Radha Soami Satsang Beas
Posts  1 - 12  of  12
KuhalKanojiya
Radhasoami Babajji,

My name is Kushal
babaji i am not radhasoami follower. babaji, nowadays i am in very confusing situation.
i will need a right path to think.babaji i was almost become radhasoami.
because one girl make me.
every monday she used to talk to me all about sunday's satsang.
and it was our routin since 4 years.
But babaji when we talk to our parents about our relation, her parents refuse me just because of my "lower caste".
babaji she understands that it is not my fault that i born in LOWER CASTE. but her parents do not undestand and arrange her merriage with another person.
babaji we try to forget each other but we can not forget babaji.
babaji we decide to be unmerried forever.from that we will not go against of parents and we will save our love too.....babaji we hope for your blessings.




Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
palyal81
Replied to:  Radhasoami Babajji,...
Dear Kushal,

first of-all I would like to inform you that this is not RSSB website & neihter babaji is going to reply you in any manner.

secondly ,you should not highlight the name of your beloved in public site. so kindly erase her name.

dear this is personal issue, so kindly solve your owns.& this is very good decision that you will not go against your parents.

all the best..
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  palyal81
KuhalKanojiya
Replied to:  Dear Kushal, first of-all I would like to inform you...
Thaks for your kind reply.
and extremely sory for declairing her name.
and i would like to explain a little more.
we took that decision to be unmarried forever because
if she get merry with that another person, she told me she could not forget me, hence this will biggest unfair with that person too.
even i also could not accept any other girl.
so both we do not want to do that unfair things.
we will stay unmarried not even in relation.
just for save that love.and by this,parents would also not be unhappy.
we will stay single and make parents proud for us.
we will concentrate totally in development and career.
and she will continue her visits to dera every year for sewa.

we just hope babaji's blessings.....
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
palyal81
Replied to:  Thaks for your kind reply. and extremely sory for declairing her...
As replied by you above . it seems to be that ,you are intelligent gentle person.

Your two points made me impress .like you said "this will biggest unfair with that person too" this shows you are not selfish.

"we will concentrate totally in development and career." that's too good.

Iss duniya mei koi choti jaat/lower cast wala nahi hota hei, choti insan ki soch hoti hei.

All the best & god bless you both...
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
susingh
Replied to:  Thaks for your kind reply. and extremely sory for declairing her...
There appears to be some duality in thinking as if parents would be very much pleased and rather would feel proud by the decision of not marrying throughout the life, more so by claiming, on the other hand that love between the two would/could be kept intact or saved.

This approach needs a review, if and only if, both of them have any real concern with the feeling of their parents as per Indian culture.

Let one view the different life style in this way. In USA spouses are found from the market i.e. through live-in-relations for years. But longevity of marriage is very unscertain even in such marriages leading to divorce rate higher than arranged marriages of India. Similarly parents are also arranged through market, because in many families, it can be heard in common, “Here is my son from my second wife or here is my daughter from my third husband.”So in that system, even parents also get changed in one’s life. Even president of USA may have two sets of parents in the manner elaborated here.

But in that system, duality in thoughts, as is being displayed in the instant case, does not exist and has no space in their SANSKAARS, even though it has its own merits and demerits based on their values. In this system, neither parents become liability on their children at any stage nor their parent think of any responsibility towards their children beyond certain age. College education expenses, of students, are born through raising loans from banks, even if it is very expensive in USA. So, in a way, life can be taken as lacking detachment with the family members.

Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  susingh
KuhalKanojiya
Replied to:  There appears to be some duality in thinking as if parents...
Yes sir, only from above mentioned matter, you may think there is duality.
but do really you think that anything we should do for parent's happiness?
one more thing sir,
we decide to make parents feel proud not from being unmarried but from developing our self and our career.she wants to be doctor.
and sir please tell me is this really fair if parents suggest their children that "Beta whenever you make friends in school or collage, first ask his/her caste,only make friendship if he/she is of higher caste"
is this valid thing from parents?
she told me babaji saying there is nothing like caste.humans are humans.
and her parents said caste are most important factor in society.
sir,
we think on both sides.
and think that this is the middle path.
i will live with my mother and she will come to beas dera after completion of her doctorate degree.
she is very emotional and spiritual person sir,
she will provide her service to research and sewa.
and i will continue in my MNC job.of research and developement in TATA.
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
0027
Replied to:  Yes sir, only from above mentioned matter, you may think there...
In Indian culture, more stress is laid down on success in married life, which is, even, wished to be for seven lives.

But such success is neither guaranteed through arranged marriage nor through love marriage but does remain a wishful thinking. Anyhow, longevity of marriage, in India is definitely more by affording to live with any level of stress/struggle.

In that case, examples of marriages failing in US culture, after having maintained live-in-relations for several years before marriage, are quite alarming and eye opener, as have been shared/viewed in one of above posts.

In any case, inter-caste marriage should never be a reason for denying matrimonial relations. It is only compatibility between the two souls, which matters the most.

But don’t be double minded under the pretext of parents’ narrow thinking, more so when the two souls understand each other having known each other for four years.

But delaying marriage further, under any pretext, can cause more pain to parents as also to both the spouses and hence this suspense needs not be lingered on any more.

However, such a proposal does not and may not be relevant for any spiritual person in general and RSSB devotees in particular, because here again duality, arising out of spirituality, is seen more dominant/deterrent over social values/responsibilities of life. It is hoped that this aspect, based on long experiences, is considered on the top of all other factors, without any misgivings. This is so because there is mention of spouse wishes for providing her service to research and sewa even at some early stage/age, which is bound to be at the cost of kids as also her carrier. Do keep a note of this experience in diary, even if may not be found acceptable now.

Spirituality is a much bigger hurdle than parents even, for leading a long successful married life for a better carrier as also for the welfare of kids and the family, as a whole, which also includes care/service of parents in Indian culture. In fact, spirituality needs be thought about after fulfilling all the social/family liabilities at a later stage of life.
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  0027
JasvinderSingh
Replied to:  In Indian culture, more stress is laid down on success in...
...But doctors prescibe meditation and yoga for balanced life... Apbaf mat falao mere lal..
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  JasvinderSingh
KuhalKanojiya
Replied to:  ...But doctors prescibe meditation and yoga for balanced life... Apbaf mat...
Sir ji,
yeh decision thik hai na
hum parents ke khilaf jaa kar kuchh nahi karna chahte.
par hu wo bhi blindly accept nahee kar sakte.
just because we were deeply love each other.
and mere hisab se agar hum doosre kisi se shadi kar bhi le to wo to total compromise ho jayega.
to we decide to be unmerriad and hum apne career ko itna upar le kar jayenge k parents ko proud ho,
aur isase parents jyada khush honge.
hum total focus career and sewa me lagayenge.
Jasvinder singh ji thanx.
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
susingh
Replied to:  Sir ji, yeh decision thik hai na hum parents ke khilaf...
MAY GOD SHOWER ALL HIS BLESSINGS UPON YOU FOR BEST OF HEALTH. PROSPERITY AND HAPPINESS AS ALSO REVIEW OF THE ENTIRE ISSUE BY PARENTS ON BOTH SIDES FOR THE WELFARE OF THE ENTIRE FAMILY!
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
palyal
Replied to:  Sir ji, yeh decision thik hai na hum parents ke khilaf...
Abhi umar hai, shaadi kar lo, or usko bhi kaho ki kar le.

Abhi kuch saal thik lagega, jab dost log shadi kar lenge, tab akele ghar me baith kar afsos karoge.

ani zindagi bhi barbad karoge or uski bhi karoge.

Budape me akeli ladki ke liye zina bahut mushkil hai.
Save
Cancel
Reply
replied to:  KuhalKanojiya
palyal81
Replied to:  Radhasoami Babajji,...
Iski baton mei mat aao, isne mere name ki fake id banai hei
Save
Cancel
Reply
 
x
OK