes is constructing a brand new scene in his play even though it is the very last rehearsal. His new scene is centered around a funeral. The funeral is for a new made-up character, Lardella, who drowns at sea, even though she does not relate to the previous act at all. Bayes creates her brother as well, Drawcansir, a backwards hero in the play. He is named a “Hero” but he “frights his mistress, snubs up kings, baffles Armies, and does what he will, without regard to good manners, justice or numbers.” (4.1)
Act IV Scene I begins with Bayes’ reading of a letter that he wrote from Lardella as her final words, to be written to her cousin, the King. This final note is a ridiculous metaphor comparing herself to a “humble bee” forever to buzz around in the after-life, essentially remaining in the King’s shadow the rest of his life. She goes on to beckon the King to join her in the after-life, compelling him to draw his sword in compliance with Lardella’s request. However, Pallas intervenes and informs the King that Lardella is actually alive and they should have a banquet in place of the funeral. To add to the ridiculous scene, Pallas presents a lance full of wine. This “nuptial banquet” is then interrupted by Drawcansir’s arrival. He continues on to threaten the guests with death if they drink the wine, contrasting is supposed heroic stereotype, “Who e'er to gulp one drop of this dares think I'l stare away his very pow'r to drink.
I drink, I huff, I strut, look big and stare, And all this I can do, because I dare.” (4.1) Smith and Johnson question Bayes’ choice of hero, extolling Drawcansir sarcastically.
The very beginning of Act V Bayes introduces a scene with many characters including the two usurper kings, four cardinals, and two princes. Two cardinals are dressed differently from the others but Bayes won’t tell them why this is important. The scene doesn’t introduce anything new to the plot or help to advance the story. Although Bayes proclaims it is developing the plot. The two princes are being indecisive about explaining the situation to the usurpers and neither of them wants to talk first. Then the scene changes with Bayes bragging about Amaryllis speaking very well about the situation. Amaryllis speaks two words and if then cut off by music. The usurpers that are the throne randomly decide to leave. Then the rightful kings descend on clouds, trying to symbolize their divine right to rule. However they aren’t dead and this another example of Bayes’ confusing his audience. Bayes tries to emphasize the kings’ importance by having them speak in rhyme. However the kings’ speech makes doesn’t make any sense. At the end of the speech, fiddlers come out and the kings say they are going to play a certain song. However the fiddlers play a totally different song which Bayes thinks doesn’t matter. Smith points out that theis scene doesn’t make sense and that the way the kings are speaking is just confusing. Bayes defends himself by explaining they need to speak in rhyme because they came down from the clouds. The kings then begin to dance before they discuss “serious counsel”. The kings’ army then arrives in disguise because Bayes says they don’t want the usurpers to see the army. The kings pay them, and while Amaryllis is trying to speak again a fight breaks out. The Kings flee and Johns complains that Amaryllis hasn’t spoken yet. Bayes says she would have if she hadn’t been interrupted but again this doesn’t make any sense since he wrote it that way.
At this point Bayes is trying to defend his play from Johnson and Smith. This happens in an interim in acts between the play. They talk about having a fight scene, and Bayes says that there is one; this leads into the next Act. The fight scene is a mockery of fighting because they don’t pay attention to any actual forms of fighting, and the way it should be. One of the actors actually has a lute in one of his hands instead of a buckler. He even has the battle being stopped by an eclipse. Also during the battle, the General and the lieutenant General are talking in poetic and overly done form. Johnson says a sarcastic comment about how “This is an admirable representation of a Battel, as ever I saw.”
Bayes says that he wants to bring in an eclipse. He took the idea from a different play and he tells Johnson and smith about it. He describes what an eclipse is. He wants to have a dance that resembles the eclipse. Bayes will make a joke out of it- the moon sells the earth a bargain. Luna and Earth then enter without being introduced. Luna is concealed by her veil, like an eclipse. The sun soon joins them. The earth appears to be luna’s love. The sun is angry about the eclipse, but they acknowledge that it will soon be over. Bayes calls an end to the eclipse and another battle ensues. Bayes calls out commands for the fight and one man, drawcansir, comes in to fight them all. Drawcansir then has a mini monologue about how good of a fighter he is. He has apparently killed thousands of people and he thinks he stronger than gods. He exits. Bayes thinks this character is very brave, however this character’s idea is stolen from another play. Johnson and Smith suggest that the dead characters be carried off stage. Bayes finds this ridiculous because they are not actually dead, so he thinks that the actors should just walk off stage because the audiences knows that they are not actually dead. He commands them to leave the stage, and then he leaves as well. Johnson and smith leave. Bayes and the players are on stage again and Bayes wonders where the men went and goes to find them. One of the actors reads a paper that Bayes left behind that is another bit of “plot”. This actor exits. Bayes enters again; he couldn’t find the gentlemen. He then insults them for leaving his play early. New players enter, and one says that all of the other players have left. Bayes is insulted and starts ranting about how horrible the players are. He says he wants to sell the play to another play, but he doesn’t because a player says that the town wants to see the play tonight. He leaves. The leftover players decide to practice another play. Then they all go to dinner.
The epilogue says that there has been no plot to this play. There is also no wit. Hopefully this type of writing will die out. They hope that one will want more out of a play than pretty words. This is a bad writing style and it needs to change.