No idea what to do here, I want to stop using coke so badly but I can't.

Hello.I can only give you SUGGESTIONS.You have already acknowledged the first requirement to begin recovery in NA, the DESIRE TO STOP USING.The next step is to make an effort to attend meetings if you are not already doing so.We must also admit that we are an addict,we are powerless over our addiction, we have NO CONTROL over our using and our lives are unmanageable when we use.I have been where you are I am coming up on 4 years clean in March. I'm telling you that not to brag because I am only one step away from using if I don't continue to attend meetings, work the steps,keep in contact with my sponsor, and if I ever go back to the OLD places, people, and things I am DONE.I'm telling you my clean time to let you know this program works. I am 43 years old and I used for 27 years of my life.I dont know what you have done to try to stop, but my suggestion is to go to treatment,and/or go to a NA meeeting and listen to those who are recovering from the disease of addiction.It is said that we continued to use even when we didn't want to, expecting different results, however if we continue to use, the results will be jails, institutions, or death. I do not want you to and I pray that you do not let those three things be the results of your life.You are stronger than you think you are.You have made the first step, reaching out for help.Now i SUGGEST you take ACTION and try what I have stated above.I did and am still doing those things and recovery is a beautiful thing.Don't beat yourself up just know that you are worthy and you deserve better. You deserve to enjoy life CLEAN being the wonderful person that I know you are inside and out.I pray to the God of my understanding that you seek and get the help you need so that you may see there is a better way to live without the use of drugs.

Hon, you're right where you need to be--you have the desire to stop. I completely agree with what "cupcake" has suggested you do. We can only give away what was freely given to us--we can't do it for you, but we can lead you in the right direction. If you don't know where to go for help in your area--the best place to start is at your local hospital. They can lead you to help-that's what I did. Someone once told me that if you put the same effort into recovery that you did in finding the ways, means and time that you used to get high--you have the best state of mind and the power to overcome anything that might get in your way.

My friend, if I can, you can to. One day at a time--or one hour at a time--You are so much stronger than you think you are--you've already taken the biggest step--you asked for help--the next step finding the help which is easy. You can do it, I have faith in you. I love you and I'll pray for you.

If you want to talk, just reply to my reply and I'll be there.