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Swinging



 
 
Swinging, sometimes referred to as the swinging lifestyle, is "non-monogamous sexual activity, treated much like any other social activity, that can be experienced as a couple." The phenomenon of swinging (or at least its wider discussion and practice) may be seen as part of the sexual revolution
Sexual revolution

The sexual revolution encompasses the well-documented changes in social thought and codes of behaviour related to sexuality throughout the Western world that continues to evolve....
 of recent decades, which occurred after the upsurge in sexual activity made possible by the prevalence of safer sex
Safe sex

Safe sex is the practice of sexual activity in a manner that reduces the risk of infection with sexually transmitted diseases . Conversely, unsafe sex is the practice of sexual intercourse without regard for prevention of STDs....
 practices during the same period.






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Encyclopedia


Swinging, sometimes referred to as the swinging lifestyle, is "non-monogamous sexual activity, treated much like any other social activity, that can be experienced as a couple." The phenomenon of swinging (or at least its wider discussion and practice) may be seen as part of the sexual revolution
Sexual revolution

The sexual revolution encompasses the well-documented changes in social thought and codes of behaviour related to sexuality throughout the Western world that continues to evolve....
 of recent decades, which occurred after the upsurge in sexual activity made possible by the prevalence of safer sex
Safe sex

Safe sex is the practice of sexual activity in a manner that reduces the risk of infection with sexually transmitted diseases . Conversely, unsafe sex is the practice of sexual intercourse without regard for prevention of STDs....
 practices during the same period. Swinging has been called wife swapping in the past, but this term has been criticized as androcentric
Androcentrism

Androcentrism is the practice, conscious or otherwise, of placing male human beings or the masculine point of view at the center of one's view of the world and its culture and history....
 (taking a male-oriented point of view) and inaccurately describing the full range of sexual activities in which swingers may take part.

Activities

Swinging activities may include (but are not limited to):

  • Soft swinging: having sexual intercourse with a partner while two or more other people perform sex acts in the immediate vicinity.
  • Soft swap: having oral sex
    Non-penetrative sex

    Non-penetrative sex is sexual activity without vaginal, anal, and Mouth Sexual penetration, as opposed to sexual intercourse, anal sex, or oral sex....
     with someone other than one's partner. Often a type of swinging that new couples choose before eventually trying full swap, although many couples stay "soft swap" for personal or safety related reasons.
  • Full swap: having penetrative sex
    Sexual intercourse

    Sexual intercourse, also known as copulation or coitus, commonly refers to the act in which the Penis enters the Vagina. The two entities may be of opposite sexes or not, or they may be hermaphrodite, as is the case with snails....
     with someone other than one's partner. Although this is the commonly understood definition of swinging, it is not necessarily the most common type.
  • Group sex
    Group sex

    Group sex is sexual behaviour involving more than two participants at the same time. The main focus of this page is group sex among humans; however, group sex also exists with other species in the animal kingdom - e.g., bighorn sheep and bonobos....
    : An all-inclusive term for activities involving multiple partners in the same vicinity.


Typically,swinging activities occur when a married
Marriage

Marriage is a social, spirituality, or law union of individuals. This union may also be called matrimony, while the ceremony that marks its beginning is usually called a wedding and the married status created is sometimes called wedlock....
 or otherwise committed couple engages in sexual activity with another couple, multiple couples, or a single individual. These acts can occur in the same room (often called same room swinging) though different or separate room swinging does occur. On these occasions, swingers will often refer to sex as play and sex partners as playmates. Occasionally, one party of a couple will not be interested in joining the swinging lifestyle. This party is typically referred to as the "hold-out" while the other party is referred to as the "desirous party". Thus, the "desirous party" is the one party of a swinging couple who seeks to be in the lifestyle as opposed to the other party who does not.

History


17th Century Chr.E.

Temporary spouse-trading was commonly advocated and practiced among occultists, particularly alchemists, in Europe (such as at Prague) in the 17th century.

18th Century Chr.E.

Some such occultists were the Frankists who in the mid-18th century established in Salonika (Thessalonia), Makedonia, the Dönmeh cult : "The Donmeh now converted the Shabbatain Purim into an annual orgy, when members exchanged spouses for a ceremony called 'extinguishing the lights.'" "Once a year [during the Doenmes' annual 'Sheep holiday'] the candles are put out in the course of a dinner which is attended by orgies and the ceremony of the exchange of wives." "The Dönmeh and the Frankists each had sexual-religious rituals, ranging from wife-swapping ..." From collaboration of the Frankists with Zizendorf of Moravia derived the "initiated sea captains sailing for the Swedish East India Company", who set up a liaison with oriental Tantrists; in a similar manner as in the 20th century Air Force pilots were involved in introducing "swinging" to the United States.

19th Century Chr. E.

The sobriquet "Communist" was applied (especially in Germany) to some who advocated spouse-trading in the mid-19th century onward.

20th Century Chr.E.

While contemporary swingers look to earlier practices, such as ancient Roman acceptance of orgies and alternative sexual practices, swinging in the 20th century began differently.

According to Terry Gould's Book The Lifestyle: A Look at the Erotic Rites of Swingers , swinging began among United States Army Air Force pilots and their wives during World War II
World War II

World War II, or the Second World War , was a global military conflict which involved a Participants in World War II, including all of the great powers, organised into two opposing military alliances: the Allies of World War II and the Axis powers....
. The mortality rate of pilots was high. Gould reports that a close bond arose between pilots, with the implication that husbands would care for all the wives as their own, emotionally and sexually, if the husbands were away or lost (thus bearing some similarity to levirate marriage
Levirate marriage

Levirate marriage is a types of marriages in which a widow is required to marry one of her husband's brothers after her husband's death. Levirate marriage has been practiced by societies with a strong clan structure in which exogamous marriage, i.e....
).

This is debatable, however, since it would have been unusual for wives to accompany their husbands on foreign tours. Other sources point to U.S. Air Force pilots in the California
California

California is a U.S. state on the West Coast of the United States of the United States, along the Pacific Ocean. It is bordered by Oregon to the north, Nevada to the east, Arizona to the southeast, and to the south the Mexico state of Baja California....
 desert as the original participants. Though the beginnings are not agreed upon, it is assumed swinging began among American military communities in the 1950s. By the time the Korean War
Korean War

The Korean War refers to a period of military conflict between North Korea and South Korea regimes, with major hostilities lasting from June 25, 1950 until the armistice signed on July 27, 1953....
 ended, swinging had spread from the military to the suburbs. The media dubbed the phenomenon wife-swapping.

The first swingers' organization, the Sexual Freedom League
Sexual Freedom League

The Sexual Freedom League was an organization founded in 1963 in New York City by Jefferson Poland. It existed to promote and conduct sexual activity among its members and to agitate for political reform, especially for the repeal of laws against abortion and censorship....
, began in the 1960s in Berkeley, California
Berkeley, California

Berkeley is a city on the east shore of San Francisco Bay in Northern California, in the United States. Its neighbors to the south are the cities of Oakland, California and Emeryville, California....
 by a young student named Robert McGinley, in the sexually liberal San Francisco Bay Area
San Francisco Bay Area

The San Francisco Bay Area, commonly known as the Bay Area, or the Bay, is a metropolitan region that surrounds the San Francisco Bay and San Pablo Bay Bays in Northern California....
. McGinley later formed an umbrella organization called the North American Swing Club Association (NASCA) (now NASCA International
NASCA International

NASCA International is an association of clubs, websites, publications, travel agencies, and events catering to the swinging lifestyle community....
) was formed to disseminate information about swinging across North America
North America

North America is the northern continent of the Americas, situated in the Earth's northern hemisphere and almost totally in the western hemisphere....
. Many internet related organizations now exist, some sporting hundreds of thousands of members

In the United Kingdom there was a proliferation of neighborhood groups in the early 1970s — known as "wife swapping" groups — and press articles in later years suggest the peak was 1973–75.

Research

Subjective scientific research has been conducted in the United States since the late 1960s. One study, based on an Internet
Internet

The Internet is a global network of interconnected computers, enabling users to share information along multiple channels. Typically, a computer that connects to the Internet can access information from a vast array of available server and other computers by moving information from them to the computer's local memory....
 questionnaire
Questionnaire

File:Questionnaire.jpgA questionnaire is a research instrument consisting of a series of questions and other prompts for the purpose of gathering information from respondents....
 addressed to visitors of swinger-related sites, found swingers are happier in their relationships than the norm.

  • 60% said that swinging improved their relationship; 1.7% said swinging made their relationship less happy. Approximately 50% of those who rated their relationship "very happy" before becoming swingers maintained their relationship had become happier.
  • 90% of those with less happy relationship
    Intimate relationship

    An intimate relationship is a particularly close interpersonal relationship. It is a relationship in which the participants know or trust one another very well or are confidants of one another, or a relationship in which there is physical intimacy or emotional intimacy....
    s said swinging improved them.
  • Almost 70% of swingers claimed no problem with jealousy
    Jealousy

    Jealousy typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety that occur when a person believes an item of value is being threatened ....
    ; approximately 25% admitted "I have difficulty controlling jealousy when swinging" as "somewhat true", while 6% said this was "yes, very much" true.
  • Swingers rate themselves happier ("very happy": 59% of swingers compared to 32% of non-swingers) and their lives more "exciting" (76% of swingers compared to 54% of non-swingers) than non-swingers, by significantly large margins.


There was no significant difference between responses of men and women, although more males (70%) than females completed the survey.

This study is of limited accuracy due to self-selected sampling
Nonprobability sampling

sampling is the use of a subset of the population to represent the whole population. Probability sampling, or random sampling, is a sampling technique in which the probability of getting any particular sample may be calculated....
. Internet-based sampling procedures create a substantial potential for bias. For instance, swinging couples who had stronger relationships may have been more motivated to complete the questionnaire. Alternatively, because swinging may cause stress on a marriage, only those with higher than average commitment are able to remain married while swinging. Couples who have jealousy or strife issues caused by swinging will not usually stay in the lifestyle, and therefore would have been less likely to respond.

ABC News
ABC News

ABC News is a division of United States television and radio network American Broadcasting Company, owned by The Walt Disney Company. Its current president is David Westin....
 reporter John Stossel
John Stossel

John F. Stossel is a consumer reporter, Investigative journalism, author, libertarian columnist, and news presenter for the ABC News show 20/20....
 produced an investigative report
Investigative report

An investigative report is a document that is meant to provide information on a certain topic that is not easily obtained. It is meant to present the reader with a wealth of easily understood information and usually contains an interview or two on the subject....
 into the swinging lifestyle. Stossel reported that more than four million people are swingers, according to estimates by the Kinsey Institute and other researchers. He also cited Terry Gould's research, which concluded that "couples swing in order to not cheat on their partners." When Stossel asked swinging couples whether they worry their spouse will "find they like someone else better", one male replied, "People in the swinging community swing for a reason. They don't swing to go out and find a new wife;" a woman asserted, "It makes women more confident - that they are the ones in charge." Stossel interviewed 12 marriage counselors
Relationship counseling

Relationship counseling is the process of counseling the parties of a Interpersonal relationship in an effort to recognize and to better manage or reconcile troublesome differences and repeating patterns of distress....
. According to Stossel, "not one of them said don't do it", though some said "getting sexual thrills outside of marriage can threaten a marriage". Nevertheless, swingers whom Stossel interviewed claimed "their marriages are stronger because they don't have affairs and they don't lie to each other."

Organizations

Certain swinging activities are highly organized. Most major cities in North America and western Europe have at least one swingers' club in a permanent location (although they often keep a low profile to avoid negative attention); over 3,000 swinging clubs exist worldwide. Slightly over 1,000 have online presences , but there are countless small neighborhood clubs, which are known among members of the lifestyle community, but do not have websites (for obvious reasons). As such, the true number of Swinger Clubs is impossible to confirm, but can be safely guessed to number in the thousands worldwide.

Swingers commonly meet through lifestyle magazines, personal ads, swinging house parties, swinger conventions, and Internet
Internet

The Internet is a global network of interconnected computers, enabling users to share information along multiple channels. Typically, a computer that connects to the Internet can access information from a vast array of available server and other computers by moving information from them to the computer's local memory....
 sites.

Although the term "club" may refer to a group that organizes lifestyle-related events in a particular area, it can also refer to a physical location or building. In this latter context, clubs are typically divided into on-premises clubs, where sexual activity may occur at the club itself, and off-premises clubs, where sexual activity is not allowed at the club, but may be arranged at a nearby location.

In the US, many off-premises swinging clubs follow a bar
Bar (establishment)

A bar is a business that serves drinks, especially alcoholic beverages such as beer, liquor, and mixed drinks, for consumption on the premises....
 or nightclub
Nightclub

A nightclub is a Alcoholic beverage, Dance and entertainment Music venue which does its primary business after dark. People who frequent nightclubs are known as clubbers....
 format, sometimes renting an entire existing bar (frequently termed a venue takeover) for scheduled events. Takeovers are normally done to avoid interaction with non-lifestyle segments of the population, and to avoid unwanted negative attention. Consequently, on weekends in suburbia
SubUrbia

subUrbia is an Off-Broadway Play by Eric Bogosian set against the nighttime activities of a group of aimless 20-somethings and a reunion with a former high school classmate who has become a successful musician....
, bars in large industrial park
Industrial park

An industrial park or industrial estate is an area of real property set aside for industry Urban planning. Industrial parks are usually located close to transport facilities, especially where intermodal freight transport coincide: highways, railroads, airports, and navigation rivers....
s that attract a mainstream clientèle during weekdays and would otherwise sit empty or closed on weekends (when business offices are closed) are likely locations for a takeover.

On-premises clubs usually have a similar format as off-premises clubs. A notable exception is that most on-premises clubs do not serve alcohol, asking participants instead to bring their own, thus avoiding issues from restrictive laws regarding sexual activity and the sale of alcoholic beverages. Concordantly, the vast majority of swinging clubs in the US do not advertise as such.

In Europe, off-premises clubs are rare, and the majority of swinging venues allow sexual contact and serve alcohol. Three standard formats exist: the bar/nightclub (usually smaller, in city centres and focused around a dance floor), the spa (which has pools, Jacuzzis, saunas and steam rooms where people strip on entry), and the country club (which is out-of-town, usually serves a free buffet, and may include elements of the first two formats while also offering large play spaces).

A large amount of swinging activity is organized via the Internet on various sites with personals, listings, and local information. For many couples, the swinging lifestyle and the clubs can be as much a social venue as a sexual one. Like many sexual subcultures, a strong community atmosphere exists, fostered in part by the greater communication enabled by the Internet.

Subgroups


Bisexuality and same-sex activity

Attitudes to same-sex activity and bisexuality vary by culture and locale, and by gender.

As a rule, female bisexuality
Bisexuality

Bisexuality refers to sexual behavior with or physical attraction to people of both genders , or a bisexual orientation. People who have a bisexual orientation "can experience sexual attraction, emotional, and affectional attraction to both their own sex and the opposite sex"; "it also refers to an individual?s sense of personal and social i...
 and bicuriosity are common in both the "selective" (see below) and traditional swinging scenes and tend to be the norm amongst participants; by contrast, male same-sex activity has a wider variation in its handling, and may be welcomed, accepted, frowned upon, or forbidden. Swing clubs and other facilities exist for gay and bisexual interests for both genders, but differ – for example bathhouses
Gay bathhouse

Gay bathhouses, also known as gay saunas or steam baths , are places where men can go to men who have sex with men. Not all men who visit such bathhouses consider themselves homosexuality....
 and the like for gay males, sometimes described as being "controversial" even in the gay community due to safer sex concerns, whereas women's clubs are "comparatively rare" and tend to be organized as private events, or niche clubs with high popularity for their events.

No studies have been conducted as to what percentage of swinging men or women who define themselves as bisexual would be open to romantic as well as sexual relations with both genders.

Dogging


Dogging
Dogging (sexual slang)

Dogging is a United Kingdom euphemism for engaging in sexual acts in a semi-public place or watching others doing so. Frequently, there are more than two participants; both group sex and gang banging can be included....
 is a British term for swinging that takes place in a public but reasonably secluded area (often based in cars, but not necessarily). There are many known dogging spots across the UK
United Kingdom

The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, commonly known as the United Kingdom , the UK or Britain,is a sovereign state located off the northwestern coast of continental Europe....
 where people go after dark, typically to engage in voyeurism
Voyeurism

In clinical psychology, voyeurism is the sexual interest in or practice of spying on people engaged in intimate behaviors, such as undressing, sexual activity, or other activity usually considered to be of a private nature....
 and exhibitionism
Exhibitionism

Exhibitionism, known variously as flashing, apodysophilia and Lady Godiva syndrome, is the psychological need and pattern of behavior involving the exposure of parts of the body to another person with a tendency toward an extravagant, usually at least partially sexually inspired behavior to attract the attention of another...
 but also to take part in group sex
Group sex

Group sex is sexual behaviour involving more than two participants at the same time. The main focus of this page is group sex among humans; however, group sex also exists with other species in the animal kingdom - e.g., bighorn sheep and bonobos....
.

Hot Wife


The term hot wife refers to a married woman who has sex with men other than her spouse, with the husband's consent, of course. In most cases the husband takes a vicarious pleasure in watching the pleasure of his wife and the man or men, or enjoys watching, hearing, or knowing about his wife's adventures
Compersion

Compersion is a term used by practitioners of polyamory to describe the experience of taking pleasure that one's partner is experiencing pleasure, even if the source of their pleasure is other than yourself....
. Husbands may also take part by engaging in threesome
Threesome

File:Wiki-gangbang.pngA threesome is a form of group sex involving three people of any gender combination....
s, or arranging dates for their wives.

One variant of the hot wife phenomenon is when two men (one generally the husband and the other perhaps a close friend) take turns pleasuring his wife, each immediately taking over from the other as soon as his orgasm
Orgasm

An orgasm is the conclusion of the Human sexual response cycle#Plateau phase of Human sexual response cycle, and may be experienced by both males and females....
 is reached. In effect one man is recovering while the other is active, but the woman effectively has continuous intercourse
Intercourse

Intercourse can refer to:*Sexual intercourse*Any kind of human communication and/or interaction*Intercourse , by Andrea Dworkin*Intercourse, Alabama...
. In this way, particularly if the woman experiences multiple orgasms, this game can effectively provide her with a very extended sexual act that she could not experience in any other way.

Cuckolding


A distinct threesome subculture is cuckolding. Cuckolding is a subgenre where open relationship and threesomes meet. In a cuckold experience one partner has sex with another person outside of their primary relationship for a limited number of times and the person who engages in the experience generally shares that experience with their partner after the encounter has ended. Generally cuckolding differs from an open relationship as it does not involve an ongoing emotional relationship that is commonly found in open relationship nor is it an ongoing relationship that is commonly found in an open relationship. Though the nonparticipating partner is not involved in the sexual act they may be involved in preparation and selection of the third person. Cuckolding is not always done for sexual humiliation as it may be done to allow sexual exploration, the opportunity to live out a fantasy, fulfill a desire, or sexual fulfillment that cannot usually be obtained through the normal boundaries of a relationship. In essence cuckolding seeks to 'fill the gap' that is left by other threesome or group sex activities.


Polyamory

Polyamory
Polyamory

Polyamory is the desire, practice, or acceptance of having more than one loving, intimate relationship at a time with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved....
 is the desire, practice, or acceptance of having more than one loving, intimate relationship at a time with full knowledge and consent by everyone involved. Poly lifestyles vary, with some being open relationship
Open relationship

An open relationship denotes a relationship in which the participants are free to have sexual intercourse with other partners. If the couple making this agreement are married, it is an open marriage....
s and others being polyfidelitous. Many people involved in polyamory are not swingers. Some are openly critical of swingers, contrasting their committed relationships with the recreational sex that, in their view, swingers practice. Others are not critical of swingers but simply do not regard themselves as belonging to the same group.

Selective swinging

Traditionally swinger clubs accept all ages and body types, and the average age of swingers is 39, while the ages when people first enter the swinging lifestyle average 31 for women and 34 for men. Younger swingers who wish to swing with their own age group find that this isn't always possible in swinging clubs. Fever Parties began organising events for affluent under-40s in London
London

London is the capital of both England and the United Kingdom, and the most populous municipality in the European Union. An important settlement for two millennia, History of London goes back to its founding by the Roman Empire....
 in the late 1990s. Other organisers, such as Lounge Parties in London (who select on looks, but not age) and Belle Baise in the Midlands (who select on looks and age) have sprung up. These organisations try to elevate themselves by hosting events in upmarket venues, serving Champagne or cocktails and asking guests to dress in smart evening attire. Entry is often competitive and photographs are usually required to demonstrate attractiveness. Due to the success of these events in the UK, they have spread to Norway
Norway

Norway , officially the Kingdom of Norway, is a constitutional monarchy in Northern Europe that occupies the western portion of the Scandinavian Peninsula....
, South Africa
South Africa

The Republic of South Africa, also known by Official names of South Africa, is a country located at the southern tip of the continent of Africa....
, Sweden
Sweden

Sweden , officially the Kingdom of Sweden , is a Nordic countries on the Scandinavian Peninsula in Northern Europe. Sweden has land borders with Norway to the west and Finland to the northeast, and it is connected to Denmark by the ?resund Bridge in the south....
 and the United States
United States

The United States of America is a Federal government constitutional republic comprising U.S. state and a federal district. The country is situated mostly in central North America, where its Contiguous United States and Washington, D.C., the Capital districts and territories, lie between the Pacific Ocean and Atlantic Oceans, Borders of the U...
. This has renewed the term The Lifestyle
Lifestyle

Lifestyle was originally coined by Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler in 1929. The current broader sense of the word dates from 1961.In sociology, a lifestyle is the way a person lives....
 to encompass swinging activities, younger couples being averse to "swingers" because of its connotations. 'Selective swinging' events include mostly childless, unmarried young graduates whose average ages are as low as the late 20s, whereas traditional swingers events have average ages in the 40s. Selective parties are often referred to as "exclusive" or "elitist." Despite the assumption that such organisations are not associated with groups propagating "family values," the Fever parties were revealed in June 2003 to be organized by a senior coordinator of a British Conservative Party
Conservative Party (UK)

The Conservative and Unionist Party, more commonly known as the Conservative Party, is a conservative political party in the United Kingdom....
 pressure group, Conservatives for Change, older than the maximum age allowed to attend his events. The acceptance of singles varies by area and event. Some clubs (including parties and private events) allow only couples and females, but some allow single
Single (relationship)

In Interpersonal relationship, a single person is one who is not marriage or in a Love relationship.Single people may engage in courtship to find a Domestic partner or spouse....
 men
MEN

The abbreviation MEN can refer to:* Multiple endocrine neoplasia* Manchester Evening News* Manchester Evening News Arena* Ministry of National Education of the Republic of Poland - Ministerstwo Edukaji Narodowej...
 on selected nights. Single females are often admitted at reduced price.

Reasons against single males vary. Most but not all of the people in swinger events are male-female couples more interested in couples or single women than single men. Thus, swinger events strive to achieve a balance between male and female participants or have a slightly larger number of females.

A complaint is that single men change the tone of an event. While hostility towards single men is rare, an abundance of single males is not often looked upon favourably. When single males are permitted, their numbers are usually limited by high fees or stringent requirements.

Controversy and debate


Objections to the swinger lifestyle

Arguments made in opposition to the practice of swinging and partner swapping fall into two broad categories: first, objections based on the practical considerations of engaging in a swinging lifestyle, and second, moral or philosophical objections against the principles of swinging itself.

Practical objections
Common objections based on practical considerations include health dangers of multiple partners, pregnancy, and the risk of emotional attachments to sexual activity which may cause friction in a relationship.

Health dangers

A set of swingers play without condoms, called barebacking
Barebacking

Bareback is a slang term to describe acts of unprotected sex . The origin of the term is by analogy to riding a horse without a saddle....
. However, even among that population, there are sometimes other measures taken to lessen chance of transmission of STD's like exchange of STD test results. However, the majority promote their activities as safe sex
Safe sex

Safe sex is the practice of sexual activity in a manner that reduces the risk of infection with sexually transmitted diseases . Conversely, unsafe sex is the practice of sexual intercourse without regard for prevention of STDs....
 and will not engage with others who do not also practice safe sex. An informal survey of swingers, mostly from the UK, showed 73% practice safe sex. Proponents for swinging point to the fact that safe sex is accepted within the community and the risk of sexual disease is the same for the general population. Opponents argue that even protected sex is risky, especially in the light of the upsurge in sexually transmitted diseases
STD

STD may refer to:* Sexually Transmitted Disease* Doctor of Sacred Theology * S?o Tom? and Pr?ncipe dobra, the ISO 4217 code for the currency of S?o Tom? and Pr?ncipe...
 such as AIDS
AIDS

Acquired immune deficiency syndrome or acquired immunodeficiency syndrome is a disease of the human immune system caused by the HIV ....
, and the risk of pregnancy.

Emotional complications

Some who object assert that sexual relations, by their nature, have an emotional component. Since many swingers are in a committed relationship with one partner (see History above), sexual relations with a person outside the relationship could emotionally damage the committed couple. Intimacy might be diminished by sex with others and this may lead to the end of the relationship.

Another argument states that one partner may be more enthusiastic than the other, the less willing feeling pushed into taking part, leading to the break-up of the relationship or to psychological problems.

Proponents advocate that it is not swinging that caused the demise of the relationship but relationship issues brought to the surface by swinging. Therefore proponents argue couples considering swinging need to work through relationship issues and share an equal enthusiasm.

Moral and philosophical objections
Objections pertaining to the basic principles of swinging on a moral or philosophical basis may include the sacred nature of sexual relations between two persons, or the view that sexual relations should only occur within a committed relationship (sometimes stated as "only within a marriage"). Those invoking this reasoning may assert that in order to engage in a swinging relationship, one must degrade sexual relations to the most basic element of pleasure, which would be in violation of the sacred nature of sexual relationships. Some argue that if sex becomes the main reason for swinging, sex may become mechanistic and less satisfying than the intimacy experienced by monogamous couples.

Common responses to objections to the swinger lifestyle


Responses to practical objections
Many couples enter swinging while in secure relationships, providing added motivation to avoid excessive health risks. While sexual affairs outside relationships may be in the heat of the moment without regard to consequences, swingers maintain that sex among swingers is a more thought-out and practical affair.

Many swinging clubs in the US and UK do not have alcohol licenses and have a "bring your own beverage" (BYOB) policy. Also, it is not uncommon for experienced swingers to remain sober; these individuals may state that they take a safer approach to sexual health than comparable non-monogamous singles (who ostensibly have impaired judgment from becoming inebriated).

Condoms are required at most swinging clubs and parties. In addition, a minority of swingers rely on STD testing to ensure their safety. A small portion focus on massage and other activities unlikely to transmit STDs; however, most participants acknowledge they are accepting the risks that any sexually promiscuous member of society does.

Although there is a risk of pregnancy, there are ways to minimize the risk to almost zero. Solutions include a tubal liagation (female sterilization), vasectomy (male sterilization), or having a group entirely made of menopausal women. Other solutions include using condoms with another form of non-surgical birth control such as using the pill. Proper use of a condom with an effective birth control method will minimize the risk of pregnancy and transmission of sexually transmitted disease.

Some believe sexual attraction is part of human nature and should be openly enjoyed by a committed or married couple. Some swingers cite divorce data in the US, claiming the lack of quality of sex and spousal infidelity are significant factors in divorce. One study showed 37% of husbands and 29% of wives admit at least one extramarital affair (Reinisch, 1990), and divorce rates for first marriages approached 60%.

As one study asserted:
According to King (1996) sexual habituation leads to changes in interaction with partners. At three to seven years into a marriage, it takes increased stimulation to produce the sexual excitation previously obtained by a glance or simple touch. A couple receptive to new and different sexual experiences will begin to explore different avenues of shared sexual fulfillment to continue to grow together. At this stressful point infidelity increases and the divorce rate peaks. Couples who find a way to reconnect physically and emotionally are more likely to make it through this period. Swinging may be one solution – it provides sexual variety, adventure, and the opportunity to live out fantasies as a couple without secrecy and deceit.


Many swingers report that their relationships are strengthened through swinging, and say their sex lives are more intimate and satisfying. Jealousy can occur, but proponents of swinging assert that jealousy is mainly couples whose relationships were already unstable. The effect on unstable relationships has yet to be determined.

Finally some swingers advocate that swinging is about sex, physical aspect and relationship (marriage) is about love, emotional aspect. To swing the couple needs to differentiate and keep emotions out of swinging. This means not getting to know the third person and having a level of attraction between all members. Those who swing advocate that emotional feelings for the third is a signal that the relationship with the third needs to end.

Responses to moral and philosophical objections
Swingers provide a variety of responses to moral and philosophical objections. As with any community, the depth and type of spiritual philosophies varies. A common response to moral and philosophical objections is that there is a difference between sex and love. Contradictorily, this is one of the objections that religious groups have: that this distinction should not exist.

Swingers differentiate between fun and friendship, and the love and companionship provided by their existing relationship. Thus, though swingers may have many sexual relationships, only a single emotional relationship exists. Although close friendships are formed within the community, swingers often feel nothing is more important than their own partner. The friendships among swingers strengthen the primary relationship rather than damage it.

Swingers claim sex is more rather than less intimate because they are with a partner who encourages their fantasies; therefore, the partner is so confident that jealousy is not an issue. Swingers claim that swinging makes infidelity less likely, as they know they can have sexual contact with others with their partner's consent.

Various responses exist to those who object to swinging on the basis of faith. Many swingers feel their activities in their own homes or private clubs are not for others to judge. Others believe that as long as they consider their relationships sacred, playing does not contradict the sanctity and is consistent with spiritual values.

Two additional arguments are made. The first is that the couple defines cheating. As long as the couple has a definition and stays within their boundaries, no cheating has occurred. Secondly some argue that adultery is incongruent with the original definition. The original stated that adultery occurred if a married woman had sex outside marriage. It excluded a married man who had sex with a single, not married, woman or single women.

Swinging in popular culture


Film

  • In the film The Blood Oranges
    The Blood Oranges

    Blood Oranges is a 1997 in film erotic drama film directed by Philip Haas. This was Haas? third feature film, which is based on the 1972 erotic cult novel by John Hawkes....
    (1997), two western couples, one with children, come together in the fictional Mediterranean village of Ilyria. The film was adapted from the novel by John Hawkes
    John Hawkes

    John Hawkes, born John Clendennin Talbot Burne Hawkes, Jr. , was a Postmodernism United States novelist, known for the intensity of his work, which suspended the traditional constraints of the narrative....
    .


  • The film Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice
    Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice

    This article is about the 1969 film. For the 1973 television series based on this film, see Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice .'Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice' is a 1969 in film comedy-drama film directed by Paul Mazursky....
    (1969) is the American comedy classic that captures the sexual revolution of the late 1960s in the United States. It was nominated for four Academy Awards; Best Actor in a Supporting Role, Best Actress in a Supporting Role, Best Cinematography, and Best Original Screenplay.


  • The film Eating Raoul
    Eating Raoul

    Eating Raoul is a 1982 in film black comedy about a conservative married couple living in Hollywood who take to killing swinging for their money....
    (1982) is a comic send-up of swinging stereotypes.


  • The documentary film
    Documentary film

    Documentary film is a broad category of visual expression that is based on the attempt, in one fashion or another, to "document" reality. Although "documentary film" originally referred to movies shot on film stock, it has subsequently expanded to include video and new media productions that can be either direct-to-video or made for a televis...
     
    The Lifestyle: Swinging in America, a 2000 film by director David Schisgall, took an in-depth look at several true-life swinging couples.


  • The film The Ice Storm
    The Ice Storm

    The Ice Storm is a 1994 in literature United States novel by Rick Moody. The novel was widely acclaimed by readers and critics alike, hailed as a funny, acerbic, and moving hymn to a dazed and confused era of American life....
    (1997) by director Ang Lee features a cheating husband, played by Kevin Kline, and his long suffering wife, played by Joan Allen, who attend a "key party" during a nasty ice storm.


  • The recent Bollywood
    Bollywood

    Bollywood is the informal term popularly used for the Mumbai-based Hindi film industry in India. The term is often used to refer to the whole of Cinema of India....
     film by Rajat Kapoor
    Rajat Kapoor

    Rajat Kapoor is an Indian actor and director born in 1961. He has acted in many successful films like Dil Chahta Hai, Monsoon Wedding, Corporate and Bheja Fry....
     called
    Mixed Doubles has tried to portray a humorous outlook to this concept on the Indian scene.


  • PlayCouples, a 2003 feature-length documentary
    Documentary film

    Documentary film is a broad category of visual expression that is based on the attempt, in one fashion or another, to "document" reality. Although "documentary film" originally referred to movies shot on film stock, it has subsequently expanded to include video and new media productions that can be either direct-to-video or made for a televis...
     directed by Michael A. Bloom, has been called "the most complete and honest explanation of The Lifestyle I have yet to see" by Dr. Robert McGinley, founder of The Lifestyle Organization.
  • SwingStock
    Swingstock

    Swingstock is an annual summer camp for swinging that takes place in the United States.The couples-only and adults-only camp has been running since 1988, with the exception of one summer....
    , has been featured on HBO's Real Sex and Playboy Channel Sexcetera.


  • Mimi Rogers' character Sharon, in the 1991 film The Rapture
    The Rapture (film)

    The Rapture is a 1991 in film psychological/religious drama film starring Mimi Rogers, David Duchovny, Darwyn Carson, Patrick Bauchau, Marvin Elkins, Will Patton, and Stephanie Menuez; directed by Michael Tolkin; rated R; 100 minutes long; and produced by New Line Cinema....
    , pursues an active swinging lifestyle with her 'partner', played by Rustam Branaman. Several of the key characters are introduced into the plot when they join Rogers and Branaman for group sex after meeting in a bar one night.


  • The film The Sex Monster
    The Sex Monster

    The Sex Monster is a 1999 United States comedy film Film director and screenwriter by Mike Binder....
    (1999) is a comedy about a couple who begin a ménage à trois
    Ménage à trois

    M?nage ? trois is the French language term describing a relationship or domestic arrangement in which three people share a sexual relationship....
     with another woman.


  • The film Zebra Lounge
    Zebra Lounge

    Zebra Lounge is a 2001 erotic thriller directed by Kari Skogland and written by Claire Montgomery and Monte Montgomery....
    (2001) talks about swinging and its effects on the lives of a married couple with kids who seek some sexual adventures.


  • The Dutch film Swingers
    Swingers (2002 film)

    Swingers is a Dutch feature film released in 2002 and tells the story of a thirty-something couple Diana and Julian and their experiment in swinging....
    (2002) tells the story of a thirty-something couple and their first experiments with the swinging lifestyle.


  • The film The Fourth Protocol (film)
    The Fourth Protocol

    The Fourth Protocol is a novel written by Frederick Forsyth and published in August 1984....
    shows a brief clip of four American women and an American airman naked in a room. The swinger overtones were very implicit.


Literature

  • In John Irving
    John Irving

    John Winslow Irving is an United States novelist and Academy Awards-winning screenwriter.Irving achieved critical and popular acclaim after the international success of The World According to Garp in 1978....
    's novel
    The 158-Pound Marriage
    The 158-Pound Marriage

    John Irving's third and perhaps darkest novel, The 158-Pound Marriage examines the sexual revolution-era trend of 'swinging' via a glimpse into the lives of two couples in a small New England college town who enter casually into such an affair, with disastrous consequences....
    , two New England college professors and their wives enter a ménage à quatre with disastrous consequences.


  • Ewan Morrison's debut 2007 novel "Swung" centres on a Glasgow couple who try swinging, to mixed reviews.


  • Harmon Leon
    Harmon Leon

    Harmon Leon is an American journalist and humorist. He is an author of six books, a filmmaker, and has done some stand-up comedy comedy. He has contributed to Esquire, Wired Magazine, Salon.com, National Lampoon , Maxim, National Geographic and National Public Radio....
     wrote about infiltrating the world of swingers in his book, The American Dream. He went undercover and lived the swinger lifestyle.


Television

  • The BBC2 interviewer and documentary maker Louis Theroux investigated an American Swingers group in an episode of his Louis Theroux's Weird Weekends
    Louis Theroux's Weird Weekends

    Louis Theroux's Weird Weekends is a television show television documentary series, in which Louis Theroux gives viewers the chance to get brief glimpses into the worlds of individuals and groups that they would not normally come into contact with or experience up close....
    series.


  • An episode of the BBC television programme Life on Mars
    Life on Mars (TV series)

    Life on Mars is a British Academy Television Award and Emmy-winning British science fiction and police drama British television series. It was first broadcast on BBC One between January 2006 and April 2007....
    featured the main characters infiltrating a swinger club.


  • In an episode on the first season of the FOX
    Fox

    A fox is an animal belonging to any one of about 27 species of small to medium-sized Canidae, characterized by possessing a long, narrow snout, and a bushy tail, or brush....
     series
    The OC, Sandy
    Sandy Cohen

    Sanford "Sandy" Cohen is a fictional character on the Fox Broadcasting Company series The O.C.. He is portrayed by Peter Gallagher.Sandy, a lawyer, raconteur, and son of Sophie Cohen , is married to Kirsten Cohen....
     and Kirsten Cohen
    Kirsten Cohen

    Kirsten Cohen is a fictional character on the Fox Broadcasting Company television series The O.C.. She is portrayed by Canadian actress Kelly Rowan....
     are tricked into attending a swinger's party on New Year's Eve.


  • Touch And Go, a 1998 BBC Two drama, focussed on a young couple, played by Martin Clunes
    Martin Clunes

    Alexander Martin Clunes is a BAFTA Awards and Screen Actors Guild Awards award-winning England actor and comedian....
     and Zara Turner
    Zara Turner

    Zara Turner is a British actress....
     visiting a swinging club in order to reinvigorate their marriage. After initial success, their marriage is threatened by the pressures of their new lifestyle.


  • The Good Son, an episode of the Fox sitcom That 70's Show featured Red
    Red Forman

    Reginald Albert "Red" Forman is a fictional character on the FOX TV series That '70s Show. Red Forman was played by Kurtwood Smith....
     and Kitty
    Kitty Forman

    Katherine Anne "Kitty" Forman is a fictional character on the Fox Broadcasting Company That '70s Show. She is played by comic actress Debra Jo Rupp....
     inadvertently attending a swinger's party.


  • A 2000 episode of the series Yes, Dear
    Yes, Dear

    Yes, Dear is a television sitcom which aired from 2000 to 2006 on CBS. It starred Anthony Clark , Jean Louisa Kelly, Mike O'Malley and Liza Snyder....
     ("The Good Couple") featured two of the main characters, Greg and Kim, inadvertently becoming social with a swinging couple.


  • 2008 CBS series Swingtown
    Swingtown

    Swingtown was an American television series created by Mike Kelley as a midseason replacement series for CBS. The show was a Period piece and relationship Television drama about the impact of sexual and social liberation in 1970s American suburban households, with story arcs involving open marriages and key party....
    is a period piece which deals with social and sexual changes of the 1970s, including swinging.


  • An episode of the comedy, Just Shoot Me featured a confusion between swingers and swing dancers.


  • In the second series of Sugar Rush (TV series)
    Sugar Rush (TV series)

    Sugar Rush is a critically acclaimed United Kingdom television comedy drama series developed by Shine Limited and broadcast by Channel 4, based on the Julie Burchill Sugar Rush....
    Stella and Nathan both experiment in the swinger lifestyle, ending in a visit to a club in Brighton.


  • In "Winterland", the eighth episode of Journeyman
    Journeyman (TV series)

    Journeyman is a 2007 United States science fiction television drama created by Kevin Falls for 20th Century Fox Television which aired on the NBC television network....
    , Dan Vasser
    Dan Vasser

    Daniel "Dan" Vasser is a fictional character on the critically acclaimed United States drama Journeyman . He is played by Scotland actor Kevin McKidd....
    , the protagonist of the show, travels back to 1973 along with Livia and finds themselves in a swinging party.


Podcasts

  • Swingercast produces shows relevant to swinging. It was the first podcast to be inducted into the Kinsey Institute and offers insight from a real couple's perspective.


Ethnology of "swinging"


Africa

Temporary spouse-trading is practiced as an element of ritual initiation into a secret society in the French Congo through "wife exchange" : "you shall lay with the priestess-wife of your Lemba Father, and he shall lay with your wife too."

New Guinea

Among the Orya of northern Irian Jaya, the agama to?kat (Indonesian for 'walking-stick') cult "encouraged men to trade wives, i.e., to have sexual relations with each other’s wives. This trading of sexual favors ... was only between pairs of families, ... adherents are now very secretive concerning cult activities and teachings." In this 'walking-stick' cult "the walking stick ...
dute is the term men use to refer to the husband of the woman who becomes his sexual partner." Furthermore, "There have been other similar movements ... near Jayapura. These are popularly called Towel Religion (agama handuk) and The Simpson Religion (agama simpson)." Among the Mimika of southern Irian Jaya, temporary spouse-trading is said to have been originated by a woman who had returned from the world of the dead : "The wife says to her husband, '... tonight I will sleep in the house of the headman ..., and ... his wife, will sleep in your house. Because I have been dead ..., tonight I am going to do for the first time what people have been looking forward to (for so long). I am going to institute the papisj, wife exchange.'"

Philippines

In Luzon, "The Gaddang recognize spouse exchange".

Eskimo

"Eskimo wife trading has often been reported and commented on ..."

South American Indians

Among the Araweté (Asurini) in the state of Pará, Brazil, "spouse-swapping" is practiced.

See also

  • Biphobia
    Biphobia

    Biphobia is a term used to describe fear of and aversion toward bisexuality and bisexuals as a social group or as individuals. People of any sexual orientation can experience such feelings of fear and aversion....
  • BDSM
    BDSM

    BDSM is a complex acronym derived from the terms Bondage and Discipline , Dominance and submission , Sadomasochism and masochism . BDSM includes a wide spectrum of activities and forms of interpersonal relationships....
  • Contact magazine
    Contact magazine

    A contact magazine is a type of classified magazine that is largely or wholly dedicated to personal ads. As well as publishing the personal ads, the publishers of contact magazines often run an anonymous mail forwarding service that allowes advertisers to identify themselves only with box numbers....
  • Cuckolding
  • Dogging
    Dogging (sexual slang)

    Dogging is a United Kingdom euphemism for engaging in sexual acts in a semi-public place or watching others doing so. Frequently, there are more than two participants; both group sex and gang banging can be included....
  • Dominant cuckold
    Dominant cuckold

    In many sexual sub-cultures, being a cuckold is often associated with being submissive, but in the case of the Dominant Cuckold the man is dominant and the woman is submissive....
  • Gang bang
    Gang bang

    A gang bang is a situation in which a person has sexual intercourse with multiple partners in turn or at the same time....
  • Group sex
    Group sex

    Group sex is sexual behaviour involving more than two participants at the same time. The main focus of this page is group sex among humans; however, group sex also exists with other species in the animal kingdom - e.g., bighorn sheep and bonobos....
  • Human sexuality
    Human sexuality

    Human sexuality is how people experience and express themselves as sexual beings. Human sexuality has many aspects. Biology, sexuality refers to the reproductive mechanism as well as the basic biological drive that exists in all species and can encompass sexual intercourse and sexual contact in all its forms....
  • Human sexual behavior
    Human sexual behavior

    Human sexual behavior or human sexual practices refers to the manner in which humans experience and express their human sexuality. It encompass a wide range of activities such as strategies to find or attract partners , interactions between individuals, physical intimacy or emotional intimacy, and sexual contact....
  • List of sexology topics
    List of sexology topics

    This is a list of topics related to sexology, human sexuality and marriage customs, and related topics such as human sexual anatomy, reproductive biology, andrology, gynaecology, obstetrics and, where relevant, anthropology....
  • List of subcultures
    List of subcultures

    This is a list of subcultures....
  • Ménage à trois
    Ménage à trois

    M?nage ? trois is the French language term describing a relationship or domestic arrangement in which three people share a sexual relationship....
  • Promiscuity
    Promiscuity

    In human sexual behaviour, promiscuity denotes casual sex between many partners. Behavior includes sex with partners who are not one's spouse. It is common in some animal species....
  • Sex club
    Sex club

    BackgroundSex clubs are clubs where people can have sexual intercourse with one another in public areas. The term can also be used more generally to refer to establishments such as a gay bathhouse where sexual activity often takes place in private rooms....
  • The 158-Pound Marriage
    The 158-Pound Marriage

    John Irving's third and perhaps darkest novel, The 158-Pound Marriage examines the sexual revolution-era trend of 'swinging' via a glimpse into the lives of two couples in a small New England college town who enter casually into such an affair, with disastrous consequences....


External links

  • (describes legal situation, and gives lengthy defense of swinging)
  • On Adaptive Functions of Long-Term and Short-Term Romantic Relationships