Don't Crush That Dwarf, Hand Me the Pliers
Encyclopedia
Don't Crush That Dwarf, Hand Me the Pliers is The Firesign Theatre's
third comedy
recording for Columbia Records
, released in 1970. In 1983, The New Rolling Stone Record Guide called it "the greatest comedy album ever made".
In Phil Austin
's notes to the 1987 Mobile Fidelity re-release of this album he says "Dwarf is the story of the five ages of Man and in particular, the five ages of one George Leroy Tirebiter; a man named after a dog"
The piece centers on the character of Tirebiter (played by David Ossman
), a former child actor
who spends his time watching himself on late-night television.
As his evening unfolds, the listener hears "excerpts" from fictional movies in Tirebiter's past. High School Madness stars 'Dave Casman' as Peorgie Tirebiter and 'Joe Berkman' as his sidekick, Mudhead—although an earlier portion of the recording intentionally blurs the distinction between fantasy and reality by identifying Tirebiter (not 'Casman') as having been the star of the "Porgie and Mudhead" films, rather than a character in those films. High School Madness is a parody of the Aldrich Family
radio show, the Archie
comic book and of 1950s youth culture in general. Parallel Hell is a war film
set in Korea
, where the soldiers (including Tirebiter) debate the seemingly endless war. These are interspersed with commercials and other staples of late-night television (including a televangelist and a talk show
) as Tirebiter randomly changes channels. The broadcasts contain many references to warfare and Cold War
paranoia (product names such as Napalm
olive), indicating that Tirebiter's world exists under martial law
.
The catchphrase, "This is UTV, for you, the viewer!" is eerily prophetic of what in the following decade would become standard television viewing habits for Americans, after the rise of cable television
. Television sets of the era generally had two tuning dials, VHF and UHF. The letter "U" was a position on some television sets' VHF dial between channels 13 and 2 which engaged the UHF channel tuner/dial, making the joke a triple entendre.
Another satirical
comment from the album is the slogan of The Howl of the Wolf Movie: "Presenting honest stories of working people as told by rich Hollywood stars".
It has been re-released on CD at least five times:
"FIREZINE: Linques!." Firesign Theatre FAQ. 20 Jan. 2006
Firesign Theatre. Firesign Theatre. 19 Jan. 2006
At the Official Firesign Theatre Website, see specifically http://www.firesigntheatre.com/albums/album.php?album=dctd
's conversation from How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All
, and the album ends with George running outside to buy an ice cream cone from a passing ice cream truck, the chimes thereof opening the next album, I Think We're All Bozos on This Bus
.
.
In 1946, a mongrel whose owner had died wandered onto the campus of the University of Southern California
and was adopted by the students as an unofficial mascot. The dog acquired a reputation for chasing cars, hence the name. The dog became so famous that at one point he was kidnapped by rival students from UCLA, who shaved their school's letters into his fur. He was run over and killed by a car in 1950.
In his notes to the Mobile Fidelity release, Austin says that the five ages of George Leroy Tirebiter are:
This description of Tirebiter's "ages" are quoted directly from the notes to the Mobile Fidelity release.
, a list of sound recordings that "are culturally, historically, or aesthetically important, and/or inform or reflect life in the United States
."
-friend of the troupe who noted that all four members had been born under "fire signs." The cover art, by Robert Grossman
, features caricatures of the members as their respective astrological animals: Austin as a ram (Aries
), Proctor as a lion
(Leo
), and Bergman and Ossman as two Satyr
s or Centaur
s (Sagittarius
). The Sagittarians are armed, respectively, with a bow and suction-cup arrow and a squirt gun, and the other members are seated on their backs. An eponymous pair of pliers
sits on the ground beneath them.
The Firesign Theatre
The Firesign Theatre is an American comedy troupe consisting of Phil Austin, Peter Bergman, David Ossman and Philip Proctor. Their brand of surrealistic humor is best known through their record albums, which acquired a cult following in the late 1960s and early '70s.The troupe began as live radio...
third comedy
Comedy
Comedy , as a popular meaning, is any humorous discourse or work generally intended to amuse by creating laughter, especially in television, film, and stand-up comedy. This must be carefully distinguished from its academic definition, namely the comic theatre, whose Western origins are found in...
recording for Columbia Records
Columbia Records
Columbia Records is an American record label, owned by Japan's Sony Music Entertainment, operating under the Columbia Music Group with Aware Records. It was founded in 1888, evolving from an earlier enterprise, the American Graphophone Company — successor to the Volta Graphophone Company...
, released in 1970. In 1983, The New Rolling Stone Record Guide called it "the greatest comedy album ever made".
Detailed Track Information and Commentary
This was The Firesign Theatre's first album wherein a single narrative took up both sides of the album.In Phil Austin
Phil Austin
Phil Austin is a comedian and writer. He was born in Denver, Colorado and later grew up in Fresno, California, attending Fresno High School...
's notes to the 1987 Mobile Fidelity re-release of this album he says "Dwarf is the story of the five ages of Man and in particular, the five ages of one George Leroy Tirebiter; a man named after a dog"
The piece centers on the character of Tirebiter (played by David Ossman
David Ossman
David Ossman is an American writer and comedian, best known as a member of The Firesign Theatre.-Career:...
), a former child actor
Child actor
The term child actor or child actress is generally applied to a child acting in motion pictures or television, but also to an adult who began his or her acting career as a child; to avoid confusion, the latter is also called a former child actor...
who spends his time watching himself on late-night television.
As his evening unfolds, the listener hears "excerpts" from fictional movies in Tirebiter's past. High School Madness stars 'Dave Casman' as Peorgie Tirebiter and 'Joe Berkman' as his sidekick, Mudhead—although an earlier portion of the recording intentionally blurs the distinction between fantasy and reality by identifying Tirebiter (not 'Casman') as having been the star of the "Porgie and Mudhead" films, rather than a character in those films. High School Madness is a parody of the Aldrich Family
The Aldrich Family
The Aldrich Family, a popular radio teenage situation comedy , was also presented in films, television and comic books. In the radio series' well-remembered weekly opening exchange, awkward teen Henry's mother called, "Hen-reeeeeeeeeeeee! Hen-ree Al-drich!", and he responded with a breaking...
radio show, the Archie
Archie
-People:* Archie Karas , a Greek gambler known for turning $50 into $40 million before losing it all* Archie Brown , a British political scientist and historian* Archie Macpherson, Scottish sports broadcaster* Archie Thompson, Australian footballer...
comic book and of 1950s youth culture in general. Parallel Hell is a war film
War film
War films are a film genre concerned with warfare, usually about naval, air or land battles, sometimes focusing instead on prisoners of war, covert operations, military training or other related subjects. At times war films focus on daily military or civilian life in wartime without depicting battles...
set in Korea
Korean War
The Korean War was a conventional war between South Korea, supported by the United Nations, and North Korea, supported by the People's Republic of China , with military material aid from the Soviet Union...
, where the soldiers (including Tirebiter) debate the seemingly endless war. These are interspersed with commercials and other staples of late-night television (including a televangelist and a talk show
Talk show
A talk show or chat show is a television program or radio program where one person discuss various topics put forth by a talk show host....
) as Tirebiter randomly changes channels. The broadcasts contain many references to warfare and Cold War
Cold War
The Cold War was the continuing state from roughly 1946 to 1991 of political conflict, military tension, proxy wars, and economic competition between the Communist World—primarily the Soviet Union and its satellite states and allies—and the powers of the Western world, primarily the United States...
paranoia (product names such as Napalm
Napalm
Napalm is a thickening/gelling agent generally mixed with gasoline or a similar fuel for use in an incendiary device, primarily as an anti-personnel weapon...
olive), indicating that Tirebiter's world exists under martial law
Martial law
Martial law is the imposition of military rule by military authorities over designated regions on an emergency basis— only temporary—when the civilian government or civilian authorities fail to function effectively , when there are extensive riots and protests, or when the disobedience of the law...
.
The catchphrase, "This is UTV, for you, the viewer!" is eerily prophetic of what in the following decade would become standard television viewing habits for Americans, after the rise of cable television
Cable television
Cable television is a system of providing television programs to consumers via radio frequency signals transmitted to televisions through coaxial cables or digital light pulses through fixed optical fibers located on the subscriber's property, much like the over-the-air method used in traditional...
. Television sets of the era generally had two tuning dials, VHF and UHF. The letter "U" was a position on some television sets' VHF dial between channels 13 and 2 which engaged the UHF channel tuner/dial, making the joke a triple entendre.
Another satirical
Satire
Satire is primarily a literary genre or form, although in practice it can also be found in the graphic and performing arts. In satire, vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, ideally with the intent of shaming individuals, and society itself, into improvement...
comment from the album is the slogan of The Howl of the Wolf Movie: "Presenting honest stories of working people as told by rich Hollywood stars".
Personnel
- Ambient's Noyes Choral – chorus
- Annalee – voices, stylist
- Phil AustinPhil AustinPhil Austin is a comedian and writer. He was born in Denver, Colorado and later grew up in Fresno, California, attending Fresno High School...
– guitar, keyboards, vocals, liner notes producer, engineer - Oona Elliott – vocals
- Firesign Theatre – producer
- John Fresno – bass, guitar, saxophone, vocals
- Bob Grossman – artwork
- James William Guercio – producer
- Jerry Hochman – engineer
- Little Bubbles – sax
- William Malloch – creative consultant
- Mindermast Mental Music Hall One-Man Sympathy Orchestra – orchestra
- David OssmanDavid OssmanDavid Ossman is an American writer and comedian, best known as a member of The Firesign Theatre.-Career:...
– percussion, vocals - Elizabeth Plumb – photography
- Procmer – director
- Phil Proctor – flute, violin, vocals
- John Rose – photography
Issues and reissues
This album was originally released simultaneously on LP, 8 Track, and Cassette.- LP - Columbia C-30102
- 8 Track - Columbia 18C-30102
- Cassette - Columbia CT-30102
It has been re-released on CD at least five times:
- 1987 - Mobile Fidelity MFCD-880
- 2001 - Acadia ACA8018
- 2001 - Laugh.com LGH1072
- 2001 (October) - Columbia CK-30102
- 2001 (December) - Sony/Legacy - CK-85775
"FIREZINE: Linques!." Firesign Theatre FAQ. 20 Jan. 2006
Firesign Theatre. Firesign Theatre. 19 Jan. 2006
At the Official Firesign Theatre Website, see specifically http://www.firesigntheatre.com/albums/album.php?album=dctd
Continuity with other Firesign albums
George Tirebiter's failed pizza-to-go order is the other half of Nick DangerNick Danger (fictional character)
Nick Danger is a fictional character featured in several of the albums produced by the comedy group The Firesign Theatre: How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All , Nick Danger: The Case of the Missing Shoe , The Three Faces of Al and The Bride of Firesign .Voiced by...
's conversation from How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All
How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All
How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All is the second comedy album recorded by The Firesign Theatre. It was originally released in 1969 by Columbia Records.-Side one:...
, and the album ends with George running outside to buy an ice cream cone from a passing ice cream truck, the chimes thereof opening the next album, I Think We're All Bozos on This Bus
I Think We're All Bozos on This Bus
I Think We're All Bozos on This Bus is the fourth comedy recording made by The Firesign Theatre for Columbia Records. It was released in 1971 and is the last of a tetralogy, comprising their first four albums...
.
Origin of George Tirebiter's name
There was a real dog named George TirebiterGeorge Tirebiter
George Tirebiter was the unofficial mascot of the University of Southern California in the 1940s. When a stray dog was discovered by a group of USC students at Curry's Ice Cream parlor, one student remarked that the dog looked like a Navy V-12 student named George Kuhns...
.
In 1946, a mongrel whose owner had died wandered onto the campus of the University of Southern California
University of Southern California
The University of Southern California is a private, not-for-profit, nonsectarian, research university located in Los Angeles, California, United States. USC was founded in 1880, making it California's oldest private research university...
and was adopted by the students as an unofficial mascot. The dog acquired a reputation for chasing cars, hence the name. The dog became so famous that at one point he was kidnapped by rival students from UCLA, who shaved their school's letters into his fur. He was run over and killed by a car in 1950.
In his notes to the Mobile Fidelity release, Austin says that the five ages of George Leroy Tirebiter are:
- Tirebiter the Child, called Peorge or Peorgie
- Tirebiter the College student, called George Tirebiter Camden N200-R
- Tirebiter the Soldier, called Lt. Tirebiter
- Tirebiter the Actor, called Dave Casman
- Tirebiter the Old Man, called George Leroy Tirebiter
This description of Tirebiter's "ages" are quoted directly from the notes to the Mobile Fidelity release.
Reception
In 2006, Dwarf was added to the National Recording RegistryNational Recording Registry
The National Recording Registry is a list of sound recordings that "are culturally, historically, or aesthetically important, and/or inform or reflect life in the United States." The registry was established by the National Recording Preservation Act of 2000, which created the National Recording...
, a list of sound recordings that "are culturally, historically, or aesthetically important, and/or inform or reflect life in the United States
United States
The United States of America is a federal constitutional republic comprising fifty states and a federal district...
."
Cover art
The name "Firesign Theatre" was suggested by an astrologerAstrology
Astrology consists of a number of belief systems which hold that there is a relationship between astronomical phenomena and events in the human world...
-friend of the troupe who noted that all four members had been born under "fire signs." The cover art, by Robert Grossman
Robert Grossman
Robert Grossman is an American painter, sculptor, filmmaker, and author.In a career spanning nearly fifty years, Grossman's illustrations have appeared over 500 times on the covers of various national publications...
, features caricatures of the members as their respective astrological animals: Austin as a ram (Aries
Aries (astrology)
Aries is the first astrological sign in the Zodiac, which spans the zodiac between the zero degree and the 29th degree of celestial longitude. The Sun enters Aries when it reaches the northern vernal equinox, which is usually on March 21 each year, and remains in this sign until around April 20...
), Proctor as a lion
Lion
The lion is one of the four big cats in the genus Panthera, and a member of the family Felidae. With some males exceeding 250 kg in weight, it is the second-largest living cat after the tiger...
(Leo
Leo (astrology)
Leo is the fifth astrological sign of the Zodiac, originating from the constellation of Leo. In astrology, Leo is considered to be a "masculine", positive sign. It is also considered a fire sign and is one of four fixed signs ruled by the Sun.Individuals born when the Sun is in this sign are...
), and Bergman and Ossman as two Satyr
Satyr
In Greek mythology, satyrs are a troop of male companions of Pan and Dionysus — "satyresses" were a late invention of poets — that roamed the woods and mountains. In myths they are often associated with pipe-playing....
s or Centaur
Centaur
In Greek mythology, a centaur or hippocentaur is a member of a composite race of creatures, part human and part horse...
s (Sagittarius
Sagittarius (astrology)
Sagittarius is the ninth astrological sign in the Zodiac, which spans the zodiac between the 240th and 269th degree of celestial longitude...
). The Sagittarians are armed, respectively, with a bow and suction-cup arrow and a squirt gun, and the other members are seated on their backs. An eponymous pair of pliers
Pliers
Pliers are a hand tool used to hold objects firmly, for bending, or physical compression. Generally, pliers consist of a pair of metal first-class levers joined at a fulcrum positioned closer to one end of the levers, creating short jaws on one side of the fulcrum, and longer handles on the other...
sits on the ground beneath them.