Holy (Bottom episode)
Encyclopedia
Holy is the fifth episode of the second series of British
television
sitcom, Bottom
. It was first broadcast on October 29, 1992.
once again, and Richie and Eddie experience a Christmas miracle
.
When Eddie awakens at 3:30am to hear Deck the Halls blaring from an ageing tape recorder, it means only one thing - Christmas morning in Hammersmith
, and Richie has disguise himself as Father Christmas
. Eddie has prepared for the early wake up and has left a complex trap that leaves 'Santa' suspended by the neck from the ceiling - Eddie (who is not even remotely fooled by Richie's disguise) only agrees to cut him loose after he pays £10.
A bruised and battered 'Santa' makes his exit, with Richie appearing mere seconds later. Ignoring Eddie's protests that he should return to bed, Richie proceeds to open his presents, remarking that he has a huge pair of tights full of gifts while Eddie has an empty small child's sock. Richie's gifts, however, are revealed to be individually wrapped ingredients for the Christmas dinner for which Richie insists on keeping track of for Father Christmas's 'thank you' letter.
Turning to their 'big ones', Richie is frustrated by Eddie's excuse "It's the thought that counts" (replying "No it's not, it's the size that counts!") that his present is small - unwrapped to reveal an empty miniature bottle of Malibu
. However, Eddie has a second present prepared for Richie: A play-telescope with a picture of Sue Carpenter
in a bikini mouthing the poorly written words "Fick erf you sad path-tic winker".
Richie's present for Eddie is far larger - an enormous, if rather cartoonish, self-portrait. Richie mistakes Eddie's disparaging remarks about the painting, believing he is being compared with some ancient master. Eddie uses Richie holding the painting high up to find the right spot for it... ultimately by smashing it over Richie's head.
After Richie insists (largely by removing the flex and causing the sets electrical wiring to burn out) that no one watches the television until the Queen's Speech
(unless there is a Bond
film on, obviously), they divide the labour up so that Richie is responsible for doing the cooking (It would appear that neither of the flatmates are looking forward to Brussels sprout
s, but they must have them since it is Christmas) while Eddie must decorate the flat to make it 'all Christmassy'.
After Richie discovers that Eddie has drunk all the brandy, thus making it impossible to make brandy butter, Eddie produces from the fridge a flame-sustaining substitute: Vodka
margarine - spiced up with a couple of cans of hair-spray.
Unfortunately for Richie, a kitchen accident ensues as he chops off his right index finger. Unable now to ring for an ambulance, Eddie comes to Richie's rescue, applying a tight tourniquet
(namely his hands around Richie's neck) to restrict the flow of blood. On finding Richie's finger on the floor, he jokes with it for a moment before Richie snatches it back, replacing it on his hand and finding that it still works. After discussing the virtues of Eddie's sewing skills, Richie instead allows Eddie to staple
his finger back into place.
After Eddie unveils his Christmas 'twig', adorned in large mains light-bulbs, which promptly catches fire when he tries to light it, a brief fight ensues, interrupted by the arrival of their guests: Dave Hedgehog and Spudgun. Richie insists the group all drink a sherry-glass of gravy (Spudgun protesting heavily) before they take their seats for Christmas lunch.
Richie's culinary skills alas have deserted him - the potatoes have hardened to the point they can smash plates, and following a bout of bird-related innuendos he finds that the turkey has shrivelled to a smouldering lump of charcoal. Christmas pudding follows, only for Eddie's vodka margarine to prove overly good at sustaining a flame, resulting in an extinguisher-foam covered table.
After the failed dinner, the men withdraw to the drawing-room, with Spudgun, Eddie and Hedgehog each donning paper crown hats from Christmas crackers, while Richie attempts to drum-up support for his Christmas charades
game. An increasingly irritable Eddie puts a stop to this, demanding they each just have Goldfinger
and pack it in.
Richie is drawn away by the ringing doorbell, annoyed that it may be charity collectors, only to discover a baby has been left on their doorstep. Introducing it to the others, Eddie is immediately offended, insisting Richie get rid of it, worried it would come between them, and commenting that he should have been more careful. The baby begins to cry and Richie places the cot on the table in front of them, covering his face with a towel to play peekaboo
to quieten the child.
Sad that this newborn child has no home and no presents on his first Christmas Day, Spudgun decides to donate his box of Terry's
All Gold chocolates to the infant. Eddie succumbs to guilt, too, giving the boy his Frankenstein's monster
mask, while Hedgehog is compelled to give his bottle of aftershave
- a new brand called Grrrr. Richie increasingly notices a pattern, finally realizing: "Gold, Frankenstein and Grrrr... and you're all wearing crowns
! And I'm a virgin!" His blue "headscarf" clinches it for him, and he becomes convinced he is the new virgin mother of God
.
Spudgun volunteers to change the baby's nappy whilst Hedgehog attempts to phone the Pope - surprised to find from the phone book that the Pope
lives in Twickenham
. Eddie, meanwhile, refuses to allow the arrival of the son of God to spoil his Christmas, and indulges in plenty of booze. Whilst Richie is rebuking him for this shameful act, the boys' landlord, Mr. Harrison bursts in.
Harrison reveals to a genuinely saddened Richie that the baby boy is merely his grandson, left in a hurry because his mother-in-law had had a heart attack, and he is soon followed by his daughter. Richie and Eddie soon perk up, though, when she asks if she may breast-feed young Master Bates in their kitchen... Eddie and Richie look at her breast-feeding then themselves and shout "MERRY BLOODY CHRISTMAS!!"
United Kingdom
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern IrelandIn the United Kingdom and Dependencies, other languages have been officially recognised as legitimate autochthonous languages under the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages...
television
Television
Television is a telecommunication medium for transmitting and receiving moving images that can be monochrome or colored, with accompanying sound...
sitcom, Bottom
Bottom (TV series)
Bottom was a British sitcom television series that originally aired on BBC2 between 1991 and 1995. It was written by comic duo Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson who star as Richie and Eddie, two flatmates living on the dole in Hammersmith, London...
. It was first broadcast on October 29, 1992.
Synopsis
It's Christmas time in HammersmithHammersmith
Hammersmith is an urban centre in the London Borough of Hammersmith and Fulham in west London, England, in the United Kingdom, approximately five miles west of Charing Cross on the north bank of the River Thames...
once again, and Richie and Eddie experience a Christmas miracle
Miracle
A miracle often denotes an event attributed to divine intervention. Alternatively, it may be an event attributed to a miracle worker, saint, or religious leader. A miracle is sometimes thought of as a perceptible interruption of the laws of nature. Others suggest that a god may work with the laws...
.
Plot
Note: There are now two different common versions of this episode - the original broadcast version and the extended version that appears on the series 2 DVD in some regions. Sections that appear only in the extended edition are noted in italics.When Eddie awakens at 3:30am to hear Deck the Halls blaring from an ageing tape recorder, it means only one thing - Christmas morning in Hammersmith
Hammersmith
Hammersmith is an urban centre in the London Borough of Hammersmith and Fulham in west London, England, in the United Kingdom, approximately five miles west of Charing Cross on the north bank of the River Thames...
, and Richie has disguise himself as Father Christmas
Father Christmas
Father Christmas is the name used in many English-speaking countries for a figure associated with Christmas. A similar figure with the same name exists in several other countries, including France , Spain , Brazil , Portugal , Italy , Armenia , India...
. Eddie has prepared for the early wake up and has left a complex trap that leaves 'Santa' suspended by the neck from the ceiling - Eddie (who is not even remotely fooled by Richie's disguise) only agrees to cut him loose after he pays £10.
A bruised and battered 'Santa' makes his exit, with Richie appearing mere seconds later. Ignoring Eddie's protests that he should return to bed, Richie proceeds to open his presents, remarking that he has a huge pair of tights full of gifts while Eddie has an empty small child's sock. Richie's gifts, however, are revealed to be individually wrapped ingredients for the Christmas dinner for which Richie insists on keeping track of for Father Christmas's 'thank you' letter.
Turning to their 'big ones', Richie is frustrated by Eddie's excuse "It's the thought that counts" (replying "No it's not, it's the size that counts!") that his present is small - unwrapped to reveal an empty miniature bottle of Malibu
Malibu Rum
Malibu Rum is a flavored rum made with natural coconut extract, possessing an alcohol content by volume of 21.0% . The brand is owned by Pernod Ricard and it is made in Canada.-History:...
. However, Eddie has a second present prepared for Richie: A play-telescope with a picture of Sue Carpenter
London Plus
London Plus was the name of the BBC's regional news programme for southeastern England. Launched in 1984, the programme represented the BBC's attempt to boost regional news service for the South East...
in a bikini mouthing the poorly written words "Fick erf you sad path-tic winker".
Richie's present for Eddie is far larger - an enormous, if rather cartoonish, self-portrait. Richie mistakes Eddie's disparaging remarks about the painting, believing he is being compared with some ancient master. Eddie uses Richie holding the painting high up to find the right spot for it... ultimately by smashing it over Richie's head.
After Richie insists (largely by removing the flex and causing the sets electrical wiring to burn out) that no one watches the television until the Queen's Speech
Royal Christmas Message
The Queen's Christmas Message is a broadcast made by the sovereign of the Commonwealth realms to the Commonwealth of Nations each Christmas. The tradition began in 1932 with a radio broadcast by George V on the British Broadcasting Corporation Empire Service...
(unless there is a Bond
James Bond
James Bond, code name 007, is a fictional character created in 1953 by writer Ian Fleming, who featured him in twelve novels and two short story collections. There have been a six other authors who wrote authorised Bond novels or novelizations after Fleming's death in 1964: Kingsley Amis,...
film on, obviously), they divide the labour up so that Richie is responsible for doing the cooking (It would appear that neither of the flatmates are looking forward to Brussels sprout
Brussels sprout
The Brussels sprout is a cultivar of wild cabbage grown for its edible buds. The leafy green vegetables are typically 2.5–4 cm in diameter and look like miniature cabbages. The sprout is Brassica oleracea, in the "gemmifera" group of the family Brassicaceae...
s, but they must have them since it is Christmas) while Eddie must decorate the flat to make it 'all Christmassy'.
After Richie discovers that Eddie has drunk all the brandy, thus making it impossible to make brandy butter, Eddie produces from the fridge a flame-sustaining substitute: Vodka
Vodka
Vodka , is a distilled beverage. It is composed primarily of water and ethanol with traces of impurities and flavorings. Vodka is made by the distillation of fermented substances such as grains, potatoes, or sometimes fruits....
margarine - spiced up with a couple of cans of hair-spray.
Unfortunately for Richie, a kitchen accident ensues as he chops off his right index finger. Unable now to ring for an ambulance, Eddie comes to Richie's rescue, applying a tight tourniquet
Tourniquet
An emergency tourniquet is a tightly tied band applied around a body part sometimes used in an attempt to stop severe traumatic bleeding. Tourniquets are also used during venipuncture and other medical procedures. Severe bleeding means the loss of more than 1,000 ml of blood. This flow of blood...
(namely his hands around Richie's neck) to restrict the flow of blood. On finding Richie's finger on the floor, he jokes with it for a moment before Richie snatches it back, replacing it on his hand and finding that it still works. After discussing the virtues of Eddie's sewing skills, Richie instead allows Eddie to staple
Staple (fastener)
A staple is a type of two-pronged fastener, usually metal, used for joining or binding materials together. Large staples might be used with a hammer or staple gun for masonry, roofing, corrugated boxes and other heavy-duty uses...
his finger back into place.
After Eddie unveils his Christmas 'twig', adorned in large mains light-bulbs, which promptly catches fire when he tries to light it, a brief fight ensues, interrupted by the arrival of their guests: Dave Hedgehog and Spudgun. Richie insists the group all drink a sherry-glass of gravy (Spudgun protesting heavily) before they take their seats for Christmas lunch.
Richie's culinary skills alas have deserted him - the potatoes have hardened to the point they can smash plates, and following a bout of bird-related innuendos he finds that the turkey has shrivelled to a smouldering lump of charcoal. Christmas pudding follows, only for Eddie's vodka margarine to prove overly good at sustaining a flame, resulting in an extinguisher-foam covered table.
After the failed dinner, the men withdraw to the drawing-room, with Spudgun, Eddie and Hedgehog each donning paper crown hats from Christmas crackers, while Richie attempts to drum-up support for his Christmas charades
Charades
Charades or charade is a word guessing game. In the form most played today, it is an acting game in which one player acts out a word or phrase, often by pantomiming similar-sounding words, and the other players guess the word or phrase. The idea is to use physical rather than verbal language to...
game. An increasingly irritable Eddie puts a stop to this, demanding they each just have Goldfinger
Goldfinger (film)
Goldfinger is the third spy film in the James Bond series and the third to star Sean Connery as the fictional MI6 agent James Bond. Released in 1964, it is based on the novel of the same name by Ian Fleming. The film also stars Honor Blackman as Bond girl Pussy Galore and Gert Fröbe as the title...
and pack it in.
Richie is drawn away by the ringing doorbell, annoyed that it may be charity collectors, only to discover a baby has been left on their doorstep. Introducing it to the others, Eddie is immediately offended, insisting Richie get rid of it, worried it would come between them, and commenting that he should have been more careful. The baby begins to cry and Richie places the cot on the table in front of them, covering his face with a towel to play peekaboo
Peekaboo
Peekaboo is a game played with babies. In the game, the older player hides his/her face, pops back into the baby's view, and says Peekaboo! sometimes followed by I see you!...
to quieten the child.
Sad that this newborn child has no home and no presents on his first Christmas Day, Spudgun decides to donate his box of Terry's
Terry's
Terry's was a chocolate and confectionery maker in York, England. Its history stretched back to 1823, but in 1993 it was taken over by Kraft Foods. The York factory closed in 2005 and Terry's products are now produced in other Kraft facilities in Poland, Sweden, Belgium, and...
All Gold chocolates to the infant. Eddie succumbs to guilt, too, giving the boy his Frankenstein's monster
Frankenstein's monster
Frankenstein's monster is a fictional character that first appeared in Mary Shelley's novel, Frankenstein, or The Modern Prometheus. The creature is often erroneously referred to as "Frankenstein", but in the novel the creature has no name...
mask, while Hedgehog is compelled to give his bottle of aftershave
Aftershave
Aftershave describes a lotion, gel, balm, powder, or liquid used mainly by men after they have finished shaving. It may contain an antiseptic agent such as denatured alcohol or stearate citrate to prevent infection of cuts...
- a new brand called Grrrr. Richie increasingly notices a pattern, finally realizing: "Gold, Frankenstein and Grrrr... and you're all wearing crowns
Biblical Magi
The Magi Greek: μάγοι, magoi), also referred to as the Wise Men, Kings, Astrologers, or Kings from the East, were a group of distinguished foreigners who were said to have visited Jesus after his birth, bearing gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh...
! And I'm a virgin!" His blue "headscarf" clinches it for him, and he becomes convinced he is the new virgin mother of God
Mary (mother of Jesus)
Mary , commonly referred to as "Saint Mary", "Mother Mary", the "Virgin Mary", the "Blessed Virgin Mary", or "Mary, Mother of God", was a Jewish woman of Nazareth in Galilee...
.
Spudgun volunteers to change the baby's nappy whilst Hedgehog attempts to phone the Pope - surprised to find from the phone book that the Pope
Pope
The Pope is the Bishop of Rome, a position that makes him the leader of the worldwide Catholic Church . In the Catholic Church, the Pope is regarded as the successor of Saint Peter, the Apostle...
lives in Twickenham
Twickenham
Twickenham is a large suburban town southwest of central London. It is the administrative headquarters of the London Borough of Richmond upon Thames and one of the locally important district centres identified in the London Plan...
. Eddie, meanwhile, refuses to allow the arrival of the son of God to spoil his Christmas, and indulges in plenty of booze. Whilst Richie is rebuking him for this shameful act, the boys' landlord, Mr. Harrison bursts in.
Harrison reveals to a genuinely saddened Richie that the baby boy is merely his grandson, left in a hurry because his mother-in-law had had a heart attack, and he is soon followed by his daughter. Richie and Eddie soon perk up, though, when she asks if she may breast-feed young Master Bates in their kitchen... Eddie and Richie look at her breast-feeding then themselves and shout "MERRY BLOODY CHRISTMAS!!"
Continuity and Production Errors
- This episode was over long and edited down by five minutes for transmission, producing a number of discontinuities. The original uncut version is now available on the series 2 DVD.
- During the episode, Eddie wants to watch Noel's Christmas Family Video AccidentsNoel EdmondsNoel Ernest Edmonds, is an English broadcaster and executive, who made his name as a DJ on BBC Radio 1 in the UK. He has presented many light entertainment television programmes, including Multi-Coloured Swap Shop, Top of the Pops, The Late, Late Breakfast Show, Telly Addicts, Noel's Saturday...
(a fictional program title to parody a genre of programming involving Noel Edmonds), but Richie won't let him. In reality, the time Eddie was about to tune the television to BBC 1, he would've been watching Children's television. - Richie cuts off his finger with a knife. Eddie attempts to staple the finger back to his hand, but after various staples, he realises it was the wrong finger. Throughout the rest of the episode, no damage is seen to any other of Richie's fingers.
- Following on from the above, for a majority of the episode, Richie's finger is attached to his hand with tape. In one scene, his finger is trapped in the window. At one point, it is noticeable that Mayall's real finger is bent underneath it.
- Richie believes he has broken his leg after Eddie caught him acting as Santa Claus. He them re-enters Eddie's bedroom as himself, and limps. However, he does not limp for the rest of the episode.
- Richie lights the Christmas pudding and goes up in a blaze. The flames were added via an optical effect, and this is obvious when Richie is moving the pudding, and the flames do not follow. A similar effect was used in the same episode involving a Christmas tree, but was really alight the next shot, despite the flames dying down. In Series 3, this effect was scrapped, and controlled flames were used (see Dough).
Cast
| Cast | Characters |
| Rik Mayall Rik Mayall Richard Michael "Rik" Mayall is an English comedian, writer, and actor. He is known for his comedy partnership with Ade Edmondson, his over-the-top, energetic portrayal of characters, and as a pioneer of alternative comedy in the early 1980s... |
Richie |
| Adrian Edmondson | Eddie |
| Charlie Biddle | Johnny Bates |
| Tina Foley | Valerie Bates |
| Steven O'Donnell Steven O'Donnell (actor) Steven O'Donnell is an English actor.Before O'Donnell became an actor he worked for 5 years in Charing Cross Hospital as a Scientific Officer in a medical laboratory. He has appeared in several comedies with Rik Mayall... |
Spudgun |
| Christopher Ryan Christopher Ryan Christopher Ryan is an English actor. Ryan is perhaps best known for his role as Mike "The Cool Person" in the BBC comedy series The Young Ones.-Early life:... |
Hedgehog |
| Roger Sloman Roger Sloman Roger Sloman is an English actor. Born in the Harlesden district of London, he has performed in dozens of television and film appearances since the late 1970s... |
Mr Harrison |