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Bored of the Rings

Bored of the Rings

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Bored of the Rings is the title of a paperback parody of J. R. R. Tolkien
J. R. R. Tolkien
John Ronald Reuel Tolkien, CBE was an English writer, poet, philologist, and university professor, best known as the author of the classic high fantasy works The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, and The Silmarillion.Tolkien was Rawlinson and Bosworth Professor of Anglo-Saxon at Pembroke College,...

's The Lord of the Rings
The Lord of the Rings
The Lord of the Rings is a high fantasy epic written by English philologist and University of Oxford professor J. R. R. Tolkien. The story began as a sequel to Tolkien's earlier, less complex children's fantasy novel The Hobbit , but eventually developed into a much larger work. It was written in...

. This short novel was written by Henry N. Beard and Douglas C. Kenney, who later founded National Lampoon. It was published in 1969 by Signet
New American Library
New American Library is an American publisher based in New York, founded in 1948; it produced affordable paperback reprints of classics and scholarly works, as well as popular, pulp, and "hard-boiled" fiction. Non-fiction, original, and hardcopy issues were also produced.Victor Weybright and Kurt...

 for the Harvard Lampoon
Harvard Lampoon
The Harvard Lampoon is an undergraduate humor publication founded in 1876 at Harvard University in Cambridge, Massachusetts.-Overview:Published since 1876, The Harvard Lampoon is the world's longest continually published humor magazine. It is also the second longest-running English-language humor...



The parody generally follows the outline of The Lord of the Rings, including the preface, the prologue, poetry, and songs, while making light of what Tolkien made serious (e.g., "He would have finished him off then and there, but pity stayed his hand. It's a pity I've run out of bullets, he thought, as he went back up the tunnel..."). Names and words in the various languages are parodied with brand names which mimic their sounds (example: Moxie and Pepsi for Merry and Pippin). There are many topical references, some of which, like some of the brand names, are now dated. Regardless, it has the unusual distinction for a parody of having been continuously in print for the decades since it was first published .

Aside from the text itself, the book includes five elements that parody common features of mass-market books:
  • A laudatory back cover review, which on inspection was written at Harvard, possibly by the authors themselves.
  • Inside cover reviews which are entirely contrived, concluding with a quote by someone affiliated with the publication Our Loosely Enforced Libel Laws.
  • A list of other books in the "series", none of which exist.
  • A double page map which has almost nothing to do with the events in the text.
  • The first text a browsing reader is liable to see purports to be a salacious sample from the book, but the episode never happens in the main text, nor does anything else of that tone: the book has no explicit sexual content.

The Signet first edition cover, a parody of the 1965 Ballantine
Ballantine Books
Ballantine Books is a major book publisher located in the United States, founded in 1952 by Ian Ballantine with his wife, Betty Ballantine. It was acquired by Random House in 1973, which in turn was acquired by Bertelsmann AG in 1998 and remains part of that company today. Ballantine's logo is a...

 paperback cover by Barbara Remington
Barbara Remington
Barbara Remington is an American artist and illustrator. Born in Minnesota, she is probably best known for her cover-art for Ballantine Books' first paperback editions of J. R. R...

, was drawn by Muppets
The Muppets
The Muppets are a group of puppet characters created by Jim Henson starting in 1954–55. Although the term is often used to refer to any puppet that resembles the distinctive style of The Muppet Show, the term is both an informal name and legal trademark owned by the Walt Disney Company in reference...

 designer Michael K. Frith
Michael K. Frith
Michael Kingsbury Frith born July 8, 1941 in Bermuda, is the former Executive Vice President and Creative Director for Jim Henson Productions. His contributions to Muppet projects have been extensive and varied....

. Current publications have different artwork by Douglas Carrel, since the paperback cover art http://www.flavinscorner.com/remingtonart.jpg for Lord of the Rings prevalent in the 60s, then famous, is now obscure. William S. Donnell drew the "parody map" of Lower Middle Earth.


Notable characters from Lower Middle Earth
BOTR Allusion LOTR
Goodgulf Greyteeth, the good wizard
Wizard (Middle-earth)
In the fiction of J. R. R. Tolkien, the Wizards of Middle-earth are a group of beings outwardly resembling Men but possessing much greater physical and mental power. They are also called the Istari by the Elves. The Sindarin word is Ithryn...

Good Gulf, a brand name used by Gulf Oil
Gulf Oil
Gulf Oil was a major global oil company from the 1900s to the 1980s. The eighth-largest American manufacturing company in 1941 and the ninth-largest in 1979, Gulf Oil was one of the so-called Seven Sisters oil companies...

 for a premium grade of gasoline
Gasoline , or petrol , is a toxic, translucent, petroleum-derived liquid that is primarily used as a fuel in internal combustion engines. It consists mostly of organic compounds obtained by the fractional distillation of petroleum, enhanced with a variety of additives. Some gasolines also contain...

. Goodgulf was also "a discredited Rosicrucian
Rosicrucianism is a philosophical secret society, said to have been founded in late medieval Germany by Christian Rosenkreuz. It holds a doctrine or theology "built on esoteric truths of the ancient past", which, "concealed from the average man, provide insight into nature, the physical universe...

" and "a 32nd Degree Mason
Freemasonry is a fraternal organisation that arose from obscure origins in the late 16th to early 17th century. Freemasonry now exists in various forms all over the world, with a membership estimated at around six million, including approximately 150,000 under the jurisdictions of the Grand Lodge...

 and Honorary Shriner
The Ancient Arabic Order of the Nobles of the Mystic Shrine, also commonly known as Shriners and abbreviated A.A.O.N.M.S., established in 1870, is an appendant body to Freemasonry, based in the United States...

Gandalf Greyhame, also called Gandalf the Grey
Boggies From bog
A bog, quagmire or mire is a wetland that accumulates acidic peat, a deposit of dead plant material—often mosses or, in Arctic climates, lichens....

 or boggart
In Englishfolklore, a boggart is a household fairy which causes things to disappear, milk to sour, and dogs to go lame. Always malevolent, the boggart will follow its family wherever they flee...

 or bogey
Bogey or Bogie may refer to:* Bogeyman, boogeyman, boogyman, or bogyman, a legendary ghost-like monster with no specific appearance** Boggart, a mischievous household spirit** Bogle, a ghost in Scottish or northern English folklore...

/bogie or booger or boogie
Boogie is a repetitive, swung note or shuffle rhythm, "groove" or pattern used in blues which was originally played on the piano in boogie-woogie music. The characteristic rhythm and feel of the boogie was then adapted to guitar, double bass, and other instruments. The earliest recorded...

Hobbits are a fictional diminutive race who inhabit the lands of Middle-earth in J. R. R. Tolkien's fiction.Hobbits first appeared in the novel The Hobbit, in which the main protagonist, Bilbo Baggins, is the titular hobbit...

Dildo Bugger of Bag Eye Dildo
A dildo is a sex toy, often explicitly phallic in appearance, intended for bodily penetration during masturbation or sex with partners.- Description and uses :...

; bugger
Bugger is a slang word used in the vernacular British English, Australian English, Canadian English, New Zealand English, South African English, Caribbean English, Sri Lankan English and occasionally also in Malaysian English and Singaporean English, and rarely American English...

Bilbo Baggins
Bilbo Baggins
Bilbo Baggins is the protagonist and titular character of The Hobbit and a supporting character in The Lord of the Rings, two of the most well-known of J. R. R...

of Bag End
Frito Bugger Fritos
Frito-Lay North America is the division of PepsiCo that manufactures, markets and sells corn chips, potato chips and other snack foods. The primary snack food brands produced under the Frito-Lay name include Fritos corn chips, Cheetos cheese-flavored snacks, Doritos and Tostitos tortilla chips,...

, a brand of corn chips.
Frodo Baggins
Frodo Baggins
Frodo Baggins is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium.He is the main protagonist of Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings. He was a hobbit of the Shire who inherited Sauron's Ring from Bilbo Baggins and undertook the quest to destroy it in the fires of Mount Doom...

Spam Gangree Spam
Spam (food)
Spam is a canned precooked meat product made by the Hormel Foods Corporation, first introduced in 1937. The labeled ingredients in the classic variety of Spam are chopped pork shoulder meat, with ham meat added, salt, water, modified potato starch as a binder, and sodium nitrite as a preservative...

, a brand of processed, canned meat; gangrene
Gangrene is a serious and potentially life-threatening condition that arises when a considerable mass of body tissue dies . This may occur after an injury or infection, or in people suffering from any chronic health problem affecting blood circulation. The primary cause of gangrene is reduced blood...

Samwise Gamgee
Samwise Gamgee
Samwise Gamgee, later known as Samwise Gardner and commonly as Sam, is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium. Samwise is one of the chief characters in Tolkien's novel The Lord of the Rings, in which he fills an archetypical role as the sidekick of the protagonist, Frodo...

Moxie Dingleberry Moxie
Moxie is a carbonated beverage that was one of the first mass-produced soft drinks in the United States. It continues to be regionally popular today....

, a soft drink
Soft drink
A soft drink is a non-alcoholic beverage that typically contains water , a sweetener, and a flavoring agent...

 brand; see also dingleberry.
Meriadoc Brandybuck
Meriadoc Brandybuck, usually referred to as Merry, is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium, featured throughout his most famous work, The Lord of the Rings....

Pepsi Dingleberry Pepsi
Pepsi is a carbonated soft drink that is produced and manufactured by PepsiCo...

, a soft drink
Soft drink
A soft drink is a non-alcoholic beverage that typically contains water , a sweetener, and a flavoring agent...

Peregrin Took
Peregrin Took, more commonly known as Pippin, is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy novel The Lord of the Rings. Pippin is introduced as a Hobbit who plays a major role as one of the companions of Frodo Baggins, in his quest to destroy the One Ring.Peregrin was the only son of...

Stomper, or Arrowroot, son of Arrowshirt Stomp, arrowroot
Arrowroot, or obedience plant , Bermuda arrowroot, araru, ararao, is a large perennial herb found in rainforest habitats...

, a kind of starch used, for example, in bland biscuits for babies and the elderly; Arrow, a brand of men's dress shirts.
Strider or Aragorn
Aragorn II is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium, one of the main protagonists of The Lord of the Rings. He is first introduced by the name Strider, which the hobbits continue to call him...

, son of Arathorn
Gimlet, son of Groin A tool or cocktail
Gimlet (cocktail)
The gimlet is a cocktail made of gin and lime juice. A 1928 description of the drink was: "gin, a spot of lime, and soda" . A 1953 description was: "a real gimlet is half gin and half Rose's lime juice and nothing else" .For the vodka gimlet, replace gin with vodka...

 gimlet; groin
In human anatomy, the groin areas are the two creases at the junction of the torso with the legs, on either side of the pubic area. This is also known as the medial compartment of the thigh. A pulled groin muscle usually refers to a painful injury sustained by straining the hip adductor muscles...

Gimli (Middle-earth)
Gimli is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium, featured in The Lord of the Rings. A Dwarf warrior, he is the son of Glóin ....

, son of Glóin
Legolam Leg of lamb. Legolas
Legolas is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium, featured in The Lord of the Rings. He is an Elf of the Woodland Realm and one of nine members of the Fellowship of the Ring.- Literature :...

Orlon Orlon, a brand of acrylic fiber
Acrylic fiber
Acrylic fibers are synthetic fibers made from a polymer with an average molecular weight of ~100,000, about 1900 monomer units. To be called acrylic in the U.S, the polymer must contain at least 85% acrylonitrile monomer. Typical comonomers are vinyl acetate or methyl acrylate...

Elrond Half-elven is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium. He is introduced in The Hobbit, and plays a supporting role in The Lord of the Rings and The Silmarillion.-Character overview:...

Garfinkel Garfinckel's
Garfinckel's was a prominent department store chain based in Washington, D.C., that catered to a clientele of wealthy consumers. It declared Chapter 11, in June 1990, and ceased operations in 1990.-History:...

, a department store chain. Art Garfunkel, a pop singer.
In the fiction of J. R. R. Tolkien, Glorfindel is a name used twice for an Elf appearing in the tales of Middle-earth. He is introduced in various material relating to the First Age of Middle-earth, including The Silmarillion. The second instance is for a character of The Lord of the Rings, which...

Bromosel Bromo-Seltzer
Bromo-Seltzer , is an antacid used to relieve pain occurring together with heartburn, upset stomach, or acid indigestion. Originally produced by inventor Isaac E...

, an indigestion-relief product.
Boromir is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium. He appears in the first two volumes of The Lord of the Rings , and is mentioned in the last volume, The Return of the King....

Farahslax Farah, the company making "action slacks". Faramir
In J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium, Faramir is a fictional character appearing in The Lord of the Rings. He is introduced as the younger brother of Boromir of the Fellowship of the Ring and second son of Denethor II, the Steward of the realm of Gondor...

Benelux, steward of Twodor. Benelux
The Benelux is an economic union in Western Europe comprising three neighbouring countries, Belgium, the Netherlands, and Luxembourg. These countries are located in northwestern Europe between France and Germany...

, the union of Belgium, the Netherlands, and Luxembourg; two door, describing a type of car (contrasted with Fordor.)
Denethor II of the House of Húrin is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's The Return of the King, which is the third and final part of his novel The Lord of the Rings. In the novel, he is the 26th and penultimate ruling Steward of Gondor....

, steward of Gondor
Gondor is a fictional kingdom in J. R. R. Tolkien's writings, described as the greatest realm of Men in the west of Middle-earth by the end of the Third Age. The third volume of The Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King, is concerned with the events in Gondor during the War of the Ring and with...

Eörache, daughter of Eörlobe "Earache
Otalgia or an earache is ear pain. Primary otalgia is ear pain that originates inside the ear. Referred otalgia is ear pain that originates from outside the ear.Otalgia is not always associated with ear disease...

"; Earlobe
The human earlobe is composed of tough areolar and adipose connective tissues, lacking the firmness and elasticity of the rest of the pinna. Since the earlobe does not contain cartilage it has a large blood supply and may help to warm the ears and maintain balance. However earlobes are not...

Combining Éowyn
Éowyn is a fictional character in J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium, who appears in his most famous work, The Lord of the Rings. She is a noblewoman of Rohan who describes herself as a "shieldmaiden".-Literature:...

, daughter of Éomund
Éomund is a fictoinal character in J.R.R. Tolkien's legendarium. He appears in The Two Towers as a man of the House of Eorl in Rohan, the husband of Théodwyn and the father of Éomer and Éowyn, who were of great importance during the War of the Ring...

, and elements of Arwen
Arwen Undómiel is a fictional character in J.R.R. Tolkien's legendarium. She appears in his novel, The Lord of the Rings, usually published in three volumes. Arwen is one of the Half-elven who lived during the Third Age.-Literature:...

Tim Benzedrine Benzedrine
Benzedrine is the trade name of the racemic mixture of amphetamine . It was marketed under this brandname in the USA by Smith, Kline & French in the form of inhalers, starting in 1928...

, a stimulant drug popular during the 1960s, notably with Harvard professor Timothy Leary
Timothy Leary
Timothy Francis Leary was an American psychologist and writer, known for his advocacy of psychedelic drugs. During a time when drugs like LSD and psilocybin were legal, Leary conducted experiments at Harvard University under the Harvard Psilocybin Project, resulting in the Concord Prison...

Tom Bombadil
Tom Bombadil
Tom Bombadil is a supporting character in J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium. He appears in Tolkien's high fantasy epic The Lord of the Rings, published in 1954 and 1955. In the first volume, The Fellowship of the Ring, Frodo Baggins and company meet Bombadil in the Old Forest...

Hashberry, wife of Tim Benzedrine "Hashbury", the Haight-Ashbury district of San Francisco, or hash(ish)
Hashish is a cannabis preparation composed of compressed stalked resin glands, called trichomes, collected from the unfertilized buds of the cannabis plant. It contains the same active ingredients but in higher concentrations than unsifted buds or leaves...

The botanical definition of a berry is a fleshy fruit produced from a single ovary. Grapes are an example. The berry is the most common type of fleshy fruit in which the entire ovary wall ripens into an edible pericarp. They may have one or more carpels with a thin covering and fleshy interiors....

Goldberry is a supporting character from J. R. R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings. Also known as the "River-woman's daughter," she is the wife of Tom Bombadil...

Goddam God damn
Damnation is the concept of everlasting divine punishment and/or disgrace, especially the punishment for sin as threatened by God . A damned being "in damnation" is said to be either in Hell, or living in a state wherein they are divorced from Heaven and/or in a state of disgrace from God's favor...

, a common oath.
Gollum is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's legendarium. He was introduced in the author's fantasy novel The Hobbit, and became an important supporting character in its sequel, The Lord of the Rings....

Karsh, Narc of the fighting Otto-wah
Goulash, Narc of the Ohma-hah
Yousuf Karsh
Yousuf Karsh
Yousuf Karsh, CC was a Canadian photographer of Armenian heritage, and one of the most famous and accomplished portrait photographers of all time.-Biography:...

, Canadian portrait photographer, Ottawa, Canada.
Goulash is a soup or stew of meat, noodles and vegetables , seasoned with paprika and other spices. Originating in Hungary, goulash is also a popular meal in Austria, Croatia, Czech Republic, Romania, Scandinavia, Serbia, Slovakia, Slovenia and the north-eastern Italian region of Friuli Venezia...

, Omaha (tribe)
Omaha (tribe)
The Omaha are a federally recognized Native American nation which lives on the Omaha Reservation in northeastern Nebraska and western Iowa, United States...

, Narc (Narcotics).
Uglúk, Grishnákh, Orcs
Orc (Middle-earth)
In J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy writings, Orcs or Orks are a race of creatures who are used as soldiers and henchmen by both the greater and lesser villains of The Silmarillion and The Lord of the Rings — Morgoth, Sauron and Saruman...

, Uruk-hai
The Uruk-hai are fictional characters in J. R. R. Tolkien's fictional universe of Middle-earth. They are introduced in The Lord of the Rings as an advanced breed or breeds of Orcs that serve Sauron and Saruman...

Cellophane and Lavalier Cellophane
Cellophane is a thin, transparent sheet made of regenerated cellulose. Its low permeability to air, oils, greases, bacteria and water makes it useful for food packaging...

, an inexpensive cellulose product; Lavalier
A lavalier is a type of jewelry, consisting of a pendant, sometimes with one stone, suspended from a necklace.-General jewelry:A lavalier is named for the type of pendant popularized by the Duchesse de la Vallière, a mistress of King Louis XIV of France. Within the fashion world, the name was...

, a jewelled pendant.
Celeborn is a fictional character in J.R.R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium. He appears in The Lord of the Rings as the Elven husband of Galadriel, Lord of the Galadhrim; and co-ruler along with Galadriel of Lothlórien. He was the father of Celebrían — the wife of Elrond — and thus the...

and Galadriel
Galadriel is a character created by J.R.R. Tolkien, appearing in his Middle-earth legendarium. She appears in The Lord of the Rings, The Silmarillion, and Unfinished Tales....

Birdseye of the Vee-Ates Birds Eye
Birds Eye
__FORCETOC__Birds Eye is an international brand of frozen foods owned by Pinnacle Foods in North America and by private equity group Permira in Europe....

, a company selling frozen vegetables (also obliquely references their competitor's trademark the jolly Green Giant
Green Giant
Green Giant and Le Sueur are brands of frozen and canned vegetables owned by General Mills. The mascot of Green Giant is the Jolly Green Giant....

V8 (beverage)
V8 (beverage)
V8 Vegetable Juice is a trademark name for beverage products sold worldwide and made from either seven vegetables plus tomatoes or a mixture of vegetables, tomatoes, and other fruits...

, a vegetable drink.
Treebeard is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth fantasy writings. The eldest of the species of Ents, he is said to live in the ancient Forest of Fangorn and stands fourteen feet in height and is tree-like in appearance, with leafy hair and a rigid structure. Fangorn Forest...

of the Ent
Ents are a race of beings in J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy world Middle-earth who closely resemble trees. They are similar to the talking trees in folklore around the world. Their name is derived from the Anglo-Saxon word for giant....

Sorhed, the evil wizard, ruler of Fordor "Sore head"; four door, describing a style of car. Sauron
Sauron is the primary antagonist and titular character of the epic fantasy novel The Lord of the Rings by J. R. R. Tolkien.In the same work, he is revealed to be the same character as "the Necromancer" from Tolkien's earlier novel The Hobbit...

, ruler of Mordor
In J. R. R. Tolkien's fictional universe of Middle-earth, Mordor or Morhdorh was the dwelling place of Sauron, in the southeast of northwestern Middle-earth to the East of Anduin, the great river. Orodruin, a volcano in Mordor, was the destination of the Fellowship of the Ring in the quest to...

Serutan the wizard of Isinglass Serutan
Serutan was an early fiber-type laxative product which was widely promoted on U.S. radio and television from the 1930s through the 1960s. It was manufactured by the J. B. Williams Co., which was founded in 1885 and bought out by Nabisco in 1971....

 is a laxative
Laxatives are foods, compounds, or drugs taken to induce bowel movements or to loosen the stool, most often taken to treat constipation. Certain stimulant, lubricant, and saline laxatives are used to evacuate the colon for rectal and/or bowel examinations, and may be supplemented by enemas under...

 ("Natures" spelled backward);
Isinglass is a substance obtained from the dried swim bladders of fish. It is a form of collagen used mainly for the clarification of wine and beer. It can also be cooked into a paste for specialized gluing purposes....

, collagen
Collagen is a group of naturally occurring proteins found in animals, especially in the flesh and connective tissues of mammals. It is the main component of connective tissue, and is the most abundant protein in mammals, making up about 25% to 35% of the whole-body protein content...

 from the dried swim bladders of fish. Used as finings
FiningsThe term is a mass noun rather than a plural. are substances that are usually added at or near the completion of the processing of brewing wine, beer and various nonalcoholic juice beverages. Their purpose is for removal of organic compounds; to either improve clarity or adjust flavor/aroma...

 in the brewing process, and in confectionery before gelatin
Gelatin is a translucent, colorless, brittle , flavorless solid substance, derived from the collagen inside animals' skin and bones. It is commonly used as a gelling agent in food, pharmaceuticals, photography, and cosmetic manufacturing. Substances containing gelatin or functioning in a similar...

 became widely available.
Saruman the White is a fictional character and a major antagonist in J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy novel The Lord of the Rings. He is leader of the Istari, wizards sent to Middle-earth in human form by the godlike Valar to challenge Sauron, the main antagonist of the tale, but later on aims at gaining...

, the wizard of Isengard
In J. R. R. Tolkien's fictional universe of Middle-earth, Isengard , a translation of the Sindarin Angrenost, was a large fortress. Both names mean "Iron fortress" In J. R. R. Tolkien's fictional universe of Middle-earth, Isengard , a translation of the Sindarin Angrenost, was a large fortress....

Gwanho the Windlord, an eagle Guano
Guano is the excrement of seabirds, cave dwelling bats, and seals. Guano manure is an effective fertilizer due to its high levels of phosphorus and nitrogen and also its lack of odor. It was an important source of nitrates for gunpowder...

, bird or bat droppings.
Wormcast Worm castings
Vermicompost is the product or process of composting utilizing various species of worms, usually red wigglers, white worms, and earthworms to create a heterogeneous mixture of decomposing vegetable or food waste, bedding materials, and vermicast...

Gríma Wormtongue
Schlob Slob or schlub. Shelob
Shelob is a fictional character from J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium. She appears at the end of the fourth book, second volume , of The Lord of the Rings.-Literature:...

Ballhog Ball hog
Ball hog
A ball hog is a derisive term in basketball for a player that handles the ball exclusively to the point of impairing the team. "Ball hogging" is generally considered unacceptable playing behavior at all levels of basketball competition. It is not a violation of the rules of basketball...

, a sports team member who consistently and inappropriately keeps the ball during play.
Balrogs are fictional demonic beings who appear in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium. Such creatures first appeared in print in his novel The Lord of the Rings, though they figured in earlier writings that posthumously appeared in The Silmarillion and other books.Balrogs are described as...

Narc Narc, an undercover narcotics agent. Orcs
Orc (Middle-earth)
In J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy writings, Orcs or Orks are a race of creatures who are used as soldiers and henchmen by both the greater and lesser villains of The Silmarillion and The Lord of the Rings — Morgoth, Sauron and Saruman...

Nozdrul "Nose drool". Nazgûl
The Nazgûl are fictional characters in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium...


Notable places from Lower Middle Earth
BOTR Allusion LOTR
the Nattily Wood
the Evelyn Wood
Natalie Wood
Natalie Wood
Natalie Wood, born Natalia Nikolaevna Zacharenko was an American film and television actress. After first working in films as a child, Wood became a successful Hollywood star as a young adult, receiving three Academy Award nominations before she was 25 years old.Wood began acting in movies at the...

, an American actress
Evelyn Wood
Evelyn Wood (teacher)
Evelyn Nielsen Wood was an American educator and businessperson, widely known for coining the phrase speed reading and for creating a system to increase a reader's speed by a factor of two to five times, while increasing retention...

, popularizer of speed reading
Speed reading
Speed reading is a collection of reading methods which attempt to increase rates of reading without greatly reducing comprehension or retention. Methods include chunking and eliminating subvocalization...

The Old Forest
Old Forest
In J. R. R. Tolkien’s fictional universe of Middle-earth, the Old Forest is a small forested area which lies east of the Shire in Buckland....

Whee an English interjection
In grammar, an interjection or exclamation is a word used to express an emotion or sentiment on the part of the speaker . Filled pauses such as uh, er, um are also considered interjections...

: see wikt:whee
Bree (Middle-earth)
Bree is a fictional village in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth, east of the Shire and south of Fornost Erain. It is thought to have been inspired by the Buckinghamshire village of Brill, which Tolkien visited regularly in his early years at Oxford...

the Ngaio Marsh Ngaio Marsh
Ngaio Marsh
Dame Ngaio Marsh DBE , born Edith Ngaio Marsh, was a New Zealand crime writer and theatre director. There is some uncertainty over her birth date as her father neglected to register her birth until 1900...

, a New Zealand crime writer and theatre director
the Dead Marshes
Dead Marshes
The Dead Marshes is a fictional place from J. R. R. Tolkien's universe, Middle-earth.-Literature:Once a part of the ancient battlefield of Dagorlad, the Dead Marshes lie north-west of the Morannon, the principal entrance to Mordor...

Twodor Two-door (car) Gondor
Gondor is a fictional kingdom in J. R. R. Tolkien's writings, described as the greatest realm of Men in the west of Middle-earth by the end of the Third Age. The third volume of The Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King, is concerned with the events in Gondor during the War of the Ring and with...

Fordor Four-door (car) and the Fordor
Ford Fordor
The Ford Fordor, known officially as the Ford C11ADF, Station Wagon/Heavy Utility, 4x2, was a militarized station wagon used in World War II in North Africa. They often had roof hatches and sometimes had the roof completely removed.-External links:...

In J. R. R. Tolkien's fictional universe of Middle-earth, Mordor or Morhdorh was the dwelling place of Sauron, in the southeast of northwestern Middle-earth to the East of Anduin, the great river. Orodruin, a volcano in Mordor, was the destination of the Fellowship of the Ring in the quest to...

Roi-Tan, a brand of cigars Rohan
Rohan is a realm in J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy era of Middle-earth. It is a grassland which lies north of its ally Gondor and north-west of Mordor, the realm of Sauron, their enemy . It is inhabited by the Rohirrim, a people of herdsmen and farmers who are well-known for their horses and cavalry....

The Zazu Pits, a big trash-burning area in Fordor ZaSu Pitts
ZaSu Pitts
ZaSu Pitts was an American actress who starred in many silent dramas and comedies, transitioning to comedy sound films.-Early life:ZaSu Pitts was born in Parsons, Kansas to Rulandus and Nellie Pitts; she was the third of four children...

, an American film actress
The crater of Orodruin
Mount Doom
Mount Doom is a volcano in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth legendarium. It is located in the heart of the black land of Mordor and close to Barad-dûr, it is approximately high. Alternative names, in Tolkien's invented language of Sindarin, include Orodruin and Amon Amarth...

Sol Hurok, a mountain range on the edge of Fordor Sol Hurok
Sol Hurok
Sol Hurok was a world-famous 20th century American impresario.-Biography:...

, a 20th century American impresario.
The Ephel Dúath mountain range
Minas Troney Minestrone
Minestrone is the name for a variety of thick Italian soups made with vegetables, often with the addition of pasta or rice. Common ingredients include beans, onions, celery, carrots, stock, and tomatoes....

Minas Tirith
Minas Tirith
Minas Tirith , originally named Minas Anor, is a fictional city and castle in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth writings. It became the heavily fortified capital of Gondor in the second half of the Third Age...

Chikken Noodul Chicken noodle Minas Morgul
Minas Morgul
Minas Morgul , also known by its earlier name of Minas Ithil , is a fictional fortified city in J. R. R. Tolkien's Middle-earth...

Gallowine E & J Gallo Winery
E & J Gallo Winery
E & J Gallo Winery was founded in 1933 by Ernest Gallo and Julio Gallo in Modesto, California. E & J Gallo Winery is the largest exporter of California wines and is a large promoter of wines from Sonoma County.-History:...


Places which are only in the map

Some places which are only in the map of Lower Middle Earth, not in the story
BOTR Allusion
The Legendary Drillingrigs (a long way out to sea in the west) drilling rig
Drilling rig
A drilling rig is a machine which creates holes or shafts in the ground. Drilling rigs can be massive structures housing equipment used to drill water wells, oil wells, or natural gas extraction wells, or they can be small enough to be moved manually by one person...

 for petroleum
Petroleum or crude oil is a naturally occurring, flammable liquid consisting of a complex mixture of hydrocarbons of various molecular weights and other liquid organic compounds, that are found in geologic formations beneath the Earth's surface. Petroleum is recovered mostly through oil drilling...

the Islets of Langerhans (small offshore islands) Islets of Langerhans
Islets of Langerhans
The islets of Langerhans are the regions of the pancreas that contain its endocrine cells. Discovered in 1869 by German pathological anatomist Paul Langerhans at the age of 22, the islets of Langerhans constitute approximately 1 to 2% of the mass of the pancreas...

 in anatomy
The Bay of Milhous (an inlet in the shape of a profile of Richard Milhous Nixon's head.) 37th US President from 1968 to 1974
Cantinflas (a shore in the Northeastern coast of the Bay of Milhous.) Professional name of Mexican comedian Mario Moreno Reyes
Fortino Mario Alfonso Moreno Reyes , was a Mexican comic film actor, producer, and screenwriter known professionally as Cantinflas. He often portrayed impoverished campesinos or a peasant of pelado origin...


The German translation Der Herr der Augenringe (lit.: Lord of the Eye Rings, metaphorically "Lord of the Eye Circles
Eye circles
Eye circles are distinguished circles around the eyes, caused by either:* Periorbital dark circles* Periorbital puffiness...

"), was done by Margaret Carroux (in 1969 and 1970, she translated Lord of the Rings into German).

The Finnish translation (Loru sorbusten herrasta, "A rhyme about the lord of Sorbus", Sorbus being a brand of rowan
The rowans or mountain-ashes are shrubs or small trees in genus Sorbus of family Rosaceae. They are native throughout the cool temperate regions of the Northern Hemisphere, with the highest species diversity in the mountains of western China and the Himalaya, where numerous apomictic microspecies...

-flavored wine manufactured by Altia
Altia Oyj or is a Finnish state-owned corporation based in Helsinki, which produces, imports, exports and markets alcoholic beverages. It operates in Finland, Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Estonia and Latvia. Altia has production plants in Koskenkorva and Rajamäki in Finland, in Tabasalu in Estonia and...

) was translated by Pekka Markkula and published in 1983. It did not sell well until later. Following the release of the Peter Jackson film trilogy, it was republished in 2002.

The Italian translation Il signore dei tranelli (lit."Lord of the cobweb") was issued by Fanucci Editore in 2002. The cover is made by Piero Crida , the same person who designed the covers of the "Lord of the ring" translations issued by Rusconi Libri s.p.a. in 1977.

The French translation Lord of the Ringards (lit.: Lord of the Has-beens) was issued in 2002.

The Brazilian Portuguese translation O Fedor dos Anéis (lit.: The Stink of the Rings) was published in 2004.

Other uses of Bored of the Rings name

Bored of the Rings (computer game) is a text adventure game, written by Fergus McNeill.

MAD Magazine's own Lord of the Rings parody Bored of the Rings was illustrated by Hermann Mejia
Hermann Mejia
Hermann Mejía is a Venezuelan-born illustrator, painter and sculptor living in New York City. His caricature-driven work frequently appears in MAD Magazine.-Early life and education:...

 and written by Desmond Devlin
Desmond Devlin
Desmond Devlin is an American comedy writer. His work has appeared in the pages of MAD for a quarter-century, and he ranks as one of the magazine's ten most frequent non-illustrating writers...

. The Fellowship of the Ring: The Feeble Shtick of Ka-Ching!, (April 2002); The Two Towers: The Two+ Hours, (April 2003); The Return of the King
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King is a 2003 epic fantasy-drama film directed by Peter Jackson that is based on the second and third volumes of J. R. R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings...

: Rehash of the Thing (April 2004).
A few characters have the same names as the book parody or similar ones (Legolamb, Sorehead, and Spam Gangrene). Other characters include: Dodo Gaggings, Billboard Gaggings, Gandoof the Gray (or Gandoof the White), Argon, Gimmicki, Golfclub (aka Cheeseball or Jar-Jar Jr.), Baggybuns, Pimple, Peppercorn, Aspercreme, and the Slobbits.

See also

  • Doon
    Doon (novel)
    National Lampoon's Doon is a parody of Frank Herbert's 1965 science fiction novel Dune, written by Ellis Weiner and published in 1984 by Pocket Books/Simon & Schuster, Inc. , and by Grafton Books the following year. In 1988 William F. Touponce noted that the only books which National Lampoon has...

    , another parody by National Lampoon, but not by the same authors
  • Dmitri Puchkov, an author who intentionally mistranslated Lord of the Rings
  • Kirill Eskov, author and paleontologist who wrote The Last Ring-bearer, Lord of the Rings told from Mordor's perspective.
  • Hordes of the Things
    Hordes of the Things
    Hordes of the Things may refer to:* Hordes of the Things, a BBC radio parody of The Lord of the Rings* Hordes of the Things, a miniature wargame...

    and ElvenQuest
    ElvenQuest is a comic fantasy broadcast on BBC Radio 4 by Anil Gupta and Richard Pinto, and starring Stephen Mangan, Alistair McGowan, Darren Boyd, Kevin Eldon, Sophie Winkleman and Dave Lamb. The series takes place in the world of Lower Earth, a parody of Middle-earth from The Lord of the Rings by...

    are radio parodies from the BBC
    The British Broadcasting Corporation is a British public service broadcaster. Its headquarters is at Broadcasting House in the City of Westminster, London. It is the largest broadcaster in the world, with about 23,000 staff...


External links