Sketches from Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Encyclopedia
The following is a list of sketches
which debuted on Late Night with Conan O'Brien
on NBC
.
] Edition" with "2.0" added for guests who have done the sketch more than once. In 2006, the naming format was changed to simply "The [guest's name] Edition". Its introduction is as follows:
Conan: "... It's time, once again, to look into the future."
Andy/Guest: "The future, Conan?"
Conan: "That's right, Andy/[Guest's name]. Let's look to the future, all the way to the year 2000!"
During an "In the Year 2000" sketch, O'Brien, Andy/Guest, as well as band member Richie "LaBamba" Rosenberg, each wears a black robe, futuristic-looking collar and hold a lit flashlight to their face. Between La Bamba's high falsetto wails of "In the year 2000...", O'Brien and Andy/Guest alternate delivering jokes, often based on current events, in the form of humorous predictions of what will happen in the year 2000. Quite commonly, the second-to-last prediction involves Conan mocking his guest, while the last prediction involves the guest mocking Conan in return. This sketch is very similar to one Conan performed with the Happy Happy Good Show
in 1988.
The sketch was invented prior to the actual year 2000, but the show's writers decided to keep the named year the same even after the passing of the titular year, in a sort of ironic twist. However, when the sketch was revived on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
, Richter heaped ridicule upon O'Brien for failing to update the name of the skit nine years after the year 2000 had passed. The sketch is renamed "In the Year 3000", with the black robe (referred to as a 'ratty smock' by Richter) being replaced with a more futuristic-looking outfit consisting of a large metallic collar with a series of blinking lights, which Conan said were very expensive to make and Andy said smelled bad. Appearing on Tonight June 3, 2009, it was the first Late Night sketch to be carried over to the Tonight Show. The open to the sketch included narration by William Shatner
and, on one occasion, George Takei
.
wrote "want to be informed." Meredith Vieira
wrote "want to be my friend." Tony Danza
wrote "have broken both arms and can't change the channel;" A running joke has the survey frequently including a question which is answered by O.J. Simpson somehow referring to committing murder. To the question: "My favorite time of day is..." Evangeline Lilly
wrote: "Dawn." Matt Lauer
wrote "Twilight". O. J. Simpson
wrote: "Murder O'Clock." A reply where Paris Hilton
is the final respondent to a question has been used in every segment for at least the last four years, usually about her promiscuous dating habits. O'Brien and bandleader Max Weinberg
have been used as well, with answers that perceive O'Brien as a loser and Max as a pervert. Another running gag has both Larry King
and Kirstie Alley
answering, usually poking fun at Larry King's age and Kirstie Alley's weight.
Reintroduced on The Tonight Show
on June 5, 2009.
telenovela
parody
, which Conan announces that they have made specifically for the NBC-owned
Telemundo
Spanish network. Conando (Conan with a fake mustache) is the hero of the piece, fighting mild villains to save the damsel in distress in most episodes. Each episode features a dramatic entrance, to which the villains bewilderedly ask "¿Conando?", the damsel swoons "¡Conando!" and to which Conan even more wildly replies "¡Si! ¡Conando!" In almost every sketch, Conando defenestrates the villains, making extensive use of stock footage. Quite often the sketch would include ridiculous phrases which you would not often use in daily conversation, but are common in Spanish-learning texts. On occasion, the sketch would include long and complicated speeches which are obviously and extremely voiced-over.
Reintroduced on Tonight June 8, 2009, and performed many times on Tonight, Richter is introduced as Conando's sidekick Nachito, who always shows up when Conando is about to make love
to the damsel, thus spoiling the mood. In one sketch, the damsel did not end up with Conando but rather Mario Lopez
.
Reintroduced on Tonight June 16, 2009, and later reintroduced again on Conan on June 21, 2011.
In September 2009 the Audiency Awards hit a 'high' when one of the audience members turned out to be one of NORML's Board of Directors and Missouri NORML Executive Director, Dan Viets - who was also nominated for being "..most likely to be the professor at your college who can definitely get you weed."
being played by Ralph Wiggum
, Patrick Star
, or a deer in the headlights, Joe Biden
being played by Bob Barker
, Hillary Clinton being played by Chucky, Condoleezza Rice
being played by Snoop Dogg
, Donald Rumsfeld
being played by Skeletor
, and Dick Cheney
being played by The Penguin.
Reintroduced on June 17, 2009.
s. The stamps are usually states based on people or current events. The state quarters insult the state they are based on, and the Euros insult the country they are based on. One such Euros skit led to the creation of Conan O'Brien Hates My Homeland.
The new coins sketch was reintroduced on Tonight July 13, 2009.
have recently had a party and Conan displays the ridiculous and fictional events of this party. These events typically include heavy drinking and rather gory violence or homicide on the part of one or the entire cast. Towards the end of the bit they are always joined by a celebrity, played by an actor with a superimposed picture of the celebrity at hand. The celebrity usually ends up getting into a fight with Conan, Joel, or Max, or is seen in compromising positions and/or situations, always looking back at the camera with exactly the same look, since the superimposed picture never changes. Before his death, Carl "Oldie" Olsen, played by William Preston, was usually in the party instead of Joel Godard.
Reintroduced on Tonight July 21, 2009, featuring only Conan and Andy, and their trip to the beach.
, and his healthy eating habits. During the interview Conan found Schlanksy to be totally unfazed by his bosses jokes or wild antics, reacting to most jokes with a poker face. At the end of the segment, Conan thanked Schlansky, commenting that "I can't believe you're a real person." The positive reaction to the Schlansky interview led to an episode where Jordan and Conan had dinner at an Italian restaurant, with Conan purposefully trying to annoy and embarrass Jordan throughout the bit. Jordan remained unresponsive to Conan's behavior. When O'Brien moved from New York to Los Angeles, most of his staff came with him and found places to live, except for Jordan. Conan and a realtor helped Jordan find a house, with Conan again trying to annoy and embarrass Jordan the whole time. The sketches grew increasingly aggressive over the years with Conan making more pointed criticisms of Schlansky's sophisticated tastes and purported homosexuality.
, he mentioned that the movie had scenes that were disgusting and weird. A scene then appeared where a couple
ran and were surprised by a dinosaur
which opened its mouth to roar. Late Night edited the couple's lost child into the dinosaur's mouth, and the child says "hello" to the parents. The sketch occasionally reviewed TV shows. For example, Conan poked fun at the then-new television series Viva Laughlin
claiming the producers missed some key signals of the show's poor quality. A clip of the show featuring one of its musical numbers appeared interspersed with footage of a "crew member" who, horrified at how terrible the show is, suddenly activates a TNT detonator and the scene switches to stock footage of an imploding building.
Reintroduced on Tonight Aug. 4, 2009.
is on the scene and cuts to him via a remote feed, similar to the Daily Show in that McCann is standing in front of an obvious greenscreen backdrop. McCann then gives an increasingly absurd report that involves a variety of gags, such as the backdrop turning into a slideshow of various landmarks as McCann attempts to convince Conan he's taking a tour, or McCann wearing a pants suit and blond wig in a report about Hillary Clinton. McCann becomes increasingly annoying as the report continues, frustrating Conan, who wanders off his part of the screen and quickly shows up in McCann's screen and knocks him out with a breakaway chair. The camera angle shifts to show the green screen was right next to where Conan was, and McCann pretending to be passed out. Conan then begins to make fun of his acting and wonder if he will lie there for the rest of the bit. Although he usually remains motionless, sometimes this prompts McCann to either smile or, in some cases, sheepishly stand up and leave as Conan continues to make fun of him.
Brian has also done a remote feed of sporting events, such as NBA Finals
and U.S. Open
, where he had Kevin Garnett
, Doc Rivers
, and Tiger Woods
to interview, though they did not appear on screen. But at the end, the interviewees come out, partially hiding themselves, but only to reveal that it is actually Pierre Bernard. Then Conan would knock out McCann with an object.
When reintroduced on Tonight Aug. 24, 2009, Conan did not hit McCann with a chair. Instead, McCann just walked out of his shot and into Conan's (a running gag in the satellite interview sketch), followed by Bernard, who portrayed the Obama family off screen, and an elderly man playing Brett Favre
who appeared earlier in the broadcast.
is invited by Conan to sing a song about a current event. Pender begins normally, but upon reaching the refrain, he loses control, climbing over the railing into the audience, eventually writhing around on the floor wailing "baby" over and over again until Conan finally stops him. The rhythm of the song is typically the same, with different lyrics each time.
Reintroduced on Tonight August 28, 2009, when it was incorporated into the "Conan, Please Blow Up My Car" contest.
) appears in the short hallway to the right of the set, and 'interrupts' Conan. Conan and The Interrupter have a conversation, where every line is started by Conan and finished by The Interrupter (until the very end, where the roles are reversed). The entire conversation focuses upon the Interrupter's seedy and highly unusual private life, involving such details as The Interrupter's parents trying to disown him or something of a sexual nature, such as sneaking into Home Depot after hours to smell bags of 'sexually arousing' peat moss.
Reintroduced on September 3, 2009.
Reintroduced on November 23, 2009 when Max returned from his tour with Bruce Springsteen. The topic of the first return sketch was soccer.
's Headlines
segment on The Tonight Show
in which Leno finds humorous mistakes in various newspapers. Conan's bit takes regular newspaper ads and stories and adds blatantly fake text; for example, an ad depicting a leather living room couch was modified to include a cartoon cow exclaiming, "How's my ass feel, you son of a bitch?", or an ad for a new home, labeling one of the rooms as "The Room You Will Die In." Adding to the humor, Conan repeatedly insists that his ads are real, commenting "you can't make this stuff up, why would you, that would waste everybody's time." This sketch appeared on the show's very first episode in September 1993.
Other stamps are often used to abruptly punctuate various one-off sketches, including words such as "Alone", "Liar", "Sad", and "Small Penis". Another sketch on Tonight ended with an "Admirable" stamp after Barack Obama
called the work of AFTRA members "admirable" in a video. Otherwise, these sketches bear no particular resemblance to the standard recurring "Ass Stamp" sketch.
A variation of the ass stamp appeared on Conan's new show on TBS in 2011 during the NFL playoffs where Conan and Andy are trying to feign an interest in the NFL playoffs and afterward, a stamp appears over the two of them calling them "GIRLS". This happened again during the Stanley Cup Playoffs when Conan said he was cheering for the Boston Bruins, since Conan is from Boston. Andy then called him out on it, saying he's never heard about him talk about hockey before. Andy then quizzed him on who the coach was, name a forward, the goalie, etc., and then asked who the Assistant Equipment Manager was, and then ridiculous ones like Vice-President of Corporate Partnerships. Eventually, Conan got one wrong and Conan was stamped as a "PHONY A-HOLE".
saying "I was convinced that the 'MC' in MC Hammer
's name stood for Michael Caine. When I found out it didn't, I destroyed his career." Another featured Alex Trebek
taking a drink, and admitting he had a "potent potables" problem. When Gwyneth Paltrow
appeared on the sketch she admitted that anytime before she starts a new film she kills a hobo with a hammer, as well as admitting an affinity for porn. When U2
appeared on the sketch, they admitted they were not Irish
. When Senator John McCain
ran for president in 2008
, Conan began replaying his secrets segments, which included McCain plugging "The McCain-Feingold Singles Guide to Portland."
after mocking that nation in another recurring skit, New Euros, where the joke was an image on a Ukrainian Euro Coin depicting a man in Eastern European dress with four arms, holding up seventeen fingers, with the caption on the coin saying "Over 17 years since the Chernobyl Accident". O'Brien was unaware that his show was even airing in Ukraine. So the premise of "Conan O'Brien Hates My Homeland" is that O'Brien, in an effort to find out where else the show is being aired without his knowledge, reads fast-paced insults of each of the nation
s of the world in alphabetical order http://conan.kary.ca/, with the expectation that angry mail will come pouring in from offended viewers in countries where the show is broadcast. O'Brien insults 5 countries (with a bell ringing between each one) each time the bit airs. A sample insult: Georgia
: Where Europe meets Asia and says "Hey, why don't we both dump our crap here?" Announcer Joel Godard then tells insulted viewers around the world a real address to send their angry letters. On August 9, 2007, Zimbabwe
was the last country to be featured, thus ending the sketch after three years.
s were supposedly received, which apparently "forced" Conan to give Finland a formal apology. Conan then went as far as to have the flag of Finland
shown in the background during a speech and slandered the Finns' "hated" neighbor Sweden with a sign saying "Sweden Sucks!" printed over the flag of Sweden
. In 2006, the Finland antics increased. While talking to fans before the show, Conan met two Finnish fans who commented that he resembled their President, a woman named Tarja Halonen
. Amused that his show was even airing in Finland, Conan made frequent references to his resemblance to Halonen, even putting her picture beside a live feed of his head. Upon learning that Halonen was running for reelection, Conan went so far as to film a segment of the show which took the form of a campaign commercial for the President. When Halonen won she jokingly gave O'Brien part of the credit and offered to meet him if he ever came to Finland. This inspired an episode where Conan did travel to Finland where he was given a hero's welcome at the airport, met with Tarja Halonen, participated in Lapplander folk rituals, and sought out an ordinary Finnish fan who had written a letter to the show.
? That charismatic scene-stealer is Epps-tastic!" or "Tell that group, "don't stop the 'tastic!") Then, Conan reminds viewers he will also be doing his usual "hilarious monologue", the camera shows that the man prepares to do his bit, but changes his mind. Conan also mentions the show's "zany, off-the-wall comedy bits", and the man either already stopped paying attention and/or begun torturing himself. (Examples: reading a disturbing or uninteresting book or newspaper article, drinking bleach or drilling his teeth.) Conan then questions the man, asking if he just likes the guests but "thinks everything else we do is crap?" or some other negative word. The man will then finish with "not crap, craptastic!"
Webcam
Manatee
" was featured - a manatee in front of a computer, dancing to the Divinyls
' "I Touch Myself
", being watched remotely by trumpeter Mark Pender
. Conan, in an ad-libbed statement, mentioned that the character appeared on the, at the time fictitious, web site "HornyManatee.com". The next night, Conan told viewers that if he mentions a web site which does not exist the NBC corporate policy is to buy the domain name lest someone else use it and potentially make NBC liable for the site's content. Conan said Late Night decided to use the domain name to create an actual web site, giving it the appearance of a fake porn site. With http://www.HornyManatee.com (no longer operational), Conan asked viewers to submit pictures to the page. Since that night, Conan has periodically given viewers an "update" on the website's status, mentioning its hit count and several fan submitted images, poems, and other media pouring in. Conan also used the updates as lead ins for special, on-stage Horny Manatee segments. For example, Conan called on James Lipton
to dramatically recite the fan-made poetry, then dance with the Manatee on air at his own request, and flew the Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
-based pop-punk duo Rocket Me Nowhere to New York to perform their tribute song "My Hopeless Manatee".
The last time Conan stated site's hit count (Jan. 18, 2007), it was "20 million hits" and counting. In an interview with New York Times, O'Brien has also said that he was overwhelmed at the viewer response.
As of December 16, 2006, the site has achieved an Alexa
website ranking of about 31,000,000,
over thirty times the rank for SaveTheManatee.org (about 937,000),
to which Late Night is donating some proceeds of its "Horny Manatee" T-shirts offered on the site.
Currently, traffic to the website is routed to NBC's main site.
and Osama Bin Laden
("two of the most hated people in the world") were to have a child, it would be Steve Bartman
. Another notable example; Paris Hilton
and her pet chihuahua would create George W. Bush
.
) begin to berate Conan invariably for showing up to an event 'completely plastered' insisting on feminine activities and in some way or another ruining food or drink that's to be served. Conan drinks hard liquor while being yelled at and looking insecure. The sketch always ends with the bartender, Joe, demanding Conan pay the money he owes. Conan stands up, screams, "I'LL PAY WHEN I'M GOOD AND READY!", and hurls his drink against the wall, often returning to break a stool over the bartender and patron
plays. The bear would then usually be given electric shocks by his human handlers. Despite repeated instances of masturbation, the Masturbating Bear would continue to be invited back on Late Night. Once, the bear was revealed to be Chuck Norris in costume.
During the last week of Conan's run on Late Night, Conan declared the bear was too risque for 11:30 and tried to retire the bear by encasing him in carbonite, a la Han Solo
. This drew a protest from Carrie Fisher
, who subsequently freed the bear. The bear was last seen sailing away on a boat with Fisher until he reappeared on The Tonight Show on January 20, 2010 in the wake of the controversy surrounding Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien, which saw O'Brien's departure. Originally, it was thought NBC would be able to claim the Masturbating Bear as intellectual property
. As a result, he was transformed into the Self-Pleasuring Panda for O'Brien's tour.
When O'Brien took his TBS show to New York City for a week in 2011, the bear was, in one episode, depicted as being out of show business and settling down with a wife and two children in the New York suburbs. After a brief video reel revealed such, the bear was invited on stage to a cheering audience. However, Conan's words about the size of the audience became too much for the bear, who stripped out of his business attire and began to pleasure himself both on stage and on hanging rafters above.
Pope (Brian McCann). New additions are often more ridiculous than ones before, such as the Nudist Who Has No Skeleton or the Screeching Raccoon with a Jet Pack. Some are popular enough to warrant a second appearance, though few are actually made into recurring characters. Generally the new characters are absurdist in nature and carry names which fully describe their appearance or concept, sometimes extending to full multi phrase sentences. For example, one recurring character was "Gorilla Nurse Using an Old Fashioned Abdominal Exerciser While Listening to 'Angel of the Morning' by Juice Newton" a character which consisted simply of a stuffer gorilla in a nurses costume being vibrated by an old abdominal exerciser while the titular music played. A related gag also exists where Conan promises that he will not waste the audience's time with zany, random jokes, only to introduce a completely zany, random character. Notable characters from this bit include Fidel Castro
Rabbit DJ
, Nation of Twain
, Man protected from three-inch bees, Hippie fire hydrant on a skateboard
, Cactus
Chef Playing "We Didn't Start the Fire
" on the Flute and the Oscillating Air Purifier that Looks Like Slash
, and R2
–Mr. T
2. Another version is "New College Mascots", which feature fake mascots which often make fun of a real college or its surrounding area. One such skit featured an "FSU Webcam Manatee" which spawned the "Horny Manatee" sketch of December 2006. In the lead-up to his departure for the Tonight Show in early 2009, O'Brien brought back characters which would be inappropriate in the 11:30 PM time slot, such as the Masturbating Bear, which was frozen in carbonite, but subsequently rescued by Carrie Fisher
. The New York Daily News
reported on May 27, 2009 that O'Brien eventually plans to reintroduce the Masturbating Bear on Tonight.
, sci-fi-related, or similarly esoteric medium. At the end of his complaint he states "Bottom line, America..." as he grabs the handle of the recliner and shifts it back into an upright position to lean forward and point furiously at another camera centered on him to give his final geeky demands on the matter. Much of the humor of the sketch comes from the dry, emotionless manner in which Bernard delivers his "rage." A complaint about the TV show Stargate SG-1
led to him getting small cameos on the show; whereas a complaint about the Japanese anime franchise Robotech
numerous DVD releases in the marketplace prompted a "response" from robotech.com about the complaint and an offer to send Bernard a free complete collection of the DVDs.
In 2007, Bernard and O'Brien starred in a spin off sketch entitled "Pierre Bernard: Serial Killer." The sketch had been inspired by Bernard's real life refusal to allow the show to tape a remote segment at his home focusing on his sizable action figure collection. Conan insisted that the only explanation for Bernard's reluctance to allow a camera crew into his home was that the graphic designer was, in fact, a serial killer. During the sketch, O'Brien interviewed Bernard in the manner of news magazine shows such as Dateline NBC
, asking questions designed to implicate Bernard as a murderer. Initially, Bernard seemed reluctant but as the sketch went on he seemed to get more into the act. At one point, Bernard admitted that he did not describe himself as prolific because "I haven't been killing for very long." After the taped portion of the sketch, Bernard was wheeled on stage on a gurney wearing a muzzle similar to Hannibal Lecter
in The Silence of the Lambs.
Pierre Bernard moved with O'Brien on The Tonight Show to continue as a graphic designer and occasional performer, first seen on June 3, 2009.
", showcasing the Muppet retching streams of liquid from its mouth. Perhaps the most famous puppet, both on and off the show, is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. On June 19, 2009, Triumph crossed over onto The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
.
analogies
based on current events. Although the newest SAT format has dropped analogies, the segment continues to be used in new episodes. A typical example: person who sees a pregnant woman : "you're glowing" :: person who sees a pregnant Nicole Ritchie : "who stuffed an avocado in that cocktail straw?" The sketch often ends with an analogy involving Paris Hilton
that falsely seems to be making a joke about her sexual history, for example: Final episode of "The Sopranos": lots of guys getting whacked resulting in messy loss of bodily fluids:: Paris Hilton: popular hotel heiress
. A TV screen is lowered down to the seat where the interviewed would actually sit. On the screen is a still image of a celebrity, with live video of the mouth of the back stage impersonator superimposed—because of this method, the fake interviews are also called the "Clutch Cargo
routine", after the 1959 cartoon, that is the most widely remembered user of Syncro-Vox
. Commonly impersonated celebrities are Arnold Schwarzenegger
(who almost always mentions his 'smash hit holiday classic', Jingle All the Way
, and makes lame comebacks such as "You're not even a movie!"), George W. Bush
, Barbara Bush
(who is given the gruff voice of a man from New Jersey), Bill Clinton
, Hillary Clinton and Martha Stewart
(either of whom if, nagged by Conan about a point she wishes to dismiss, will begin talking in a demonically deeper voice as her eyes glow red
), Michael Jackson
, Sammy Sosa
, Barry Bonds
, Rafael Palmeiro
, Donald Trump
, Saddam Hussein
, Tom Cruise
(who often shouts triumphantly and raises his fists or feet, in reference to his infamous "Couch Jumping Incident" on Oprah), Mike Tyson
, and Keith Richards
. Most of the impressions are done by either Robert Smigel
or Brian Stack
.
This bit was parodied, along with the entire show, on Robot Chicken
's Star Wars Special. Conan provided his own voice.
who first appeared on the August 6, 2007 show during a sketch. The sketch involved Conan nervously reacting to various band members shouting at him, only to learn they were being literal. For example, one band member shouted, "Conan, Duck!" and Conan dove for cover behind his desk, only to learn the band member was pointing out a duck was in the studio. Conan, noting the audience's apparently positive reaction to the duck, dubbed it Quackers. Two nights later, Quackers made a return appearance, during which the duck unexpectedly defecated on the studio floor and then rubbed its own beak in it as if eating, simultaneously prompting riotous laughter/howling from the audience and a horrified response from Conan, who referred to him as "Quackers the Shit-Eating Duck". The August 10 and September 4 shows included a "special announcement" about a new show coming to NBC, the family sitcom "Quackers the Shit-Eating Duck." Quackers also displays an ability to mug to the audience for applause. On the September 19 episode, Conan notes Quackers' popularity amongst viewers again and also mentions Quackers' popularity on YouTube. The episode also contains a clip of Quackers as an action star.
in early 2004, creating NBC Universal
. Conan noted that this purchase now allowed him to play clips from the show Walker, Texas Ranger
starring Chuck Norris
without paying any royalties
. The "Walker Texas Ranger Lever" was a prop lever which, when pulled, would cause a supposedly random clip from the TV show to play. The clips were nearly always taken out of context and usually involved either Norris performing some improbable feat of heroics, or a particularly despicable act of violence being committed by a villain. For example one clip involved Walker tasting the dirt in a random patch of land and determining that a plane had crashed there. Another involved a man exhorting a young boy to jump from a high ledge, insisting that he would catch the youth. Yet when the boy did jump the man stepped back allowing the child to hit the ground. The sketch would usually begin with Conan introducing the premise and then commenting that he did not intend to use the lever immediately, followed by his immediately pulling it. In most instances of the sketch, Conan would comment after at least one clip that the sketch was finished, after which he would pull the lever "one last time." After a clip is played, the camera would generally cut back to Conan for a, usually shocked, reaction. In late summer 2004, the bit seemed to have been retired as Chuck Norris
walked in and fired a prop gun at Conan. Norris also revealed his own lever and pulled it, playing a clip showing him mock-fighting Conan with martial arts
moves in the back of the studio. The lever did return on occasion in 2005. Notably, the premise of the bit was technically incorrect, since Walker was owned by CBS, Sony Pictures Television
, and a few other companies; Walker just ran on NBC Universal-owned USA Network
at the time. One of the last and most popular clips to be shown was part of a "spring cleaning" segment where they were airing jokes which they had previously developed but had not aired before. With the Walker clip Conan insisted that they had been too scared to air it when they had originally discovered it, explaining "Once you see it. You'll understand why." The clip in question involved a young Haley Joel Osment
informing the characters, in a rather cheerful manner, that "Walker told me I have AIDS
." When the camera cut back to the studio for a reaction shot, Conan simply stood up, walked to a corner of the stage where he stood for a few seconds as the audience reacted in amusement and shock, and then returned to his seat where he calmly introduced the commercial break.
The merger also led to the creation of two other short-lived triggers, a Knight Rider pull chain, and a Beverly Hills Cop
Theme button. Sometimes these were combined, such as playing the Beverly Hills Cop theme behind a Walker, Texas Ranger scene.
In 2007, the lever returned, playing clips from B-grade 1970s/1980s Norris
movies (a different movie each episode). This began with the Slaughter in San Francisco
Lever (which was used during the April/May run of shows in San Francisco); Breaker! Breaker!
, A Force of One
and The Octagon
have also been used.
The lever also sparked its share of the Colbert/O'Brien/Stewart feud
, once Norris started appearing with 2008 presidential candidate Mike Huckabee
and Conan took credit for the outcomes.
In the penultimate episode of the show Conan claimed that the lever was the most requested skit on the show by fans.
or science fiction
shows that Pierre understands and enjoys, such as Battlestar Galactica
. A previous version of this sketch was "Dumbing It Down For La Bamba", where Conan would use basic, often childish language when describing current events to the band's trombonist.
The countdown did not air on New Year's Eve in both 2005-06 and 2006–07, as these dates were on Saturday and Sunday night respectively. NBC carried live specials with Carson Daly
on these occasions. Another such special aired for 2007-08 (a Monday night); a writer's strike
meant Late Night could not have resumed its Central Time countdown that year in any event. As of 2008-09, the Carson Daly specials appear to have supplanted the special New Year's Tonight and Late Night episodes permanently (repeats of both shows now follow the live special).
Sketch comedy
A sketch comedy consists of a series of short comedy scenes or vignettes, called "sketches," commonly between one and ten minutes long. Such sketches are performed by a group of comic actors or comedians, either on stage or through an audio and/or visual medium such as broadcasting...
which debuted on Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Late Night with Conan O'Brien is an American late-night talk show hosted by Conan O'Brien that aired 2,725 episodes on NBC between 1993 and 2009. The show featured varied comedic material, celebrity interviews, and musical and comedy performances. Late Night aired weeknights at 12:37 am...
on NBC
NBC
The National Broadcasting Company is an American commercial broadcasting television network and former radio network headquartered in the GE Building in New York City's Rockefeller Center with additional major offices near Los Angeles and in Chicago...
.
Moral Outrage
In response to a recent news story, usually about misconduct, Conan speaks at length about his moral outrage, and his feeling of responsibility to remove this type of behavior from society; meanwhile, the camera occasionally makes brief cuts from Conan to Max. Conan may also speak of a dim-witted accomplice who aids the deviant in his exploits, after which the camera briefly cuts from Conan to LaBamba. Finally, Conan urges the public to expose such people using the show's address which, together with the heading "Shameless Adulterous Weasel" or the like, is superimposed over Max.In the Year 2000/3000
The sketch is typically performed with Richter participating, but after Richter left Late Night, the celebrity guest would participate (when Richter was scheduled as a guest, he would again take part). Each guest version would usually be titled "The [guest's surnameSurname
A surname is a name added to a given name and is part of a personal name. In many cases, a surname is a family name. Many dictionaries define "surname" as a synonym of "family name"...
] Edition" with "2.0" added for guests who have done the sketch more than once. In 2006, the naming format was changed to simply "The [guest's name] Edition". Its introduction is as follows:
Conan: "... It's time, once again, to look into the future."
Andy/Guest: "The future, Conan?"
Conan: "That's right, Andy/[Guest's name]. Let's look to the future, all the way to the year 2000!"
During an "In the Year 2000" sketch, O'Brien, Andy/Guest, as well as band member Richie "LaBamba" Rosenberg, each wears a black robe, futuristic-looking collar and hold a lit flashlight to their face. Between La Bamba's high falsetto wails of "In the year 2000...", O'Brien and Andy/Guest alternate delivering jokes, often based on current events, in the form of humorous predictions of what will happen in the year 2000. Quite commonly, the second-to-last prediction involves Conan mocking his guest, while the last prediction involves the guest mocking Conan in return. This sketch is very similar to one Conan performed with the Happy Happy Good Show
Happy Happy Good Show
Happy Happy Good Show was an improvisational comedy revue held at the Victory Gardens Studio Theater in Chicago during the summer of 1988. The cast and writers were largely made up of writers on strike from Saturday Night Live after the 1987–1988 season...
in 1988.
The sketch was invented prior to the actual year 2000, but the show's writers decided to keep the named year the same even after the passing of the titular year, in a sort of ironic twist. However, when the sketch was revived on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien is an American late-night talk show that featured Conan O'Brien as host from June 1, 2009 to January 22, 2010 as part of NBC's long-running Tonight Show franchise...
, Richter heaped ridicule upon O'Brien for failing to update the name of the skit nine years after the year 2000 had passed. The sketch is renamed "In the Year 3000", with the black robe (referred to as a 'ratty smock' by Richter) being replaced with a more futuristic-looking outfit consisting of a large metallic collar with a series of blinking lights, which Conan said were very expensive to make and Andy said smelled bad. Appearing on Tonight June 3, 2009, it was the first Late Night sketch to be carried over to the Tonight Show. The open to the sketch included narration by William Shatner
William Shatner
William Alan Shatner is a Canadian actor, musician, recording artist, and author. He gained worldwide fame and became a cultural icon for his portrayal of James T...
and, on one occasion, George Takei
George Takei
George Hosato Takei Altman is an American actor, author, social activist and former civil politician. He is best known for his role in the television series Star Trek and its film spinoffs, in which he played Hikaru Sulu, helmsman of the...
.
Celebrity Survey
In this sketch, Conan has supposedly sent out questionnaires to celebrities and he reads their replies. Conan reads a question and then recites the answer that each of three celebrities gave. The answers of the first two celebrities are ordinary "straight" answers. The third is the gag answer and often relates to something unseemly about the celebrity. For example, to the question: "I like to think of my viewers as people who..." Brian WilliamsBrian Williams
Brian Douglas Williams is the anchor and managing editor of NBC Nightly News, the evening news program of the NBC television network, a position he assumed in 2004...
wrote "want to be informed." Meredith Vieira
Meredith Vieira
Meredith Louise Vieira is an American journalist, television personality, and game show host. She is best known for her roles as the original moderator of the ABC talk program The View and co-host of the long-running NBC News morning news program, Today...
wrote "want to be my friend." Tony Danza
Tony Danza
Tony Danza is an American actor best known for starring on the TV series Taxi and Who's the Boss?, for which he was nominated for an Emmy Award and four Golden Globe Awards...
wrote "have broken both arms and can't change the channel;" A running joke has the survey frequently including a question which is answered by O.J. Simpson somehow referring to committing murder. To the question: "My favorite time of day is..." Evangeline Lilly
Evangeline Lilly
Evangeline Lilly is a Canadian actress, best known for her role as Kate Austen in the ABC drama, Lost.-Early life:...
wrote: "Dawn." Matt Lauer
Matt Lauer
Matthew Todd "Matt" Lauer . is an American television journalist best known as the host of NBC's The Today Show since 1997. He was previously a news anchor in New York and a local talk-show host in Boston, Philadelphia, Providence and Richmond...
wrote "Twilight". O. J. Simpson
O. J. Simpson
Orenthal James "O. J." Simpson , nicknamed "The Juice", is a retired American collegiate and professional football player, football broadcaster, and actor...
wrote: "Murder O'Clock." A reply where Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
Paris Whitney Hilton is an American businesswoman, heiress, and socialite. She is a great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton . Hilton is known for her controversial participation in a sex tape in 2003, and appearance on the television series The Simple Life alongside fellow socialite and childhood...
is the final respondent to a question has been used in every segment for at least the last four years, usually about her promiscuous dating habits. O'Brien and bandleader Max Weinberg
Max Weinberg
Max Weinberg is an American drummer and television personality, most widely known as the longtime drummer for Bruce Springsteen's E Street Band and as the bandleader for Conan O'Brien on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien.Weinberg grew up in suburban New Jersey...
have been used as well, with answers that perceive O'Brien as a loser and Max as a pervert. Another running gag has both Larry King
Larry King
Lawrence Harvey "Larry" King is an American television and radio host whose work has been recognized with awards including two Peabodys and ten Cable ACE Awards....
and Kirstie Alley
Kirstie Alley
Kirstie Louise Alley is an American actress known for her role in the TV show Cheers, in which she played Rebecca Howe from 1987–1993, winning an Emmy Award and a Golden Globe Award as the Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series in 1991...
answering, usually poking fun at Larry King's age and Kirstie Alley's weight.
Reintroduced on The Tonight Show
The Tonight Show
The Tonight Show is an American late-night talk show that has aired on NBC since 1954. It is the longest currently running regularly scheduled entertainment program in the United States, and the third longest-running show on NBC, after Meet the Press and Today.The Tonight Show has been hosted by...
on June 5, 2009.
Noches de Pasion con Señor O'Brien (Nights of Passion with Mr. O'Brien)
A SpanglishSpanglish
.Spanglish refers to the blend of Spanish and English, in the speech of people who speak parts of two languages, or whose normal language is different from that of the country where they live. The Hispanic population of the United States and the British population in Argentina use varieties of...
telenovela
Telenovela
A telenovela is a limited-run serial dramatic programming popular in Latin American, Portuguese, and Spanish television programming. The word combines tele, short for televisión or televisão , and novela, a Spanish or Portuguese word for "novel"...
parody
Parody
A parody , in current usage, is an imitative work created to mock, comment on, or trivialise an original work, its subject, author, style, or some other target, by means of humorous, satiric or ironic imitation...
, which Conan announces that they have made specifically for the NBC-owned
NBC
The National Broadcasting Company is an American commercial broadcasting television network and former radio network headquartered in the GE Building in New York City's Rockefeller Center with additional major offices near Los Angeles and in Chicago...
Telemundo
Telemundo
Telemundo is an American television network that broadcasts in Spanish. The network is the second-largest Spanish-language content producer in the world, and the second-largest Spanish-language network in the United States, behind Univision....
Spanish network. Conando (Conan with a fake mustache) is the hero of the piece, fighting mild villains to save the damsel in distress in most episodes. Each episode features a dramatic entrance, to which the villains bewilderedly ask "¿Conando?", the damsel swoons "¡Conando!" and to which Conan even more wildly replies "¡Si! ¡Conando!" In almost every sketch, Conando defenestrates the villains, making extensive use of stock footage. Quite often the sketch would include ridiculous phrases which you would not often use in daily conversation, but are common in Spanish-learning texts. On occasion, the sketch would include long and complicated speeches which are obviously and extremely voiced-over.
Reintroduced on Tonight June 8, 2009, and performed many times on Tonight, Richter is introduced as Conando's sidekick Nachito, who always shows up when Conando is about to make love
Sexual intercourse
Sexual intercourse, also known as copulation or coitus, commonly refers to the act in which a male's penis enters a female's vagina for the purposes of sexual pleasure or reproduction. The entities may be of opposite sexes, or they may be hermaphroditic, as is the case with snails...
to the damsel, thus spoiling the mood. In one sketch, the damsel did not end up with Conando but rather Mario Lopez
Mario López
Mario Michael Lopez, Jr. is an American actor who has appeared on several television series, in films, and on Broadway. He is best known for his portrayal of the character A.C. Slater on Saved By The Bell, which he also portrayed as a regular on Saved by the Bell: The College Years...
.
The Audiencey Awards
Conan awards members of the studio audience for various talents. Typically this will always include "best celebrity impression" to highlight lookalikes (as in movie casting), and then a variety of other awards which are achieved with props and superimposed images. For example, the winner of "Best Foreign Language Audience Member" was shown with a large superimposed moustache and sombrero, and the "Audience Member Who Smells the Most Like Fresh Salmon" was attacked by a man in a bear costume. Awards show intermission segments (red carpet, how the award is built, etc.) are also parodied.Reintroduced on Tonight June 16, 2009, and later reintroduced again on Conan on June 21, 2011.
In September 2009 the Audiency Awards hit a 'high' when one of the audience members turned out to be one of NORML's Board of Directors and Missouri NORML Executive Director, Dan Viets - who was also nominated for being "..most likely to be the professor at your college who can definitely get you weed."
Movie casting
A fictitious new made-for-TV movie is announced, based on a real-life event Conan has mentioned. Conan then says he has the inside scoop on the movie's casting. Viewers are shown two photos side-by-side of a person or thing who will be portrayed in the movie and the person that will be playing the role. The casting first starts off with people who strikingly resemble the person they are playing but then goes off to extremes with, usually, objects or fictitious characters bearing some resemblance to the person they are playing. The humor is in how similar the two photos are despite how vastly different the two people/things pictured are or vice versa, with Conan often commenting on how great the casting is. Running gags include President George W. BushGeorge W. Bush
George Walker Bush is an American politician who served as the 43rd President of the United States, from 2001 to 2009. Before that, he was the 46th Governor of Texas, having served from 1995 to 2000....
being played by Ralph Wiggum
Ralph Wiggum
Ralph Wiggum is a recurring fictional character on the animated series The Simpsons, voiced by Nancy Cartwright. The son of Police Chief Wiggum and a classmate of Lisa Simpson, Ralph is best known as the show's resident oddball, and is noted for his non sequiturs and erratic behavior...
, Patrick Star
Patrick Star
Patrick Star is the deuteragonist of the Nickelodeon animated comedy series SpongeBob SquarePants, created by creator Stephen Hillenburg and voiced by Bill Fagerbakke. Patrick's most significant character trait is his lack of common sense, which sometimes makes him a negative influence on his best...
, or a deer in the headlights, Joe Biden
Joe Biden
Joseph Robinette "Joe" Biden, Jr. is the 47th and current Vice President of the United States, serving under President Barack Obama...
being played by Bob Barker
Bob Barker
Robert William "Bob" Barker is a former American television game show host. He is best known for hosting CBS's The Price Is Right from 1972 to 2007, making it the longest-running daytime game show in North American television history, and for hosting Truth or Consequences from 1956 to 1975.Born...
, Hillary Clinton being played by Chucky, Condoleezza Rice
Condoleezza Rice
Condoleezza Rice is an American political scientist and diplomat. She served as the 66th United States Secretary of State, and was the second person to hold that office in the administration of President George W. Bush...
being played by Snoop Dogg
Snoop Dogg
Calvin Cordozar Broadus, Jr. , better known by his stage name Snoop Dogg, is an American rapper, record producer, and actor. Snoop is best known as a rapper in the West Coast hip hop scene, and for being one of Dr. Dre's most notable protégés. Snoop Dogg was a Crip gang member while in high school...
, Donald Rumsfeld
Donald Rumsfeld
Donald Henry Rumsfeld is an American politician and businessman. Rumsfeld served as the 13th Secretary of Defense from 1975 to 1977 under President Gerald Ford, and as the 21st Secretary of Defense from 2001 to 2006 under President George W. Bush. He is both the youngest and the oldest person to...
being played by Skeletor
Skeletor
Skeletor is a featured villain in the Masters of the Universe franchise and the arch-enemy and main antagonist of He-Man. Depicted as a muscular blue humanoid with a purple hood over his yellowing bare-bone skull, Skeletor seeks to conquer Castle Grayskull so he can learn its ancient secrets,...
, and Dick Cheney
Dick Cheney
Richard Bruce "Dick" Cheney served as the 46th Vice President of the United States , under George W. Bush....
being played by The Penguin.
Reintroduced on June 17, 2009.
Mike Merritt's Inner Thoughts
As Conan speaks on a recent news story dealing with race, the camera cuts to bassist Mike Merritt, asNew Coins/Stamps
Conan says he has "connections" which allow him to show "New" (fake) state quarters, Euros or commemorative stampCommemorative stamp
A commemorative stamp is a postage stamp, often issued on a significant date such as an anniversary, to honor or commemorate a place, event or person. The subject of the commemorative stamp is usually spelled out in print, unlike definitive stamps which normally depict the subject along with the...
s. The stamps are usually states based on people or current events. The state quarters insult the state they are based on, and the Euros insult the country they are based on. One such Euros skit led to the creation of Conan O'Brien Hates My Homeland.
The new coins sketch was reintroduced on Tonight July 13, 2009.
Photo Gallery
Conan, Max, and announcer Joel GodardJoel Godard
Joel Clinton Godard, Jr. is an American television presenter, best known as the announcer for Late Night with Conan O'Brien during its entire 16-year run from 1993 to 2009.-Early life:...
have recently had a party and Conan displays the ridiculous and fictional events of this party. These events typically include heavy drinking and rather gory violence or homicide on the part of one or the entire cast. Towards the end of the bit they are always joined by a celebrity, played by an actor with a superimposed picture of the celebrity at hand. The celebrity usually ends up getting into a fight with Conan, Joel, or Max, or is seen in compromising positions and/or situations, always looking back at the camera with exactly the same look, since the superimposed picture never changes. Before his death, Carl "Oldie" Olsen, played by William Preston, was usually in the party instead of Joel Godard.
Reintroduced on Tonight July 21, 2009, featuring only Conan and Andy, and their trip to the beach.
Hanging Out with Jordan Schlansky
During the 2007-08 writers' strike, Conan interviewed various members of his production staff including, associate producer Jordan Schlansky. Conan asked Schlansky about his feelings on working for O'Brien, his skill with a bullwhip, his appreciation for the band RushRush (band)
Rush is a Canadian rock band formed in August 1968, in the Willowdale neighbourhood of Toronto, Ontario. The band is composed of bassist, keyboardist, and lead vocalist Geddy Lee, guitarist Alex Lifeson, and drummer and lyricist Neil Peart...
, and his healthy eating habits. During the interview Conan found Schlanksy to be totally unfazed by his bosses jokes or wild antics, reacting to most jokes with a poker face. At the end of the segment, Conan thanked Schlansky, commenting that "I can't believe you're a real person." The positive reaction to the Schlansky interview led to an episode where Jordan and Conan had dinner at an Italian restaurant, with Conan purposefully trying to annoy and embarrass Jordan throughout the bit. Jordan remained unresponsive to Conan's behavior. When O'Brien moved from New York to Los Angeles, most of his staff came with him and found places to live, except for Jordan. Conan and a realtor helped Jordan find a house, with Conan again trying to annoy and embarrass Jordan the whole time. The sketches grew increasingly aggressive over the years with Conan making more pointed criticisms of Schlansky's sophisticated tastes and purported homosexuality.
Conan and Andy on the Aisle
When Richter left Late Night, the sketch was simply titled "Conan on the Aisle." In the skit, Conan and Andy review movies released in cinemas around the time of the sketch's original airing. He usually comments on a negative quality which is either fictitious or exaggerated by an edited scene he then shows as proof. For example, when Conan was reviewing Jurassic Park IIIJurassic Park III
Jurassic Park III is a 2001 American science fiction film and the third of the Jurassic Park franchise. It is the only film in the series that is neither directed by Steven Spielberg nor based on a book by Michael Crichton, though numerous scenes in the movie were taken from Crichton's two books,...
, he mentioned that the movie had scenes that were disgusting and weird. A scene then appeared where a couple
Intimate relationship
An intimate relationship is a particularly close interpersonal relationship that involves physical or emotional intimacy. Physical intimacy is characterized by romantic or passionate love and attachment, or sexual activity. The term is also sometimes used euphemistically for a sexual...
ran and were surprised by a dinosaur
Dinosaur
Dinosaurs are a diverse group of animals of the clade and superorder Dinosauria. They were the dominant terrestrial vertebrates for over 160 million years, from the late Triassic period until the end of the Cretaceous , when the Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event led to the extinction of...
which opened its mouth to roar. Late Night edited the couple's lost child into the dinosaur's mouth, and the child says "hello" to the parents. The sketch occasionally reviewed TV shows. For example, Conan poked fun at the then-new television series Viva Laughlin
Viva Laughlin
Viva Laughlin is an American musical–dramedy series adapted by Bob Lowry and Peter Bowker from the popular BBC British serial, Blackpool. They also served as executive producers alongside Hugh Jackman, John Palermo, Paul Telegdy and Gabriele Muccino. The latter also directed the pilot...
claiming the producers missed some key signals of the show's poor quality. A clip of the show featuring one of its musical numbers appeared interspersed with footage of a "crew member" who, horrified at how terrible the show is, suddenly activates a TNT detonator and the scene switches to stock footage of an imploding building.
Reintroduced on Tonight Aug. 4, 2009.
Brian McCann on the Spot
During the monologue or opening segment, Conan mentions a big news item and says Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)
Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
is on the scene and cuts to him via a remote feed, similar to the Daily Show in that McCann is standing in front of an obvious greenscreen backdrop. McCann then gives an increasingly absurd report that involves a variety of gags, such as the backdrop turning into a slideshow of various landmarks as McCann attempts to convince Conan he's taking a tour, or McCann wearing a pants suit and blond wig in a report about Hillary Clinton. McCann becomes increasingly annoying as the report continues, frustrating Conan, who wanders off his part of the screen and quickly shows up in McCann's screen and knocks him out with a breakaway chair. The camera angle shifts to show the green screen was right next to where Conan was, and McCann pretending to be passed out. Conan then begins to make fun of his acting and wonder if he will lie there for the rest of the bit. Although he usually remains motionless, sometimes this prompts McCann to either smile or, in some cases, sheepishly stand up and leave as Conan continues to make fun of him.
Brian has also done a remote feed of sporting events, such as NBA Finals
NBA Finals
The NBA Finals is the championship series of the National Basketball Association . The series was named the NBA World Championship Series until 1986....
and U.S. Open
U.S. Open (golf)
The United States Open Championship, commonly known as the U.S. Open, is the annual open golf tournament of the United States. It is the second of the four major championships in golf, and is on the official schedule of both the PGA Tour and the European Tour...
, where he had Kevin Garnett
Kevin Garnett
Kevin Maurice Garnett is an American professional basketball player who currently plays power forward for the Boston Celtics of the National Basketball Association . After a high school basketball career at Farragut Career Academy which included winning a national player of the year award, he...
, Doc Rivers
Doc Rivers
Glenn Anton "Doc" Rivers is a former professional basketball player and the current head coach of the NBA's Boston Celtics. Rivers was known for his defense while playing in the NBA...
, and Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods
Eldrick Tont "Tiger" Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time. Formerly the World No...
to interview, though they did not appear on screen. But at the end, the interviewees come out, partially hiding themselves, but only to reveal that it is actually Pierre Bernard. Then Conan would knock out McCann with an object.
When reintroduced on Tonight Aug. 24, 2009, Conan did not hit McCann with a chair. Instead, McCann just walked out of his shot and into Conan's (a running gag in the satellite interview sketch), followed by Bernard, who portrayed the Obama family off screen, and an elderly man playing Brett Favre
Brett Favre
Brett Lorenzo Favre is a former American football quarterback who spent the majority of his career with the Green Bay Packers of the National Football League . He was a 20-year veteran of the NFL, having played quarterback for the Atlanta Falcons , Green Bay Packers , New York Jets and Minnesota...
who appeared earlier in the broadcast.
Pender Sings
Trumpeter Mark PenderMark Pender
Mark "The Loveman" Pender is a trumpet player and vocalist who has played with Southside Johnny, Little Steven and Bruce Springsteen. Since 1993 he has performed on Late Night With Conan O'Brien and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien as a member of The Max Weinberg 7 and The Tonight Show Band...
is invited by Conan to sing a song about a current event. Pender begins normally, but upon reaching the refrain, he loses control, climbing over the railing into the audience, eventually writhing around on the floor wailing "baby" over and over again until Conan finally stops him. The rhythm of the song is typically the same, with different lyrics each time.
Reintroduced on Tonight August 28, 2009, when it was incorporated into the "Conan, Please Blow Up My Car" contest.
The Interrupter
A man in an off-beat magician's costume with a silly voice (played by Brian StackBrian Stack
Brian Stack is an American actor, writer and comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on all three Conan O'Brien late-night talk shows, previously working on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien, and currently on O'Brien's newest show, Conan on TBS.-Early...
) appears in the short hallway to the right of the set, and 'interrupts' Conan. Conan and The Interrupter have a conversation, where every line is started by Conan and finished by The Interrupter (until the very end, where the roles are reversed). The entire conversation focuses upon the Interrupter's seedy and highly unusual private life, involving such details as The Interrupter's parents trying to disown him or something of a sexual nature, such as sneaking into Home Depot after hours to smell bags of 'sexually arousing' peat moss.
Reintroduced on September 3, 2009.
Small Talk Moment
Conan and Max make small talk about a particular subject. The result is usually that both Max and Conan, bantering back and forth, end up going into extreme detail or citing obscure people and events. Once they have exhausted the subject, Max stops and says, "Wow, Conan! Talking about (this subject) sure is interesting", to which Conan enthusiastically responds, "It sure is, Max!" They then stare at one another in dull fashion as the camera cuts back and forth between them.Reintroduced on November 23, 2009 when Max returned from his tour with Bruce Springsteen. The topic of the first return sketch was soccer.
Actual Items
A parody of Jay LenoJay Leno
James Douglas Muir "Jay" Leno is an American stand-up comedian and television host.From 1992 to 2009, Leno was the host of NBC's The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Beginning in September 2009, Leno started a primetime talk show, titled The Jay Leno Show, which aired weeknights at 10:00 p.m. ,...
's Headlines
Headlines (The Tonight Show)
"Headlines" is a segment that airs weekly on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. It also aired on the prime-time spin-off The Jay Leno Show. The segment usually airs on Monday, though it airs on Tuesday usually after some popular weekend event pre-empted it for Monday night...
segment on The Tonight Show
The Tonight Show
The Tonight Show is an American late-night talk show that has aired on NBC since 1954. It is the longest currently running regularly scheduled entertainment program in the United States, and the third longest-running show on NBC, after Meet the Press and Today.The Tonight Show has been hosted by...
in which Leno finds humorous mistakes in various newspapers. Conan's bit takes regular newspaper ads and stories and adds blatantly fake text; for example, an ad depicting a leather living room couch was modified to include a cartoon cow exclaiming, "How's my ass feel, you son of a bitch?", or an ad for a new home, labeling one of the rooms as "The Room You Will Die In." Adding to the humor, Conan repeatedly insists that his ads are real, commenting "you can't make this stuff up, why would you, that would waste everybody's time." This sketch appeared on the show's very first episode in September 1993.
"ASS" Stamp
Conan and Max converse about a current event or person, with Conan asking leading questions to which Max replies incorrectly, but in great detail in an attempt to appear knowledgeable. Usually, this is initiated when Conan introduces a person who is famous for some accomplishment but not necessarily widely recognizable. Max will claim to recognize the person and perhaps claim to be a long-time friend or acquaintance of the individual. Conan then catches Max in the lie, stating "I made it up just to make a fool out of you!". Max replies "Well, I guess I know what's coming...", Conan says "You sure do", and a large red stamp (like a typical rubber stamp imprint) of the word "ASS" appears on the screen over a dejected Max, along with a dramatic voiceover of the word. Occasionally, the roles will be reversed, and Conan will be "stamped".Other stamps are often used to abruptly punctuate various one-off sketches, including words such as "Alone", "Liar", "Sad", and "Small Penis". Another sketch on Tonight ended with an "Admirable" stamp after Barack Obama
Barack Obama
Barack Hussein Obama II is the 44th and current President of the United States. He is the first African American to hold the office. Obama previously served as a United States Senator from Illinois, from January 2005 until he resigned following his victory in the 2008 presidential election.Born in...
called the work of AFTRA members "admirable" in a video. Otherwise, these sketches bear no particular resemblance to the standard recurring "Ass Stamp" sketch.
A variation of the ass stamp appeared on Conan's new show on TBS in 2011 during the NFL playoffs where Conan and Andy are trying to feign an interest in the NFL playoffs and afterward, a stamp appears over the two of them calling them "GIRLS". This happened again during the Stanley Cup Playoffs when Conan said he was cheering for the Boston Bruins, since Conan is from Boston. Andy then called him out on it, saying he's never heard about him talk about hockey before. Andy then quizzed him on who the coach was, name a forward, the goalie, etc., and then asked who the Assistant Equipment Manager was, and then ridiculous ones like Vice-President of Corporate Partnerships. Eventually, Conan got one wrong and Conan was stamped as a "PHONY A-HOLE".
Before Plastic Surgery
A picture of a famous celebrity, usually either rumored to have had or has actually had plastic surgery done in real life, is shown. The picture is then distorted with exaggerated features into a grotesque new picture of what that person looked like before the surgery. The last item in the sketch often makes a joke using an unaltered photograph of another unrelated celebrity, animal, plant or object as the before picture: for example, if George W. Bush had plastic surgery, his before picture would be that of a chimpanzee. The sketch is loosely related to the "If They Mated" sketch in that it uses the same technology for a similar comedic premise.Celebrity Secrets
Features celebrities in a room that looks like a jail cell or perhaps a police interrogation room, smoking a cigarette and downing hard liquor, usually telling some humorous "secret" previously unknown about them. For example, one featured Michael CaineMichael Caine
Sir Michael Caine, CBE is an English actor. He won Academy Awards for best supporting actor in both Hannah and Her Sisters and The Cider House Rules ....
saying "I was convinced that the 'MC' in MC Hammer
MC Hammer
Stanley Kirk Burrell , better known by his stage name MC Hammer , is an American rapper, entertainer, business entrepreneur, dancer and actor. He had his greatest commercial success and popularity from the late 1980s until the mid-1990s...
's name stood for Michael Caine. When I found out it didn't, I destroyed his career." Another featured Alex Trebek
Alex Trebek
George Alexander "Alex" Trebek is a Canadian American game show host who has been the host of the game show Jeopardy! since 1984, and prior to that, he hosted game shows such as Pitfall and High Rollers. He has appeared in numerous television series, usually as himself...
taking a drink, and admitting he had a "potent potables" problem. When Gwyneth Paltrow
Gwyneth Paltrow
Gwyneth Kate Paltrow is an American actress and singer. She made her acting debut on stage in 1990 and started appearing in films in 1991. After appearing in several films throughout the decade, Paltrow gained early notice for her work in films such as Se7en and Emma...
appeared on the sketch she admitted that anytime before she starts a new film she kills a hobo with a hammer, as well as admitting an affinity for porn. When U2
U2
U2 are an Irish rock band from Dublin. Formed in 1976, the group consists of Bono , The Edge , Adam Clayton , and Larry Mullen, Jr. . U2's early sound was rooted in post-punk but eventually grew to incorporate influences from many genres of popular music...
appeared on the sketch, they admitted they were not Irish
Irish people
The Irish people are an ethnic group who originate in Ireland, an island in northwestern Europe. Ireland has been populated for around 9,000 years , with the Irish people's earliest ancestors recorded having legends of being descended from groups such as the Nemedians, Fomorians, Fir Bolg, Tuatha...
. When Senator John McCain
John McCain
John Sidney McCain III is the senior United States Senator from Arizona. He was the Republican nominee for president in the 2008 United States election....
ran for president in 2008
United States presidential election, 2008
The United States presidential election of 2008 was the 56th quadrennial presidential election. It was held on November 4, 2008. Democrat Barack Obama, then the junior United States Senator from Illinois, defeated Republican John McCain, the senior U.S. Senator from Arizona. Obama received 365...
, Conan began replaying his secrets segments, which included McCain plugging "The McCain-Feingold Singles Guide to Portland."
Conan O'Brien Hates My Homeland
The premise of this skit had its origin when Late Night received many angry letters from viewers in UkraineUkraine
Ukraine is a country in Eastern Europe. It has an area of 603,628 km², making it the second largest contiguous country on the European continent, after Russia...
after mocking that nation in another recurring skit, New Euros, where the joke was an image on a Ukrainian Euro Coin depicting a man in Eastern European dress with four arms, holding up seventeen fingers, with the caption on the coin saying "Over 17 years since the Chernobyl Accident". O'Brien was unaware that his show was even airing in Ukraine. So the premise of "Conan O'Brien Hates My Homeland" is that O'Brien, in an effort to find out where else the show is being aired without his knowledge, reads fast-paced insults of each of the nation
Nation
A nation may refer to a community of people who share a common language, culture, ethnicity, descent, and/or history. In this definition, a nation has no physical borders. However, it can also refer to people who share a common territory and government irrespective of their ethnic make-up...
s of the world in alphabetical order http://conan.kary.ca/, with the expectation that angry mail will come pouring in from offended viewers in countries where the show is broadcast. O'Brien insults 5 countries (with a bell ringing between each one) each time the bit airs. A sample insult: Georgia
Georgia (country)
Georgia is a sovereign state in the Caucasus region of Eurasia. Located at the crossroads of Western Asia and Eastern Europe, it is bounded to the west by the Black Sea, to the north by Russia, to the southwest by Turkey, to the south by Armenia, and to the southeast by Azerbaijan. The capital of...
: Where Europe meets Asia and says "Hey, why don't we both dump our crap here?" Announcer Joel Godard then tells insulted viewers around the world a real address to send their angry letters. On August 9, 2007, Zimbabwe
Zimbabwe
Zimbabwe is a landlocked country located in the southern part of the African continent, between the Zambezi and Limpopo rivers. It is bordered by South Africa to the south, Botswana to the southwest, Zambia and a tip of Namibia to the northwest and Mozambique to the east. Zimbabwe has three...
was the last country to be featured, thus ending the sketch after three years.
Finland
An announcer on the Finnish entertainment channel SubTV, which airs the show a couple of days after it is aired in the USA, asked people to defend Finland before Conan got to insult it, and the viewers in Finland began sending mail before the bit had even gotten to the letter F. Conan responded by assuming the Finnish "just couldn't wait" to be insulted and officially insulted Finland in the segment. An overwhelming number of postcardPostcard
A postcard or post card is a rectangular piece of thick paper or thin cardboard intended for writing and mailing without an envelope....
s were supposedly received, which apparently "forced" Conan to give Finland a formal apology. Conan then went as far as to have the flag of Finland
Flag of Finland
The flag of Finland , also called Siniristilippu , dates from the beginning of the 20th century. On a white background, it features a blue Nordic cross, which represents Christianity. The state flag has a coat of arms in the centre, but is otherwise identical to the civil flag. The swallow-tailed...
shown in the background during a speech and slandered the Finns' "hated" neighbor Sweden with a sign saying "Sweden Sucks!" printed over the flag of Sweden
Flag of Sweden
The flag of Sweden is a Scandinavian cross that extends to the edges of the flag. This Scandinavian cross represents Christianity. The design and colours of the Swedish flag are believed to have been inspired by the present Coat of arms of Sweden of 1442, which is blue divided quarterly by a cross...
. In 2006, the Finland antics increased. While talking to fans before the show, Conan met two Finnish fans who commented that he resembled their President, a woman named Tarja Halonen
Tarja Halonen
Tarja Kaarina Halonen is the incumbent President of Finland. The first female to hold the office, Halonen had previously been a member of the parliament from 1979 to 2000 when she resigned after her election to the presidency...
. Amused that his show was even airing in Finland, Conan made frequent references to his resemblance to Halonen, even putting her picture beside a live feed of his head. Upon learning that Halonen was running for reelection, Conan went so far as to film a segment of the show which took the form of a campaign commercial for the President. When Halonen won she jokingly gave O'Brien part of the credit and offered to meet him if he ever came to Finland. This inspired an episode where Conan did travel to Finland where he was given a hero's welcome at the airport, met with Tarja Halonen, participated in Lapplander folk rituals, and sought out an ordinary Finnish fan who had written a letter to the show.
Desk Driving
Originally done with sidekick Andy, Conan later invited an audience member to ride his desk outside with him. He actually was in front of a green screen and he holds a steering wheel. The greenscreen displays scenes of the road and the outdoors. Usually they get into humorous situations on the road. For example, as they went through a rural area, animals "humped" or attempted to mate with him. Green-colored objects are also used to incorporate violence into the bit, such as by putting green circles onto their bodies to show that they have been shot. A recurring incident since the use of audience members involves driving down the stairs outside the 30 Rockefeller Plaza building (which would be a bumpy ride on a wheeled conveyance), then Conan pausing the bit to criticize his passenger's insufficient bouncing and rewinding the footage to the top of the stairs to re-try.Fantastic!
This sketch sometimes occurs when Conan announces future guests. After announcing the first guest, a member of the audience (played by writer Brian Stack) is seen saying that the guest is "Fantastic!" right to the camera with a thumbs up. After Conan announces the next guest, the member does almost the same thing, but ends by making up a word by combining a guest's name or work with the word "fantastic". (For example: "Wow, Omar EppsOmar Epps
Omar Hashim Epps is an American actor, singer, songwriter, and record producer. His film roles include Major League II, Juice, Higher Learning, Scream 2, The Wood, In Too Deep, and Love and Basketball. Epps' television work includes the role of Dr. Dennis Gant on the US medical drama series ER,...
? That charismatic scene-stealer is Epps-tastic!" or "Tell that group, "don't stop the 'tastic!") Then, Conan reminds viewers he will also be doing his usual "hilarious monologue", the camera shows that the man prepares to do his bit, but changes his mind. Conan also mentions the show's "zany, off-the-wall comedy bits", and the man either already stopped paying attention and/or begun torturing himself. (Examples: reading a disturbing or uninteresting book or newspaper article, drinking bleach or drilling his teeth.) Conan then questions the man, asking if he just likes the guests but "thinks everything else we do is crap?" or some other negative word. The man will then finish with "not crap, craptastic!"
Guests We'll Never Have Back
Conan will start by talking about how great the guests for that night's show are, then mention that sometimes they book guests whose appearances end up being disastrous. He then introduces a series of fictional clips from past shows where the guests reveal themselves to have unforeseen quirks or cause disturbing mishaps. Some examples include a chef who does not actually make anything, but only reassembles food to its original form, and a character named Barney Brittlebones who crumples to the floor the instant he makes physical contact with Conan.Horny Manatee
During the airing of the usual "New College Mascots" sketch, a character called the "FSUFlorida State University
The Florida State University is a space-grant and sea-grant public university located in Tallahassee, Florida, United States. It is a comprehensive doctoral research university with medical programs and significant research activity as determined by the Carnegie Foundation...
Webcam
Webcam
A webcam is a video camera that feeds its images in real time to a computer or computer network, often via USB, ethernet, or Wi-Fi.Their most popular use is the establishment of video links, permitting computers to act as videophones or videoconference stations. This common use as a video camera...
Manatee
Manatee
Manatees are large, fully aquatic, mostly herbivorous marine mammals sometimes known as sea cows...
" was featured - a manatee in front of a computer, dancing to the Divinyls
Divinyls
Divinyls were an Australian rock band formed in Sydney in 1980 and featuring vocalist Christina Amphlett and guitarist Mark McEntee. As the focal point, Amphlett performed on stage wearing a school uniform and fishnet stockings, often using an illuminated neon tube as a prop and displaying...
' "I Touch Myself
I Touch Myself
"I Touch Myself" is a 1990 single by the Australian rock band Divinyls. The song was written by Divinyls bandmembers Christina Amphlett and Mark McEntee and professional songwriters Tom Kelly and Billy Steinberg for the band's self-titled album...
", being watched remotely by trumpeter Mark Pender
Mark Pender
Mark "The Loveman" Pender is a trumpet player and vocalist who has played with Southside Johnny, Little Steven and Bruce Springsteen. Since 1993 he has performed on Late Night With Conan O'Brien and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien as a member of The Max Weinberg 7 and The Tonight Show Band...
. Conan, in an ad-libbed statement, mentioned that the character appeared on the, at the time fictitious, web site "HornyManatee.com". The next night, Conan told viewers that if he mentions a web site which does not exist the NBC corporate policy is to buy the domain name lest someone else use it and potentially make NBC liable for the site's content. Conan said Late Night decided to use the domain name to create an actual web site, giving it the appearance of a fake porn site. With http://www.HornyManatee.com (no longer operational), Conan asked viewers to submit pictures to the page. Since that night, Conan has periodically given viewers an "update" on the website's status, mentioning its hit count and several fan submitted images, poems, and other media pouring in. Conan also used the updates as lead ins for special, on-stage Horny Manatee segments. For example, Conan called on James Lipton
James Lipton
James Lipton is an American writer, poet, composer, actor and dean emeritus of the Actors Studio Drama School at Pace University in New York City. He is the executive producer, writer and host of the Bravo cable television series Inside the Actors Studio, which debuted in 1994...
to dramatically recite the fan-made poetry, then dance with the Manatee on air at his own request, and flew the Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Pittsburgh is the second-largest city in the US Commonwealth of Pennsylvania and the county seat of Allegheny County. Regionally, it anchors the largest urban area of Appalachia and the Ohio River Valley, and nationally, it is the 22nd-largest urban area in the United States...
-based pop-punk duo Rocket Me Nowhere to New York to perform their tribute song "My Hopeless Manatee".
The last time Conan stated site's hit count (Jan. 18, 2007), it was "20 million hits" and counting. In an interview with New York Times, O'Brien has also said that he was overwhelmed at the viewer response.
As of December 16, 2006, the site has achieved an Alexa
Alexa Internet
Alexa Internet, Inc. is a California-based subsidiary company of Amazon.com that is known for its toolbar and Web site. Once installed, the toolbar collects data on browsing behavior which is transmitted to the Web site where it is stored and analyzed and is the basis for the company's Web traffic...
website ranking of about 31,000,000,
over thirty times the rank for SaveTheManatee.org (about 937,000),
to which Late Night is donating some proceeds of its "Horny Manatee" T-shirts offered on the site.
Currently, traffic to the website is routed to NBC's main site.
If They Mated
Pictures of two famous celebrities, usually believed to be dating at the time, are shown. The pictures are then combined into a grotesque new picture of what their offspring would look like if they mated. The segment became so successful that it later spawned a book. The last item in the sketch often makes a joke using an unaltered photograph of a celebrity as the offspring: for example, if Saddam HusseinSaddam Hussein
Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti was the fifth President of Iraq, serving in this capacity from 16 July 1979 until 9 April 2003...
and Osama Bin Laden
Osama bin Laden
Osama bin Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden was the founder of the militant Islamist organization Al-Qaeda, the jihadist organization responsible for the September 11 attacks on the United States and numerous other mass-casualty attacks against civilian and military targets...
("two of the most hated people in the world") were to have a child, it would be Steve Bartman
Steve Bartman
The Steve Bartman incident occurred during a Major League Baseball playoff game between the Chicago Cubs and the Florida Marlins on October 14, 2003, at Wrigley Field in Chicago....
. Another notable example; Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
Paris Whitney Hilton is an American businesswoman, heiress, and socialite. She is a great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton . Hilton is known for her controversial participation in a sex tape in 2003, and appearance on the television series The Simple Life alongside fellow socialite and childhood...
and her pet chihuahua would create George W. Bush
George W. Bush
George Walker Bush is an American politician who served as the 43rd President of the United States, from 2001 to 2009. Before that, he was the 46th Governor of Texas, having served from 1995 to 2000....
.
Joe's
Conan begins by talking about needing to relax and unwind by going to his favorite bar - Joe's. Theme music plays with an exterior shot of the bar. He walks inside and the bartender (Kevin Dorff) and a patron (Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)
Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
) begin to berate Conan invariably for showing up to an event 'completely plastered' insisting on feminine activities and in some way or another ruining food or drink that's to be served. Conan drinks hard liquor while being yelled at and looking insecure. The sketch always ends with the bartender, Joe, demanding Conan pay the money he owes. Conan stands up, screams, "I'LL PAY WHEN I'M GOOD AND READY!", and hurls his drink against the wall, often returning to break a stool over the bartender and patron
Masturbating Bear
The Masturbating Bear was a recurring character on Late Night. The character consisted of a man in a bear costume dressed in a diaper-like undergarments which contained oversized genitalia, and was often accompanied by several human "handlers" armed with cattle prods. The character would be asked to perform some sort of innocuous task such as explaining a chart on recent economic fluctuations or smoking weed with Conan O'Brien. Inevitably, a few seconds into whatever task he had come to perform, the bear would begin furiously fondling himself as part of the song Sabre DanceSabre Dance
"The Sabre Dance" is a movement in the final act of the ballet Gayane , written by Armenian composer Aram Khachaturian's and completed in 1942. It evokes a whirling war dance in an Armenian dance, where the dancers display their skill with sabres. Its middle section incorporates an Armenian folk...
plays. The bear would then usually be given electric shocks by his human handlers. Despite repeated instances of masturbation, the Masturbating Bear would continue to be invited back on Late Night. Once, the bear was revealed to be Chuck Norris in costume.
During the last week of Conan's run on Late Night, Conan declared the bear was too risque for 11:30 and tried to retire the bear by encasing him in carbonite, a la Han Solo
Han Solo
Han Solo is a fictional character in the Star Wars franchise played by Harrison Ford. Introduced in the film Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope , Solo and his Wookiee co-pilot, Chewbacca , become involved in the Rebel Alliance against the Galactic Empire...
. This drew a protest from Carrie Fisher
Carrie Fisher
Carrie Frances Fisher is an American actress, novelist, screenwriter, and lecturer. She is most famous for her portrayal of Princess Leia in the original Star Wars trilogy, her bestselling novel Postcards from the Edge, for which she wrote the screenplay to the film of the same name, and her...
, who subsequently freed the bear. The bear was last seen sailing away on a boat with Fisher until he reappeared on The Tonight Show on January 20, 2010 in the wake of the controversy surrounding Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien, which saw O'Brien's departure. Originally, it was thought NBC would be able to claim the Masturbating Bear as intellectual property
Intellectual property
Intellectual property is a term referring to a number of distinct types of creations of the mind for which a set of exclusive rights are recognized—and the corresponding fields of law...
. As a result, he was transformed into the Self-Pleasuring Panda for O'Brien's tour.
When O'Brien took his TBS show to New York City for a week in 2011, the bear was, in one episode, depicted as being out of show business and settling down with a wife and two children in the New York suburbs. After a brief video reel revealed such, the bear was invited on stage to a cheering audience. However, Conan's words about the size of the audience became too much for the bear, who stripped out of his business attire and began to pleasure himself both on stage and on hanging rafters above.
New Characters
Conan tells the audience that it is time for new additions to be added to Late Night's current characters, such as "The Masturbating Bear" or the FedExFedEx
FedEx Corporation , originally known as FDX Corporation, is a logistics services company, based in the United States with headquarters in Memphis, Tennessee...
Pope (Brian McCann). New additions are often more ridiculous than ones before, such as the Nudist Who Has No Skeleton or the Screeching Raccoon with a Jet Pack. Some are popular enough to warrant a second appearance, though few are actually made into recurring characters. Generally the new characters are absurdist in nature and carry names which fully describe their appearance or concept, sometimes extending to full multi phrase sentences. For example, one recurring character was "Gorilla Nurse Using an Old Fashioned Abdominal Exerciser While Listening to 'Angel of the Morning' by Juice Newton" a character which consisted simply of a stuffer gorilla in a nurses costume being vibrated by an old abdominal exerciser while the titular music played. A related gag also exists where Conan promises that he will not waste the audience's time with zany, random jokes, only to introduce a completely zany, random character. Notable characters from this bit include Fidel Castro
Fidel Castro
Fidel Alejandro Castro Ruz is a Cuban revolutionary and politician, having held the position of Prime Minister of Cuba from 1959 to 1976, and then President from 1976 to 2008. He also served as the First Secretary of the Communist Party of Cuba from the party's foundation in 1961 until 2011...
Rabbit DJ
Disc jockey
A disc jockey, also known as DJ, is a person who selects and plays recorded music for an audience. Originally, "disc" referred to phonograph records, not the later Compact Discs. Today, the term includes all forms of music playback, no matter the medium.There are several types of disc jockeys...
, Nation of Twain
Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens , better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American author and humorist...
, Man protected from three-inch bees, Hippie fire hydrant on a skateboard
Skateboard
A skateboard is typically a specially designed plywood board combined with a polyurethane coating used for making smoother slides and stronger durability, used primarily for the activity of skateboarding. The first skateboards to reach public notice came out of the surfing craze of the early 1960s,...
, Cactus
Cactus
A cactus is a member of the plant family Cactaceae. Their distinctive appearance is a result of adaptations to conserve water in dry and/or hot environments. In most species, the stem has evolved to become photosynthetic and succulent, while the leaves have evolved into spines...
Chef Playing "We Didn't Start the Fire
We Didn't Start the Fire
"We Didn't Start the Fire" is a song by Billy Joel. Its lyrics are made up from rapid-fire brief allusions to over a hundred headline events between March 1949 and 1989, when the song was released on his album Storm Front...
" on the Flute and the Oscillating Air Purifier that Looks Like Slash
Slash (musician)
Saul Hudson , known by his stage name Slash, is a British-American musician and songwriter. He is best known as the former lead guitarist of the American hard rock band Guns N' Roses, with whom he achieved worldwide success in the late 1980s and early 1990s. During his later years with Guns N'...
, and R2
R2-D2
R2-D2 , is a character in the Star Wars universe. An astromech droid, R2-D2 is a major character throughout all six Star Wars films. Along with his droid companion C-3PO, he joins or supports Anakin Skywalker, Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, and Obi-Wan Kenobi in various points in the saga...
–Mr. T
Mr. T
Mr. T is an American actor known for his roles as B. A. Baracus in the 1980s television series The A-Team, as boxer Clubber Lang in the 1982 film Rocky III, and for his appearances as a professional wrestler. Mr. T is known for his trademark African Mandinka warrior hairstyle, his gold jewelry,...
2. Another version is "New College Mascots", which feature fake mascots which often make fun of a real college or its surrounding area. One such skit featured an "FSU Webcam Manatee" which spawned the "Horny Manatee" sketch of December 2006. In the lead-up to his departure for the Tonight Show in early 2009, O'Brien brought back characters which would be inappropriate in the 11:30 PM time slot, such as the Masturbating Bear, which was frozen in carbonite, but subsequently rescued by Carrie Fisher
Carrie Fisher
Carrie Frances Fisher is an American actress, novelist, screenwriter, and lecturer. She is most famous for her portrayal of Princess Leia in the original Star Wars trilogy, her bestselling novel Postcards from the Edge, for which she wrote the screenplay to the film of the same name, and her...
. The New York Daily News
New York Daily News
The Daily News of New York City is the fourth most widely circulated daily newspaper in the United States with a daily circulation of 605,677, as of November 1, 2011....
reported on May 27, 2009 that O'Brien eventually plans to reintroduce the Masturbating Bear on Tonight.
Pierre Bernard's Recliner of Rage
A comedy bit in which Late Night graphic designer Pierre Bernard, Jr. sits in a recliner and relates a story that has recently angered him personally. This tale is always a long, drawn-out personal tale delivered in a soft-spoken tone that usually involves some sort of comic-book, animeAnime
is the Japanese abbreviated pronunciation of "animation". The definition sometimes changes depending on the context. In English-speaking countries, the term most commonly refers to Japanese animated cartoons....
, sci-fi-related, or similarly esoteric medium. At the end of his complaint he states "Bottom line, America..." as he grabs the handle of the recliner and shifts it back into an upright position to lean forward and point furiously at another camera centered on him to give his final geeky demands on the matter. Much of the humor of the sketch comes from the dry, emotionless manner in which Bernard delivers his "rage." A complaint about the TV show Stargate SG-1
Stargate SG-1
Stargate SG-1 is a Canadian-American adventure and military science fiction television series and part of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer's Stargate franchise. The show, created by Brad Wright and Jonathan Glassner, is based on the 1994 feature film Stargate by Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich...
led to him getting small cameos on the show; whereas a complaint about the Japanese anime franchise Robotech
Robotech
Robotech is an 85-episode science fiction anime adaptation produced by Harmony Gold USA in association with Tatsunoko Production Co., Ltd. and first released in the United States in 1985...
numerous DVD releases in the marketplace prompted a "response" from robotech.com about the complaint and an offer to send Bernard a free complete collection of the DVDs.
In 2007, Bernard and O'Brien starred in a spin off sketch entitled "Pierre Bernard: Serial Killer." The sketch had been inspired by Bernard's real life refusal to allow the show to tape a remote segment at his home focusing on his sizable action figure collection. Conan insisted that the only explanation for Bernard's reluctance to allow a camera crew into his home was that the graphic designer was, in fact, a serial killer. During the sketch, O'Brien interviewed Bernard in the manner of news magazine shows such as Dateline NBC
Dateline NBC
Dateline NBC, or Dateline, is a U.S. weekly television newsmagazine broadcast by NBC. It previously was NBC's flagship news magazine, but now focuses on true crime stories. It airs Friday at 9 p.m. EST and after football season on Sunday at 7 p.m. EST.-History:Dateline is historically notable for...
, asking questions designed to implicate Bernard as a murderer. Initially, Bernard seemed reluctant but as the sketch went on he seemed to get more into the act. At one point, Bernard admitted that he did not describe himself as prolific because "I haven't been killing for very long." After the taped portion of the sketch, Bernard was wheeled on stage on a gurney wearing a muzzle similar to Hannibal Lecter
Hannibal Lecter
Hannibal Lecter M.D. is a fictional character in a series of horror novels by Thomas Harris and in the films adapted from them.Lecter was introduced in the 1981 thriller novel Red Dragon as a brilliant psychiatrist and cannibalistic serial killer...
in The Silence of the Lambs.
Pierre Bernard moved with O'Brien on The Tonight Show to continue as a graphic designer and occasional performer, first seen on June 3, 2009.
Puppets
Late Night has made extensive use of puppets since the show's inception. For example, in one sketch, called Puppet's Last Words Channel, a puppet scientist prepares to take a drink from a cup labeled "acid" and says, "I sure do love my morning cup of coffee." The acid melts the puppet's face. In another segment of the same sketch, a puppet exclaims to another puppet that she was born with both sets of genitalia. One well-known gag features "Vomiting KermitKermit the Frog
Kermit the Frog is puppeteer Jim Henson's most famous Muppet creation, first introduced in 1955. He is the protagonist of many Muppet projects, most notably as the host of The Muppet Show, and has appeared in various sketches on Sesame Street, in commercials and in public service announcements over...
", showcasing the Muppet retching streams of liquid from its mouth. Perhaps the most famous puppet, both on and off the show, is Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. On June 19, 2009, Triumph crossed over onto The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien
The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien is an American late-night talk show that featured Conan O'Brien as host from June 1, 2009 to January 22, 2010 as part of NBC's long-running Tonight Show franchise...
.
SAT Analogies
Conan helps students with their standardized exams by providing satirized SATSAT
The SAT Reasoning Test is a standardized test for college admissions in the United States. The SAT is owned, published, and developed by the College Board, a nonprofit organization in the United States. It was formerly developed, published, and scored by the Educational Testing Service which still...
analogies
Analogy
Analogy is a cognitive process of transferring information or meaning from a particular subject to another particular subject , and a linguistic expression corresponding to such a process...
based on current events. Although the newest SAT format has dropped analogies, the segment continues to be used in new episodes. A typical example: person who sees a pregnant woman : "you're glowing" :: person who sees a pregnant Nicole Ritchie : "who stuffed an avocado in that cocktail straw?" The sketch often ends with an analogy involving Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
Paris Whitney Hilton is an American businesswoman, heiress, and socialite. She is a great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton . Hilton is known for her controversial participation in a sex tape in 2003, and appearance on the television series The Simple Life alongside fellow socialite and childhood...
that falsely seems to be making a joke about her sexual history, for example: Final episode of "The Sopranos": lots of guys getting whacked resulting in messy loss of bodily fluids:: Paris Hilton: popular hotel heiress
Syncro-Vox
This sketch relies heavily on the low-budget filming method Syncro-VoxSyncro-Vox
Syncro-Vox is a filming method which combines static images with moving images, the most common use of which is to superimpose talking lips on a photograph of a celebrity or a cartoon drawing. It is one of the most extreme examples of the cost-cutting strategy of limited animation...
. A TV screen is lowered down to the seat where the interviewed would actually sit. On the screen is a still image of a celebrity, with live video of the mouth of the back stage impersonator superimposed—because of this method, the fake interviews are also called the "Clutch Cargo
Clutch Cargo
Clutch Cargo is an animated television series produced by Cambria Productions and syndicated beginning on March 9, 1959. Notable for its very limited animation, yet imaginative stories, the series was a surprise hit at the time, and could be seen on 65 stations nationwide in 1960.- Plot :The...
routine", after the 1959 cartoon, that is the most widely remembered user of Syncro-Vox
Syncro-Vox
Syncro-Vox is a filming method which combines static images with moving images, the most common use of which is to superimpose talking lips on a photograph of a celebrity or a cartoon drawing. It is one of the most extreme examples of the cost-cutting strategy of limited animation...
. Commonly impersonated celebrities are Arnold Schwarzenegger
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Arnold Alois Schwarzenegger is an Austrian-American former professional bodybuilder, actor, businessman, investor, and politician. Schwarzenegger served as the 38th Governor of California from 2003 until 2011....
(who almost always mentions his 'smash hit holiday classic', Jingle All the Way
Jingle All the Way
Jingle All the Way is a 1996 American family comedy film directed by Brian Levant and starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sinbad, Phil Hartman, Rita Wilson, Jake Lloyd, James Belushi and Robert Conrad...
, and makes lame comebacks such as "You're not even a movie!"), George W. Bush
George W. Bush
George Walker Bush is an American politician who served as the 43rd President of the United States, from 2001 to 2009. Before that, he was the 46th Governor of Texas, having served from 1995 to 2000....
, Barbara Bush
Barbara Bush
Barbara Pierce Bush is the wife of the 41st President of the United States George H. W. Bush, and served as First Lady of the United States from 1989 to 1993. She is the mother of the 43rd President George W. Bush and of the 43rd Governor of Florida Jeb Bush...
(who is given the gruff voice of a man from New Jersey), Bill Clinton
Bill Clinton
William Jefferson "Bill" Clinton is an American politician who served as the 42nd President of the United States from 1993 to 2001. Inaugurated at age 46, he was the third-youngest president. He took office at the end of the Cold War, and was the first president of the baby boomer generation...
, Hillary Clinton and Martha Stewart
Martha Stewart
Martha Stewart is an American business magnate, author, magazine publisher, and television personality. As founder of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia, she has gained success through a variety of business ventures, encompassing publishing, broadcasting, and merchandising...
(either of whom if, nagged by Conan about a point she wishes to dismiss, will begin talking in a demonically deeper voice as her eyes glow red
Devil
The Devil is believed in many religions and cultures to be a powerful, supernatural entity that is the personification of evil and the enemy of God and humankind. The nature of the role varies greatly...
), Michael Jackson
Michael Jackson
Michael Joseph Jackson was an American recording artist, entertainer, and businessman. Referred to as the King of Pop, or by his initials MJ, Jackson is recognized as the most successful entertainer of all time by Guinness World Records...
, Sammy Sosa
Sammy Sosa
Samuel Peralta "Sammy" Sosa is a Dominican former professional baseball right fielder. Sosa played with four Major League Baseball teams over his career which spanned from 1989-2007....
, Barry Bonds
Barry Bonds
Barry Lamar Bonds is an American former Major League Baseball outfielder. Bonds played from 1986 to 2007, for the Pittsburgh Pirates and San Francisco Giants. He is the son of former major league All-Star Bobby Bonds...
, Rafael Palmeiro
Rafael Palmeiro
Rafael Palmeiro Corrales is a former Major League Baseball first baseman and left fielder. Palmeiro was an All-American at Mississippi State University before being drafted by the Chicago Cubs in 1985...
, Donald Trump
Donald Trump
Donald John Trump, Sr. is an American business magnate, television personality and author. He is the chairman and president of The Trump Organization and the founder of Trump Entertainment Resorts. Trump's extravagant lifestyle, outspoken manner and role on the NBC reality show The Apprentice have...
, Saddam Hussein
Saddam Hussein
Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti was the fifth President of Iraq, serving in this capacity from 16 July 1979 until 9 April 2003...
, Tom Cruise
Tom Cruise
Thomas Cruise Mapother IV , better known as Tom Cruise, is an American film actor and producer. He has been nominated for three Academy Awards and he has won three Golden Globe Awards....
(who often shouts triumphantly and raises his fists or feet, in reference to his infamous "Couch Jumping Incident" on Oprah), Mike Tyson
Mike Tyson
Michael Gerard "Mike" Tyson is a retired American boxer. Tyson is a former undisputed heavyweight champion of the world and holds the record as the youngest boxer to win the WBC, WBA and IBF world heavyweight titles, he was 20 years, 4 months and 22 days old...
, and Keith Richards
Keith Richards
Keith Richards is an English musician, songwriter, and founding member of the Rolling Stones. Rolling Stone magazine said Richards had created "rock's greatest single body of riffs", and placed him as the "10th greatest guitarist of all time." Fourteen songs written by Richards and songwriting...
. Most of the impressions are done by either Robert Smigel
Robert Smigel
Robert Smigel is an American actor, humorist, comedian and writer known for his Saturday Night Live "TV Funhouse" cartoon shorts and as the puppeteer and voice behind Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog.-Early life:...
or Brian Stack
Brian Stack
Brian Stack is an American actor, writer and comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on all three Conan O'Brien late-night talk shows, previously working on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien, and currently on O'Brien's newest show, Conan on TBS.-Early...
.
This bit was parodied, along with the entire show, on Robot Chicken
Robot Chicken
Robot Chicken is an American stop motion animated television series created and executive produced by Seth Green and Matthew Senreich along with co-head writers Douglas Goldstein and Tom Root. Green provides many voices for the show...
's Star Wars Special. Conan provided his own voice.
Quackers
Quackers is a white domesticated duckDomesticated duck
Domesticated ducks are ducks that are raised for meat, eggs and down. Many ducks are also kept for show, as pets or for their ornamental value...
who first appeared on the August 6, 2007 show during a sketch. The sketch involved Conan nervously reacting to various band members shouting at him, only to learn they were being literal. For example, one band member shouted, "Conan, Duck!" and Conan dove for cover behind his desk, only to learn the band member was pointing out a duck was in the studio. Conan, noting the audience's apparently positive reaction to the duck, dubbed it Quackers. Two nights later, Quackers made a return appearance, during which the duck unexpectedly defecated on the studio floor and then rubbed its own beak in it as if eating, simultaneously prompting riotous laughter/howling from the audience and a horrified response from Conan, who referred to him as "Quackers the Shit-Eating Duck". The August 10 and September 4 shows included a "special announcement" about a new show coming to NBC, the family sitcom "Quackers the Shit-Eating Duck." Quackers also displays an ability to mug to the audience for applause. On the September 19 episode, Conan notes Quackers' popularity amongst viewers again and also mentions Quackers' popularity on YouTube. The episode also contains a clip of Quackers as an action star.
The Walker, Texas Ranger Lever
This sketch sprang from NBC's purchase of entertainment company UniversalUniversal Studios
Universal Pictures , a subsidiary of NBCUniversal, is one of the six major movie studios....
in early 2004, creating NBC Universal
NBC Universal
NBCUniversal Media, LLC is a media and entertainment company engaged in the production and marketing of entertainment, news, and information products and services to a global customer base...
. Conan noted that this purchase now allowed him to play clips from the show Walker, Texas Ranger
Walker, Texas Ranger
Walker, Texas Ranger is an American television action crime drama series created by Leslie Greif and Paul Haggis, and starring Chuck Norris as a member of the Texas Ranger Division. The show aired on CBS in the spring of 1993, with the first season consisting of three pilot episodes. Eight full...
starring Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris
Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris is an American martial artist and actor. After serving in the United States Air Force, he began his rise to fame as a martial artist and has since founded his own school, Chun Kuk Do...
without paying any royalties
Royalties
Royalties are usage-based payments made by one party to another for the right to ongoing use of an asset, sometimes an intellectual property...
. The "Walker Texas Ranger Lever" was a prop lever which, when pulled, would cause a supposedly random clip from the TV show to play. The clips were nearly always taken out of context and usually involved either Norris performing some improbable feat of heroics, or a particularly despicable act of violence being committed by a villain. For example one clip involved Walker tasting the dirt in a random patch of land and determining that a plane had crashed there. Another involved a man exhorting a young boy to jump from a high ledge, insisting that he would catch the youth. Yet when the boy did jump the man stepped back allowing the child to hit the ground. The sketch would usually begin with Conan introducing the premise and then commenting that he did not intend to use the lever immediately, followed by his immediately pulling it. In most instances of the sketch, Conan would comment after at least one clip that the sketch was finished, after which he would pull the lever "one last time." After a clip is played, the camera would generally cut back to Conan for a, usually shocked, reaction. In late summer 2004, the bit seemed to have been retired as Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris
Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris is an American martial artist and actor. After serving in the United States Air Force, he began his rise to fame as a martial artist and has since founded his own school, Chun Kuk Do...
walked in and fired a prop gun at Conan. Norris also revealed his own lever and pulled it, playing a clip showing him mock-fighting Conan with martial arts
Martial arts
Martial arts are extensive systems of codified practices and traditions of combat, practiced for a variety of reasons, including self-defense, competition, physical health and fitness, as well as mental and spiritual development....
moves in the back of the studio. The lever did return on occasion in 2005. Notably, the premise of the bit was technically incorrect, since Walker was owned by CBS, Sony Pictures Television
Sony Pictures Television
Sony Pictures Television, Inc. is an American and global television production/distribution subsidiary of Sony Pictures Entertainment. In turn, the latter is part of the Japanese conglomerate Sony.-Background:...
, and a few other companies; Walker just ran on NBC Universal-owned USA Network
USA Network
USA Network is an American cable television channel launched in 1971. Once a minor player in basic cable, the network has steadily gained popularity because of breakout hits like Monk, Psych, Burn Notice, Royal Pains, Covert Affairs, White Collar, Monday Night RAW, Suits, and reruns of the various...
at the time. One of the last and most popular clips to be shown was part of a "spring cleaning" segment where they were airing jokes which they had previously developed but had not aired before. With the Walker clip Conan insisted that they had been too scared to air it when they had originally discovered it, explaining "Once you see it. You'll understand why." The clip in question involved a young Haley Joel Osment
Haley Joel Osment
Haley Joel Osment is an American actor. After a series of roles in television and film during the 1990s, including a small part in Forrest Gump playing Tom Hanks' title character’s son, Osment rose to fame with his performance as Cole Sear in M...
informing the characters, in a rather cheerful manner, that "Walker told me I have AIDS
AIDS
Acquired immune deficiency syndrome or acquired immunodeficiency syndrome is a disease of the human immune system caused by the human immunodeficiency virus...
." When the camera cut back to the studio for a reaction shot, Conan simply stood up, walked to a corner of the stage where he stood for a few seconds as the audience reacted in amusement and shock, and then returned to his seat where he calmly introduced the commercial break.
The merger also led to the creation of two other short-lived triggers, a Knight Rider pull chain, and a Beverly Hills Cop
Beverly Hills Cop
Beverly Hills Cop is a 1984 American comedy-action film directed by Martin Brest and starring Eddie Murphy, Lisa Eilbacher, John Ashton, Judge Reinhold, and Ronny Cox...
Theme button. Sometimes these were combined, such as playing the Beverly Hills Cop theme behind a Walker, Texas Ranger scene.
In 2007, the lever returned, playing clips from B-grade 1970s/1980s Norris
Chuck Norris
Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris is an American martial artist and actor. After serving in the United States Air Force, he began his rise to fame as a martial artist and has since founded his own school, Chun Kuk Do...
movies (a different movie each episode). This began with the Slaughter in San Francisco
Slaughter in San Francisco
Slaughter in San Francisco is a 1974 Hong Kong martial arts action film starring Chuck Norris. This is actually Norris's first starring role in a low budget Hong Kong picture.- Summary :...
Lever (which was used during the April/May run of shows in San Francisco); Breaker! Breaker!
Breaker! Breaker!
-Plot:When a trucker Billy Dawes vanishes during his first solo run, his older brother, J.D. , sets out in search of answers. What J.D. finds, however, is a deadly conspiracy involving a corrupt small-town judge and a ring of thieves who prey upon unsuspecting motorists...
, A Force of One
A Force of One
A Force of One is a 1979 martial arts film starring Chuck Norris, Jennifer O'Neill, Ron O'Neal, Clu Gulager, and Bill Wallace. The film was directed by Paul Aaron and written by Pat E...
and The Octagon
The Octagon (film)
The Octagon is a 1980 action film with Chuck Norris in the leading role. It was directed by Eric Karson and written by Paul Aaron and Leigh Chapman. It was filmed in Los Angeles, California and released on August 14, 1980. It is notable for its inventive use of 'voice over' effects to portray the...
have also been used.
The lever also sparked its share of the Colbert/O'Brien/Stewart feud
Who Made Huckabee?
Who Made Huckabee?, also known as The Colbert/O'Brien/Stewart feud, refers to a mock rivalry that occurred among late night talk show hosts Stephen Colbert, Conan O'Brien, and Jon Stewart in early 2008, reportedly over who was responsible for then-presidential candidate Mike Huckabee's success in...
, once Norris started appearing with 2008 presidential candidate Mike Huckabee
Mike Huckabee
Michael "Mike" Dale Huckabee is an American politician who served as the 44th Governor of Arkansas from 1996 to 2007. He was a candidate in the 2008 United States Republican presidential primaries, finishing second in delegate count and third in both popular vote and number of states won . He won...
and Conan took credit for the outcomes.
In the penultimate episode of the show Conan claimed that the lever was the most requested skit on the show by fans.
Nerding It Up For Pierre
In this bit, Conan tries to explain a popular news story to graphic designer Pierre Bernard (See "Pierre Bernard's Recliner of Rage" above) by relating current events to obscure events in various animeAnime
is the Japanese abbreviated pronunciation of "animation". The definition sometimes changes depending on the context. In English-speaking countries, the term most commonly refers to Japanese animated cartoons....
or science fiction
Science fiction
Science fiction is a genre of fiction dealing with imaginary but more or less plausible content such as future settings, futuristic science and technology, space travel, aliens, and paranormal abilities...
shows that Pierre understands and enjoys, such as Battlestar Galactica
Battlestar Galactica
Battlestar Galactica is an American science fiction franchise created by Glen A. Larson. The franchise began with the Battlestar Galactica TV series in 1978, and was followed by a brief sequel TV series in 1980, a line of book adaptations, original novels, comic books, a board game, and video games...
. A previous version of this sketch was "Dumbing It Down For La Bamba", where Conan would use basic, often childish language when describing current events to the band's trombonist.
Questions From The Audience
Conan reflects on the fact that he has had a long and varied career. He offers to field any questions from the audience on some of the celebrities he has met or any other interesting aspect of his life in show-business. However the questions from the audience always relate to obscure topics such as how best to grow a plant or car maintenance advice. While Conan expresses disappointment that the question is not about his career, he is always able to give expert in-depth answers to the audience's queries.Other sketches
- 60 - "60" had been a parody of the FoxFox Broadcasting CompanyFox Broadcasting Company, commonly referred to as Fox Network or simply Fox , is an American commercial broadcasting television network owned by Fox Entertainment Group, part of Rupert Murdoch's News Corporation. Launched on October 9, 1986, Fox was the highest-rated broadcast network in the...
series 2424 (TV series)24 is an American television series produced for the Fox Network and syndicated worldwide, starring Kiefer Sutherland as Counter Terrorist Unit agent Jack Bauer. Each 24-episode season covers 24 hours in the life of Bauer, using the real time method of narration...
. "60" takes the premise of 24 to the extreme: each one second episode takes place in the same minute. The story revolved around Canadian Special Agent Chuck Aloo (Andy BlitzAndy BlitzAndrew "Andy" Blitz is an American comedian and writer best known for his sketch comedy and writing work on the late-night talk show Late Night with Conan O’Brien, where he earned 7 Emmy nominations. Blitz was born in New York City, grew up in Ridgewood, New Jersey and graduated from Columbia...
) attempting to protect the Prime MinisterPrime Minister of CanadaThe Prime Minister of Canada is the primary minister of the Crown, chairman of the Cabinet, and thus head of government for Canada, charged with advising the Canadian monarch or viceroy on the exercise of the executive powers vested in them by the constitution...
from a diabolical plot involving a sandwich with mustard in it. - Andy's Sister - This sketch involved Amy PoehlerAmy PoehlerAmy Meredith Poehler is an American comedian, actress and voice actress. She was a cast member on the NBC television entertainment show Saturday Night Live from 2001 to 2008. In 2004, she starred in the film Mean Girls with Tina Fey, with whom she worked again in Baby Mama in 2008. She is...
appearing as Andy RichterAndy RichterPaul Andrew "Andy" Richter is an American actor, writer, comedian, and late night talk show announcer. He is best known for his role as the sidekick of Conan O'Brien on each of the host's programs: Late Night and The Tonight Show on NBC, and Conan on TBS...
's little sister Stacy, who usually wore a head brace device and made fun of Andy from the audience while expressing her crush on Conan. - Audience Interview - In this bit introduced in mid-2005, Conan says that because he's always interviewing famous celebrities, who endorse their latest movie/album/etc., he rarely gets an opportunity to talk to the audience, which he says he'd like to do. So, for a change of pace, he says he's going to go into the audience, pick out a random member, and ask them some basic question. However, the gag is that the audience member he "randomly" picks is always a celebrity, who faithfully reveals him/herself when Conan asks what their name is and who always sits on the first seat immediately right of the aisle of the back row in the far righthand section. They also happen to still endorse some product, or even a standard "latest work" as well. Some examples of guests include Ted DansonTed DansonEdward Bridge “Ted” Danson III is an American actor best known for his role as central character Sam Malone in the sitcom Cheers, and his role as Dr. John Becker on the series Becker. He also plays a recurring role on Larry David's HBO sitcom Curb Your Enthusiasm and starred alongside Glenn Close...
, Jerry StillerJerry StillerGerald Isaac "Jerry" Stiller is an American comedian and actor.He spent many years in the comedy team Stiller and Meara with his wife Anne Meara...
, Alan AldaAlan AldaAlphonso Joseph D'Abruzzo , better known as Alan Alda, is an American actor, director, screenwriter, and author. A six-time Emmy Award and Golden Globe Award winner, he is best known for his role as Hawkeye Pierce in the TV series M*A*S*H...
, Bob SagetBob SagetRobert Lane "Bob" Saget is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and television host. Although he is best known for his roles as Danny Tanner in Full House, host of America's Funniest Home Videos and Future Ted Mosby on How I Met Your Mother, Saget is also known outside of television for his blue...
, Jerry SpringerJerry SpringerGerald Norman "Jerry" Springer is a British-born American television presenter, best known as host of the tabloid talk show The Jerry Springer Show since its debut in 1991...
, Donald TrumpDonald TrumpDonald John Trump, Sr. is an American business magnate, television personality and author. He is the chairman and president of The Trump Organization and the founder of Trump Entertainment Resorts. Trump's extravagant lifestyle, outspoken manner and role on the NBC reality show The Apprentice have...
, Mr. TMr. TMr. T is an American actor known for his roles as B. A. Baracus in the 1980s television series The A-Team, as boxer Clubber Lang in the 1982 film Rocky III, and for his appearances as a professional wrestler. Mr. T is known for his trademark African Mandinka warrior hairstyle, his gold jewelry,...
, FabioFabio LanzoniFabio Lanzoni ; born March 15, 1959), widely known simply as Fabio, is a famous international Italian fashion model, spokesperson and actor who appeared on the cover of hundreds of romance novels throughout the 1980s and 1990s....
, and Larry KingLarry KingLawrence Harvey "Larry" King is an American television and radio host whose work has been recognized with awards including two Peabodys and ten Cable ACE Awards....
. - Audience Talent - Conan goes into the audience and selects pre-picked audience members to show their unique talents, but the person's "talent" is obviously faked. Conan does not know who the people are going to be, and the audience does not know what their talent is until Conan reveals it. This was a very similar precursor to the Audiencey Awards.
- Billy Tyler, the Kid No One Loves - A little boy named Billy Tyler would come out talking about all the hardships he has endured in his life. Each one more pathetic than the last. Finally, when Conan offers him words of encouragement and advice, Billy rejects it screaming "You're a loser!" and running off.
- Cloppy - A depressed and suicidal horse whose name is a reference to the "clop-clop" sound he makes as he slowly walks offstage to shoot himself. In one interview, actor Nicolas CageNicolas CageNicolas Cage is an American actor, producer and director, having appeared in over 60 films including Raising Arizona , The Rock , Face/Off , Gone in 60 Seconds , Adaptation , National Treasure , Ghost Rider , Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans , and...
expresses his fondness of Cloppy. Subsequent editions of "Cloppy" have included mentions to Cage's endorsement of the sketch. - Conan and Max Hang Out - Conan introduces a moment of camaraderie between him and Max, then cuts to a scene of Conan in his dressing room. Max comes in and enthusiastically invites Conan to go somewhere, such as to lunch, to grab a beer, or to shop at the NBC store because it has great stuff. Conan happily agrees, but as soon as the two begin walking together they awkwardly do not speak to each other and look bored. The camera follows them like this down hallways and elevators until they reach their destination, at which point they quickly grab the food or drink and part ways. The destination may involve other sight gags; when Conan and Max visited the NBC store, Conan is seen shoplifting several items.
- Conan Babies - Appearing in the show's early years on Friday nights, this sketch was introduced as the day's earliest Saturday morning cartoon (since, technically, the Friday night shows aired in the early hours of Saturday). The title was a take-off of Muppet BabiesMuppet BabiesJim Henson's Muppet Babies is an American animated television series that aired from September 15, 1984 to November 2, 1991 on CBS. The show portrayed childhood versions of the Muppets living together in a large nursery in the care of a human woman called Nanny...
and the sketch itself was a parody of low-budget 1970s cartoons, featuring very limited animation of Conan, Andy, and Max as babies getting into adventures. Conan, Andy, and Max provided their own voices, and mouths, in the same Synchro-Voxed style as their Fake Celebrity Interviews. Most of Max's dialogue consisted of the word "caca" and each sketch would end with the three babies incongruously breaking out into song, à la The ArchiesThe Archie ShowThe Archie Show is a Saturday morning cartoon animated series produced by Filmation. Based on the Archie comic books, created by Bob Montana in 1941, The Archie Show debuted on CBS in September 1968 and lasted for one season. A total of 17 half-hour shows, each containing two 11 minute segments,...
or Josie and the PussycatsJosie and the Pussycats (TV series)Josie and the Pussycats is an American animated television series, based upon the Archie Comics comic book series of the same name created by Dan DeCarlo....
. - Conan's Diary - After interviewing an attractive female celebrity, Conan occasionally opens his "Hello KittyHello Kittyis a fictional character produced by the Japanese company Sanrio, first designed by Yuko Shimizu. She is portrayed as a female white Japanese bobtail cat with a red bow. The character's first appearance on an item, a vinyl coin purse, was introduced in Japan in 1974 and brought to the United States...
" diary and writes about the interview while the celebrity remains in the interview chair. The audience and celebrity can hear a voiceover of what Conan is writing. Conan admires his own interviewing skills, then notes that he thinks the celebrity has a crush on him. The celebrity, feeling awkward, asks him to stop writing. Conan audibly notes that the celebrity is an "insane bitch", and finishes writing. - Conan Sings a Lullaby - Conan explains that many viewers are new parents trying to get their baby to sleep and he will help them, so he begins to sing a nice lullaby with the aid of his acoustic guitar "Bessie Lou" (also the name of his desk, guest chair, and couch) and then takes advantage of a baby's lack of understanding of language and mentions things adults would find horrible in a soothing way. After a while, Conan figures that his main audience is getting bored, so after telling the parents to turn the baby away from the TV, he starts showing humorous and sometimes violent pieces of footage. With the baby now asleep, Conan tells the parents to go have sex.
- Crooner Ghost - Brian StackBrian StackBrian Stack is an American actor, writer and comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on all three Conan O'Brien late-night talk shows, previously working on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien, and currently on O'Brien's newest show, Conan on TBS.-Early...
portrays the ghost of an old singer "Artie Kendall", who sang when the Late Night studio was used for radio in the 1930s. Conan is talking and hears a disembodied voice singing, and a ghost appears next to his desk. The ghost doubts that people from the present would want to hear his "silly old songs", but Conan and the audience convince him. He always sings 3 songs, set to the same tune, that have outrageous lyrics. The first song is about unpopular 1930s sentiment, (where he attacks Franklin Roosevelt, advocates surrender to Adolf HitlerAdolf HitlerAdolf Hitler was an Austrian-born German politician and the leader of the National Socialist German Workers Party , commonly referred to as the Nazi Party). He was Chancellor of Germany from 1933 to 1945, and head of state from 1934 to 1945...
, or expresses contempt for the poor), the second song is always about women ("Oh...Women shouldn't be allowed to talk; we should seal their lips with strong adhesive caulk") and after Conan's reaction to it, the ghost notes his "hot, IrishIrish peopleThe Irish people are an ethnic group who originate in Ireland, an island in northwestern Europe. Ireland has been populated for around 9,000 years , with the Irish people's earliest ancestors recorded having legends of being descended from groups such as the Nemedians, Fomorians, Fir Bolg, Tuatha...
temper" and sings a derogatory song about the Irish. ("Irish people's brains are made of corn, and they all get drunk before they're even born.") He usually ends the songs with a relevant scat such as "boppity-drown" or "Hitlery-hoo." - Dudez-A-Plenti - Conan decides to form his very own boy band following the success of the Backstreet BoysBackstreet BoysThe Backstreet Boys are an American vocal group, formed in Orlando, Florida in 1993. The band originally consisted of A. J. McLean, Howie Dorough, Brian Littrell, Nick Carter and Kevin Richardson. They rose to fame with their debut international album, Backstreet Boys...
and the show Making The BandMaking the BandMaking the Band is an ABC/MTV reality television series that exists in separate iterations, each iteration focusing on a specific music act. It spawned musical acts O-Town, Da Band, Danity Kane, Day26, and Donnie Klang...
. He calls for an audition, in which he picks 5 buff young men: Elliot, Professor P, Iago, the Kid Man, and Samantha. In their first group meeting, they think of ideas for their first hit song, only to come up with the words "Baby" and "I Wish". This leads to their first "hit" single: "Baby, I Wish You Were My Baby". The group reunites one year later to record their first music video for a new song called "Awesome", which includes the word "awesome" 28 times according to Conan. - European Guy - Conan begins to discuss some political issue negatively affecting America, and is interrupted by Gustavo, a European who smugly and arrogantly points out Europe's superiority over America. He appears in strange clothing (particularly shoes) and frequently eats strange lollipops, all of which have stereotypically silly European-sounding names (Stolflucht, Flexenfüsser, etc.), which he defends as superior to their American equivalents, in spite of their peculiar appearances.
- Friends of the Show - Conan is frequently visited by Mr. TMr. TMr. T is an American actor known for his roles as B. A. Baracus in the 1980s television series The A-Team, as boxer Clubber Lang in the 1982 film Rocky III, and for his appearances as a professional wrestler. Mr. T is known for his trademark African Mandinka warrior hairstyle, his gold jewelry,...
, Abe VigodaAbe VigodaAbe Vigoda is an American movie and television actor. Vigoda is well known for his portrayal of Sal Tessio in The Godfather, and for his portrayal of Detective Sgt. Phil Fish on the sitcom television series Barney Miller from 1975–1977 and on its spinoff show Fish that aired from February 1977 to...
, and James LiptonJames LiptonJames Lipton is an American writer, poet, composer, actor and dean emeritus of the Actors Studio Drama School at Pace University in New York City. He is the executive producer, writer and host of the Bravo cable television series Inside the Actors Studio, which debuted in 1994...
as themselves, who appear in bizarre situations on the show. Abe Vigoda is often poked fun of for his advanced age, fueled by the false reports of his death in the past. Memorable bits featuring Vigoda involve him being found in odd places by Conan, such as under the audience risers, being dressed up as a character such as "ViyodaYodaYoda is a fictional character in the Star Wars universe, appearing in the second and third original films, as well as all three prequel trilogy films. A renowned Jedi master, Yoda made his first on-screen appearance in Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back where he is responsible for...
", and using the extra screen space afforded by the widescreen 16:9 HDTV format to shoot basketsBasketballBasketball is a team sport in which two teams of five players try to score points by throwing or "shooting" a ball through the top of a basketball hoop while following a set of rules...
, with Vigoda on one side of Conan and the basket on the other. Mr. T appears both in the show's regular segments, such as Celebrity Secrets, and in remotes, such as going to an apple orchard with Conan. Lipton typically appears to lend his serious acting abilities to humorous situations, such as a dramatic re-enactment of Christian BaleChristian BaleChristian Charles Philip Bale is an English actor. Best known for his roles in American films, Bale has starred in both big budget Hollywood films and the smaller projects from independent producers and art houses....
's 2009 profanity-laced tirade towards a director of photography, with Lipton playing both Bale and the crew member. - The "Fun Hole" Guy - Conan gets interrupted by a man in the audience (played by Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
) who wears a blue t-shirt with a sweater around his shoulders. He complains about lack of decency, takes the sweater off and storms off, revealing him wearing fishnet stockings, and a shirt that says "Fun Hole" on the back with an arrow pointing down to his speedoSpeedoSpeedo International Ltd. is a manufacturer and distributor of swimwear and swim-related accessories. Founded in Australia in 1914, the industry leading company is now a subsidiary of Pentland Group Plc. Today, the Speedo brand can be found on products ranging from swimsuits and goggles to wrist...
-clad buttocksButtocksThe buttocks are two rounded portions of the anatomy, located on the posterior of the pelvic region of apes and humans, and many other bipeds or quadrupeds, and comprise a layer of fat superimposed on the gluteus maximus and gluteus medius muscles. Physiologically, the buttocks enable weight to...
. - Good Priest, Bad Priest - Conan's Catholic church pastors, Father DeCarlo and Father Kelly, would come on the show and subject Conan to an interrogation related to some sort of upcoming religious celebration (Such as why he does not have a manger for ChristmasChristmasChristmas or Christmas Day is an annual holiday generally celebrated on December 25 by billions of people around the world. It is a Christian feast that commemorates the birth of Jesus Christ, liturgically closing the Advent season and initiating the season of Christmastide, which lasts twelve days...
). Most of the time, they start to abuse Conan by bringing up his "touching himselfMasturbationMasturbation refers to sexual stimulation of a person's own genitals, usually to the point of orgasm. The stimulation can be performed manually, by use of objects or tools, or by some combination of these methods. Masturbation is a common form of autoeroticism...
" nightly. Father DeCarlo acts as the "Good Priest", asking questions calmly, while Father Kelly would act as the "Bad Priest", trying to intimidate Conan. Towards the end of the sketch, JesusJesusJesus of Nazareth , commonly referred to as Jesus Christ or simply as Jesus or Christ, is the central figure of Christianity...
enters, resulting in Conan exclaiming "Jesus Christ!", and tells the priests to leave Conan alone, and recruiting them on a more important mission, usually abusing figures such as Santa ClausSanta ClausSanta Claus is a folklore figure in various cultures who distributes gifts to children, normally on Christmas Eve. Each name is a variation of Saint Nicholas, but refers to Santa Claus...
and the Easter BunnyEaster BunnyThe Easter Bunny or Easter Rabbit is a character depicted as a rabbit bringing Easter eggs, who sometimes is depicted with clothes...
. The sketch ends with Jesus telling Conan and the crowd "You owe me one... you all owe me one!" In recent episodes Jesus has been joined by Mary (resulting in Conan yelling "Holy Mother of God!") and Joseph (resulting in Conan yelling "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!"), then the skit ends with Jesus, Mary, and Joseph going to the Olive GardenOlive GardenOlive Garden is an American restaurant chain specializing in Italian-American cuisine. It is a subsidiary of Darden Restaurants, Inc., which is headquartered in an unincorporated area in Orange County, Florida, near Orlando. Olive Garden operates more than 730 locations globally.- History :The...
and running into God then awkwardly having a conversation about God being Jesus' real father. - Guest Autographs - Conan shows the audience some autographs supposedly from guests on his show. In reality, the fictitious autographs are often from celebrities who have appeared in newsNewsNews is the communication of selected information on current events which is presented by print, broadcast, Internet, or word of mouth to a third party or mass audience.- Etymology :...
or tabloids rather than on the program. The messages left by the celebrity often mock something unseemly the celebrity is currently known for or may even mock O'Brien in some way. - Guys That Make Fun of Conan's Name - In the first year of the show, Conan would occasionally point out that he has an unusual first name that often makes people think of Conan the BarbarianConan the BarbarianConan the Barbarian is a fictional sword and sorcery hero that originated in pulp fiction magazines and has since been adapted to books, comics, several films , television programs, video games, roleplaying games and other media...
. The show would then cut to four guys who stand around and make bad jokes about Conan's name, such as "Conan the vegetarian, hey, where's your salad?" or "Conan the Yogi BearYogi BearYogi Bear is a fictional bear who appears in animated cartoons created by Hanna-Barbera Productions. He made his debut in 1958 as a supporting character in The Huckleberry Hound Show. Yogi Bear was the first breakout character created by Hanna-Barbera, and was eventually more popular than...
-ian, hey, where's Boo-Boo?" For unexplained reasons, one of the four guys in the sketch would always nod in agreement, but never speak. - Instant Audience Member Upgrade - A take-off on the airline instant upgrade, Conan chooses two audience members and bumps them up to first class audience, where he gives them more comfortable chairs, a drink, a celebrity feature, a curtain to separate them from the economy class audience section, etc.
- Moral Dilemma - Not seen since Andy Richter's departure (although he was barely involved), the bit involved Conan looking through the show's Lost and FoundLost and FoundLost and Found is the third full-length album by Mudvayne. The album was released on April 12, 2005 through Epic Records. The album had major success in the U.S., debuting at number #2 and being certified Gold by the RIAA shortly afterward. It has sold about 800,000 copies as of August 2006...
box, and finding something he wished he could keep. At that point, a devil would appear on Conan's shoulderShoulder angelA shoulder angel is a plot device used for either dramatic or humorous effect in animation and comic strips . The angel represents conscience and is often accompanied by a shoulder devil representing temptation. They are handy for easily showing inner conflict of a character...
to help him rationalize keeping the item. While he would acknowledge the logic behind the devil's reasoning, he would muse, "I can't help but wonder if there's another side to the argument." At this point, instead of the expected angel, a bear (an actor in a bear costume) would appear on Conan's other shoulder, announcing himself: "Hi, Conan, I'm your bear! Grrr!" Conan would ask the bear for his advice regarding the lost item, but the bear would only have bear-related advice to offer ("I don't know, but I can tell you that you should always check before sticking your nose into a beehive, for bears' noses are awfully sensitive to bee stings"). Usually, the bit would end with the devil getting one-upped in some way or another (in one such sketch, the bear turned out to be Conan's guardian angel in disguise). - No-Reason-to-Live Guy - Conan begins to talk about a mundane news piece or the guest line-up at his desk when he is interrupted by a man in the audience (played by Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
). The man seems to have been misinformed and reacts to Conan's calm correctness in disbelief and yells, "There's no reason to live!" He then proceeds to run to the top of the audience area where a blue kayak is waiting, while yelling, "Where's my kayak?" He gets in the kayak and "paddles" it off-screen, at which point the scene cuts to a shot of a man in a kayak falling down an icy mountain. After this, another "audience member" usually rides off in a kayak in a similar way, or the first man comes back through the studio doors (sometimes in poor disguises), gets upset again (usually when Conan mentions how stupid the sketch is) and rides to his demise using another means of transportation, accompanied by related stock footage, again while yelling "Where's my [vehicle]?" The sketch usually involves three different "deaths." In addition to the kayak, other means of transportation have included a train, a bike, a skateboard, balloons, a three bedroom house, and a car.- This sketch evolved from a bit done a week or two before NBC broadcast the Torino Olympics2006 Winter OlympicsThe 2006 Winter Olympics, officially known as the XX Olympic Winter Games, was a winter multi-sport event which was celebrated in Turin, Italy from February 10, 2006, through February 26, 2006. This marked the second time Italy hosted the Olympic Winter Games, the first being the VII Olympic Winter...
where Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
appeared on video as if he was reporting from the Bobsled run in Italy. He starts sliding down the course and Conan tries to tell him the course was not finished, based on news reports of the time that said Olympic officials were crunched for time to finish some of the venues. McCann says he cannot hear because of the noise of the bobsled then he says, "What's that?" and there is a quick cut to stock footage of a kayak falling down a snow covered mountain. Then the show cuts back to Conan who has his head in his hands as if embarrassed and the audience is howling in laughter at the absurd scene, especially after McCann's line: "Someone put me in a kayak!" When the next guest comments about the kayak, Conan says, "You try to find footage of a bobsled crashing that matches. It was the best we could do." For the record, the Olympic officials were putting finishing touches on the venues with only the nightly ceremonies park unfinished.
- This sketch evolved from a bit done a week or two before NBC broadcast the Torino Olympics
- Patterns - Conan shows a series of images, and viewers have to figure out the progressive pattern that links them. For instance, "Squirrel, handyman, poorly guarded insane asylum, Tom GreenTom GreenMichael Thomas "Tom" Green is a Canadian actor, rapper, writer, comedian, talk show host and media personality. Best known for his shock humour brand of comedy, Green found mainstream prominence via his MTV television show The Tom Green Show...
: That's right, these are more and more likely to be missing a nut." - Pimpbot 5000 - A robot that combines the technology of a futuristic android with the street-wise attitude of a 1970's pimpPimpA pimp is an agent for prostitutes who collects part of their earnings. The pimp may receive this money in return for advertising services, physical protection, or for providing a location where she may engage clients...
. He always talks in rhymes that simultaneously reference his robotic and pimp nature: "I got a diamond studded watch/new transistors in my crotch." - Pleasing the Affiliates - Conan attempts to please local affiliateAffiliateAn affiliate is a commercial entity with a relationship with a peer or a larger entity.- Corporate structure :A corporation may be referred to as an affiliate of another when it is related to it but not strictly controlled by it, as with a subsidiary relationship, or when it is desired to avoid...
s by responding to their fictional requests for positive mention. - Polly the NBC Peacock - Only seen in the first few seasons of the show, Conan has a discussion with Polly the NBC Peacock, which is actually just a cardboard cut out of an NBC peacock logo with a moving mouth. The sketch revolves around Conan discussing television programs airing the current week. When NBC shows are mentioned, Polly lavishes praise upon them, when non-NBC shows are mentioned, Polly criticizes them harshly. With Conan playing the straight manDouble actA double act, also known as a comedy duo, is a comic pairing in which humor is derived from the uneven relationship between two partners, usually of the same gender, age, ethnic origin and profession, but drastically different personalities or behavior...
, Polly's comments get progressively more outlandish, such as claiming that "A lot of people don't know it, but Tim AllenTim AllenTim Allen is an American comedian, actor, voice-over artist, and entertainer, known for his role in the sitcom Home Improvement...
's face spews dangerous radiation" during a discussion of ABC sitcom Home Improvement, or claiming that "Watching the show officially fulfills your requirement for jury duty" when discussing the NBC legal drama JAGJAG (TV series)JAG is an American adventure/legal drama television show that was produced by Belisarius Productions, in association with Paramount Network Television and, for the first season only, NBC Productions...
. The sketch usually ends with Conan suggesting the audience watch a non-NBC program, to which a flustered Polly replies, "It's in Spanish!" - Preparation H Raymond - In this sketch Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
plays a large-eared man named Raymond with a Prince Charles-like appearance, who parades down the aisles passing out Preparation HPreparation HPreparation H is a brand of medications, manufactured by Pfizer, used in the treatment of hemorrhoids.Preparation H dates from about 1935. It was originally packaged in a tube like toothpaste, with a similar consistency...
to Conan's audience. While he possesses a common theme song, chorused by the phrase "Raymond's here to help....oooooooohhh...", Raymond's dialogue content is often related to current events such as the "roidSteroidA steroid is a type of organic compound that contains a characteristic arrangement of four cycloalkane rings that are joined to each other. Examples of steroids include the dietary fat cholesterol, the sex hormones estradiol and testosterone, and the anti-inflammatory drug dexamethasone.The core...
" usage by pro baseball athletes or ThanksgivingThanksgiving (United States)Thanksgiving, or Thanksgiving Day, is a holiday celebrated in the United States on the fourth Thursday in November. It has officially been an annual tradition since 1863, when, during the Civil War, President Abraham Lincoln proclaimed a national day of thanksgiving to be celebrated on Thursday,...
, 2006. Often though, the sketch can be seen as a random assortment of ideas, all beginning and culminating with the distribution of Preparation H. - Queen Elizabeth Telephone Call - Conan receives a phone call from Queen Elizabeth II to discuss a current issue. Her Majesty quickly gets off topic, and ends every comment by referring to Conan using random bisyllabic words, such as Coughdrop O'Branflakes.
- Rude Audience Member - While Conan is introducing the second guest, the camera repeatedly cuts to one audience member, with each successive cut introducing attention-grabbing sound and visual effects. Conan becomes increasingly agitated, chastising the person as if he or she is purposely making it happen. After he threatens to call security, the camera stays on Conan, and it seems like the distraction is over. Finally, the audience member is shown in a much more exaggerated way (for example, on a giant screen behind Conan, or on the Times SquareTimes SquareTimes Square is a major commercial intersection in the borough of Manhattan in New York City, at the junction of Broadway and Seventh Avenue and stretching from West 42nd to West 47th Streets...
JumbotronJumbotronA JumboTron is a large-screen television using technology developed by Sony, typically used in sports stadiums and concert venues to show close-up shots of the event. Although JumboTron is a registered trademark owned by the Sony Corporation, the word jumbotron is often used by the public as a...
) that completely disrupts the show. - Satellite TV - Conan shares the extra channels that the large satellite dish on the roof of 30 Rockefeller Center fictionally picks up. Some channels have absurd titles like "Clive Clemmons' Inappropriate Response Channel" (this particular channel displayed clips of people making inappropriate and/or completely off-topic statements in everyday conversation, after which fictional British heavy metalHeavy metal musicHeavy metal is a genre of rock music that developed in the late 1960s and early 1970s, largely in the Midlands of the United Kingdom and the United States...
guitarist Clive Clemmons plays a riff and exclaims "Inappropriate!" One example had a woman mention the quality of the office coffee, to which her co-worker responded "Thank God for Saddam HusseinSaddam HusseinSaddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti was the fifth President of Iraq, serving in this capacity from 16 July 1979 until 9 April 2003...
!"). Others include a pornographyPornographyPornography or porn is the explicit portrayal of sexual subject matter for the purposes of sexual arousal and erotic satisfaction.Pornography may use any of a variety of media, ranging from books, magazines, postcards, photos, sculpture, drawing, painting, animation, sound recording, film, video,...
channel featuring "Max on Max action", in which Max Weinberg made love to a duplicate Max Weinberg; the "Sexual Harassment Skeleton Channel", wherein a skeleton gropes women in the workplace but always avoids getting fired, with the argument that he is "only a skeleton" and "doesn't even have muscles to move his arms." There is "Jar Barf", a program wherein food jarJarA jar is a rigid, approximately cylindrical container with a wide mouth or opening. Jars are typically made of glass, ceramic, or plastic. They are used for foods, cosmetics, medications, and chemicals that are relatively thick or viscous...
s with the middle of their lids cut out, and featuring added googly eyes, are shown vomiting their contents; the "Potato Judge TV", about a ruthless judge on the judicial bench; and the "Men Without Hats Channel" that features people in everyday situations singing about it to the Men Without HatsMen Without HatsMen Without Hats is a Canadian New Wave group from Montreal, Quebec. Their music was characterized by the distinctive baritone voice of their lead singer Ivan Doroschuk as well as their elaborate use of synthesizers and electronic processing...
tune "Safety Dance". (One involved a man in an office singing "You can file if you want to/You can leave your friends behind/Because your friends don't file/And if they don't file then they're no friends of mine.") - Spoiler Alert - Conan and Max talk about a recent film, TV, or book-related story, but find a way to keep from spoiling the ending, in case the show is TivoTiVoTiVo is a digital video recorder developed and marketed by TiVo, Inc. and introduced in 1999. TiVo provides an on-screen guide of scheduled broadcast programming television programs, whose features include "Season Pass" schedules which record every new episode of a series, and "WishList"...
ed, or a viewer has not read the book. So Conan employs a spoiler alert system, which consists of two people standing in front of the camera, covering their ears and yelling incoherently "la la la la la! I'm not listening", the result of which is that the audience is unable to listen to what Conan and Max are discussing. - Traveling Salesman - A traveling salesman who stops by to sell Conan a variety of useless items. He talks in a fast-paced New York accent sprinkled with 1920s colloquialisms, and frequently makes self-deprecating cracks as he describes his wares. He always tries to sell Conan lame jokes from "Joke Co." and immediately expects payment.
- Unknown Colleges' Team Mascots - Conan presents about three or four fictional colleges' athletic teams' mascots. These mascots often have nothing to do with anything about the school's location or name. One mascot that always finds its way onto the segment is S&M Lincoln, a very disturbing version of Abraham LincolnAbraham LincolnAbraham Lincoln was the 16th President of the United States, serving from March 1861 until his assassination in April 1865. He successfully led his country through a great constitutional, military and moral crisis – the American Civil War – preserving the Union, while ending slavery, and...
wearing a top hat and having a ball gag stuffed in his mouth, while being dressed in little more than leather S&M gear and being weighed down by heavy chains, while whipping himself with a cat o' nine tailsCat o' nine tailsThe cat o' nine tails, commonly shortened to the cat, is a type of multi-tailed whipping device that originated as an implement for severe physical punishment, notably in the Royal Navy and Army of the United Kingdom, and also as a judicial punishment in Britain and some other...
. - What in the World? - Conan is shown an extremely magnified portion of a picture. He throws out a wild guess as to what he is looking at, at which point the picture is zoomed out a little. Conan tries again, although it's not yet evident what is depicted in the photo. It zooms out again, and the picture is now recognizable and seemingly mundane—for instance, a celebrity or other normal situation. The final time it zooms out, something unexpected or outrageous that had previously been out of frame is revealed. The opening audio cue for this bit is an annoying-sounding man saying, "What in the world?" which Conan often asks not to have repeated, to no avail.
Annual sketches
- The State of the Show Address - An elaborate parodyParodyA parody , in current usage, is an imitative work created to mock, comment on, or trivialise an original work, its subject, author, style, or some other target, by means of humorous, satiric or ironic imitation...
of the President of the United StatesPresident of the United StatesThe President of the United States of America is the head of state and head of government of the United States. The president leads the executive branch of the federal government and is the commander-in-chief of the United States Armed Forces....
' annual State of the Union AddressState of the Union AddressThe State of the Union is an annual address presented by the President of the United States to the United States Congress. The address not only reports on the condition of the nation but also allows the president to outline his legislative agenda and his national priorities.The practice arises...
delivered in place of the show's opening credits and monologue on the same night the President gives his speech. When Conan mentions that there will be no monologue that night, the audience will stand and burst into hearty applause, after which Conan replies, "You bastards." - Central Time Zone New Year's Countdown - Aired each New Year's EveNew Year's EveNew Year's Eve is observed annually on December 31, the final day of any given year in the Gregorian calendar. In modern societies, New Year's Eve is often celebrated at social gatherings, during which participants dance, eat, consume alcoholic beverages, and watch or light fireworks to mark the...
, Late Night was the only show to do a countdown to midnight for the Central Time Zone of the United States, since the show's regular time slot begins before and ends after midnight Central Time. After the monologue, Conan does a fictional list of people who have died that year, starting with a celebrity who has faded into obscurity who many believe has died, and continuing with many outlandish and random celebrities who are obviously alive. Each year the Late Night staff creates a bit when the New Year begins. In 2003, the bit was announcer Joel Godard lying on a table while an Asian man wearing a SpeedoSpeedoSpeedo International Ltd. is a manufacturer and distributor of swimwear and swim-related accessories. Founded in Australia in 1914, the industry leading company is now a subsidiary of Pentland Group Plc. Today, the Speedo brand can be found on products ranging from swimsuits and goggles to wrist...
lands on top of him at the stroke of midnight. In 2005, giant papier-mâchéPapier-mâchéPapier-mâché , alternatively, paper-mache, is a composite material consisting of paper pieces or pulp, sometimes reinforced with textiles, bound with an adhesive, such as glue, starch, or wallpaper paste....
busts of ChicagoChicagoChicago is the largest city in the US state of Illinois. With nearly 2.7 million residents, it is the most populous city in the Midwestern United States and the third most populous in the US, after New York City and Los Angeles...
ans James BelushiJames BelushiJames Adam "Jim" Belushi is an American actor, comedian, and musician. He is the younger brother of comic actor John Belushi.-Early life:Belushi was born in Chicago...
and Oprah WinfreyOprah WinfreyOprah Winfrey is an American media proprietor, talk show host, actress, producer and philanthropist. Winfrey is best known for her self-titled, multi-award-winning talk show, which has become the highest-rated program of its kind in history and was nationally syndicated from 1986 to 2011...
inched slowly towards each other and "French kissFrench kissA French kiss is a kiss in which one participant's tongue touches the partner's lips or tongue and usually enters his or her mouth. A French kiss is a slow passionate kiss which is usually considered intimate, romantic, erotic or sexual...
ed" at the stroke of midnight. Earlier remotes had Conan going out to various remote locations in the Central Time Zone to celebrate the new year there. One bit had the remote correspondent already celebrating the new year in South Bend, IndianaSouth Bend, IndianaThe city of South Bend is the county seat of St. Joseph County, Indiana, United States, on the St. Joseph River near its southernmost bend, from which it derives its name. As of the 2010 Census, the city had a total of 101,168 residents; its Metropolitan Statistical Area had a population of 316,663...
(which is in the Eastern Time ZoneEastern Time ZoneThe Eastern Time Zone of the United States and Canada is a time zone that falls mostly along the east coast of North America. Its UTC time offset is −5 hrs during standard time and −4 hrs during daylight saving time...
, one hour ahead of Central Time), but having to move to the Central Time Zone city of Gary, IndianaGary, IndianaGary is a city in Lake County, Indiana, United States. The city is in the southeastern portion of the Chicago metropolitan area and is 25 miles from downtown Chicago. The population is 80,294 at the 2010 census, making it the seventh-largest city in the state. It borders Lake Michigan and is known...
in a race against time in order to "correctly" celebrate the new year. The 2004 and 2005 celebrations also had O'Brien joined by a group of costumed revellers (representing various MidwestMidwestern United StatesThe Midwestern United States is one of the four U.S. geographic regions defined by the United States Census Bureau, providing an official definition of the American Midwest....
ern locales) including:
- Abraham LincolnAbraham LincolnAbraham Lincoln was the 16th President of the United States, serving from March 1861 until his assassination in April 1865. He successfully led his country through a great constitutional, military and moral crisis – the American Civil War – preserving the Union, while ending slavery, and...
(Springfield, IllinoisSpringfield, IllinoisSpringfield is the third and current capital of the US state of Illinois and the county seat of Sangamon County with a population of 117,400 , making it the sixth most populated city in the state and the second most populated Illinois city outside of the Chicago Metropolitan Area...
) - A Green Bay PackersGreen Bay PackersThe Green Bay Packers are an American football team based in Green Bay, Wisconsin. They are members of the North Division of the National Football Conference in the National Football League . The Packers are the current NFL champions...
"cheeseheadCheeseheadCheesehead is a nickname, sometimes used disparagingly, referring to a person from Wisconsin, referring to the large volume of cheese production of the state...
" fan - DorothyDorothy GaleDorothy Gale is the protagonist of many of the Oz novels by American author L. Frank Baum, and the best friend of Oz's ruler Princess Ozma. Dorothy first appears in Baum's classic children's novel The Wonderful Wizard of Oz and reappears in most of its sequels...
from The Wonderful Wizard of OzThe Wonderful Wizard of OzThe Wonderful Wizard of Oz is a children's novel written by L. Frank Baum and illustrated by W. W. Denslow. Originally published by the George M. Hill Company in Chicago on May 17, 1900, it has since been reprinted numerous times, most often under the name The Wizard of Oz, which is the name of...
(KansasKansasKansas is a US state located in the Midwestern United States. It is named after the Kansas River which flows through it, which in turn was named after the Kansa Native American tribe, which inhabited the area. The tribe's name is often said to mean "people of the wind" or "people of the south...
) - PrincePrince (musician)Prince Rogers Nelson , often known simply as Prince, is an American singer, songwriter, musician, and actor. Prince has produced ten platinum albums and thirty Top 40 singles during his career. Prince founded his own recording studio and label; writing, self-producing and playing most, or all, of...
(MinneapolisMinneapolis, MinnesotaMinneapolis , nicknamed "City of Lakes" and the "Mill City," is the county seat of Hennepin County, the largest city in the U.S. state of Minnesota, and the 48th largest in the United States...
) - A gauchoGauchoGaucho is a term commonly used to describe residents of the South American pampas, chacos, or Patagonian grasslands, found principally in parts of Argentina, Uruguay, Southern Chile, and Southern Brazil...
from BelizeBelizeBelize is a constitutional monarchy and the northernmost country in Central America. Belize has a diverse society, comprising many cultures and languages. Even though Kriol and Spanish are spoken among the population, Belize is the only country in Central America where English is the official...
(Belize is in the same time zone as the Central US)
The countdown did not air on New Year's Eve in both 2005-06 and 2006–07, as these dates were on Saturday and Sunday night respectively. NBC carried live specials with Carson Daly
Carson Daly
Carson Jones Daly is an American television host. He is the host of NBC's Last Call with Carson Daly, a late-night talk show that began airing on January 7, 2002. Before his role as host of that program, Daly was a VJ on MTV's TRL, and a DJ for the Southern California based radio station KROQ-FM...
on these occasions. Another such special aired for 2007-08 (a Monday night); a writer's strike
2007–2008 Writers Guild of America strike
The 2007–2008 Writers Guild of America strike, more commonly referred to as simply the Writers' Strike, was a strike by the Writers Guild of America, East and the Writers Guild of America, West ....
meant Late Night could not have resumed its Central Time countdown that year in any event. As of 2008-09, the Carson Daly specials appear to have supplanted the special New Year's Tonight and Late Night episodes permanently (repeats of both shows now follow the live special).
- Sweeps Ahoy - Airing during or just after each "sweeps month", this sketch airs bits and doctored footage of previous Late Night publicity stunts the show did to increase their ratings.
- World's Fastest Menorah and Other Holiday Icons - Usually shown for a period of 3–4 days after the annual lighting of the Rockefeller CenterRockefeller CenterRockefeller Center is a complex of 19 commercial buildings covering between 48th and 51st streets in New York City, United States. Built by the Rockefeller family, it is located in the center of Midtown Manhattan, spanning the area between Fifth Avenue and Sixth Avenue. It was declared a National...
Christmas Tree, Conan always mentions that so many people come to New York just to see the tree, usually adding things like, "It's just a tree! Big deal!" He then says something like, "Rockefeller Center might have their Christmas Tree, but we here at Late Night have the World's Fastest Menorah!" This summons the menorah, which sits on a platform pulled by a string by a stagehand, flying by the camera lever. Of course, the platform is not visible in the camera's field of vision. The menorah is accompanied by a quick excerpt of "Hava Nagila". As the week progresses, Conan introduces other holiday icons, which include a bungee-jumping Baby Jesus (accompanied by Handel's "Hallelujah"), a rocket-powered fruitcakeFruitcakeFruitcake is a cake made with chopped candied fruit and/or dried fruit, nuts, and spices, and soaked in spirits. A cake that simply has fruit in it as an ingredient can also be colloquially called a fruitcake. In the United Kingdom, certain rich versions may be iced and decorated...
(accompanied by ZZ TopZZ TopZZ Top is an American rock band, sometimes referred to as "That Little Ol' Band from Texas". Their style, which is rooted in blues-based boogie rock, has come to incorporate elements of arena, southern, and boogie rock. The band, from Houston Texas, formed in 1969...
's "La Grange"), and a KwanzaaKwanzaaKwanzaa is a week long celebration held in the United States honoring universal African-American heritage and culture, observed from December 26 to January 1 each year. It features activities such as lighting a candle holder with seven candles and culminates in a feast and gift giving...
kinaraKinaraThe kinara is the candle holder used in Kwanzaa celebrations in the United States. During the week-long celebration of Kwanzaa, seven candles are placed in the kinara - three red on the left, three green on the right, and a single black candle in the center...
in a pimped-out ride. - A Look Back - Sometime around New Year's, a retrospective of the past year on the show. Conan and Max sit at a mini-bar on stage with party decorations, their ties undone, and recall their many adventures.
- An alternate version is presented in the form of a newsreelNewsreelA newsreel was a form of short documentary film prevalent in the first half of the 20th century, regularly released in a public presentation place and containing filmed news stories and items of topical interest. It was a source of news, current affairs and entertainment for millions of moviegoers...
, with Joel GodardJoel GodardJoel Clinton Godard, Jr. is an American television presenter, best known as the announcer for Late Night with Conan O'Brien during its entire 16-year run from 1993 to 2009.-Early life:...
narrating events of the year over real footage, intercut with relevant Fake celebrity interviews from the past year.
During the 2007-08 writers' strike
While WGA was on strike, the show was unable to use any of its regular sketches or characters. As such, a small series of new sketches was devised to keep viewers entertained, or to just kill time.- Ring Spin - As he has done for years during rehearsals, Conan began spinning his wedding ring on his desk, attempting to break his record of 41 seconds. The closest he came was 40 seconds until the February 8, 2008 broadcast when, with the help of MIT professor Dr. Peter Fisher, he spun the ring for 51 seconds on a piece of teflon. On June 8, 2008, the bit appeared again, this time with Conan accepting a challenge from guest Ted KoppelTed KoppelEdward James "Ted" Koppel is an English-born American broadcast journalist, best known as the anchor for Nightline from the program's inception in 1980 until his retirement in late 2005. After leaving Nightline, Koppel worked as managing editor for the Discovery Channel before resigning in 2008...
. Conan won the challenge by a mere 3 seconds, with a total of 30 seconds against Koppel's 27. On November 6, 2008, scheduled guest Katt WilliamsKatt WilliamsMicah S. Katt Williams is a U.S. comedian, rapper, and actor. He is best known for his role as Money Mike in Friday After Next...
failed to show for his guest spot (it was later revealed he had been arrested on weapons charges). To fill some time, Conan performed a ring spin - saying that two historic eventsBarack ObamaBarack Hussein Obama II is the 44th and current President of the United States. He is the first African American to hold the office. Obama previously served as a United States Senator from Illinois, from January 2005 until he resigned following his victory in the 2008 presidential election.Born in...
could happen within a 24 hour span. - German Disco Light Show - By pressing a button Conan starts a light show similar to one seen at a "bad German disco." This has been done several times using various musical tracks.
- Guest Maze Entrance - To increase the length of time taken for celebrities to reach the desk, a short maze is erected between the entry point and the desk. An overhead camera shows the guests' progression through the maze.
- Who Made Huckabee?Who Made Huckabee?Who Made Huckabee?, also known as The Colbert/O'Brien/Stewart feud, refers to a mock rivalry that occurred among late night talk show hosts Stephen Colbert, Conan O'Brien, and Jon Stewart in early 2008, reportedly over who was responsible for then-presidential candidate Mike Huckabee's success in...
- Conan had a recurring mock feud with Comedy CentralComedy CentralComedy Central is an American cable television and satellite television channel that carries comedy programming, both original and syndicated....
hosts Stephen ColbertStephen ColbertStephen Tyrone Colbert is an American political satirist, writer, comedian, television host, and actor. He is the host of Comedy Central's The Colbert Report, a satirical news show in which Colbert portrays a caricatured version of conservative political pundits.Colbert originally studied to be an...
and Jon StewartJon StewartJon Stewart is an American political satirist, writer, television host, actor, media critic and stand-up comedian...
regarding who was responsible for the success of presidential candidate Mike HuckabeeMike HuckabeeMichael "Mike" Dale Huckabee is an American politician who served as the 44th Governor of Arkansas from 1996 to 2007. He was a candidate in the 2008 United States Republican presidential primaries, finishing second in delegate count and third in both popular vote and number of states won . He won...
. Conan noted that the popularity of Huckabee's high-profile supporter Chuck NorrisChuck NorrisCarlos Ray "Chuck" Norris is an American martial artist and actor. After serving in the United States Air Force, he began his rise to fame as a martial artist and has since founded his own school, Chun Kuk Do...
was the result of his own Walker, Texas Ranger Lever sketch, therefore "Conan made Huckabee." Colbert, on his show, then claimed that "Colbert made Huckabee" after giving him the "Colbert Bump." Following a series of cross-show statements, Conan, Colbert and Stewart each put forward increasingly farcical reasons why he was responsible for Huckabee's success, insulting their rivals in the process. Eventually, a large (and silly) fight scene amongst the three was staged on Late Night. Huckabee himself appeared afterwards to state that none of "these three idiots" created him, but in fact the "great nation of the United States had created him". - Zipline - On January 14, 2008, Conan lived out one of his "dreams" by riding a zipline over his audience while wearing a helmet which shoots smoke out the back. Conan then asked viewers to send in suggestions on how to improve this stunt via http://www.latenightunderground.com. Two days later, Conan repeated the zipline this time with rockets strapped to his feet and crashing into large bowling pins. Another variation of this sketch is when he went down the zip line and knocked down John Wilkes BoothJohn Wilkes BoothJohn Wilkes Booth was an American stage actor who assassinated President Abraham Lincoln at Ford's Theatre, in Washington, D.C., on April 14, 1865. Booth was a member of the prominent 19th century Booth theatrical family from Maryland and, by the 1860s, was a well-known actor...
as he was about to assassinate Abraham LincolnAbraham LincolnAbraham Lincoln was the 16th President of the United States, serving from March 1861 until his assassination in April 1865. He successfully led his country through a great constitutional, military and moral crisis – the American Civil War – preserving the Union, while ending slavery, and...
. - Crew Interview - He also filled in some of his episodes by interviewing the behind-the-scenes crew members, such as the propmaster or the special effects man, in which he would play around with the items in their workspaces, such as the breakable props.
Former sketches
- Assassination - Conan invites a guest who supposedly is privy to an upcoming, well-kept secret, who suffers a simulated death before he can reveal what he knows. For example, shortly before the final episode of SeinfeldSeinfeldSeinfeld is an American television sitcom that originally aired on NBC from July 5, 1989, to May 14, 1998, lasting nine seasons, and is now in syndication. It was created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld, the latter starring as a fictionalized version of himself...
, an actor appearing on the show began talking about what the final episode would be about; a few words in, an assassin shoots him in the chest. On another occasion, Conan introduced a man who claimed to be a high-ranking executive with Coca-ColaCoca-ColaCoca-Cola is a carbonated soft drink sold in stores, restaurants, and vending machines in more than 200 countries. It is produced by The Coca-Cola Company of Atlanta, Georgia, and is often referred to simply as Coke...
, who was going to discuss the soda's secret ingredients. As the interview started, the "executive" fell dead after getting hit by shurikenShurikenA shuriken is a traditional Japanese concealed weapon that was generally used for throwing, and sometimes stabbing or slashing...
, and a group of ninjaNinjaA or was a covert agent or mercenary of feudal Japan specializing in unorthodox arts of war. The functions of the ninja included espionage, sabotage, infiltration, and assassination, as well as open combat in certain situations...
s with the Coca-Cola logo on their backs were shown running away from the stage. These sketches have not appeared on the show for several years. - Awful Sports Chanter - In response to an upcoming sporting or other spectator event, Conan advises that you should keep chants short and easy to follow. As an example of what not to do, Andy BlitzAndy BlitzAndrew "Andy" Blitz is an American comedian and writer best known for his sketch comedy and writing work on the late-night talk show Late Night with Conan O’Brien, where he earned 7 Emmy nominations. Blitz was born in New York City, grew up in Ridgewood, New Jersey and graduated from Columbia...
is then shown in the show's audience, and begins a standard chant for that event while clapping each syllable (such as "Let's Go Mets!"). However, instead of repeating the line, he expands it into a very long chant that begins supportive and usually ends up as a narrative of some sort, occasionally asking the audience to chant along as if it's easy to follow. Conan interrupts the chant to go to commercial as Blitz continues to chant up to the break. - Car Chases - Conan explains that television shows' ratings go up when they cut to a car chase in action. He tells the audience that Late Night will begin doing this, however there are no car chases in Manhattan due to traffic congestion. So Late Night stages their own "car chases". While played as if they are real car chases, they are executed using Matchbox style vehicles, and model buildings in the hallways of the show's backstage area. The toy cars are pulled by fishing lineFishing lineA fishing line is a cord used or made for angling. Important parameters of a fishing line are its length, material, and weight...
as a camera gets a shot appearing to be from a helicopter. More recently, car chases have been shot when celebrities have encountered legal difficulties, including Michael JacksonMichael JacksonMichael Joseph Jackson was an American recording artist, entertainer, and businessman. Referred to as the King of Pop, or by his initials MJ, Jackson is recognized as the most successful entertainer of all time by Guinness World Records...
, Paris HiltonParis HiltonParis Whitney Hilton is an American businesswoman, heiress, and socialite. She is a great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton . Hilton is known for her controversial participation in a sex tape in 2003, and appearance on the television series The Simple Life alongside fellow socialite and childhood...
and O. J. SimpsonO. J. SimpsonOrenthal James "O. J." Simpson , nicknamed "The Juice", is a retired American collegiate and professional football player, football broadcaster, and actor...
. The sketch has not been seen since early 2008. - Conan O’Brien College Band Search - For a few years, Late Night held an annual college band search.
- Conan's Legs - Conan explains how the show is trying to reach out and collect more viewers by taking a page out of the Today Show handbook. He explains that many Americans tune in to the Today Show just to see Katie CouricKatie CouricKatherine Anne "Katie" Couric is an American journalist and author. She serves as Special Correspondent for ABC News, contributing to ABC World News, Nightline, 20/20, Good Morning America, This Week and primetime news specials...
's legs. The front of his desk is removed, revealing feminine legs. He continues by doing a few camera tricks such as moving his legs, bouncing a ball, and even shaving them. In actuality, the front of the desk is covered by a greenscreen substituted by a shot of a woman's legs recorded live offstage. The audience is presumed to understand the special effect, leading O'Brien to attempt to sync more complex actions with those of the offstage actress, or sometimes to intentionally fool her. The sketch stopped some time before Couric eventually left Today to anchor the CBS Evening NewsCBS Evening NewsCBS Evening News is the flagship nightly television news program of the American television network CBS. The network has broadcast this program since 1948, and has used the CBS Evening News title since 1963....
. - Continuity Errors - Conan and Andy review a recent broadcast for errors, discovering inconsistencies that no one seemed to have caught, such as Conan suddenly having a receding hairline or wearing a bib while eating a giant pie.
- Frankenstein Wastes A Minute of Our Time - FrankensteinFrankensteinFrankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus is a novel about a failed experiment that produced a monster, written by Mary Shelley, with inserts of poems by Percy Bysshe Shelley. Shelley started writing the story when she was eighteen, and the novel was published when she was twenty-one. The first...
's monster (played by writer Brian Stack) appears by one of the doors leading from the main set, acting excited about something, and inviting the cameraman (and the audience, vicariously) to come with him to take a look. He makes a long trek around the backstage area, stopping along the way to wave the cameraman to keep following. Invariably, what he finds is extremely mundane like a spatula, although it is usually near something that is considerably more interesting, and Conan assumes that is the item Frankenstein led the camera to. Frankenstein once found Tom HanksTom HanksThomas Jeffrey "Tom" Hanks is an American actor, producer, writer, and director. Hanks worked in television and family-friendly comedies, gaining wide notice in 1988's Big, before achieving success as a dramatic actor in several notable roles, including Andrew Beckett in Philadelphia, the title...
(who was not a guest on that night's episode) during the sketch, and pushed him out of the way to show off a light switch. (Hanks then immediately reentered the frame to join in pointing out the light switch with great enthusiasm.) The joke format is extremely similar to a shaggy dog story. Since NBC owns Universal, the Frankenstein monster looking like the one from the movies and sharing the same logo in the sketch title as Universal's monster is no coincidence; neither is the sketch also appearing shortly after the buy-out. While this sketch has seemingly been retired, Frankenstein continues to be a regular character. - The Hole In The Floor - There is a hole in the floor in front of Conan's desk. Conan throws objects through it and generally hassles an office worker below. The hole is created using bluescreen technology.
- Jerry Butters - Jerry Butters (played by Brian McCannBrian McCann (actor)Brian McCann is an American Emmy and WGA award-winning writer/actor/comedian best known for his sketch comedy work on the late night talk show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and more recently on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien and Conan.-Biography:McCann was born and raised in Wheaton,...
) is a talentless talk show host with his own early-morning show down the hall. His set is bland and reminiscent of a 1970s talk show with fake palms and dull brown colors. Jerry will interrupt Conan's show in the style of a suburban neighbor who initially wants to just have a friendly chat, but eventually needs a favor or some advice for a particular problem he is facing in his current show. Such problems in the past have included Abe Vigoda dying midway through an interview (after Jerry had asked him which was a better experience, his part in The GodfatherThe GodfatherThe Godfather is a 1972 American epic crime film directed by Francis Ford Coppola, based on the 1969 novel by Mario Puzo. With a screenplay by Puzo, Coppola and an uncredited Robert Towne, the film stars Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, James Caan, Robert Duvall, Sterling Hayden, John Marley, Richard...
or the children's comedy Good BurgerGood BurgerGood Burger is a 1997 American comedy film by Tollin/Robbins Productions and Nickelodeon Movies, released by Paramount Pictures, directed by Brian Robbins, and starring Kenan Thompson and Kel Mitchell...
). He also invariably promotes his own show by addressing Conan's audience with the line "It's on at four in the morning... so check it out!". - Krunk - During the first two seasons of the show, beginning in early 1994, O'Brien encouraged guests to insert the word krunk, a fictional expletive with multiple uses invented by the show's writers that "the censors don't quite know what to do with yet", into their conversations.
- Mick Ferguson, The Guy Who's Awfully Proud of his Bullet Proof Legs - long-time staff writer Brian McCann, in a mock-VaudevilleVaudevilleVaudeville was a theatrical genre of variety entertainment in the United States and Canada from the early 1880s until the early 1930s. Each performance was made up of a series of separate, unrelated acts grouped together on a common bill...
dance, sings "Oh I got bulletproof legs, I got bullet proof legs, oh ya can't hurt me cuz I have bullet proof legs! Oh they cost me a fortune but ya don't...." Invariably, a shadowy figure pulls out a gun and shoots him in the chest, which apparently is not bulletproof. In the second incarnation of it, the same man is standing on the screen and Mick implores Conan to get rid of him because he shot him before. Conan has a security guy come out and check the figure over stating that he does not have a weapon. Relieved Mick begins his song and dance again, only to have the Security guy pull out a gun and shoot him in the chest. Another incident has the security guard and a search dog guarding Mick. After Conan calms Mick's fears of the security guard by vouching for him, the search dog pulls a gun and shoots Mick in the chest. The camera then switches to Conan, who looks into it and says, "We're gonna get to the bottom of this." Discontinued due to complaints from gay rights advocates claiming that the sketch encouraged violence against gays. - The More You Know - These are spoofs of the famous NBC public service announcements. They were used frequently in earlier years, especially when Andy Richter was still Conan's sidekick. These sketches would begin seemingly innocently, but would quickly devolve into parody, usually involving dark themes. For example, in one such sketch, Max Weinberg commands: "Sometimes condoms break; deal with it, missy!"
- Staring Contest - A famous skit held while Andy Richter still served as O'Brien's sidekick. An homage to the game show Make Me LaughMake Me LaughMake Me Laugh was an American game show in which contestants watched three stand-up comedians performing their acts, one at a time, earning one dollar for every second that they could make it through without laughing. Each comedian got sixty seconds to try to crack the contestant up...
, Richter (unlike O'Brien) would be subjected to a series of purely physical-comedy skits taking place behind O'Brien, usually insulting and disgusting, which would eventually force Richter to look away. On the last episode Richter served as sidekick, the show subjected O'Brien to the skits instead; this was the only time Richter ever won the staring contest. The two tied after one competition in which, as a distraction, Albert EinsteinAlbert EinsteinAlbert Einstein was a German-born theoretical physicist who developed the theory of general relativity, effecting a revolution in physics. For this achievement, Einstein is often regarded as the father of modern physics and one of the most prolific intellects in human history...
was inspired by a large-breasted woman in a bikini to add the "squared" to his theory of special relativitySpecial relativitySpecial relativity is the physical theory of measurement in an inertial frame of reference proposed in 1905 by Albert Einstein in the paper "On the Electrodynamics of Moving Bodies".It generalizes Galileo's...
, and Andy and Conan joined them in a celebratory dance. - Tomorry the Ostrich - During the break between the first and second guest, Tomorry the ostrich would come out to deliver the blue card with a list of tomorrow night's guests. Tomorry would lay an egg containing the card. Tomorry was a large ostrich with a long, solid neck that members of the audience often pulled on as Tomorry passed by.
- Nobody's Watching - This is a series of sketches that ran over the course of a week or two during the summer of the early years of the 2000s. NBC still had the rights to the NBA Finals which would air during primetime hours and subsequetnly push back the late night programming depeneding on how long the games ran. On some occasions, Late Night would air as late as an hour after it is normal time. In these cases, Conan would explain to the audience that it was currently 2 A.M. or later, keeping with the running joke that his show was live and not recorded earlier in the day, and therefore, "nobody's watching." The host would use this an excuse to show low-budget commercials of spoof products that were supposedly sponsors or local businesses. No longer continued.
- Conan of the Night - Seen limitedly in the early part of the 2000s these sketches began with Conan putting on a fake mustache, using a cheesy Spanish accent, and playing out a film noire-style sketch in which a murder was inverstigated or caused. One such sketch ended with the mustachioed Conan "throwing" a knife into Max's chest.
Monologue digressions
- Awkward Throws to Max Weinberg - Conan usually begins his monologue by saying "We've got a good show tonight, isn't that right Max?" to which Max replies in an intentionally nonchalant tone, "Yeah", then usually shrugs. One such awkward throw started with Max saying, "Mmm-hmmmm" in a satisfied matter, prompting Conan to blurt out, "I didn't ask, 'How's the rice, Uncle Ben?'!"
- "Donald Trump Impression" - Conan's impression of Donald Trump has him tugging on his hair, sucking his cheeks in, using Trump's catch phraseCatch phraseA catchphrase is a phrase or expression recognized by its repeated utterance. Such phrases often originate in popular culture and in the arts, and typically spread through a variety of mass media , as well as word of mouth...
, "You're fired!" and performing Trump's python hand move as The Max Weinberg 7 plays the intro to The O'JaysThe O'JaysThe O'Jays are an American R&B group from Canton, Ohio, formed in 1963 and originally consisting of Eddie Levert , Walter Williams , William Powell , Bobby Massey and Bill Isles. The O'Jays were inducted into the Vocal Group Hall of Fame in 2004, and The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2005...
' "For the Love of MoneyFor the Love of Money"For the Love of Money" is a soul/funk song written by Kenneth Gamble, Leon Huff, and Anthony Jackson; and recorded by Philadelphia soul group The O'Jays for the album Ship Ahoy. Produced by Gamble and Huff for Philadelphia International Records, "For the Love of Money" was issued as a single in...
", which is used as the theme song to Trump's NBC show The ApprenticeThe Apprentice (U.S. TV series)The Apprentice is an American reality television show hosted by real estate magnate, businessman and television personality Donald Trump, created by Mark Burnett and broadcast on NBC...
. This bit is usually performed any time that Trump is mentioned, whether in the monologue or in interviews or comedy sketches. Conan has performed this bit with Donald Trump himself present in the studio on more than one occasion. - Eating a Tear - Conan sometimes will say something that will cause him to shed, and then eat, a tear. This is pantomimed by running a finger from his eye down his cheek to his mouth.
- "I'm-a Gonna Go to Hell When I Die" - a rousing gospel-styledGospel musicGospel music is music that is written to express either personal, spiritual or a communal belief regarding Christian life, as well as to give a Christian alternative to mainstream secular music....
song, started on November 12, 2004, that has no lyrics other than its title and is always accompanied by a rhythmic clapping beat. The audience will usually start clapping along, causing Conan to exclaim, "Don't clap along to that, that's terrible!" Occasionally, Conan has recycled the tune with a new title/lyric, notably "I Had an Unhappy Childhood and You Have to Pay". This is often sung by Conan after the audience finds one of his jokes distasteful, many times when referring to Star JonesStar JonesStar Jones is an American lawyer, journalist, writer, and television personality. She is known for her role as a co-host of the ABC weekday morning talk show The View...
. Another variation, sung in a different tune, is "I'll Be Beaten to Death When I Leave Tonight". - The Shark Attack - Conan leaves the screen, crouches down just enough and walks past the camera so that only his red pompadourPompadour (hairstyle)Pompadour is a tall style of men's haircut which takes its name from Madame de Pompadour.There are Latin variants of the hair style more associated with European and Argentine tango fashion trends and occasionally with late 20th century musical genres such as rockabilly and country.The pompadour...
is visible. - International Symbol for Larry King - Conan pretends to pull suspenders away from his body, then makes spectacles with his thumbs and forefingers. He then explains that this is the International Symbol for Larry King, comparing it to the equivalent for choking.
- "Keep cool, my babies!" - Often spoken immediately before his monologue as a response to thunderous applause, Conan will utter this phrase in order to calm his excited audience. "Keep cool, my babies!" is often followed by "The String Dance" (see entry below).
- "The Late Night Cat" - Conan jumps out of the frame and disappears (with a whooshing sound, as in Miscellaneous Pantomiming below) for a few seconds before reappearing extremely close to the camera, out of focus, and hissing at it in a feline manner (complete with "claws" extended). This usually occurs when the studio audience dislikes a joke told in the monologue.
- Smoothing the Eyebrows - Conan quickly licks the tips of the index and pinkie fingers of one hand, and uses them simultaneously to smooth his eyebrows.
- I love you too, sir - If an audience member screams something (often admirable) at Conan, he makes a joke such as, "I love you too, sir" or "It's nice of my dad for coming."
- Making fun of LaBamba - Conan sometimes looks over toward band member Richie "LaBamba" Rosenberg when there is a homosexual or unsavory reference in the monologue. LaBamba usually reacts by staring back at Conan with a bemused, disappointed, or "deflated" look on his face and/or shaking his head. Conan usually proceeds to explain that LaBamba would not be surprised by the reference if he would just attend the rehearsal.
- Miscellaneous Pantomiming - Conan will duck in and out of frame, while making a whooshing sound.
- "Making Fun of Products" - Conan will mock a certain product or brand. He then asks the producer if said brand is a sponsor. The producer answers "yes" before Conan lets off an uncomfortable laugh.
- "Nerd Impression" - When nerds are mentioned in Conan's monologue (such as in the context of "Star WarsStar WarsStar Wars is an American epic space opera film series created by George Lucas. The first film in the series was originally released on May 25, 1977, under the title Star Wars, by 20th Century Fox, and became a worldwide pop culture phenomenon, followed by two sequels, released at three-year...
/Star TrekStar TrekStar Trek is an American science fiction entertainment franchise created by Gene Roddenberry. The core of Star Trek is its six television series: The Original Series, The Animated Series, The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, Voyager, and Enterprise...
/The Lord of the RingsThe Lord of the RingsThe Lord of the Rings is a high fantasy epic written by English philologist and University of Oxford professor J. R. R. Tolkien. The story began as a sequel to Tolkien's earlier, less complex children's fantasy novel The Hobbit , but eventually developed into a much larger work. It was written in...
/The Matrix nerds"), he sometimes alters his voice to sound like a "nerd" criticizing Conan for that joke. This usually involves pushing his "glasses" up the bridge of his nose, wagging his finger, bucking his teeth, waving an invisible lightsaber, using sci-fi related quotes, or saying something like, "How dare you", or "I'll get you, Conan O'Brien!" and pushing the buttons on an invisible calculator. On Tonight, he has added turnings of a Rubik's cubeRubik's CubeRubik's Cube is a 3-D mechanical puzzle invented in 1974 by Hungarian sculptor and professor of architecture Ernő Rubik.Originally called the "Magic Cube", the puzzle was licensed by Rubik to be sold by Ideal Toy Corp. in 1980 and won the German Game of the Year special award for Best Puzzle that...
. Coinciding with the release of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood PrinceHarry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (film)Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is a 2009 fantasy film directed by David Yates and based on the novel of the same name by J. K. Rowling. It is the sixth instalment in the Harry Potter film series, written by Steve Kloves and produced by David Heyman and David Barron...
in theaters, Conan has placed an invisible sorcerer's hat on his head and drawn the lightning bolt on his forehead (as if he were Harry PotterHarry PotterHarry Potter is a series of seven fantasy novels written by the British author J. K. Rowling. The books chronicle the adventures of the adolescent wizard Harry Potter and his best friends Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, all of whom are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry...
), then waves an invisible wand while saying in his nerd voice, "I strike at thee!" - "The String Dance" - Conan mimes attaching strings to his hips and pulls them, shaking his hips back and forth until he "cuts" one of the strings, dropping the "attached" hip. The string dance is customarily performed before the monologueMonologueIn theatre, a monologue is a speech presented by a single character, most often to express their thoughts aloud, though sometimes also to directly address another character or the audience. Monologues are common across the range of dramatic media...
during the audience applause, or during the monologueMonologueIn theatre, a monologue is a speech presented by a single character, most often to express their thoughts aloud, though sometimes also to directly address another character or the audience. Monologues are common across the range of dramatic media...
, but Conan has also performed the dance at the request of guests. Jim CarreyJim CarreyJames Eugene "Jim" Carrey is a Canadian-American actor and comedian. He has received two Golden Globe Awards and has also been nominated on four occasions. Carrey began comedy in 1979, performing at Yuk Yuk's in Toronto, Ontario...
also chose to perform his own version of the string dance on his appearance in December 2005. Justin TimberlakeJustin TimberlakeJustin Randall Timberlake is an American pop musician and actor. He achieved early fame when he appeared as a contestant on Star Search, and went on to star in the Disney Channel television series The New Mickey Mouse Club, where he met future bandmate JC Chasez...
, Ice-TICE-T* Ice-T, an American rapper and actor* ICE T , a tilting model of the German InterCityExpress series of high-speed trains...
, MC HammerMC HammerStanley Kirk Burrell , better known by his stage name MC Hammer , is an American rapper, entertainer, business entrepreneur, dancer and actor. He had his greatest commercial success and popularity from the late 1980s until the mid-1990s...
, The Rock, Paula AbdulPaula AbdulPaula Julie Abdul is an American singer-songwriter, dancer, choreographer, actress and television personality.In the 1980s, Abdul rose from cheerleader for the Los Angeles Lakers to highly sought-after choreographer at the height of the music video era before scoring a string of pop music-R&B hits...
, UsherUsher (entertainer)Usher Terry Raymond IV , who performs under the mononym Usher, is an American singer-songwriter, and actor. He is considered around the world to be the reigning King of R&B. Usher rose to fame in the late 1990s with the release of his second album My Way, which spawned his first Billboard Hot 100...
, Matt Bluhm, John TeshJohn TeshJohn Frank Tesh is an American pianist and composer of pop music, as well as a radio host and television presenter. His 10-year-old 'Intelligence for Your Life Radio Show' reaches 14.2 Million listeners/week, and is syndicated by Teshmedia on 400 stations in US, Canada, and the UK...
, and Christina ApplegateChristina ApplegateChristina Applegate is an American actress. She is best known for playing Kelly Bundy on the Fox sitcom Married... with Children. Since then, she has established a film and television career, winning a Primetime Emmy and earning Tony and Golden Globe nominations...
have also performed the dance. Houston TexansHouston TexansThe Houston Texans are a professional American football team based in Houston, Texas. The team is currently a member of the Southern Division of the American Football Conference in the National Football League...
wide receiver David Anderson performed it as a touchdown celebration during the 2008 season. In the epilogue of the February 12, 2009 episode of Comedy CentralComedy CentralComedy Central is an American cable television and satellite television channel that carries comedy programming, both original and syndicated....
's The Colbert Report, host Stephen ColbertStephen Colbert (character)The Reverend / Sir / Dr. / Stephen T. Colbert, D.F.A., brain-child of Google, is the persona of political satirist Stephen Colbert, as portrayed on Comedy Central's The Colbert Report. Described as a "well-intentioned, poorly informed high-status idiot", the character is a self-obsessed right-wing...
"stole" Conan's strings in retribution for Conan's departure from New York to Los Angeles. As "ransom" for the strings, Colbert demanded Conan's return to New York. On February 18, 2009 Conan's opening monologue expressed disdain over Colbert's theft of the string dance and openly challenged him to the rights of the dance. Colbert then emerged from backstage to the surprise of the audience. The audience responded with a mix of ecstatic cheering and mock jeering for Colbert and encouraged a string dance-off. Colbert "won" by "tying" string around Conan. - Unusual Audience Reactions - Conan is always amused by, and makes fun of, the unusual reactions of his audience to some of his monologue jokes. The most common reaction is a horrified/angry "booing", morphing into "polite laughter and applause", which Conan admits is his favorite reaction. Another audience reaction is delayed laughter to a punchline, sometimes sparking Conan's "Delayed reaction always creeps me out" song, in the style of "I'm-a Gonna Go to Hell When I Die".
- Anna Nicole Smith Impression - Conan imitates her nonsensical mutterings, drug-induced wandering, and outbursts. He will wander back and forth in front of the camera, muttering, and finally jumps out with the "cat hiss", also seen in the Late Night Cat digression. Not seen since her death.
- Geraldo Rivera Impression - When there's a news story or any reference to news personality Geraldo Rivera, Conan often places his index finger across his upper lip, denoting a mustache.
- Tom Selleck Impression - Similar to the Geraldo Rivera impression except Conan places two fingers across his upper lip to convey a thicker mustache.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger Impression - When a topic comes up referring to the actor, Conan will often put on an Arnold Schwarzenegger accent, speak in a pseudo-Germanic language, pretend to eat a giant sausage (Conan claims he "likes his Arnold to be eating a sausage at the end") while flexing his muscles and giving a "death-stare" to the audience.
- George W. Bush Impression - When there's a news story or any reference to President George W. Bush, Conan will often look away from the camera, as if distracted by something, then look straight back at the camera with a confused look on his face, exclaiming "Huh?"
- Congress/Parliament applause - If one of his jokes gets lukewarm applause, Conan will liken it to members of Congress or Parliament clapping along. He'll also say "Yes, very good, O'Brien", or something to that effect, in a somewhat aristocratic tone.
- U.S.A. Chant - Most usually done when he has redeemed an obviously bad joke with a good one, Conan sometimes celebrates by beginning a chant of "U.S.A! U.S.A!" As soon as the audience joins in, Conan immediately stops and stares at them.
- Rhetorical Set-Up Questions - Conan frequently introduces a monologue joke by asking a rhetorical question about whether or not the audience has heard of a certain event; he then gives them no time to respond, and criticizes them for being uninformed.
- Producer Impression - Often, when Conan says something especially odd or stupid, he will say that the producer is looking at him and then imitates the producer with a serious tone and expression, often crossing his arms, then poking fun at his impression's similarity to Jackie MasonJackie MasonJackie Mason is an American stand-up comedian and movie actor.-Early life:Born Yacov Moshe Maza in Sheboygan, Wisconsin, he grew up on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, New York City....
.
Miscellaneous
- The Growl - Conan often gives a Bob HopeBob HopeBob Hope, KBE, KCSG, KSS was a British-born American comedian and actor who appeared in vaudeville, on Broadway, and in radio, television and movies. He was also noted for his work with the US Armed Forces and his numerous USO shows entertaining American military personnel...
- or Roy OrbisonRoy OrbisonRoy Kelton Orbison was an American singer-songwriter, well known for his distinctive, powerful voice, complex compositions, and dark emotional ballads. Orbison grew up in Texas and began singing in a rockabilly/country & western band in high school until he was signed by Sun Records in Memphis...
-like growl at attractive women, sometimes accompanied by barking or meows and hisses while miming a "clawing" motion. - The Microphone - Conan will sometimes knock over the microphone on his desk for a quick laugh. Once in a while, he will knock it over and then jokingly threaten the audience, such as "I'll clear this studio if I have to", and "...fill it with a minty foam." He also states on occasion that the microphone is made of chocolate or marzipan. He also has been known to put the desk microphone up to his face and breathe heavily into it while staring wide-eyed. Occasionally, he will take his clip-on microphone and stick it up his nose "just because the producer hates it".
- The Conan/Max staredown - Similar to the Small Talk moment, but without any dialogue, Conan and Max will stare at each other blankly for a long time with the cameras switching between Conan and Max. Eventually, Conan seems to get creeped out and looks away. He then says that someone should discover a way to "bottle that chemistry."
- Conan Cost Cutting - After a sketch involving Tim Harrod in an expensive "Grub Man" costume, the show began to re-use the costume in order to amortize the cost. It appeared as a "surrendering croissantCroissantA croissant is a buttery flaky pastry named for its distinctive crescent shape. It is also sometimes called a crescent, from the French word for "crescent". Croissants are made of a leavened variant of puff pastry...
", a "victorious cannoliCannoliCannoli are Sicilian pastry desserts. The singular is cannolo , meaning "little tube", with the etymology stemming from the Latin "canna", or reed. Cannoli originated in Sicily and are an essential part of Sicilian cuisine...
", a "liposuctionLiposuctionLiposuction, also known as lipoplasty , liposculpture suction lipectomy or simply lipo is a cosmetic surgery operation that removes fat from many different sites on the human body...
ed Jabba the HuttJabba the HuttJabba the Hutt is a fictional character in George Lucas's space opera film saga Star Wars. Designed as a large, slug-like alien, his appearance has been described by film critic Roger Ebert as "Dickensian," a cross between a toad and the Cheshire Cat....
", a "pissed off kreplachKreplachKreplach are small dumplings filled with ground meat, mashed potatoes or another filling, usually boiled and served in chicken soup. They are similar to Italian tortellini and Chinese wontons. The dough is traditionally made of flour, water and eggs, kneaded and rolled out thin...
", and a "beach rock." At the end of any sketch involving the costume, Conan mentions how many different ways the costume has been used and a "per costume total", which is the cost of the original costume divided by the number of uses. He'll then invite viewers to mail in their suggestions for a further use for the costume and, in return, will receive an "I'm a Conan Cost Cutter" button. - The address for viewers to send in their own suggestions for use of the Grub-Man costume was:
-
- Grub-Man Costume Ideas c/o Late Night
- 30 Rockefeller Plaza
- New York, NY 10112
- A variation on this bit was used when the show acquired an expensive whale costume for a single sketch, and then devoted an entire "Whale Week" to whale-related bits, ostensibly to get their money's worth from the costume. The whale costume in question has been used with decreasing frequency since.
- Mike Koman - Koman, one of the show's writers, often plays a sketch character. Whenever he does, Conan is guaranteed to needle him in some way, as when he was the "M.I.T. Nerd" or "Donald Trump's Brother".
- The Evil Puppy - This bit involves a puppy, often a golden retrieverGolden RetrieverThe Golden Retriever is a medium-sized breed of dog. They were historically developed as gundogs to retrieve shot waterfowl such as ducks and upland game birds during hunting and shooting parties. As such, they were bred to have a soft mouth to retrieve game undamaged and have an instinctive love...
, sitting on a throne of skulls, flanked by black-robed Druids, all of this under a red light, while O FortunaO Fortuna"O Fortuna" is a medieval Latin Goliardic poem written early in the thirteenth century, part of the collection known as the Carmina Burana. It is a complaint about fate, and Fortuna, a goddess in Roman mythology and personification of luck....
plays in the background. Often, as the camera shows close-ups of the puppy squirming around on the chair, the audience will "awwww" at its cuteness, as Conan warns that the puppy is going to "conquer the world" or "suck your liver out through your eye sockets." Usually appears on Friday the 13th. Sometimes, the Evil Puppy's powers are portrayed causing pain and humiliation through supernatural means. - Jeff Won't Talk - Conan pokes fun at the show producer, Jeff, who is only ever seen shaking his head on camera and gesturing for Conan to move it along.
- Faulty G.E. In-house Voice Directory System - Conan reveals the company's voice-operated directory's voice recognition system, powered by General ElectricGeneral ElectricGeneral Electric Company , or GE, is an American multinational conglomerate corporation incorporated in Schenectady, New York and headquartered in Fairfield, Connecticut, United States...
, "doesn't work." Here, Conan will request the name of a person he wants to be directed to. However, the system brings up only a similar sounding name or a totally different name, after a prolonged pause. He also uses song verses and random sentences for hilarious results. - The Gentler Side of Grand Theft Auto IVGrand Theft Auto IVGrand Theft Auto IV is a 2008 open world action video game published by Rockstar Games, and developed by British games developer Rockstar North. It has been released for the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 video game consoles, and for the Windows operating system...
- Since the release of the highly anticipated video game Grand Theft Auto IVGrand Theft Auto IVGrand Theft Auto IV is a 2008 open world action video game published by Rockstar Games, and developed by British games developer Rockstar North. It has been released for the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 video game consoles, and for the Windows operating system...
, Conan has presented in-game footage of the game that do not display any acts of violence or sexuality. Typically, the player-controlled protagonist Niko Bellic would proclaim random things about himself and society in a friendly, humorous way, as opposed to the game's actual extremely graphic nature. - Ginger, NO! - A fake interview is set up with a staff member when all of a sudden Conan says "Ginger, NO!" The camera then cuts to a German Shepherd who raises a handgun and shoots the interviewee.
- Late Night Sausage Party - On nights when all of the guests are male, Conan complains about the new movie "The Women", and how there are no men in the movie—not even extras! He counters this by having all male guests and a gravelly voiced announcer begins the "sausage party" by announcing the guests and making crass and inappropriate remarks regarding their sausagePenisThe penis is a biological feature of male animals including both vertebrates and invertebrates...
s. - Double Letter Week - A whole week of episodes was scheduled in which the guests had double letters in their names. (i.e. Ted KoppelTed KoppelEdward James "Ted" Koppel is an English-born American broadcast journalist, best known as the anchor for Nightline from the program's inception in 1980 until his retirement in late 2005. After leaving Nightline, Koppel worked as managing editor for the Discovery Channel before resigning in 2008...
, Larry KingLarry KingLawrence Harvey "Larry" King is an American television and radio host whose work has been recognized with awards including two Peabodys and ten Cable ACE Awards....
). (Max once reacted with disappointment, saying that he wished he had a double letter in his name, to which Conan responded, "Oh, but you do, Max." Max was then subjected to the Ass Stamp, with the double letter in 'ASS' highlighted.) - This Show Will Not Air - Conan does something very outrageous or over the line, but reassures the audience by saying that "This show will never air."
- Hold for Editing - When a joke bombs Conan will sometimes pause for a few seconds and say, "Hold for editing." He will then resume the monologue or sketch as if the section containing the bad joke will be removed from the show before it is broadcast.
- Conan's Ford TaurusSecond-generation Ford TaurusThe second-generation Ford Taurus is an automobile produced by the Ford Motor Company from 1992 to 1995, which served as the second out of six generations of the Ford Taurus....
- On several occasions, Conan had expressed pride in his car, a green 1992 Ford Taurus SHOFord Taurus SHOThe Ford Taurus SHO is a full-size performance sedan based on the Ford Taurus that was originally produced by the Ford Motor Company from 1989 until 1999. It returned in 2009 for the 2010 model year....
. He actively sought to sell it and went so far as to have it appraised at Sotheby'sSotheby'sSotheby's is the world's fourth oldest auction house in continuous operation.-History:The oldest auction house in operation is the Stockholms Auktionsverk founded in 1674, the second oldest is Göteborgs Auktionsverk founded in 1681 and third oldest being founded in 1731, all Swedish...
and Christie'sChristie'sChristie's is an art business and a fine arts auction house.- History :The official company literature states that founder James Christie conducted the first sale in London, England, on 5 December 1766, and the earliest auction catalogue the company retains is from December 1766...
auction houses despite being extremely dirty and having mechanical problems. The car was finally "sold" to actor Brad PittBrad PittWilliam Bradley "Brad" Pitt is an American actor and film producer. Pitt has received two Academy Award nominations and four Golden Globe Award nominations, winning one...
during one of the final shows, however a sketch during his debut on The Tonight ShowThe Tonight Show with Conan O'BrienThe Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien is an American late-night talk show that featured Conan O'Brien as host from June 1, 2009 to January 22, 2010 as part of NBC's long-running Tonight Show franchise...
revealed that he still owned the car. - The Show Is Cheap/ NBC Has No Money - Conan frequently made jokes commenting about the show being cheap, especially during sketches where bad special effects or shoddy-looking costumes/ graphics were obvious. Often he would also make references to how NBC did not want to pay for anything.
- "That was stupid." - Much like the "This show is cheap" comments, whenever there was an especially bizarre sketch or a bad joke, Conan usually commented about how dumb or stupid it was before moving on.
- "Gotta go, move it along." - If a joke/ sketch ran especially long or if Conan was wasting too much time he would often mock his producer by saying "Gotta go, move it along!" in a deep voice.